


Financial Aid

by TheMinsk



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Romance, Slow Burn, Space Dorks, benefactor AU, the slowest of burns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-06-11 10:31:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 126,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15313566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMinsk/pseuds/TheMinsk
Summary: AU. She knows he's just a benefactor. Just a rich guy looking to help a student in dire financial need. Why can't anyone see that but Rey?





	1. Fees Are Extra

**Author's Note:**

> Hello All! My name is The Minsk and this is my first fic for the Star Wars fandom and for Reylo. This is also my first fic in over six years, so please be gentle. 
> 
> I just love these Space Dorks, they are the best.

Rey Jackson had always been a girl who took pride in herself. As a young woman surviving on her own in a cutthroat world, she knew it was important to stand up for her beliefs, project the strongest image to others, and never allow anyone to see her weaknesses.

At this moment, however, the woman at the Financial Aid desk was going to see a side of Rey that she hadn't unleashed in a long time if she didn't start showing her some empathy and consideration for her world-ending plight.

“Ma'am, I am going to have to ask you to calm down,” the older woman droned in a nasally voice that made Rey cringe. They were on the 10th floor of the administration building of Corellia College and Rey was not alone as she stood in the middle of the busy department. There were men in suits coming in and out of offices, secretaries on phones, other students waiting in line for their turn, and a plethora of people glaring at her for disrupting the normal quiet of the office. None of these things mattered to Rey, who was quickly spiraling into a panic and ignored every person who surrounded her besides the woman who was supposed to be helping her. 

There were two things that Rey was never calm about- food and money. This woman was threatening her with the loss of both, thoroughly catapulting her into a frenzy.

“I am not going to calm down,” she grit through her teeth as her volume increased. More and more people were beginning to stare at her as the back of her neck started to prickle with sweat. “I filed all the necessary paperwork with the office in the spring. Classes have already started and you’re telling me that I owe how much?”

“Right now the balance comprises the cost of full tuition, fees, room and board. That also includes your meal plan, Miss Jackson. It comes to a grand total of $27,595 dollars.” Rey started to rub her temples as a massive stress headache began to settle in her skull.

“How many times do I have to tell you? I should be on a Reduced Tuition List because of my applications with the state for Financial Aid. Plus the check from the government should be coming in for the balance.”

“Yes, the Financial Aid office has notified that your check from the Federal government is on it’s way. However, with the remaining fees, you still come up short at about $8,000 dollars.”

“How is that possible?!” she screeched. “I calculated the tuition down to the penny!”

“Yes, but did you consider the fees? Fees are extra.” Rey wanted the earth to just open up and swallow her whole. How could this be happening to her? “If you’re not registered for at least a payment plan by Friday you will be dropped from your classes for the Fall semester.”

The number rattled around in her brain so much she could barely wrap her head around it. Eight thousand dollars. Eight thousand. It might as well be eight million for all that Rey made at her part-time job. What was she going to do?

“Where is the application for the payment plan?” She asked, biting her lip as all the fight suddenly left her. She felt defeated, like she couldn't argue any more even if she wanted to. Rey was too proud to look up at the faces staring at her, not wanting to see their pity. It was bad enough that she could hear the agitated students behind her, tapping their feet impatiently as they waited for their turn to speak to the bursar. She just wanted to get as far away from this office as possible and retreat to her dorm room to wallow in her misery, but she didn’t even have that luxury. Her next class started in 20 minutes.

“The application can be found online. There are three payment dates: September 10, October 10, and November 10. For your balance of $7,899.76, each payment will come out to $2,633.25. Thank you and have a nice day.”

That was it, then. Rey was officially dismissed and absolutely screwed. She nodded angrily, bit back every nasty curse she wanted to say, and squinted against the tears gathering in her eyes as she made her way out of the office and toward the elevator. She shouldered past the other students in line, the staff members, and the professionals in suits, trying not to notice the looks of sympathy she was receiving. They could take their looks and shove them. They weren’t going to help her pay her bills.

The elevator arrived, and she realized she wasn’t alone when a tall man with long dark hair entered behind her. He was in a tailored, deep-navy suit with a charcoal tie and matching pocket square; the type of suit that informed her that this man had money to spare. He stood to her left and said nothing while she pressed the button for the ground floor. She had the distinct feeling that he was watching her, which she confirmed when she turned to glare at him. It took a moment, but she vaguely recognized him. He had been in the Financial Aid office, exiting one of the offices while she was having her own personal meltdown. She remembered his pale face, his long, sloping nose, and his wide mouth with lips turned down in a frown.

Despite her glare, the ridiculously tall man continued to stare at her without saying anything. While Rey was known for her usually sunny and bright disposition, she was already at the end of her rope and was not in the mood to suffer rich men who didn’t have to worry about tuition and the threat of homelessness. 

“Can I help you?” Rey snapped, obviously startling the man who looked a bit rattled by her outburst. A flash of annoyance shot through his features as his eyes narrowed at her, and she could see his jaw moving around nothing before he finally spoke. 

“Hmmm,” the stranger’s voice was deep, and by the look of him the man had to be in his late twenties or early thirties. Definitely too old to be a student. The suit also bespoke a level of professionalism that none of her other coeds possessed, so what was he doing here? “I wonder if you can.” 

His answer threw her off and she wondered how long she would have to sit through the most awkward elevator ride of her life. She should have kept her mouth shut and suffered through his staring in silence. Now she had to force her way through this conversation when all she wanted to do was scream and cry and rage at a system that always managed to beat her down into nothing.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m having a shit day and you’re a complete stranger. There isn’t a single thing I can do for you, pal. I’m sorry.” She had to crane her neck up to look at him, and it felt like his broad-shoulders took up half the space around her. The elevator was starting to slow down and she breathed a sigh of relief. Nothing was going to stop her from heading straight for the exit the moment the elevator doors opened. 

Imagine her surprise when the next thing he said stopped her dead in her tracks. 

“Even if it means solving your little financial aid issue?” He asked smoothly, his voice getting deeper with every word he spoke.

It was like the blood had frozen in her veins. His deep voice ricocheted through her, the words “Financial Aid Issue” hovering over her head like the blade of a guillotine. 

The doors opened. People were waiting on the ground floor to enter the elevator, but Rey couldn’t stop looking into the stranger’s deep brown eyes. The man placed a long arm around her shoulder and gently guided her out of the elevator and into the main lobby of the administration building. She didn’t take her eyes off of him once as they walked into a quiet alcove and out of earshot.

Normally, Rey was very good at reading people. She had been in the foster care system since she was a young girl, so it had been an invaluable tool in distinguishing who she could trust and who she could not trust over the years.

This man however, this stranger, was making all of her years of experience fly out of the window. He was an intense-looking man, with his tall stature, broad frame, and eyes that felt like they were staring through her. She sensed power, both physical and mental, based on the way he carried and presented himself to the world. As intimidating as he seemed, however, she couldn't tell yet whether or not his intentions were honorable. But he had piqued her interest greatly and she should at least have the decency to hear him out before she ended their odd conversation.

She looked around to make sure no one could hear her before she addressed the man before her. “Who are you?”

The man’s voice was even. Controlled. Deep in a way that almost began to soothe the sting that the Financial Aid office had left behind. “You may call me Mr. Ren. I am a benefactor of the college.”

Rey’s nose wrinkled in distaste. “So you’re a really rich guy who likes to give his money away?”

The man didn’t smile, but she could detect a dry sense of humor in his tone. He stood tall, posture rigid, with his hands clasped behind his back. Everything about the man screamed professional, from the cut of his suit, to the way he slicked back his black hair. “Ah yes, one could say that.”

“So what does that have to do with me? I’ve already reached my limit as to how much the school can give and I no longer qualify for scholarships because I’m in my third year-”

“I’m not talking about scholarships. I am talking about dinner.”

Rey froze. That was the last thing she had expected to hear from the tall, suited man before her.

“W-What?”

“How old are you?” She could not keep up with the conversation she was having with the man in front of her. He kept interrupting her, and every single thing that came out of his mouth threw her off in the most debilitating way.

“I’m twenty, about to be twenty-one…” He cut her off again.

“And your name?”

“Well, it’s Rey, with an ‘e’. . .” She trailed off when he pulled out a business card and handed it over to her. The card was black, embossed in thick red ink. The name Kylo Ren could be seen on the front, followed by a phone number and a business address. She was struck dumb as she stared at it, feeling his eyes linger on the crown of her head. 

“Call this number. Make an appointment with my secretary for dinner. If you show up, you won’t have to worry about your September tuition payment.”

It took a minute for Rey to process what the man in front of her was saying. Dinner? Tuition? Was he…? Did he just position her for . . .?

She had never been so angry before in her life.

“I don’t,” she could barely speak through the overwhelming offense that was building in her chest. Did this man think she was a ...? “I'm not just some whore you can boss around and throw money at…”

“I didn't say anything about sex,” he interrupted her again, even more coldly than before. “All I said was dinner.” She was about to argue with him once more and the man, Mr. Ren, sighed angrily. “Take the card. You're either going to meet me tonight or you're not. I hope you have enough self preservation to make the right choice.” With a pronounced frown pulling down his lips, Mr. Ren stuffed his hands into his pockets and walked away from Rey without another word, leaving her alone in the dim alcove.

Rey was as silent as death as the man stalked off. She refused to take her eyes off of him as he left the building and disappeared into the sea of students that were making their way across campus. The embossed writing of the card brushed against her fingers as she turned it over and over in her hand. A million jumbled thoughts ran through her mind and she was too overwhelmed to grab one of them and try to decipher what she had just experienced.

What the hell had just happened? Everything had unraveled so fast that Rey could hardly believe it. The emotional whiplash left her stunned as she considered her very limited options.

The first option was to rip up the card and pretend that their conversation had never happened. Rey had never seen the man before and she had been a student at CC for two whole years. What was the chance that they would run into one another again? Highly unlikely. She had been taking care of herself for years, and this snafu with the financial aid office was sure to work itself out sooner or later. Right?

She doubted it. Her financial aid woes would see her homeless and without an education, something Rey could simply not abide. Her second option, the only other viable option available, was to call the number. But then what? What could possibly come of it? Could the man be telling the truth? Was he willing to offer her almost three grand just to show up to dinner?

Her common sense said no. A very dark, secret part of her that did not trust anyone was screaming at her that this was a trick. He was trying to get her alone for some unknown and nefarious reason so he could take advantage of her, she was sure of it.

However, she didn't feel very sure of it. As aloof and cold as the man seemed, she couldn't sense any maliciousness in his actions. Maybe Mr. Ren really was just a benefactor. A rich guy willing to extend his generosity to a student in need. He had been there to witness her quasi-meltdown, and knew she was in financial straits. This was just his way of helping the school out, albeit in a more personal, life-changing way.

Could this man truly be the answer to her plight? Was he really willing to help her out of the goodness of his heart? Or in this case, the goodness of his wallet.

There was only one way to find out. She pulled out her cell phone and dialed the number printed in red as she exited the administration building and headed towards her next class. A man with a crisp accent answered on the third ring.

“Mr. Ren’s office, this is Mitaka speaking. How may I help you?”

“Good Afternoon, my name is Rey Jackson and I was told by Mr. Ren to call and set up an appointment for dinner…”


	2. Terms and Conditions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the Comments, Kudos, and Subscriptions! You are making The Minsk feel very welcome here at ao3!

Rey checked her phone for what felt like the hundredth time that evening as the late summer sun began to set. It took a long time to get ready, curling her wavy brown hair with her iron and ample amounts of mousse as she remembered the slew of text messages she had received from Mr. Ren’s secretary throughout the afternoon.

_Mr. Ren has ordered a car to pick you up at 8 pm sharp._

_Mr. Ren wants to inform you that the dress code for the restaurant is formal._

_Mr. Ren requests you wear red, if you are able._

It was the last one that threw her off her balance the most. If this Kylo Ren were nothing but a harmless benefactor, why would he require she wear a certain color to dinner? She was nervous enough accepting his invitation, did he have to make it even more awkward for her? He was lucky she owned a black cocktail dress with some red trim around the neck and arms. The cut wasn't very flattering on her tall, slim frame but she had dug it out of a bin at the local thrift shop so it would have to suffice for the time being.

Trying her hardest to shake away her nerves, Rey tried to focus on putting on her makeup in the small vanity mirror in her dorm room. Her roommate Rose, a sweet girl who was also in the same engineering program as Rey, was away with her sister for the night. That allowed Rey to go through with this dinner without being bombarded by too many questions. Finn and Poe, her other friends from her part-time job, were busy with first-week frat events and she wouldn't be seeing them any time soon either.

How would she even explain any of this to them? Would they even believe her? Would they call her crazy? Would they lock her in her room and try to stop her from going?

Maybe she was a little crazy for having accepted this offer, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Besides, there was a plus side to all of this. She was getting a free meal, for one, with the promise of money for tuition. And two…

Mr. Ren was actually quite handsome.

Once she had gotten over the shock of their initial meeting, she had taken some time during her boring lecture to try and examine their conversation to the best of her ability. As awkward and distant as he seemed, there was something very attractive about him. She had appreciated his long hair first, and the way he swept it back and away from his long and angular face. It allowed his large ears to poke out of the sides of his hair in an endearing way. Also, despite the coldness of his demeanor, she could sense that he was shy. Quiet. Observant.

It was a behavior that she was used to. Rey was accustomed to blending into the shadows, observing everyone and everything while waiting for something to go wrong. Mr. Ren carried that same energy around with him, if not a bit more volatile.

They were alike in that way, she guessed.

Maybe that was why she had decided to agree to this dinner. 

At 7:50, she slipped on the only pair of heels she had ever owned and made her way down the crowded dorm staircase to the ground floor. Other students were getting ready to spend their Friday night out after a long first week of classes, making their way towards the cramped bars of the town. Rey was heading for the parking lot in the opposite direction, where a sleek black sedan with tinted windows was waiting for her. A man exited the driver’s side and came around to open the door for her.

This was it. Rey took a nervous gulp, centered her shoulders, and allowed herself to be chauffeured to dinner. 

The car made its way into the affluent part of town, where glittering lights decorated the streets outside fashionable bistros and boutiques. Luxury vehicles lined the roads and people dressed in their finest sauntered along the sidewalks. 

Rey frowned, feeling like an impostor amongst such wealth. Rey knew that everything on her body right now had been rummaged at a Salvation Army store, but she refused to let it get to her as the car maneuvered its way towards the restaurant that Mr. Ren had chosen. 

The car slowed in front of a restaurant with a brick front and large windows. The lighting inside was dim, and many people stood outside hoping for a chance at a table. The chauffeur helped her out of the car and escorted her to the server at the front door. Rey could feel the eyes of dozens of patrons on her as she was led ahead of them all.

“This is Mr. Ren’s guest,” the driver said. The hostess smiled warmly.

“Yes, he's waiting for you. Right this way.” The hostess guided her in past the other waiting guests, into a small and intimate dining area.

Rey noticed Kylo Ren the moment she walked into the room. He stood up swiftly once he noticed her as well. She'd thought that he had been large and imposing in the elevator, but it was nothing in comparison to seeing him next to the other people around him. The man was a giant. He stood out from among the others in his crisp navy suit, the same one from that morning, and the only thing different than her memory was that his hair was a bit more disheveled. Less polished than earlier that day.

He pulled out her chair for her and waited for her to approach.

“Miss Jackson,” he said as a greeting. His voice rumbled around her, but did little to soothe her jagged nerves. Now that she was here, her bravery was leaving her rather quickly and she tried to hold onto it as long as possible.

“Mr. Ren,” she returned, hoping her voice sounded even as she sat down. He slid the chair in behind her and his hand lingered for a moment before he returned to his seat. 

“How are you this evening?” She opened up the menu, hoping for a distraction so she didn't have to look into his eyes. His gaze was quite intense and she was already feeling flustered enough. She took small little peeks at him though, trying to avoid eye contact. He was even more attractive now that she wasn’t distracted by her previous panic.

“I am well, thank you. Just a bit tired after the first week of classes.” She looked up and saw him nod over the rim of his menu.

“I am sorry to hear that.” He cleared his throat. “I am quite happy that you agreed to join me tonight.” She gathered enough courage to drop her menu and meet his eyes, keeping her breathing even. 

“Thank you for the invitation, Mr. Ren,” she shifted awkwardly in her seat. “I was unsure at first of your intentions, but I want to believe that they are honorable and good.” She trailed off, waiting for some kind of affirmation that he was a peaceful, benevolent soul who was simply trying to help save the world one broke student at a time. 

But he didn't respond to her, which didn't sit well with Rey. Before she could say anything else, a waiter came by for their drink order. She went to open her mouth to order a ginger ale, but Mr. Ren quickly held up his hand to cut her off. She clamped her mouth shut as a reflex while he started to order their drinks. A sparkling water with lemon for her, and a whiskey on the rocks for him. It was simple enough, but the action left her reeling. What arrogance! What assumption!

There was a part of her that wanted to rage at this man for this simple, yet dominant, act. A vicious voice was howling with righteousness that this Kylo Ren would take control of her life so easily. Rey, who had always taken care of herself, who had never relied on another person before, wanted to scream at his pompousness and tell him to shove his money and his power and his influence up his ass, tuition be damned.

But there was another part of her, a small, secret part of her that she kept hidden under lock and key, that had always wondered what it would be like to be taken care of. 

What would it be like, to not have that crushing weight of responsibility on her shoulders all the time? What would it be like for someone to just take control, take charge, and allow her a moment where she didn't have to make every single decision because her life literally depended on it?

So she allowed him to order the drinks, swallowing her pride again in front of this man. This man who made her feel like every part of her was under a microscope, ready for his inspection. For a moment she felt like every inch of the dumpster-diving scavenger rat she had always been and wallowed in the familiarity of her feelings. She was wearing glorified rags and she felt so out-of-place here where she didn’t belong. . . 

“What is your class load this semester?” Mr. Ren asked, snapping Rey’s attention back to the present. She cleared her throat and dutifully went through her 18-credit semester in detail, noting which classes required an extra lab and which were electives. Then she went into the requirements for her entire 60 credit engineering major and her 48 credit minor in sociology. He sat and listened quietly, even more attentive than her own advisor had been during their counseling sessions over the past three semesters. 

“Are you a member of any organizations around campus? Greek life?” 

She shook her head. “No, I’m not in a sorority. Besides my part time job at CCC, I'm not very involved around campus. I'm more focused on school.” His head tilted in confusion.

“CCC? What’s that?”

“Corellia Campus Catering. It's my part-time job.”

His lips turned up in a sneer, but he didn’t offer any further comment. She bristled at his haughty, pompous expression. He had probably never worked a job involving actual labor in his entire life. His intense gaze suddenly turned serious.

“Do you drink? Do drugs?” He asked, and she instantly knew that an answer in the affirmative meant their meal would not last long.

“I mean, I've never done drugs but I have had a drink before. To me it's just a waste of money and I rarely do it.”

He nodded. “I see.” He didn't continue the conversation and they fell into an awkward silence. She kept peeking up at him to see if he would speak again, but minutes passed by without a single word being said and Rey didn’t know how to further the conversation. He seemed so solemn, so serious and untouchable. He carried an air of gravitas around him that flustered Rey and made her uncharacteristically shy.

When the waiter came with the drinks, Mr. Ren looked to her to place her food order. She hadn't planned on picking her meal after he had ordered their drinks, so she looked down at the menu and ordered the first thing she saw. The price of the entree made her eyes bulge out in shock, but before she could say anything or change her mind, the waiter took the menus and left them alone once more.

Rey didn't know what to do next. Mr. Ren was now staring at her, and while it looked like he had something to say, he remained fully silent. He kept looking at her with his dark eyes and she didn't know how to respond to his intense attention. This older, attractive man, who had way more money than Rey would ever have in her life, was staring at her in a way that made her skin feel tingly. The good kind of tingly.

The kind of tingly that traveled down into places she didn't want to think of right now, not when she was feeling so unmoored.

She decided to break the unwanted silence.

“Mr. Ren, can I be frank?”

“You've been nothing but frank since the moment we met, I would hate for you to start acting different now.” Damn, his tone was so dry and deprecating. It was maddening.

“What are your intentions with me this evening?” His mood darkened instantly, the energy around them shifting in mere moments.

“I thought I made that perfectly clear this afternoon, Miss Jackson,” he said through gritted teeth. “We are simply sharing a meal. Nothing more.”

“I know,” she said, twisting her napkin in her hands. “But then your secretary gave me your demands for my clothes, and this is literally the fanciest, most expensive dinner of my life,” she sighed, trying to articulate her confusion. She wasn't trying to make him angry, she just wanted answers. 

“I just wish I knew more about you, I guess is what I am trying to say. It would make me feel more at ease about all this.” Rey took a deep breath. “I want to trust you, but I'm not very good at trusting people, and I need to know that I'm not going to get hurt or taken advantage of.”

She waited for his response, which was a long time coming. She sipped at her sparkling water, wishing it was a ginger ale when he finally answered her in a tone that barely hid his frustration.

“I have donated over $500,000 dollars to that college in the five years since my- since President Organa took over the school.” His jaw worked around his anger as he continued. “I see the potential there, and I want to know that my investment is being used to benefit the college as a whole.” Rey nodded and her anxiety started to ease a bit. It was being replaced by a growing respect as he explained himself further. 

“Today I had a meeting with the financial officers of the college and they said my yearly donations were being slotted into the budget for an ‘interactive website development project’.” He used his fingers to make air quotes and the disgust on his face was palpable. “I was furious. I wanted that money to go to renovating the library, or buying new instruments for the orchestra, or. . .,” he shot Rey a pointed look, “. . . helping students who have issues with tuition.” 

Realization dawned on her and she let out a sigh of relief as he quickly dropped his eyes from hers, no longer angry and suddenly very shy.

That was it, then. Rey’s mind was officially made up. Mr. Ren really was just a simple benefactor, like he had claimed to be earlier that day. His intentions to help her had been nothing but pure from the very beginning. He truly was looking to help her in regards to her financial woes. A veritable weight was lifted off of her shoulders as his eyes met hers once more.

“You have a fire in you, Miss Jackson. I saw it this morning as you spoke with the bursar. I saw it again in the elevator when you addressed me like the impertinent stranger that I was.” She couldn't tell if his lips had turned in a smirk or a grimace since it was gone as quick as it had come. “I like to make investments, and my investments mean a lot to me. I plan to help you financially, yes, but I also hope to groom you into the adult I think you are meant to be. I believe my influence will be beneficial to you, and your company will be beneficial to me.” 

It was the most that Mr. Ren had spoken since their initial meeting that morning. He was an intense man, someone who knew exactly what he wanted at all times and expected to receive it. Someone who had very high expectations and little tolerance for error. A person Rey could respect.

What affected Rey the most about Mr. Ren's speech, however, was the fact that he had seen a part of her that no one had ever noticed before, not even her friends.

Sweet, sunny Rey, forced to be happy because showing everyone how miserable she was didn’t fit into people’s expectations. Life had been cruel to Rey, which had left her with a thick skin and a small, yet powerful, chip on her shoulder. It was easy enough to hide it from her friends and teachers, because they cared about her and she cared about them. But that angry fire inside of her, that passion always wanting the space to breathe and be free, was constantly being smothered by the injustices of her world.

Sometimes she wished she could let it out for good. Sometimes she thought that no one truly knew her. 

But this man, this Kylo Ren, could see her. Could see her fire, her need to succeed. He wanted to help her overcome her financial burdens in order to live the life she had always been meant to live. 

“You need a teacher, Miss Jackson. If you let me be that teacher to you, I will help you pay for not only this semester, but the final semesters of your degree.” Rey could do nothing but listen in silence as he continued to speak, the thought too good to be true. “There will be some terms and conditions of course, but we can settle most of them now.” That snapped her out of her reverie quickly.

“Terms and conditions?” she echoed.

“Yes, well, as I said, this arrangement is not only for you. I look to benefit from your company as well.” She tilted her head in confusion, but he didn’t offer any further elaboration. How was he going to benefit from her company if their arrangement had nothing to do with sex or intimacy? “We will be meeting for dinner twice a week, sometimes more or less depending on my schedule. I travel a lot for work and sometimes I am out of the country for extended periods of time, but you will be notified by my secretary if anything changes at the last minute.”

“What do you do?” She asked.

“I work in international trade,” he supplied. “There are often events I must attend through work. Galas, awards, dinners, charity events and the like. I will ask you to attend some of these events with me. I will often tell you what to wear, and what to do at these events, such as I did earlier with ordering your drink. I could tell that you were not fond of it, but if you are to be my companion during these times it must be the norm.” Was that a smirk on his face? It was gone before she could even notice it. “Do you have a problem with anything I have just said?”

Rey thought about her answer slowly and deliberately before speaking. The pieces of their arrangement were slowly starting to gather into a picture that made Rey flush with excitement. Mr. Ren wanted her to be his companion in exchange for tuition money, which sounded simple enough to her. While she wasn't fond of being bossed around on a normal basis, she couldn’t deny that this was the best situation she could have ever hoped for.

He wasn’t asking for sex, and there were absolutely no expectations other than showing up when he wanted her there. Their relationship would be that of a mentor and a mentee. A master and an apprentice. She would be a fool to pass up an arrangement like this.

This was better than any job Rey could ever imagine.

“I have some terms and conditions of my own,” she said slowly, gauging Mr. Ren’s reaction. He didn't look upset, merely curious.

“You do? Ah, yes, you do,” he mused lowly and waited for her to continue. 

“Nothing can get in the way with school. It's my number one priority and the reason I'm here at this dinner in the first place, so it would be stupid to jeopardize that in any way.”

“Agreed, your education is my top priority, Miss Jackson. Anything else?”

“Yes, in fact. There is.” She took a deep breath and decided honesty was the best route to take. “You obviously know that I have experienced financial hardships, but you really know nothing about me. I don't have a family. I grew up in London as a ward of the state, dumpster-diving for clothes and hoarding anything I could get my hands on as I bounced from home to home.” She steeled herself and looked up at him in defiance. “But I am not some charity case, Mr. Ren. I am in America for an education and to better my life. I have worked hard for everything I have ever accomplished, and I refuse to allow you to think I am desperate or willing to do drastic things for money. I’m not.” She hadnt meant to sound so emphatic, but she couldn't help it. If he was going to be her mentor, her benefactor, then his opinion meant something and she didn’t want him getting any ideas about her character.

There was silence, and for a moment Kylo Ren looked at her like he was seeing her for the very first time. A warm glow entered his gaze but was gone as quickly as it had come. The moment was fleeting but at last, she didn't feel like she was being scrutinized under a microscope by the lofty Mr. Ren.

“I have nothing but the utmost respect for you, Miss Jackson,” was his sole response. It left a warm feeling floating in her chest as she turned the words around in her head. This man, who held so much power and money and influence, respected a nobody like her. How could she not show him the same amount of respect? On those grounds, they were complete and utter equals.

The waiter returned with their meal and Rey had never seen food look so sumptuous in her life. Mr. Ren was content to stop all conversation as they ate their meal in an amicable silence, much more manageable than earlier in the evening. It was a nice, companionable moment between new acquaintances who were sharing a meal together for the first time. It was simple and sweet, and for Rey, who had shared very few meals with others before starting college, she had truly enjoyed every minute of it. 

The food tasted almost otherworldly to her. She had ordered the duck and had never eaten a more tender meat or a gravy so rich in her life. The potatoes were smooth and creamy, and the salad was topped with blue cheese, cranberries, and walnuts. She was tempted to lick the plate clean after she had finished. 

Rey finally looked up at her benefactor to see that Mr. Ren had been staring at her eat the whole time. She had been so engrossed in her meal that she hadn't even noticed. Her cheeks turned pink under his intense scrutiny once more, once again feeling self-conscious. 

“I've never eaten anything so delicious in my life,” she said sheepishly, trying to cover her embarrassment. It was one thing to shove her face full of food at the campus buffet, and another thing to eat like a starved mongrel in public. The waiter came to deliver the bill and Mr. Ren didn't even look at it, he just passed over a black credit card to the man and waved him off. While Mr. Ren didn't comment on her table manners, he didn't look impressed with her either. 

“The meal was adequate, but you seemed to have enjoyed it.” It was going to take a while for Rey to get used to this man's mercurial moods. “Since we will be sharing many more of them in the future, please do not hesitate to let me know which kinds of foods you prefer.”

She blushed again, not having much culinary experience outside of fast food and frozen dinners and hesitant to admit it. But there was definitely something she wanted to get off of her chest while they were still on-topic. “I prefer ginger ale.” 

He hummed, an amused sound leaving his wide mouth. He nodded but didn't respond. 

“I want you to email my secretary a copy of your daily schedule, your class syllabi, your transcript, and your educational plan. I want to be informed of every grade, every project, every paper, and every absence throughout the semester.” Rey didn't think she could be more shocked as the waiter returned with the charge slip. He signed the paper and left a 100$ bill on the table for a tip as if it were an afterthought while he continued to speak. 

“I care not about your daily lessons, they are trivial to me and mean nothing. During our dinners we will discuss what you have achieved, how you have improved, and what you still need to overcome. If I see that you are becoming frivolous or lackadaisical in your studies, my offer will be rescinded. If you engage in reckless, dangerous, or criminal behavior, the offer will also be rescinded. Am I clear?”

Rey was so blown away by his demands she could do nothing but nod. Paying for her tution was one thing, but this was a level of consideration that Rey had never experienced before. No one had ever cared about Rey's education. No one had ever asked her how she had done on an exam, or what score she had gotten on a final. No one had noticed that she had worked her entire life for her scholarship and had graduated 5th in her high school class despite years of neglect and homelessness. 

No one. Not her social workers, nor her many foster parents, nor her advisors. No one had cared until Mr. Ren.

“Yes, I'll have it all to him by Monday.” She shook her head in disbelief, feeling overwhelmed and emotional. “Thank you. For everything you're doing for me. Thank you.”

Mr. Ren's eyes flashed dangerously as she felt the energy shift around him again in an instant. “Don't thank me, Miss Jackson. I am not a kind man, and I am not a bleeding heart philanthropist. I am a man who makes investments and seeks to gain from them. You should remember that always.”

She was definitely going to remember one thing about Mr. Ren. This man was not a saint. 

But he just might be her savior.

She couldn’t help herself. Despite his words and surly demeanor, she just had to smile at this absolute enigma of a man. “I will, Mr. Ren.”

He blinked at her a few times before clearing his throat and continuing as if she hadn’t spoken.

“I have already made arrangements with the financial aid office and your September payment has been accepted in full. I will be seeing you for dinner this coming Tuesday. I will need you for an event this coming Friday. Mitaka will be sending you the details shortly.” With that, Mr. Ren stood up abruptly and came around to her side of the table to help her up as well. He placed his hand at the junction of her lower back as he guided her out of the restaurant, past the people who were still waiting for a table, and toward a car she didn't know he had ordered. 

The night was over. Nothing had happened besides talking and eating dinner, just like he had promised.

She looked up at him. “Will you be driving with me?”

He shook his head. “No, I have a separate car.” She tried not to feel disappointed. The dinner had gone so much better than she had ever imagined, and now that she knew he was nothing more than a benefactor, she kind of wanted to get to know him more. 

But there would be time for that. He had already scheduled two more meetings within the next week and he had promised to invest in her education all the way through to the end of her bachelor's degree. They would get the chance to know each other better soon enough.

The reality of her situation was beginning to sink in and it barely felt real. She could have considered it all an elaborate fairy tale until Mr. Ren opened his mouth and firmly burst her fantasy bubble. 

“Your clothing has proven to be quite disappointing, and since we have many events on the horizon, I am going to arrange a fitting for you in the next few days so we can get you dressed in some more flattering options.” 

Ouch, that stung her pride more than just a little bit. Rey huffed, turning her nose up and away from him as she tried not to let her spirits freefall. What a rude, cold, aloof man this was! One moment he was almost what one would call considerate, and the next he was ripping her appearance apart like her self-esteem meant nothing. 

“However,” he continued, and for a moment Rey thought she could see a small blush color his pale cheeks in the dim light of the street lamps. “Your hair and makeup were quite perfect this evening.” He coughed and Rey knew for sure that the tips of his ears were turning pink. “Yes, I would say more than adequate for the events that we have coming up.” 

Without another word, he helped her into the car and shut the door firmly as he signaled the driver to leave. They didn't even say goodbye as the car pulled away from the curb. She turned around in her seat and watched as his tall, imposing figure became smaller and smaller on the sidewalk until the car finally turned and he left her sight. 

Rey hugged her handbag close to her chest, trying to relive all of the crazy events of the last twelve hours. She had gone from borderline destitute to completely financially stable in the span of a day and the thought left her reeling in the backseat of the car. When she looked over to the side, a stupid grin stretched across her face, she noticed a small manilla envelope on the seat next to her. She picked it up and looked at the neat scrawl that was addressed to her.

_“To Rey,_

_For textbooks and a new laptop._

_Work hard and life will reward you well._

_-KR"_

The envelope was filled with hundred dollar bills.


	3. The Exchange

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three updates in a row! I am loving everyone's response to this fic! Like I mentioned, it's been six years since I wrote Glee fanfiction for my first OTP Finchel, but I hope my writing is becoming more cohesive as the story continues. Getting back on the writing bicycle has been shaky, but fun. And my only goal is to make these two Space Dorks as in-character as possible, so please let me know if I am succeeding!

One thousand dollars. 

He had given her _one thousand dollars._

For _books._

Rey couldn’t stop staring at the manila envelope she was hiding in the top drawer of her dorm room desk as she pretended to do her homework on the old, refurbished laptop she had bought off of Groupon last summer. She kept using her right hand to open the drawer in an inane attempt to make sure it was still there. The thought of someone stealing it was on her mind constantly. Rey was the poster child for trust issues, and having this money around was testing all of her limits. Sometimes Rose left their door unlocked when she showered, which had never bothered Rey before now, but Rey had also never been in possession of such a sum of money in her life and was officially becoming a paranoid mess over it.

The equations on the computer screen were starting to blend together into scribbles as she sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. The money was all she could think about. She, Rey Jackson, who had never even held a one-hundred dollar bill before Friday, was now in possession of ten of them. She was going to need to open up a bank account, something close to campus where she could deposit her money right away without drawing too much attention towards her. Normally she just cashed her checks from her part-time job in town, but now she was hiding a vast sum of money in a place where people would rip her to shreds for just a percentage of what she had received. College kids weren’t known for their deep pockets, and Rey trusted no one after a hard life growing up on the streets of London. 

Rose and Finn, who were cuddled up on Rose’s bed across from Rey’s desk, were laughing at an episode of Parks and Recreation on Netflix while Poe lounged on her bed sideways with his head dangling off the side. He was trying to catch M&M’s in his mouth while killing time before a party at his frat house. She had met both Finn and Poe through Campus Catering and had introduced Rose to Finn last semester. The two had been dating ever since. She was blessed to know Rose, Finn and Poe; they were her anchor here in America, and the only true friends she had ever known.

However, while her friends meant the world to her, the envelope in her desk felt like a massive weight on her shoulders and Rey was debating whether or not to tell them what was going on between her and Mr. Ren. She was worried about being judged, or misunderstood by the only people she truly trusted. She struggled with how to address the topic at hand.

_“Hey guys, I met a startlingly attractive rich man who wants to give me money to do my homework!”_

How would her friends even begin to believe something like that? Especially from Rey, who had never accepted charity before in her life.

 _But it’s not charity_ , she said to herself, remembering their conversation from the night before. _It’s an investment in my future._

She sighed loudly and closed the fuzzy laptop screen. Tomorrow she was taking a bus to the nearest Best Buy in order to put Mr. Ren’s money to use. Her textbooks had already been purchased for the semester, but she could still use the money to buy a new computer like he had suggested. Her friends would notice, though, if she showed up with a brand new computer that cost more than she made in a month. 

They would also notice the new clothes, and the late nights out . . .

Rey really had no choice. She had to tell them.

“Hey guys,” she said, interrupting the episode where Leslie and Ben staged a Model United Nations competition. “I need to talk to you about something.”

“Sure, Peanut, what’s up?” Finn reached over and paused the TV while Poe righted himself on her bed. All eyes were on her, and she took a deep breath before speaking.

“Remember how I received that call from the financial aid office on Friday morning?” Rose nodded while Finn and Poe waited for her to continue. “Well I got some pretty bad news. . .” She went into detail about her meeting with the bursar, explaining the balance that she owed the school and the payment plan she had to apply for. Her friends were getting angrier and angrier on her behalf, but she was worried about how they would handle the next part.

“So I don’t get it,” Poe said, rubbing the shadow of stubble on his chin. “They’re gonna drop your registration if you don’t get the money by Monday? But that’s two days away!”

This was it. Fear prickled the back of her neck as she took a deep breath. Her fingers twisted together as her hands rested in her lap.

“Well no, not exactly. The first payment cleared in full yesterday.” She looked up at three confused faces.

“How can that be?” Rose asked. “Did you qualify for another loan?”

Rey couldn’t meet their eyes. Her heart was pounding so fast her chest hurt. There was a part of her, a part that was growing stronger and stronger by the second, that simply didn’t want to tell them. A tiny, unrecognizable voice in her head wanted to keep her agreement with Mr. Ren a secret. 

The thought turned over in her brain once more. Why shouldn’t she keep their arrangement a secret? What she had agreed to was her business, and no one else needed to know what was happening except for her and Mr. Ren. 

There was no use denying the simple truth: Rey knew, deep down, that if she tried to explain her relationship with her benefactor her friends wouldn’t believe her. Even Rey herself had jumped to conclusions and thought Mr. Ren was asking for sex, so of course her friends would think the same thing. It was hard for her to believe what was happening, and she was the one who had sat through dinner with the man. She was the one who had agreed to his demands for her time and company. 

So did they really have to know? Besides, he had never given her express permission to tell other people about their deal; maybe he had wanted her to keep it a secret. Perhaps she could twist the truth around a little bit so they didn’t have to know _everything._

“I was able to meet someone who connected me with a different kind of work study program,” she said slowly, testing out the words on her tongue as she spoke them. She tried to sound as light and airy as possible, despite the fact that they could probably hear her heart pounding over the sound of her voice. Finn and Poe both tilted their heads in confusion.

“But we already have a job with CCC,” Finn said. “Will you have to quit?”

“No, I wasn’t told that I had to quit CCC,” she said thoughtfully. While Mr. Ren had sneered at her job, he hadn’t told her to quit it. “It’s a program that’s going to help supplement the rest of my tuition. I have a special…” she trailed off, trying to find the right word. “... Advisor. I’ll be working for him for the foreseeable future, and the money I earn throughout the semester will go towards the balance on my account.”

It was close enough to the truth, but the words left a sour taste on her tongue. Her friends seemed confused but curious about the whole thing and continued to ask questions. She was lying to her best friends and they had no idea whatsoever.

‘It’s better this way,’ she thought to herself. 

“What about your current advisor, Professor Skywalker?” Rose asked. While Rey loved her engineering classes, she wasn’t too fond of the head of the program, Director Krennic. He was a hard man to please, and she had requested that her advisor for her minor in sociology, Professor Skywalker, take over the job of advising her educational plan. He had been more than happy to help, and part of the reason why she enjoyed her sociology major so much was because of the gentle, wise professor and his wry sense of humor. “Will you still be meeting with him?”

“Yes, of course,” she replied. “Like I said, this program is supplemental. I have to put in a few hours a week with my new advisor, but it will help me afford school.”

Finn laughed, rubbing the back of his neck in a bashful way. “This sounds too good to be true, Peanut. Is there any way I can sign up?” Finn was also under the same financial burdens as Rey, and had grown up in a very similar situation here in the United States. They both struggled with making enough money to afford tuition and their basic daily needs. However, her tuition was much higher than his because she was an international student, despite everything she had done to keep it low. That didn’t stop the red blush of shame that creeped up her collar. 

Who was she to have such luxury laid down at her feet? What had she done to deserve Mr. Ren’s kindness when there were people all around the world struggling to make it through the day? Finn was infinitely more kind and gentle than anyone Rey had ever known, Rey herself included. So why was she the recipient of such a bounty when her best friend was being forced to struggle?

“I don’t know, Finn. I think I qualified because I’m an international student.” She couldn’t look him in the eyes.

“Well, to me this sounds amazing,” Poe said, drawing everyone’s attention. “We won’t get to see you as much, but hey, if you were kicked out of school we wouldn’t be seeing you at all.”

Rose smiled and nodded enthusiastically. “Absolutely. I think it’s perfect for you Rey. I would hate to see you leave Corellia College.”

Rey rubbed the back of her neck, a bashful smile on her face. “Yeah, without my student visa it’s back to London. . .” She trailed off, not wanting to think about the life she had left behind. She had wasted too much of her scant twenty years waiting for nothing to happen, and she would be damned if she went crawling back to Plutt like a dog, begging for scraps.

Never again. There were many reasons why Rey had agreed to Mr. Ren’s demands, and not all of them had to do with tuition.

“But no worries, I’m pretty sure everything will be okay now,” Rey didn’t know who she was trying to convince, but the words sounded pretty hollow to her ears. She couldn't tell if her friends had noticed by the optimistic look on their faces.

“I’m sure you’re right, Peanut,” Finn said, trying to lighten the tension as he unpaused the episode of Parks and Recreation. Rose snuggled into his side and Poe became distracted by his phone. The conversation was over, and Rey felt a little better after divulging some information about Mr. Ren to her beloved friends, despite the little white lies she had peppered into a loose version of the truth. 

Her anxiety spiked, however, when her cell phone suddenly started buzzing, drawing her friends’ attention back towards her once again.

“Who is it?” Rose asked. “All of your friends are right here,” she joked. Rey didn’t laugh when she saw Ren’s office number flash on her screen. It made her heart jolt in her chest in a not-so-unpleasant way.

“I think it might be my advisor,” she said, throwing on her slippers and robe and heading for the hallway. She refused to answer it until she was alone. “I’ll be right back!” 

“Wait, Rey, we can pause it again!” Finn called after her, but she slammed the door behind her as she raced to the common room on her floor. The phone continued to ring incessantly and she rushed to pick it up before it went to voicemail.

“Hello?” She answered, almost breathless from a mix of running and anticipation. Thankfully, the common room was empty since it was the first Saturday night of the semester. Everybody with a social life was out partying while she was laying low and doing homework. Finn and Poe were only stopping by for a little while before bringing Rose to their frat party. Rey had no intention of attending. 

“Miss Jackson,” was the low response on the other line. She had thought his secretary Mr. Mitaka would be the one calling, but it was Mr. Ren himself. His voice sounded even deeper on the phone, and infinitely more impatient. “Good evening.”

She was still a bit out of breath from running. “Good evening, Mr. Ren, how can I help you?”

“It’s ‘may,’” he growled, and she was caught off guard by his statement and his argumentative tone.

“Excuse me?” She questioned with a huff.

“You should be saying ‘How may I help you,’ Miss Jackson.” She didn’t know how to respond to that as silence blanketed their awkward conversation. Did he call her just to be an asshole and comment on her grammar? She gulped before speaking again, since he refused to say another word until she fixed her mistake.

“How may I help you, Mr. Ren?” Her voice was hollow as she repeated the words, feeling like a young girl who had just been scolded. Her tone was rife with annoyance and she had to bite her tongue to avoid saying anything nasty. There had to be an actual reason why he had called; Mr. Ren didn’t seem like the kind of man who did things frivolously. However, he still hesitated and lengthened their already awkward conversation into something borderline uncomfortable. Rey was halfway to furious when she heard a bitter chuckle on the other end. The noise made a shiver trail up her spine in an ominous way.

“Please let me know If I am correct,” he said, his voice tinged with vitriol, and Rey was confused once more at his rapidly shifting emotions as he continued. “Right now you are spitting mad at me, and wondering why I am calling you when I have a secretary.” She didn’t have a chance to speak before he cut in again with more assumptions. “You’re probably at a party, out dancing and enjoying your youth with your mindless friends, and you have no idea why I am wasting your time on nothing. You probably want to yell at me, or dismiss me as you had tried to do in the elevator.” His deep voice became as rough as gravel as he continued with his hypercritical tone. “But you can’t get rid of me that easily, Miss Jackson. I will not be ignored.”

Rey didn't know how to respond to such accusations from someone she barely knew. For a moment, Rey wondered if she had done anything at dinner last night to offend the man. She couldn’t imagine where this hostile behavior was coming from. He seemed furious at her for no reason whatsoever. Was it because it took so long to answer the phone? Her poor grammar? 

She didn’t know why he was acting this way, but this dark mood was only serving to deepen her curiosity about her odd new benefactor. The call was coming from his office, which meant that he was working on a Saturday night, sending a stab of empathy through her. She knew what it was like to work at all hours of the day and night, but for him it probably wasn’t out of necessity, but choice. Was he a workaholic? Did he have no social life at all? 

With a deep breath, Rey decided that there were two ways she could handle the situation in front of her. 

Her first instinct was to start yelling at him for his rude and presumptuous behavior. He had no right to lob accusations at her for no reason, and they were barely even acquaintances yet. They had spent less than an hour total in each other’s company, and Rey was not one to suffer arrogant, argumentative fools. Part of her just wanted to hang up on him.

However, her second instinct was to respond to Mr. Ren with a little bit of gentleness. Despite the fact that they were still practically strangers, it was remarkably easy to imagine Mr. Ren all alone in his office on a Saturday night. No co-workers or secretary to keep him company. No mention of parties, or events, or associates to meet for drinks.

It hit Rey in a place where she was most vulnerable. Nothing affected Rey the way the ache of loneliness did. Loneliness had been her constant companion for years, and she could sense the bitter sting of it in the voice of her benefactor. If it was in her power to ease that sting in another, then she would do it without question. She couldn't be sure of all of her assumptions about him, but Rey decided to go with her second instinct and treat him with a bit of kindness instead of volleying his anger back at him.

“You’re only about ten percent right, Mr. Ren.” Her breathing evened out and she tried to sound as neutral as possible so he couldn't read her mood. There was a moment where he didn’t respond, and Rey was afraid that he had hung up on her. 

“Oh? How so?” She could almost hear the snarl in his response.

“The only thing you were right about was my surprise that you had called me instead of Mr. Mitaka. I’m in my pajamas right now, watching Netflix and studying,” she took a deep breath before her next admission. “And I am very pleased to hear from you.”

It was true. When she had seen the number flash on her screen, her anxiety battled with her excitement at hearing from her benefactor again so soon. Their dinner had been awkward, but sweet in its own unique way. As secretive as he seemed, she had enjoyed spending time with him, and looked forward to seeing him again in the coming days. She wanted to know more about him, and earn his esteem through hard work and determination.

She had a thirst to prove herself to this man. He cared about her education, her achievements, and her goals. That meant something to Rey. Something important.

Her kindness seemed to shock Mr. Ren. “W-what? You are?” Was his stuttered reponse. He didn’t sound like he believed her.

“Yes, I am,” she said warmly. Despite his backhanded compliments and blunt honesty, she had genuinely enjoyed his company. He needed to work on his social skills though. His comments on her lack of sophisticated fashion had really sunk her spirits low. “I am sorry if I somehow upset you, Mr. Ren. It was not my intention.”

There was a short pause before a loud, exhausted sigh could be heard. His voice sounded shaky for a moment before it steadied. “N-no. No. It is I who should be apologizing, Miss Jackson. It was not my intention to speak to you in such a way.” Another stilted breath could be heard. “I am not upset with you. I am simply not accustomed to speaking so conversationally on the phone with others." A dark chuckle could be heard. “Normal phone conversations usually end up with me screaming and throwing said phone.”

“Unfortunate for the phone then,” she quipped. “What did it ever do to you?”

“Connect me with useless idiots,” he replied, and she was relieved to hear that Mr. Ren had some semblance of a sense of humor. “This phone call being the exception to the rule, of course.”

“Of course,” she said, a smile tugging at her lips. 

His voice softened, becoming as gentle as she had ever heard it. “It just took so long for you to answer the phone, and you sounded so out of breath. . .,” he trailed off and she was able to figure it out the rest on her own.

“You thought I was avoiding you,” she supplied gently, and silence greeted her again. “Which is something I would never do, by the way. I know how it feels to be ignored on purpose.” A short sigh of relief could be heard.

“As do I.”

She decided to steer the conversation away from such negativity. “Are we still meeting for dinner on Tuesday?”

“Yes,” he said, his deep voice warm and rich. “The car will be there to pick you up at four.” She tilted her head in confusion as she lounged on one of the empty couches in the common room.

“Four? Isn’t that a little early to eat?”

“I do not finish work until six, Miss Jackson. You will be taken to the offices of my personal stylist, who will be outfitting you for all of our events in the foreseeable future. You must have your measurements taken. Some dresses have already been picked out for you and will need adjustments.”

That reminded her of how judgemental he had been of her clothing the night before. While she wasn’t a vain woman by anyone’s standards, she did have pride in her appearance and it hurt to know that she had come up short in his eyes. 

“Oh really?” she replied, her tone dry. “And who picked out these dresses? You?” His silence was the only answer she received and she rolled her eyes at his stubbornness. Was her sense of fashion truly so terrible? “I am ever so sorry I don't measure up to your terribly high standards, Mr. Ren.” She was being sarcastic but he sounded scandalized by her claim. 

“That is completely untrue, Miss Jackson. I clearly remember complimenting you last night at the end of the evening.” 

She bristled and gripped the phone tighter in her fist, the sting of pride once again fresh. “Yes, only after you criticized my clothing!”

“It was not a criticism,” he said briskly. “It was simply an observation and commentary. The dress was wrinkled, too loose under the arms, baggy around the waist, and there was a tear in the hem behind your right knee.”

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. The man had no tact at all whatsoever. She had pulled that dress off the rack at the Salvation Army, not Nordstrom. Her fashion sense was based on whatever was on sale at the thrift shop. “Do you even hear yourself? You could not be more blunt if you were slamming my face in with a brick.”

“I’m not sure I understand the problem,” was his flat response. 

She groaned, letting out a huge puff of breath as she thought about what to say. How did she explain basic human decency to a man who had at least ten years on her? “You could be a bit more tactful, Mr. Ren. Soften your comments so they are not as critical. Watch your tone so you don't sound judgmental. You hurt my feelings, you know.” She searched her mind for something else to say. “You need to act more like a gentleman.”

It took a few beats to respond but his tone was as dry as ever. “I have never been a gentle man, Miss Jackson. To be honest, I don't think those words have ever been used to describe me.”

She chewed on her bottom lip, not knowing what else to say. He was right, Mr. Ren didn't seem like a gentle person at all. He was more like the sea before a storm, deceptively calm until you suddenly got pulled into a maelstrom. 

But she could sense it, somehow. An underlying current of something that wanted to be gentle, that wanted to be recognized in him. Rey wanted to be the one to see it in the indomitable Kylo Ren.

“But if you claim that I have offended you in such a grievous manner, then I will try to remember to be a bit more. . .,” he hesitated. _“Tactful.”_ It sounded like the word left a nasty taste in his mouth and she had to laugh. 

“So is this going to be the exchange? You teach me how to be a big bad professional in the real world and I teach you how to talk to people?” She thought about it for a moment and it kind of made sense. In fact, it made a lot of sense. The man had the social graces of a pitbull and was actually considering the advice of a broke college kid from the streets. She might be a messy eater with trust and abandonment issues, but at least she knew how to have a pleasant conversation with someone. “Wait, Mr. Ren, is that really it?”

He seemed more than a little hesitant to admit it, but he finally did with a loud, broken sigh. “I find it extremely difficult to converse with people outside of business.” His voice dropped down to barely above a whisper and that shy thread of gentleness was all she could hear in his voice. “I've always been a competitive, ruthless person, but I find that lately my behavior has become brutal. Borderline violent. I’ve been losing clients. And,” she strained to hear what else he was saying. It was like he was afraid to say it out loud. “My boss has not been pleased with me.”

“I see,” she said softly, and it wasn't a hard scenario for her to picture. Rich, powerful, surrounded by wealth and status, but the man didn't know how to hold a simple conversation with another person without business being involved. It explained a lot about their interactions; the awkward silences, the moments where he looked like he wanted to say something, but didn't. He wasn’t being awkward on purpose, he literally did not know how to express himself in social situations. “So these events we have to go to…”

“Are a facet of my job. I must be social. Personable. I am required to make small talk and _mingle,_ ” he spit the world out with venom. “It’s maddening. I have missed out on deals, mergers, and investment opportunities because of my hesitance to engage in frivolous conversation with perfect strangers. Nothing could possibly infuriate me more, which then creates more issues at work.” He sighed deeply. “It is a vicious cycle, Miss Jackson. I want it to end.”

His explanations made her soften towards him even more as she sympathized with his problem. Some people were simply not the sociable kind, whether they were introverted or had issues with anxiety or shyness. Mr. Ren obviously struggled with this to the point where it was affecting his work. He just needed some kindness, some patience, and some empathy, just as she had assumed earlier in their phone call.

The idea danced along in her head, making her smile. This little fact made their exchange feel much more equal. It made her feel like she was actually contributing something to their relationship, and earning the money he was giving her in a proactive way. Now they they were on more even terrain with one another, she felt a whole lot better about the entire situation.

“I’ll do it!” She said enthusiastically.

“You will?” He didn't sound like he was excited at the prospect, even though it had been his idea.

“Yes! It's just like I said before. We are going to help each other, Mr. Ren. You said it yourself that we were going to benefit from each other's company. Besides, you already got through the first lesson on how not to offend people when you’re commenting on their appearance.” She chuckled, but he did not laugh in response. In fact, his voice roughened once more, the gentleness she had perceived melting away as if it had never been there. 

“And your first lesson begins on Tuesday, Miss Jackson. Do not forget. Your fitting is at four and I will meet you for dinner around six.” There was a pause before he added, “But thank you.”

“For what?”

“For lesson number one. This is the most civil conversation I have enjoyed with another in a long time.” She grinned so wide her cheeks started to hurt.

“I can only hope your first lesson is just as successful,” she said.

“Just you wait, Miss Jackson,” he said, his deep voice rumbling on the other end in a teasing matter. “It will be a lesson you will never forget.” For some reason, his tone and his words sent a shiver trailing down her spine. She didn’t know whether it was from hesitance or anticipation, and he didn’t elaborate his point further. “I will see you then.”

“Have a nice night, Mr. Ren.” The man hung up without another word.

Instead of feeling offended, Rey shrugged and slipped her phone back into the pocket of her robe. She now knew not to take his behavior too personally, since Mr. Ren was completely oblivious as to how his actions affected other people. She took a mental note as she quietly made her way back through the empty hallways and back to her dorm room. 

Maybe phone etiquette would be their second lesson.


	4. Some Kind of Monster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have never tagged a trigger warning before but I do want to warn ppl that there is a scene where Rey agrees to get tied down, so if that ain't your style, you have been warned.

The chauffeur was as punctual as he had been on Friday night when the black sedan pulled up behind Hoth Hall. Rey had dropped off her backpack and her new laptop in her dorm room after her classes had finished and was dressed in her normal clothes, a pair of baggy old blue jeans with worn out knees, and a red, threadbare tank top with a faded Mickey Mouse print on it. The entire outfit had cost her less than six bucks. 

She had not heard from Mr. Ren or his secretary in the days following Saturday's phone conversation, so she didn't bother trying to dress up for their meal. He would have ordered her to wear something fancy if he had wanted her to, she was sure of it. She had a little over two hundred and fifty dollars left over from the price of the laptop, and Rey was thoroughly planning on using that money to buy herself something nice to wear. Something new. Something that had never been owned by anyone but her.

That was what made her laptop so special. When she had bought the new computer on Sunday she had cried at the cash register when handing over the money, feeling thoroughly overwhelmed that her first purchase was so monumentally huge. When the cash register rang in at seven hundred and thirty-five dollars for the sleek new laptop and a carrying case, Rey had almost fallen into a panic attack. But Rey would never forget the feeling of the change hitting her palm, and the weight of the bag in her hand as she exited a store she had never been in before that day. She looked at every stranger as if they were a potential thief as she took the bus back to campus, clutching the bag tightly to her chest. 

It was hers, and it was new, and since she was so used to wonderful things getting ripped from her in the most terrible ways, she almost couldn't believe that something had actually gone right.

Now, two days later, she was off to meet Mr. Ren again for another meal and their first lesson. The anticipation had been building for days, and she had no clue what he had planned for her. The butterflies in her stomach flapped their wings as she was chauffeured once again to a rich neighborhood on the other side of town. This area was known for its garment district, and they pulled up in front of a brightly lit storefront that read “Dress by Ventress” as the car slowed to a stop.

She took a deep breath, feeling like she was being thrown in with the wolves. She wanted to be successful in her future, so learning the bare minimum about fashion was important, but the only thing she knew about fashion was not to mix stripes and polka dots. She knew nothing about trends or fits or cuts as she looked up at the posh selections in the window display. One of the dresses looked like it could have been worn to the Oscars. She gulped as the chauffeur opened the door for her.

He didn’t follow her inside, and a wave of intimidation was threatening to topple her as a tiny bell chimed in the open, airy boutique. The floors were a brilliantly shiny black parquet as overhead high tops illuminated the large space. Racks of blouses, skirts, and dresses were organized by color, and a velvet curtain on the opposite wall of the store was pushed aside to reveal her new stylist.

First of all, she was bald, which was what Rey noticed as the lithe woman made her way across the floor. She wore a floor-length sleeveless dress in a deep crimson, with a high neck and a large cutout on the back. The woman was an inch or two taller than Rey, but the look of superiority in her eyes made Rey feel like she was nothing but a speck of insignificant dust. It was a mere glance but it made the fire in her blood burn a little bit hotter. 

The woman could stare all she wanted. Rey’s goal was to help Mr. Ren at these high-powered, fashionable events, and she wouldn't be able to do that if she was intimidated by every person she met. Rey had spent her youth growing up around the worst slime in the planet, she wasn't about to be cowed by the one percent and their perceived superiority. 

Besides, if she could handle Mr. Ren, she could handle anyone.

Shifting her shoulders back, Rey stood up as tall as possible and kept eye contact with the stern looking woman. Mr. Ren had seen a fire in her, and today Rey decided to let a little bit of that fire out to prove that she was a woman who could take control. Nothing could intimidate Rey, not even fashion. 

“Good afternoon, I am here for a fitting. Mr. Ren sent me. My name is Rey Jackson.” The woman did a quick once over of Rey’s outfit and regarded her with an upturned lip. 

“Yes,” she replied, sounding less than impressed. “You may call me Miss Ventress.” Did first names not exist to the upper class? “He told me you would be coming. I have the dresses back here, if you’ll follow me.” 

There was a coldness to her voice that reminded her of Mr. Ren and his surly behavior. This woman was his personal stylist, and he probably preferred to surround himself with people of a similar attitude.

Rey was going to have to get used to it. Miss Ventress was only the tip of the iceberg and her first formal dinner with Mr. Ren was three days away. She was simply the first of many people Rey would have to encounter while serving as Mr. Ren’s beneficiary. 

The woman led her into a large work room filled with tables, machines, and a lighted mirror that took up the entirety of the far wall. Small changing rooms could be seen in the corner, and a short pedestal was raised before the mirror as a few seamstresses worked on alterations. Mannequins were sprinkled around the space, some nude, others decorated with dresses and outfits that could have graced the cover of Vogue.

What caught Rey’s eyes first, however, was the long-sleeved, midnight-blue gown directly in front of her, that was covered in what looked like a thousand twinkling stars. A seamstress was working on the lower hem as Rey took in the intricacies of the garment. Light shimmered off of the rhinestones decorating the silk fabric, and a low scooped back added a level of sensuality that Rey could not help but appreciate. It looked like a dress made for a queen. 

“Take off your clothes,” Miss Ventress commanded, snapping Rey’s attention from the glittering gown. “Stand on the pedestal with your arms out.”

Rey nodded dutifully and started to remove her clothing in front of the dozen or so people in the room. She refused to be intimidated as she stood in nothing but her panties and bra and climbed the two steps that elevated her above the other seamstresses.

Ventress said nothing. She went about her work dutifully, taking down every single measurement of Rey’s body. From the length of her arms to the size of her shoes, Rey’s limbs had been pulled and maneuvered and tugged into different positions that created more measurements than Rey thought was even possible. It was taking forever, but Rey refused to complain.

Then, when the tape measures finally went away, the clothing started to come out from the back closets of the work room. Rey stood there like a glorified doll as dress after dress was pulled over her head, then ripped off of her body just as quickly. She barely had a chance to look at all the clothing that was being fitted for her before it was being carted off again. What she did notice, however, was the way Ventress reacted to her fittings. The woman was critical, but she obviously knew Mr. Ren well enough to know his personal tastes in fashion.

“No!” She yelled at one of her workers as she was trying on a pink dress. “Get it off of her. It washes her out completely. And Mr. Ren hates pink.”

The afternoon continued like that for the next two hours. There was a clock on the wall that informed Rey that her six o’clock dinner appointment was quickly approaching, but there didn’t seem to be an end to the parade of clothing that Miss Ventress kept pulling from the back room. 

“Miss Ventress,” Rey called to her stylist, but the woman didn’t turn to acknowledge her. “We are getting close to six o’clock. I have to leave soon.”

The woman shook her head. “Soon enough, Miss Jackson. There is still one more dress to try.” Rey bit her lip as the clock ticked past six. She hoped that Mr. Ren would be understanding when she arrived, and forgive her for her lateness.

Who was she kidding? He was probably going to blame this all on her.

Before Rey could complain again, two seamstresses approached Rey with the midnight blue gown she had noticed when she’d entered the boutique. She snapped her mouth shut and bit down her annoyance.

Mr. Ren would have to wait. Rey wasn’t leaving without trying on this dress. 

It was a silken texture that Rey had never felt on her skin before as it slid over her arms and down her body. The bust was a bit larger than Rey's chest, but besides that, the gown draped off of Rey’s frame as if she were made to wear it. The glittering fabric made the dress look alive, and every breath she took caused the lights and colors jump off of the sparkling details and glitter on the walls around her.

“Well, well,” Miss Ventress said as she smoothed her hands down along the voluminous skirt. “I do declare that Mr. Ren has a keen eye for fashion.”

She turned to face the bald headed woman, who was staring at Rey with a knowing look. “Mr. Ren picked this dress?”

“Indeed he did,” Ventress smirked, a vicious look in her eyes. “You’re a lucky woman, Miss Jackson. You must make Mr. Ren very happy.” The insinuation under her words hit Rey like a bucket of ice water as she gaped at the personal stylist. Her lips turned up in disgust as the woman sullied her relationship with Mr. Ren. This was exactly why she hadn't told her friends the truth, now she had to experience judgement from complete strangers? She started to shake her head quickly as a churning sensation roiled her gut. 

“No, no, it’s not like that at all,” Rey tried to explain, but Miss Ventress held up a hand and cut her off.

“No need to explain, Miss Jackson. You’re not the first girl to come in here and shop under another man’s tab.” 

Rey balked, the color draining from her face. As handsome and successful as Mr. Ren was, Rey had to remember that the man wanted nothing to do with sex as far as she was concerned. He’d had multiple attempts to proposition her over the past few days, and still seemed offended any time Rey brought up the idea that his motives might not be so pure.

Besides, Rey’s sex life was completely nonexistent. She knew all about it, of course, from school and books and the internet, but she had never experienced any of those feelings or emotions. After a hard life spent basically raising herself, the only crush she’d ever had was on the boys from One Direction. She’d never had a boyfriend, she’d never even been kissed before. She didn't even really know what a crush, what romantic love, felt like. She was too busy trying to make ends meet or get an education to care about silly things like a boyfriend. 

Now she was basically being compared to a whore, or a kept, spoiled woman. As if Mr Ren were a pimp or a. . . a. . . 

She didn't want to even think it, but the words popped up in her head anyways.

_Sugar Daddy._

_Mr. Ren is NOT my sugar daddy._

“Well, then don’t ring it up under his tab. Create a billing for me.” She pointed towards her wallet in her handbag. “I have almost three hundred dollars on me, I’ll pay for this myself.” Miss Ventress laughed in her face.

“Three hundred dollars? My goodness, don't be ridiculous, child, the dress you have on is worth more than three thousand.”

Three thousand dollars. For one dress. It was more than the cost of the payment plan on her tuition. Add that to the thousand dollars he’d given her for her laptop, and the other clothing he wanted to buy her. . .

No wonder Miss Ventress thought she and Mr. Ren were having some kind of affair. No man spent this kind of money on a woman without getting something in return.

But we have an arrangement, she thought to herself. Who cared if nobody understood it but her?

“I need to leave,” she said firmly as she looked at the clock and blanched at the time. She should have met Mr. Ren for dinner at least fifteen minutes ago and she still needed to change back into her clothes. “Mr. Ren is waiting for me, and he is not a patient man.”

“No, he is not,” was the deep and familiar reply from behind her. She was too afraid to turn around and see the look of annoyance in the dark gaze of Kylo Ren. “Miss Ventress,” he greeted his stylist. “I take it the fitting went late.”

“Yes, I am sorry, sir. We were just about to finish up now. Will you meet me up front so we can discuss things?” Miss Ventress left the room as the seamstresses continued to work. No one came to take the dress off of Rey, and she was too afraid to touch the material in case she pulled one of the pins out of her alterations. 

Mr. Ren was still behind her, and she took a deep breath before turning around and facing him. A bright red tie stood out against a crisp black suit, and once again his hair was slicked back away from his face. His gaze was critical and his eyes were hooded as he greeted her.

“Miss Jackson.”

“Good evening, Mr. Ren.” 

“Have you been enjoying yourself?” Rey shrugged. 

“I didn’t have to do much besides lift up my arms, but yes. The clothing is beautiful.” She knew better not to thank him, remembering her last attempt at gratitude. She turned to the mirror to look at herself once more. She could see Mr. Ren looming behind her shoulder, and the feeling of his eyes on her frame made her pulse spike in the oddest way. She watched as his eyes slowly trailed down the exposed back of her dress to rest on her behind before lifting up and meeting her eyes once more. 

Was he. . . Was Mr. Ren checking her out?

A blush warmed her face and she noticed a pink tint to his cheek bones. “Yes, this dress looks exactly as I had hoped.” An intense look entered his gaze that Rey didn't, couldn't, understand. It was so powerful she had to look away. It was doing things to her, making her feel things about Mr. Ren that she hadn't felt before now. Stupid Miss Ventress and her stupid comments about her stupid not-a-sugar-daddy. She quickly stepped off the pedestal and past Mr. Ren, heading for an empty dressing room and trying to stop the fluttering feeling in her chest from overwhelming her completely.

“I’ll need a few minutes to get changed,” she said, wondering why she sounded so breathless. Her heart was racing as he continued to stare at her. 

“I will meet you in the front,” he said softly as he left the work room. The only sound that Rey could hear was the whirr of the sewing machines and the thumping of her heart as another seamstress came over to help her out of the exquisite dress.

When she was alone, she slumped her body against the bare wall with a groan. What was wrong with her? Why was her heart beating so fast? Why wouldn’t this stupid blush go away? 

And why couldn’t she stop thinking about Mr. Ren checking her out?

She sighed deeply as she threw back on her ratty old clothes. The fabric felt like burlap on her skin in comparison to the luxurious fabrics that she had tried on all afternoon. The look on Mr. Ren’s face when he had appraised her in the dress made her arms erupt in goose pimples and she had to suppress a small shiver. He really was the most intriguing man, attractive in the oddest ways. His angular nose, the cut of his strong jaw, the dozens of birthmarks scattered along his cheeks. And every time he looked at her his mahogany eyes were so intense. . .

No, she said to herself as she knocked her head into the wall with a low thump. She had to stop thinking of her benefactor in such a way. His generosity was an investment, and their arrangement was meant to be mutually beneficial. They were to help one another become the best versions of themselves. That was the extent of their relationship. He had made that clear on Day One.

Whatever random feelings she was currently having for her benefactor were unwanted and unwelcome at this very moment. He was waiting for her in the next room, and she still had to sit through an entire meal with him.

Including lesson number one. 

So she took a deep breath and locked away any soft feelings of attraction she was having towards Mr. Ren. They would do her no good now, or in the long run, she was sure of it.

Rey walked into the front of the boutique and gave her thanks to the cold Miss Ventress for all of the work she had put into her wardrobe. Her attitude might not be pleasant, but Rey had just tried on some of the most exquisite clothing in all of Corellia. The woman nodded her goodbye while Mr. Ren placed a hand on the small of Rey’s back and quietly lead her out of the store. Instead of a black sedan, Rey saw a black BMW convertible with the top down, sitting idle in front of the boutique. She squinted up at him as the late afternoon sun hit her face.

“Where’s my driver?” Mr. Ren opened the passenger’s side door for her as she slipped into the leather seats.

“I sent Mr. Rook home. He will be picking you up later this evening.”

“Where are we going?” She asked, wondering what restaurant he was bringing her to. He didn’t look at her while he answered, shifting the car into gear.

“We are dining in this evening, Miss Jackson.”

“In?” She repeated, her voice cracking. “You mean. . .”

“Yes,” he said, as he pulled the luxury vehicle onto the road. “We are going to my apartment tonight.”

Rey didn’t know how to respond to that information. And she didn't know how to stop the butterflies from flapping their wings in her belly.

“Why?” She asked, and his cheek lifted in a rough approximation of a grin. 

“Because our lesson requires time, patience, and an area that can be easily cleaned.” Her jaw dropped in an expression of complete and utter shock that he steadfastly ignored. What could their lesson possibly entail?

“What are you planning-,” he cut her off before she could express her concerns. His voice dropped down an octave into dangerous territory. 

“Ventress told me what you did, Miss Jackson.” 

She shook her head in confusion. “What?”

“She told me you tried to pay for your clothing,” they paused at a red light and Mr. Ren finally turned to look at her again. The expression on his face was not a happy one. “That you tried to give her three hundred dollars.”

“I didn’t,” she pinched the bridge of her nose with a sigh. “I didn’t give her anything. I told her I had some money and to make me my own tab.”

His words were clipped and angry. “Why did you do that?”

“Because,” she started to say, but trailed off as she avoided eye contact. “She said something that made me uncomfortable.”

“Explain.” It wasn’t a request. 

“I-I don't know. It’s stupid.” His expression brokered no argument. He wanted to know. She sighed deeply. 

“She said something about our relationship. That I was a ‘lucky woman,’” she couldn’t suppress the shudder that snaked through her. “It made everything about this feel . . .wrong. Dirty.”

“Wrong.” He echoed. His voice sounded hollow. “Dirty.” The light turned green and they were driving again.

Her fingers twisted around each other tightly. She wasn’t explaining herself correctly and Mr. Ren wasn't looking at her. She couldn't gauge his reactions. “N-no, that’s not what I-”

He cut her off unceremoniously, finality clear in his tone. “There is no need to explain yourself, Miss Jackson.” 

“Yes there is!” She emphasized, stomping her foot as Mr. Ren glanced at her from the corner of his eye. His brow was turned up in surprise at her outburst. “Let me speak, dammit!”

She watched a slow, predatory smile turn up his lips into a grin that sent shivers up her spine. It reminded her of his gaze in the mirror when he had checked her out. “Then speak.” 

“I don’t like insinuations that we are having some kind of illicit affair or something, when you yourself have made it perfectly clear that our relationship is one of business,” she said, her eyes on his face for any bit of a reaction. His features were schooled, however, and she couldn’t be sure of his feelings. “Which is how she made me feel. And it made me uncomfortable,” she sighed deeply, not wanting to think about the reasons why it made her uncomfortable. “I mean, the money was yours anyway. It’s what was left over from buying my laptop.”

“But it was intended for you, Miss Jackson. I thought that by now you would have bought a completely new wardrobe. But apparently I was mistaken,” he grumbled that last comment under his breath.

“Oi!” She yelled, feeling indignant. “What did we talk about on Saturday night?”

For a moment the man almost looked bashful. “Don’t insult the way people dress.”

“And?”

He sighed deeply and she had to stifle a small chuckle at the look of contrition on his face. 

“I apologize,” he said lowly. “I guess I need more practice before Friday night.”

“I should hope so,” Rey agreed as they turned into a parking garage for a large apartment complex in the business district of town. She got out of the car after he parked in his reserved spot and made their way toward the elevator. Rey stood next to Mr. Ren as he punched in a special key code that took them to the top floor.

“Welcome, Miss Jackson,” Mr. Ren said as he led her into his apartment. Rey had to stop herself from gasping out loud. The entire far wall of the apartment was nothing but large, tall glass windows that reached from the floor to the ceiling. They had to be at least twenty floors up by the panoramic view laid out before her. 

His kitchen, dining room, and living room were spread out in an open-floor plan that allowed Rey the chance to walk around and get to know the space more intimately. His sofa and loveseat were black leather, and all of his appliances were the darkest silvers and blacks, all detailed with chrome. Silver walls with angular red accents made the space look like a postmodern masterpiece. 

The table was already set for two people. She could see takeout containers with the name of her favorite Thai restaurant etched along the side and was excited to finally eat something. She hadn’t had anything to eat in hours and the fitting had taken a lot of energy out of her.

“How did you know I liked Thai food?” She asked him as he handed her a cold aluminum can. She was pleased to see it was a ginger ale. Mr. Ren was drinking a glass of deep red wine.

“I didn’t, Miss Jackson. I chose Thai food for a very specific reason.”

“Which is?”

“Are you afraid of me, Miss Jackson?” His sudden question caught her off guard as she placed her ginger ale on the table next to her place setting. 

“Why? Should I be?” He shrugged his shoulders.

“Many people are. Most are afraid to speak to me the way you did in the car. The others avoid me altogether.”

“Are you some kind of a monster or something?” A flash of emotion crossed his features, making him look almost pitiable as they stood alone in the spacious apartment. 

“So I’ve been told.” He mused. "That, or an irredeemable asshole."

She didn’t know what to say to that. What could Mr. Ren have done for people to call him a monster straight to his face? Was he really so terrible a person? He had never given her any reason to think he was anything else.

“Well, I’m not afraid of anything,” she said, pulling back her shoulders and puffing out her chest with bravado. Mr. Ren squinted his eyes at her as his voice turned bitter.

“You’re lying,” he accused.

“I know,” she replied, refusing to break eye contact with him. Rey was terrified of the things in her life that she couldn’t control. Hunger, homelessness, poverty; these were the things that struck true fear into the heart of Rey Jackson. “But I’m definitely not afraid of you.”

His eyes darkened, to the point where she thought she might have to take a step back away from the volatile Mr. Ren.

“We’ll see,” he said, and Rey’s blood drained from her face when he reached up to untie the crimson fabric that was wrapped around his neck. “Sit down, Miss Jackson.”

“Um,” she said, her voice shaking as she took a few steps away from the table. He popped open the top buttons of his collar. “W-What are you doing?” 

“Getting ready for lesson one,” he said simply as the long red fabric came loose and dropped into his palm. He held it taut between two hands and started walking towards her. “Please sit down now.”

“I-I don’t think this is a good idea,” she said, walking backwards and trying not to hit into any of her furniture. 

“I thought you just said you were afraid of nothing, Miss Jackson,” his voice was deep and dark and as playful as she had ever heard it. “Please don’t tell me you’re no longer up to the challenge. I would hate to discover that you’re really a chicken.”

Their eyes met over the long black sofa and Rey’s nostrils flared in anger. She could see a bit of that monster in him now, toying with her, tempting her to show her fear. Oh, she was going to prove herself to this man. She was going to show him that she had stopped fearing monsters long ago.

Then she was going to show him exactly where to shove that tie when this so-called lesson was over.

“Fine,” she grit her teeth as made her way towards the table, looking at nothing but her place setting. She didn’t want to see the look of satisfaction on Mr. Ren’s face. She sat down on the chair and rested her arms on the sides. “Do your worst, Mr. Ren.”

Rey watched as Mr. Ren approached the table with the tie still gripped in his hands. His gaze was focused on his task as he started to wrap the red tie around her chest and the back of the chair, keeping her sitting up straight yet unable to lean forward. Her arms were free, but she could only move them so far in front of herself before the tie hindered her movement. She tried to ignore the feeling of Mr. Ren’s hands pressing the fabric against her skin, and the masculine smell of his cologne while he leaned over her to tie a knot in the fabric, keeping her in place. A slow ache started to build in her abdomen as she rubbed her legs together subconsciously. It was a new, tingling sensation she had never felt before. 

“There,” he stepped back, admiring his handiwork as he sat down across from her at his place setting. “Now the lesson can begin.”

“And what is the lesson?” She questioned with a sneer. “BDSM basics?”

A small cough choked out of him but he pretended to ignore her comment. “Proper table manners is going to be the benchmark of all of our future events, and you much conquer the basic rules before Friday.”

She shook her head, silently seething as humiliation coursed through her. “You mean, this whole thing is a lesson in table etiquette?”

“Precisely,” was his scant response.

“You know, Mr. Ren. I think I’m genuinely beginning to hate you.”

“Just now? I think five days might be a record, most people start hating me immediately.”

“I can see why,” she retorted, the sting of her pride still acidic. “You really are a monster.”

“Yes I am,” he agreed and pointed toward the food. “But to make it easier, at least I gave you a fork instead of chopsticks.”

“How generous of you,” she sneered while he filled her plate with different kinds of foods from all the takeout containers.

“This is your challenge. You are to sit with your shoulders and back firmly against the chair and eat the food I am serving without making a mess. You may not lean forward or slouch. You cannot use your hands to eat instead of utensils. Your elbows must stay off the table.” His instructions were firm and clear, but Rey could see a shadow of amusement in his gaze and wanted to slap the haughty expression off of his face. “Are we clear?”

“Crystal,” she basically snarled.

“Then bon appetit, Miss Jackson.” Without another word, the two quietly began their meal. Rey could reach the fork and knife, but manipulating it without the ability to move forward was incredibly difficult. It was working though, slowly, and she ate in a precise, methodical way that limited the amount of crumbs that dropped on her lap. She could see Mr. Ren taking turns between eating and watching Rey’s progress, but the man said nothing and offered no commentary. Rey was more focused on not dropping anything from her fork than starting a conversation.

She could see why he had chosen Thai food. The rice and noodles were incredibly difficult to keep on her fork, and the curry sauce dripped off of her spoon and into the lap of her ratty old jeans. She could also see why they hadn’t done this at a restaurant, and for that Rey was grateful. If Mr. Ren were truly a monster he would have subjected her to this in a public setting.

She didn't want to admit it, but the lesson was helping her in little ways. It was getting easier and easier to eat as her muscles got used to a slower, more refined way of eating. By slowing down and chewing more, she was able to enjoy the food better and eat more throughout. She also didn't get a stomachache from eating too much, too quickly, which often happened to her.

By the end of the meal, Rey’s lap was a mess of rice and curry sauce. Her neck and back were killing her from the pressure of being held against the chair, and her tank top was covered in dried up pieces of Pad Thai noodles.

But she had made it through the meal. She had shown Kylo Ren that she was not a woman who could be easily intimidated, even if it meant sacrificing a bit of dignity and some old clothes. 

She was going to be buying new ones soon anyway.

Mr. Ren stood up from his place setting and approached Rey’s chair. He looked at the mess on her lap and the bits of food on the floor and made a small noise of disapproval. “Your attempts were adequate, but try to practice again before Friday. It’s a more intimate dinner, so I would hate for anything to draw any unwanted attention to you, Miss Jackson.”

“Fine,” she grit through her teeth, just wanting the night to be over. She knew she was earning money for all of this, but the lesson left her feeling demeaned and furious. She just wanted to go back to her dorm room, fall into her bed and try to forget one of the most ridiculous nights of her life.

But with gentle fingers, he lifted up her chin so their eyes met, and her mouth went dry from the look of gratitude on his face. “I might be a poor imitation of a gentleman, but I am very happy that you will be there with me on Friday.” A long, timid finger caressed the left side of her jaw before falling away. Rey was stunned. No one had ever touched her like that before, in such a gentle, intimate way, and it was over so quickly that Rey could hardly even enjoy it.

“I know you are apprehensive of our dinner, and you feel like you will not fit in,” he sighed deeply and Rey couldn’t look away from the swirling browns of his eyes. “I wanted to do this to challenge you, Rey, not to antagonize you. I thought that if you could get through this bastardization of a lesson, you could get through the real thing without a second thought, since no one will be threatening to tie you down.” He broke eye contact with her and started to untie the red silk keeping her bound. “I’m sorry if it merely served as a confirmation of my villainy.”

She was freed as the loose fabric pooled at her feet. His explanation made a bit of sense, but she was still angry with him. The feeling would pass, however. His had been a lesson in strength-of-character, and Rey was not a prideful person. She would get over the sting and show him that she could be as powerful and unflappable as he could be. 

“Mr. Rook will be picking you up at five pm on Friday evening. You will be brought to Miss Ventress’ shop where she and her team will outfit you with your attire, hair and makeup. I will be there at seven to pick you up.” He held out a hand to help lift her up out of her seat. Her neck was a bit sore, and her back made a creak of protest, but she gratefully took his hand as he helped her to stand. For a moment, he looked nervous as he rubbed the back of his neck. “That is, unless the big bad monster has scared you off.”

“I told you I wasn’t afraid of anything,” she said, calm and even and expressing no emotion, just like him.

“So you did,” was his warm response. He ran a hand through his hair, distressing the locks in a haphazard way. It instantly made him look more relaxed and carefree, melting years from his severe face. Add that to the missing tie and open shirt collar, and Mr. Ren looked as casual as she had ever seen him. “And you have thoroughly conquered my trial of wills. The fact that you have not punched me yet is a success in itself.”

She had to laugh, and was surprise to see the shadow of a smile on his lips as they stood in contented silence. 

“Don't count it out completely yet, Mr. Ren. I have a mean right hook.”

“I am sure you do, Miss Jackson.” His phone rang, and the lighthearted tone in his voice was gone in a flash as he answered it with a gruff, “What?” He hung up the phone without saying anything else.

“Your car is here,” he said, and he didn't sound too happy about it. She kind of wished their night would last a bit longer as well.

“Really?” She asked, and he looked shocked to hear the disappointment in her tone. 

“Um, yes, well, I have a conference call with Tokyo soon and I had made the arrangement with Rook earlier this afternoon.”

She nodded, fully understanding the demands of the job. “Then I will see you on Friday.”

“Friday,” he repeated, and ran his hand through his hair once more. He walked her towards the elevator and hit the button before passing over a familiar looking envelope. She didn’t want to take it from him.

“Mr. Ren,” she started to say, feeling more than a little hesitant, but he shook his head.

“It’s to replace your outfit. It was ruined because of me and-,” this time Rey did the interrupting. 

“You floss your teeth with the amount this outfit cost me, I’m sure of it.”

“Nonetheless,” he continued, “I want you to buy a completely new wardrobe, and three hundred dollars will not cover it.”

“But what about the clothes I tried on today?!” 

“Those are for special occasions only. You will not be storing them anywhere else but Ventress’ studio. This is for your everyday wear,” he passed her the envelope and she reluctantly grabbed it, but he still held onto it tightly as his energy shifted. The look in his eyes was adamant. “And if I see that you kept even a single solitary _sock_ , I will go to your dorm room and look through every drawer until I find every old item and dispose of them myself.”

The thought that popped into her mind scandalized her so badly she felt like she had been electrocuted as her neurons fired off chemical signals she had never felt before. Her pulse spiked as that ache from earlier returned, burning a little hotter. She was starting to figure out what that feeling meant. Rey grabbed the envelope out of his hand and pointed at him with her free one. “Keep your hands and your thoughts out of my drawers!”

She didn't know what had possessed her to say that, but thankfully the elevator had arrived to save her from the look of absolute horror on Mr. Ren’s face. She ran into it like the apartment was on fire and slammed her palm on the Close Door button repeatedly as her heart slammed against her chest.

“Good night!” She said with a huff, and his open-mouthed look of utter confusion was the last thing she saw before the elevator doors closed in his face. She backed up into the far wall of the elevator and slid to the ground as she buried her face in her dirty lap and let out a strange mix between a giggle and a sob. The night had been such a roller-coaster of emotions, she didn't know how else to react. Mr. Ren was making her feel things that she had never felt before, things she was afraid to admit and name for herself.

Rey giggle-sobbed in the back of Mr. Rook’s car the entire way back to campus while counting the money over and over again to make sure the sum was correct. 

She now had another thousand dollars to make sure her drawers were to Mr. Ren’s liking.


	5. Verbal Sparring

“Oh, do it again, Rey! Twirl for me!” Rose clapped from the bed as Rey blushed deeply. She shook her head and stood with her hands on her hips in the middle of her dorm room, facing down her tiny roommate.

“Rose, I can’t do this forever, I have to get ready!” She exclaimed, taking a glance at the clock. Mr. Rook was scheduled to arrive in less than a half an hour, and while she was going to be outfitted for the evening at Ventress’ studio, she needed to mentally prepare herself for the night ahead of her. “I have to go soon, I dont have time for a personal fashion show. Besides,” she added, checking out the hunter green open-shoulder dress she had bought at Macy’s and not truly believing it was hers, “you were with me when I bought all of it.”

“I know, but I just can't help but be excited for you!” Rose said, literally vibrating with joy as she sat cross-legged and hugged a pillow to her chest. “Sure, I've gotten hand-me-downs from my sister Paige before, but you've only ever shopped at, like, thrift stores and Goodwill and stuff. This is the kind of shopping spree every girl dreams of!”

Rey hated to admit it, but Rose was right. Humoring her friend, she twirled around a few more times with a giggle as Rose clapped and hooted her appreciation.

The roommates had spent the entirety of Wednesday evening and Thursday afternoon at the mall buying more clothes than Rey had ever owned in her life. Rose had been her shopping guru from beginning to end, making a detailed list of everything Rey needed to create a complete and well-rounded wardrobe. She had a sneaking suspicion that Rose had enjoyed herself more than Rey did, since shopping had always been a stressful affair.

But it had been a necessary trip, and Rey would have been lost without Rose, her methodical lists, and her subtly sophisticated fashion sense. Mr. Ren was expecting nothing short of the best, and Rey knew she had to deliver or else. . .

Well, she didn't want to think about the threat that Mr. Ren had leveled at her a few days ago, whether it had been idle or serious. A lingering thread of embarrassment still plagued her every time she thought about Tuesday night's dinner debacle. His twisted attempt at a lesson, her embarrassing outburst… she wished that she could hit the rewind button and do the entire night all over again. 

Now, three days later, she was getting ready to go through it once more. This would be her first scheduled event as Mr. Ren’s companion, and her goal was to make sure that he was personable, stayed calm throughout the evening, and didn't offend anyone.

Rey was pretty sure she had her work cut out for her. Mr. Ren had shown his true colors to her on Tuesday night; callous and condescending and shockingly blunt. A monster and an irredeemable asshole, in his very own words.

So why was she so excited to see him tonight? Why couldn't she stop thinking about the gratitude in his eyes and the soft touch of his fingertip on her jaw? 

Rey looked at the green dress in the mirror once more and decided to wear it to Ventress’ boutique. Part of her wanted to show the stuck up stylist that she was in possession of a little bit of fashion sense, even if Rose had helped her pick it out. Another part of her simply felt good in the dress; beautiful and stylish and chic. It was something she had never felt before, besides those scant hours spent trying on clothes in Ventress’ shop. 

The clock informed her that Mr. Rook would be arriving in ten minutes and she slipped on a pair of strappy beige wedges that added another two inches to her slim frame. 

Rose squealed as Rey reached for her matching beige clutch. “Oh, you look so glamorous, Rey!” If only Rose could see the clothing she had tried on earlier in the week. “What time will you be home?”

Rey was sticking to her plan of staying as close to the truth as possible while changing around some of the details to fit her cover story. “I shouldn't be that late, it's just a small dinner to welcome me into the program.” She went over to Rose and gave her tiny roommate a hug. “Don't wait up for me,” she joked.

“Don't come in if there's a sock on the door,” Rose snarked, mentioning their secret code if Rose was having Finn over. 

Rey rolled her eyes. She couldn't make jokes about Rose’s sex life, the fact that Rey was a virgin was a joke in and of itself. “See you later.” She made her way out of the building and into the parking lot where her chauffeur was already waiting for her with the door open. She said thank you as he closed it behind her and drove into the heart of Corellia.

The boutique was still opened for business, but Ventress immediately brought her into the back work room where multiple outfits were already prepared on mannequins. Some of the seamstresses were hard at work on their own projects while two assistants stood to the side and waited for further instruction. 

However, Ventress was not barking out any orders or doling out directions. She was staring at Rey and giving her outfit a once-over.

“The dress,” Ventress said, finally looking up at Rey. She didn't offer any other details and Rey was already annoyed with the woman’s cold behavior.

“Yes, what about it?”

“It’s lovely,” she remarked, sounding shocked to admit it out loud. “Ren led me to believe that you did not own clothing so fine.”

 _That asshole. . ._

“Well I didn't, before now. This is a newly acquired purchase,” she said, trying to sound as haughty and snobbish as Ventress always did. The stylist nodded but didn't offer up any other commentary before the commands began. She snapped her fingers at her assistants and the two women came rushing forward.

“Get her out of the dress and into a robe. Send her to makeup first. I want a fresh, clean look. Light on the eyes, and not too heavy on the brows or lashes. Go!” With that, Rey rescinded her right to personal space and was now in the literal hands of Ventress’ assistants. They carefully stripped her of her new favorite dress and hung it up on a hanger before wrapping her in a plush terry cloth robe and sending her over to the makeup table.

The women fussed over her for what seemed like hours, poking and prodding at every section of her face and hair. There were so many people surrounding her, she couldn’t even see herself in the mirror until the sea of bodies parted ways around her and gave her a chance to look. They had done a good job of highlighting and contouring all of her features in a soft and youthful way. Her hair was set in a delicate twist that left her neck bare as wispy bangs fell around the sides of her face.

After she was finished with her makeup, she was led to the center pedestal, and there were now three mannequins presented in front of her for Ventress to make her final decision. She could remember each of the outfits from the other day. One was a cream-colored silk blouse with a pussycat bow and a burgundy pencil skirt. The second was a black, tailored suit-jacket and pants with a soft lavender shell. The third was a soft yellow wrap-dress with a lacy trim around the neck and lower hem. The assistants removed her robe and had her try on all three outfits for Miss Ventress.

Ventress hated every single one of them.

“Get her out of it,” she said angrily, after staring at the third outfit for what seemed like forever. “Bring back the dress she wore into the store.” A burst of pride shot through her when the assistants retrieved her dress and slipped it back over her head. Miss Ventress made a few adjustments to the garment, then stepped back to admire the final product.

“Yes, Miss Jackson. A lovely dress indeed,” was the last thing she said before the curtain to the workroom pulled back and Mr. Ren entered the space. Their eyes met from across the room and she had to do a double take.

He looked so different as he made his way towards her. There was a small box in his hand that he was clutching as if his life depended on it as her eyes trailed up to take in the entirety of his six-foot-plus frame. The first thing she noticed was that he wasn’t wearing a suit. Instead, he had on a deep burgundy sweater with the sleeves rolled up over muscular forearms. He paired it with dark denim jeans and black loafers. His jet black hair, which he normally kept slicked back and out of his face, was completely free of product and framing his angular jaw in the most attractive way. She almost envied him for how soft and voluminous his locks looked. She knew girls who would kill to have hair like Mr. Ren.

He stood in front of her, but standing on her pedestal they were at eye level. Neither one said a word of greeting or made any friendly gestures toward one another until Mr. Ren finally broke the silence.

“Miss Jackson,” he said with a nod.

“Mr. Ren,” she supplied in return. She knew he was terrible at small talk and part of her wanted to get some payback and torture him by prolonging this awkward silence. Rey knew, however, that this night was important to him and didn't want to start it off on the wrong foot. “I hope you are well.”

He hummed a halfhearted response. “Quite,” he waved Ventress over and pointed to the dress Rey was wearing. “What happened to the outfit selections you had presented me with earlier today? This dress was not on it.” Rey couldn't tell if Mr. Ren was angry or simply curious.

Ventress stood as tall as possible and addressed her client with a business-like tone. “This dress belongs to Miss Jackson, sir. When compared to the other options, I thought this was the optimal choice for the occasion.”

Mr. Ren turned to look back at Rey with a raised brow and a critical eye. She could feel his eyes trail down her body as she stood firm and proud, never letting him see how nervous he made her. She was mentally preparing herself for whatever insults or comments he was about to throw at her.

But those comments never came. Instead came a round of questions. “You bought this?” He asked.

“Yes.”

“Where?”

“Macy's.”

“How much was it?”

“$109.99,” she repeated from memory, remembering every penny she had spent over the last few days. “Plus tax, because America is stupid.”

His eyes narrowed, almost as if he didn't want to believe her. Being held under his scrutiny was making her skin itch and she was waiting for him to rip her apart for daring to wear her own clothing to one of his events, or for attempting to blind him with her horrid sense of fashion.

“It brings out the colors of your eyes,” he muttered, his low voice barely reaching her. He looked shocked to have said it out loud. “Put these on,” he said gruffly, shoving the box in her hands. He turned away from her and crossed his arms over his chest as she opened the velvet box with a gasp.

The large, brilliant diamond solitaires sat nestled in their silken grooves as Rey gazed down at the most gorgeous earrings she had ever seen. Light reflected off of them in shimmering rainbows of color as her eyes followed all of the twinkling facets. Inside the box, a small inscription was written in golden calligraphy, the letters large, loopy and ornate as she read them. 

_LOS._

Who was LOS?

She didn't have a chance to ask him before he spoke once more. “You will return them to me at the end of the evening. They are borrowed and must be returned to their owner immediately following dinner.” He turned back towards her but she kept staring at the precious stones in her hands, completely mesmerized by the colors and the shimmering lights. She didn’t even want to try to guess their value. 

“What is it?” He asked and she still didn't respond. His voice softened to something infinitely more gentle and it startled her back into the present. 

“Rey?” He said, and she looked up as he spoke her given name. He had said it maybe once or twice before, but never with such tenderness. “Is something wrong?” 

“I’ve never seen a diamond before,” she admitted quietly as her hand trembled slightly. “They’re beautiful, but I don't think you should trust me with them. What if I lose them?” She whispered that last part, too afraid to say it out loud.

A large, warm palm covered her shaking hand as she looked up at her benefactor with fear in her eyes. His gaze was steady, and firm, with a current of understanding threaded through it that started to calm her nerves.

“There is not a single person I would rather trust these diamonds with, Rey. I want you to wear them. I even asked someone's permission for them this evening, something I rarely ever do.” A small crack of a smile lifted the corners of his lips, which made her worries ease away instantly. He took the velvet box from her and handed it to one of the assistants on standby. “Besides, they're insured. Put them on and I'll be waiting in the car.”

Insured? For how much?! She didn’t have a chance to ask him as she was left alone once more.

The assistant helped her put on the earrings and also helped her choose a necklace and bracelet to match. Five minutes later, she was sitting in the front seat of Mr. Ren’s BMW, making their way out of the city and towards the suburbs, closer to where she lived on campus. He had the top up so her hair wouldn’t become disheveled. 

She fidgeted nervously in her leather seat. Mr. Ren hadn’t said anything since leaving the shop and she was wondering how the night would unfold.

“So,” she said, reaching for something to discuss. “Have you been practicing?”

He turned to her for a moment, confusion clear on his strong brow. “Practicing?”

“Yes,” she continued dryly. “Your small talk. Your attempts to not offend people when you open up your mouth.”

He scoffed, turning up his lip. “Small talk serves no purpose but to fill up time and space with frivolity. It is pointless to try and practice.” He let out a large sigh, sounding more stressed than she had ever heard him. “Besides, at this event it’s not the small talk I have a problem with.”

She tilted her head in confusion. “Why? Where are we going?”

“We are going to a celebratory birthday dinner at an associate’s apartment. It’s an intimate affair, less than ten guests total. I work with them all.” He hesitated before speaking once more. “Hux has been a friend of mine for years, but he is angry with me. He almost rescinded my invitation, but I asked that he reconsider. He did, and here we are.”

She digested that bit of information with a nod. “I see, and why is Hux angry with you?” Ren gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles were white, but kept speaking. He was rarely this open with her and she clung onto every word.

“We were partnered together to negotiate the terms of a new contract with an important client and talks fell through. I lost my temper and,” he paused, peeking over at Rey before turning his attention back toward the road. “Smashed my fist through a pane of glass.”

“I see.”

“The glass was the partition for his office.”

“Ah.”

“We lost the client.”

“Uh-huh.”

“And he reported me to HR.”

“Okay,” she said, noticing just how tense he truly was. He looked ready to snap at any second. “And you still wanted to go to the event?”

Once again, his grip tightened to the point where she thought he might rip the steering wheel off of it’s column completely. “Like I mentioned earlier, Miss Jackson. Hux is one of my oldest friends, and it is not easy for me to talk to people. I want this issue resolved so things can be normal again. I am not sure how to bridge the gap between us, hence the reason why you are here.”

“Well,” she thought to herself, trying to think about the situation at hand. “What does Hux like?”

“What?”

“You’ve known him for years. What does he like to do? What are his interests? What do you guys like to do together for fun?”

“For fun?” He repeated, sounding confused. “I wasn’t aware that Hux knew what fun was.”

“Do you?” She accused with incredulity. He shot her a scathing look in return.

“It depends on your definition,” he said dryly. Rey sent him a knowing look and he basically snarled. “I don’t know! He has a cat, that I know for sure.”

“Okay, that’s something. . . “

“No, something would be an adequate enough apology to dismiss ten thousand dollars worth of construction and the loss of a 3.5 million dollar contract.”

She shrugged her shoulders. “Mr. Ren, you are paying me too much. I’ve got nothing.”

“I am coming to realize this.”

“I think you should lead in with the whole cat thing though,” she added thoughtfully, ignoring his sarcasm. He turned to stare at her like she had five heads. 

“What?”

“People love their pets. Lead in with his cat so he knows that you care. Even if it’s something as trivial as an animal, people like when you remember things about them. People like it even more if you ask questions. It will let Hux know that you’ve still been thinking of him despite your problems at work.”

Ren mulled over her advice for a few moments, but neither agreed or disagreed. “I will keep that in mind. Anything else?”

“Um, say that you’re sorry, for one. Have you even done that yet?”

He had the gall to look offended. “I did so! During our conflict resolution sessions with HR, I said that I regretted my behavior.”

“Yeah, because you were being forced to say it, Mr. Ren,” she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. Mr. Ren was truly and utterly clueless when it came to socializing with others. She had met Kindergarteners with more social savvy than him. “He has to know the apology comes from the heart and not something you were being told to do.”

A sneer pulled up his lip and he looked at her with an air of superiority that she wanted to smack off of his face. “So you're telling me I put out thousands of dollars of my hard-earned money just for you to tell me to say I’m sorry to a man I have known for the better part of a decade?”

She shrugged and leaned back into the leather seats. Just to mess with him, she stretched her arms and placed them behind her head in a smug manner. “I don’t know, Mr. Ren, you should hire an accountant or something. You seem rather reckless with your money.” He didn’t say anything else, but she could have sworn that she had heard a small huff that could have been mistaken for a laugh as they approached the gated community of condominiums not too far from campus.

Mr. Ren had to show identification at the gate to be allowed in. Every single building looked as identical as the one next to it as they drove through the quiet, clean neighborhood. Mr. Ren parked his car in front of a row of apartments and walked to the other side of the car to help Rey out. He placed a hand on the small of her back like he usually did to lead her straight up to the front door.

She watched as Mr. Ren pressed the doorbell with shaky fingers. Rey wished there was some way to console him, to let him know that she was going to be by his side throughout the night no matter how surly or antisocial he became. This was her job, and she was going to do everything in her power to make sure Mr. Ren apologized to his friend on his birthday. That was the last thought she had before a ridiculously tall blonde woman answered the door, looking more than a little shocked to see her newest guests on her doorstep.

“Ren!” She gasped, holding a champagne flute in her left hand while opening the door with her right. Stunned blue eyes barely glanced over Rey before they moved back onto her benefactor. The woman had to push her wispy blonde bangs out of her face as she tucked her neat bob behind an ear. “We didn’t think you were coming,” she added, a bit breathlessly. She didn’t seem offended or angry at their presence, just merely surprised.

Mr. Ren, however, looked like he wanted to bolt right back to the car. A fist tightened the fabric on the back of her dress and Rey shifted a few millimeters closer to him, giving him a subtle nudge from her elbow.

“Phasma,” he greeted, and he hid the small tremor in his voice with a small cough. “I am sorry we are late. This is Rey Jackson,” he said, allowing Rey the chance to step into the foyer of the brightly lit apartment. They shook hands and Rey was impressed at the grip of the woman before her. “She is an associate I met through my work with Corellia College.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Rey greeted. 

“Likewise,” Phasma replied, giving Rey the once-over. “I don’t think Ren has ever brought a guest to our place before.”

“I don’t think Ren has ever brought a guest anywhere before,” a dry, sardonic tone could be heard from behind her, and she turned to see a tall, slim, red-headed man approach them in the foyer. He looked wary as he stood next to the blonde, who was almost the same height as the men.

She was surrounded by giants everywhere, and Rey was by no means a short woman.

“Hux,” Mr. Ren greeted coolly, reaching out a hand for the other to shake. The man waited a beat but reluctantly took her benefactor’s hand. “Thank you for inviting us. This is Rey.” When Mr. Ren dropped his hand, Rey noticed that his fingers instantly tightened into a fist at his side, still slightly shaking as he tried to subdue his tremor. 

He was trying to keep it together, but Rey could sense that something was wrong. Rey had known him for barely a week, and they had spent mere hours in each other’s presence, but she knew, deep into her soul, that Mr. Ren was scared of losing one of the only people in his life that he could call a friend. 

_Not on my watch,_ she said to herself, ready to do whatever was necessary. _Don’t worry, Mr. Ren. I’ve got your back._

“Please, make yourselves at home,” Phasma said, leading them into a tastefully decorated living room with high-vaulted cathedral ceilings. She watched Hux and Phasma share a warm smile as their hands met in a quick but intimate squeeze.. Other guests were scattered around the house, but it wasn’t a large party. It was just as Mr. Ren had said, an intimate birthday dinner with friends. 

“Can I get you a drink?” Phasma asked Rey, who nodded.

“Just a water is fine,” she looked up at her benefactor. “Ren?” She was not about to call him Mr. Ren in front of his co-workers all night, thank-you-very-much. She still had some pride left. 

He looked down at her with a slight start, apparently lost in his own thoughts. “Yes?”

“Would you like something to drink?”

“Yes, ah, whiskey. On the rocks, Phasma.” She had never been told Phasma’s first name, but just like everyone else she had met, they all seemed fine addressing each other by their surnames. Rey looked up at their host and tried to break the ice with a soft smile.

“Happy birthday, by the way,” she said, drawing attention to herself and away from Mr. Ren. The ginger-haired man nodded in appreciation. 

“Thank you, Rey. It is quite a pleasure to meet an acquaintance of Ren’s from outside of work.” His calculating blue eyes narrowed slightly. “How did you two meet, exactly?”

Mr. Ren fidgeted, but Rey stood firmly at his side and smiled patiently. “We met in the financial aid office at Corellia College, right Ren?” she asked, looking up at him. He shot her a critical look but nodded his agreement. 

“Yes. Yes, that is precisely where we met.”

“I am involved in the plans surrounding his newest donation to the school,” she lied smoothly, using her technique of mixing facts and fiction together into what she called a blended truth. Mr. Ren nodded stiffly, but added nothing of his own. 

Phasma returned with their drinks and Rey took a small sip, feeling Mr. Ren hovering behind her. “Still donating money to the old alma mater, Ren?” Phasma asked. 

Rey was surprised to hear that Ren had attended the same college as her. He'd never mentioned it before now, and she had never thought to ask. 

“Yes,” he said, swallowing the entire contents of his glass in a single gulp. He didn't say anything else and Rey had to nudge him again to get him to add more. “I seem to have a soft spot for that particular establishment.”

A million different questions went unanswered as she mulled over this new information, but she was distracted by Ren’s attempts to follow Rey’s advice from the car.

“How is your cat, Hux?” The man looked at Ren with an upturned lip and confusion in his gaze.

“Excuse me?”

“You own a feline, do you not? And I know you and Phasma recently moved to this neighborhood. Has it been acclimating well to its new environment?”

“Uh, yes,” Hux replied awkwardly. “Millicent is fine.”

Rey knew she had to work fast before things got even more uncomfortable. Ren was nowhere near ready for the big apology and she needed him to feel more at ease before he even attempted it. “Why don't you introduce me to your other co-workers, Ren? I want to meet everyone here.” He shot her a look filled with apprehension but placed his empty glass down and returned his hand to her lower back.

“Of course,” he said as he led her away from their hosts. She glanced behind her furtively, only to witness Hux and Phasma shoot each other shocked and scandalized looks as Ren led her into the rest of the airy, spacious apartment. 

He leaned over her shoulder to whisper his confusion into her ear. “What are we doing? I thought that was going well.”

“It was,” she agreed, talking low so no one could hear her but him. “But we just got here. There’s still a lot of night left and you're not going to apologize until after dinner.”

“What?” He growled, his breath hot on her neck as it set off goosebumps that made her shiver. 

“To use a word that you detest so much, we must mingle, Mr. Ren. You will introduce me to your co-workers and we will make small talk. After, we will eat dinner and socialize some more. Hux needs to see that you’re putting a real effort into this. Then, and only then, will he be willing to forgive you.”

Ren leveled her with a glare that could topple mountains. They had been here for less than fifteen minutes and already he looked ready to snap at the nearest person, who just so happened to be her. 

“I hope you understand how truly uncomfortable I am with all of this,” he grit through clenched teeth.

“I know you are.”

“I am seriously considering smashing my fist into the stone fireplace.”

“I don’t doubt that, Mr. Ren. But that’s what got you into this mess in the first place.” Ren could toss all the snark, sarcasm, and idle threats he had at her, but she was going to toss it all right back at him. Rey refused to let him rile her up just because he was in a panic. “Now if you want this night to unfold to your liking, you will follow my lead, relax a bit, and trust me to do the job you are paying me for.”

His dark eyes glittered with anger, and his fists were clenched at his sides, but with a turn of his upper lip, he took a deep breath and schooled his emotions. HIs aloof facade was firmly in place once more. “How correct you are, Miss Jackson.” 

“Lead the way, Mr. Ren,” she said, and for the first time that evening she was following him instead of being used as a human shield. 

It didn't take long to meet the other few guests that were in attendance. Rey watched Mr. Ren interact with his co-workers in a stiff and professional manner, never really loosening up in the quiet social atmosphere. While he was polite enough during his introductions, he had very little to say about his co-workers besides what department they worked in or how long they had been with the company. He never once seemed at ease, or comfortable enough to drop his guard and enjoy himself. He looked like a warrior prepared for battle instead of a guest at a party.

What would it take, Rey thought to herself, for the stuffy, serious Mr. Ren to shed a little of his tough exterior? What made him laugh? What made him relax and come down from the heights of his intense and relentless job?

Rey wasn’t sure, but she had a profound need to find the answers to her questions. She still knew so little about his personal life, but was becoming quite adept at understanding his tempestuous moods. Every moment spent with Mr. Ren was helping her become more acquainted with his behaviors and body language. While Rey had always been good at reading people as a self-preservation tactic, now she was able to use it as a way to help guide Mr. Ren through his moments of awkwardness or frustration. 

Whispers had filled the air following every single introduction she made, and Rey could feel pairs of lingering eyes staring holes through her back. She had a feeling that she and Ren were the focus of many a conversation this evening, and Phasma seemed to have no problem blatantly staring at her every time she came out of the kitchen to socialize between cooking. 

After about an hour of introductions and short conversations, Rey poured herself another glass of water at the small bar that bordered the kitchen as Mr. Ren chatted with a man named Canady across the room. Phasma entered the living room and informed her guests that dinner would be served shortly. Hux tried to follow her, grabbing her from behind in a tight hug, but he quickly got chased off by his tall, intimidating girlfriend. 

“Stay out there, you!” she laughed, batting Hux’s wandering hands from her hips. Her voice dropped to a whisper, but Rey could still hear her cautious words. “Make sure Ren doesn’t break anything.” She kissed her lover on the cheek and pushed him back towards their guests as the ginger man groaned deeply in disapproval.

Rey had the sudden urge to smack both of their heads together. Couldn't they see how hard he was trying? Did they not realize exactly how much effort he was putting into this? Ren had claimed that Hux was one of his oldest, most closest friends.

Did anyone even know the man at all?

Their meal was served, and Rey sat next to Ren on his right, trying to sit as tall and straight as possible as Phasma and a woman named Bazine started carrying plates out of the kitchen. She could feel Mr. Ren watching her out of the corner of his eye as she began eating with perfect table manners, taking small bites and chewing them slowly with her mouth firmly shut. He made no remarks and eventually his attention turned back to his co-workers, who had started to discuss business over the meal.

Rey had very little to add to the conversation. She knew nothing about trade laws, or international business practices, or million-dollar mergers, and enjoyed being a bystander to a whole different world as she ate her côte de boeuf. 

Mr. Ren, however, commanded the conversation for the first time all evening. Business was his passion, and he was more than willing to engage his co-workers in an in-depth discussion over their current projects at work. 

It was mesmerizing to watch him speak in such an animated way when she was so used to his stilted and sparse conversation. It revealed a facet of his personality that Rey had not witnessed until now, which inspired a well of hope to bubble up inside of her. He was capable of communicating beautifully in regards to topics with which he felt comfortable. He was eloquent and knowledgeable and precise in every statement. All Rey had to do was find a way to transfer those abilities to the many other aspects of his life. 

It was easier said than done. When the conversation eventually shifted away from work topics, Mr. Ren retreated back into himself once more, just as quiet and aloof as he had been all evening. Rey wanted to reach out to him, to encourage him, to find some way to get him to open up once more, but she wasn't capable of that yet. They had only known each other for a week, when Ren had worked with these people for years. If they couldn’t get him to relax, what could she possibly do?

After dinner had ended, Phasma started to clean up while others mingled around the room once more. Hux stood up and reached into his back pocket. “I’ll be right back, I need a smoke,” he said, making his way towards the back porch. Rey quickly nudged Ren in the side with her elbow.

“What?” He said moodily, his tone dark.

“Go,” she nodded towards the porch at Hux’s retreating figure. “Do it now.” His demeanor instantly shifted from angry to anxious.

“What? Now?” He glanced over at the open door as if a demon were going to jump out of it. 

“Yes! While you two have a chance to be alone.”

Panicked didn't even begin to describe the look in his eyes. “I don't know if this is a good idea.”

“It's the best idea,” she said, ignoring the conversation she had overheard between Hux and Phasma earlier in the evening. “Now go.”

“What about you?” He asked, sounding genuinely lost. She could almost see the conflict playing out on his face.

“I'll be right inside the threshold, pretending my cell phone doesn't have any service so I can hear every single thing you say.” She placed a hand on the warm, pale skin of his exposed forearm and watched a small tremor shake through him. “Now go,” she said, as softly and as reassuring as she was capable of being. “Apologize."

Mr. Ren slowly stood from the table and walked out onto the porch. Rey waited a few beats before taking out her cell phone and standing by the the door, pretending to look for service while typing fake text messages. She had missed a few words, but could hear them both loud and clear.

“-I don’t think there’s much more we have to say to one another,” Hux said, his tone firm and unforgiving. Rey listened in on Ren’s private conversation with bated breath. She was deeply invested in the outcome of it and wished she could see everything.

“I disagree,” was Ren’s firm reply. 

“There are pages of documents detailing all the things that were said. You can have HR send you a copy.”

“Armitage,” Ren pleaded, despair seeping into his tone. Hux wouldn't let him say anything else.

“Don't you dare,” Hux threatened. “Not when you've been going by ‘Kylo Ren’ for the past seven years.” Rey’s confusion was a momentary distraction. Kylo Ren was a pseudonym? 

So what was his name?

“You know what Snoke did to us, Hux,” Ren begged, sounding desperate. “You know that this is what he wanted to happen.” Hux released a long and labored sigh. Who was Snoke? Rey was completely lost, since the two men obviously shared a long and tangled history that she could never fully understand. “We used to be friends.”

“You used to be nicer,” was Hux’s short reply. 

“I used to be a lot of things, Hux. I am trying to make things right.”

“And when we go to work on Monday, will you be just as cutthroat as ever? Or is this another paradigm shift in the personality of Ben Solo?”

Rey could practically hear the growl in Ren’s tone. Or was it Ben Solo’s tone? “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that since I’m trying to make things right between us.”

“Things stopped being right when you chose being Snoke’s pitbull over acting like an actual person.”

Rey could almost feel the waves of frustration emanating off of Mr. Ren. “I’m trying,” he grit through a clenched jaw. “Can’t you see that?”

There was a short pause, and Rey’s heart was pounding in anticipation of Hux’s next comment. Mr. Ren sounded absolutely tortured by Hux’s dismissal and she wished that there was something she could do to help.

“Yes, well,” Hux drawled, a touch of sarcasm in his tone. “That cannot be denied. This is the most I have heard you speak outside of work in years. And you brought along a living, breathing woman, who seems to actually enjoy your company. That itself is its own miracle.”

Another low growl echoed in Ren’s throat. “Why do I want us to be friends again?” His voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Who is she, by the way?” Hux asked, ignoring Ren’s comment. There was a short pause before Ren answered, her heart unexpectedly somersaulting in her chest.

“She is a student at Corellia College. I hope to take her under my wing as a protege of my own.” 

“Why?” Hux asked, suddenly angry. “So you could twist her up the same way Snoke twisted you?”

“No,” he assured Hux. “She has potential. I wish to help her.”

“The best way to help her would be to stay as far away from her as possible,” Hux replied, blunt and completely unapologetic. 

Rey’s spirits were beginning to freefall as they continued their verbal sparring. Ren was trying so hard to break through to his friend, but the gap between the two men felt far too wide to bridge in one night.

“I take it I am not forgiven, then?” Rey clutched her cell phone in her hand, giving up all pretenses of trying to find service and hanging on to every second of the conversation. 

“I’m trying, Ren. I really am,” Hux sounded exhausted. “You were my best mate for a time, and you’re the best damn negotiator I have ever heard, but I barely even recognize you anymore. All I see is Snoke when you enter a room. All I hear is Snoke when you open your mouth. Maybe it would be better if we went our separate ways and maintained a strictly professional work relationship.”

Rey wanted to cry for her benefactor, and she almost did when she heard him cover his shaky voice with a small cough. “I will be leaving, then. I am sorry to have bothered-.”

“But then I remember,” Hux interrupted, “The day my dad died. You took me to a bar. Got me so drunk I couldn’t remember the words to ‘God Save the Queen.’”

“I carried your ass up three flights of stairs,” Ren added.

“I know.” Another frustrated sigh. “And when Phasma transferred from the London office and you sent me an email every hour demanding if I had asked her out yet.”

“You wouldn’t shut up about her. It was annoying.”

“What I am trying to say is, there are some redeeming qualities to you. I am trying my hardest to remember what they all are.” There was another short pause before Hux spoke once more. “I want to give you another chance. You can come over next week for dinner. Bring the girl with you. You seem to be infinitely more agreeable when she is around.”

“I will ask if Rey is available.” No other words were exchanged between the two as Ren turned on his heel and came back into the house. 

He spotted Rey immediately and approached her while she tried in vain to rid her eyes of the moisture that had collected there. A sliver of a tear was wiped away hastily as he stood in front of her. Pure pain was reflecting in his eyes as she took in the lost, broken expression on his face. While the conversation had not gone entirely to plan, there was still hope for the future of Ren and Hux’s friendship. They just needed more time.

“I want to leave,” he demanded darkly, and she had to bite the inside of her cheek to stop the rush of empathy she felt for him.

“Let’s go,” she said, grabbing her handbag and staying firmly at his side as they said a hasty goodbye to the other guests. Phasma and Hux were waiting at the door to see them out.

“Rey, please let us know when you’ll be available for dinner next week,” Phasma said with a soft smile. She leaned over the shorter woman to whisper in her ear. “And whatever you are doing with Ren, keep up the good work.”

Rey didn’t know whether to be offended or grateful as Mr. Ren led her back towards his car. The night had gone smoothly enough, but there was something about Ren’s co-workers that left Rey with a bitter taste in her mouth. They all seemed nice at first, yet every look and comment and glance was veiled with nothing but sarcasm and snide remarks. It was difficult to gauge whether or not the night had been a success.

Mr. Ren seemed to have retreated into himself for the remainder of the night. Rey’s feeble attempts to get him to try and talk all failed spectacularly. With a flash of panic, she wondered if he was mad at her. Did he blame this all on her? Did he even want her help anymore? Would he. . .? Would he . . .?

Would he take back the money he had promised her for school?

Panicked thoughts plagued her throughout the drive back to campus. He pulled into the parking lot outside of Hoth Hall and put the car into park, shutting off the engine and letting his head fall back onto the seat with a soft thud.

Rey waited for him to do something. She was expecting him to sigh, or groan, or grit his teeth and finally let his explosive anger out for all to see. There were a million questions she wanted to ask, yet didn’t know how to approach any of them. Who was Snoke? Who was Ben Solo? 

Who was the man who had changed so much he was no longer recognizable to his friends?

She waited, but Mr. Ren didn’t move a muscle. He just sat with his head back against the rest with his eyes closed, and Rey didn’t know what to do. Did he expect her to just leave? Was he truly mad at her?

“I, um, well. Goodnight,” she said softly, a certain sadness creeping up on her at his silence. She reached over for the door handle, ready to escape to her room so she could cry for the rest of the night. He was probably furious at her for failing him, and for wasting his time and money on a nobody like her--

“Wait,” was his soft reply. A warm hand rested on her left knee as she turned back to look at Mr. Ren. There was a tenderness to his gaze that caused a soft fluttering to erupt in her belly and she couldn’t look away. 

“What is it?”

“How did you do it?”

She tilted her head in confusion, not understanding his meaning as he removed his hand from her leg. “What do you mean?”

“You were exquisite tonight, Miss Jackson. Exquisite. You knew exactly what to do. You knew exactly what to say. You knew what I was feeling, what I needed, before I even did. So I will ask once more. How did you do it?”

She shrugged her shoulders, opening and closing her mouth like a fish out of water as she struggled to answer. “I- I don’t know. I’m really good at reading people, but there’s just something about you that’s different. You’re not an easy person to get to know, but when we’re together, I can just sense it. I just know.”

He didn’t look like he believed her. “No one has ever claimed to know my thoughts and feelings in such a way,” he said bitterly. “So I guess you are the first.”

“I hope it helped,” she added.

“Hmm,” he hummed. “As do I.” He started the engine once more and Rey got ready to leave the car. “I will be out of the country for a few days, Miss Jackson. I will contact you soon to schedule our next event.”

“Have a good trip, Mr. Ren,” she said, but the car door was still locked when she tried to leave.

“Miss Jackson,” he said, his voice slightly teasing. “My earrings, please.”

“Oh!” She gasped, completely forgetting about the small fortune’s worth of precious stones that were currently dangling from her ears. She quickly took them off and placed them in the small velvet box she had tucked into her bag. “Here you go.”

Instead of saying goodbye, he stared at her once more, making a blush erupt on her face as he appraised her with his dark gaze. She quickly exited the car and heard him muttering to himself as she slammed the door. “Yes, quite exquisite indeed.”

She had a feeling he wasn’t talking about the diamonds.

Without another word, Mr. Ren pulled off into the night, leaving Rey alone in the parking lot outside of Hoth Hall. It would be a while before she saw him again, but it gave her enough time to digest everything that had taken place and figure out how to approach the next phase of their objective. 

She walked into her dorm building and made her way down the hall and to her door. After a good night’s sleep and some deep reflection, Rey knew that she was on her way to making things right between Ren and Hux.

There was only one obstacle standing in the pathway of her most current plan.

The single white sock that was decorating her doorknob.


	6. The White Sock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of your comments and kudos have been making this whole experience more wonderful than I could have ever hoped for! I hope you are enjoying whatever crazy monster this fic is becoming.

The white sock mocked her as she sat outside of her dorm room with a frown, resting her head against the wall as she glared up at the offending doorknob. Rey had knocked on the door fifteen minutes ago, and the only response she had received was a loud, aroused moan from her best friends. The sound sparked a wave of embarrassment that literally knocked the strength from her knees as she slid against the wall and let her legs fan out in front of her on the floor.

She had been sitting there ever since, her butt slowly going numb as she thought about her limited options. Rey knew that Rose and Finn were having sex, so entering the room would serve to only embarrass everyone involved, and Rey already felt awkward enough. She could wait it out for a little while longer in the hopes that they were done sooner rather than later.

Or she could sleep in the common room and just avoid her best friends altogether, pretending that their sex life simply did not exist.

The same way that hers didn’t exist.

She hugged her knees to her chest with a sigh and knocked again. Her only response was more noise bleeding from inside of her room. They seemed to be having a really great time as Rey’s mind started to wander onto the topic at hand. She wondered what it would feel like to trust someone so implicitly that she could finally let her walls down and allow someone to see her. Touch her. Brand her with fingers and hands and lips and skin-on-skin. She had been so closed off from people her entire life, so afraid to let anyone close, that touch was still an alien behavior to her. 

When she had started college and met Finn through their job at CCC, she had almost broken his wrist the first time he had tried to hug her. She had been so used to associating touch with violence that it was usually her first instinct to avoid it altogether. It took months for Rey to get used to the friendly gestures that she now exchanged with people on a daily basis, but she mostly still avoided it.

That was one of the reasons why she had been so affected by Mr. Ren over the past week. The man always found some small way to touch her. His hand on her back, his palm over her hands, his finger stroking her jaw; every time he touched her it caused her body to respond in new and terrifying ways. Ways she had never reacted around Rose, Finn, or Poe. It was thrilling and exciting and scary all at the same time.

And she wanted more of it.

But Mr. Ren was her benefactor. Their relationship was strictly business, so his soft, gentle brushes shouldn't make her feel like her bones were trying to jump out of her skin. She shouldn't keep picturing his long wavy hair and wondering how soft it would feel if she ran it through her fingers. She shouldn’t be thinking about his giant frame and how good it felt to have him by her side all night, a firm, solid presence that never left.

Rey was simply lonely, that was the only reason why she was picturing Mr. Ren in such a way. He had been so generous, providing her with the kind of financial security that had allowed her to ease a huge burden. She couldn’t confuse her graciousness for actual romantic feelings. It was only because she longed for romance so badly; whether it be the simple, easy affection she had witnessed between Phasma and Hux, or the steadfast companionship of Rose and Finn. She wanted to find someone to share herself with, someone who could open up her eyes to an entire world she had never known.

A world where Rey was truly and deeply loved.

 _Someday,_ she hoped in the deepest, most secret chamber of her heart. _Someday I will know what love is._

Right now, however, she was so lonely it felt hollow inside. Most days she could keep it under control, but the night's events were creeping up on her and all she wanted to do was go to bed. Another loud, feminine wail could be heard bleeding through the door, and the rest of Rey’s patience was quickly growing thin. It was her room, too! Why should she be the one standing outside when they were the ones encroaching on her living space?

She refused to sit outside any longer. She was coming in whether or not they had come. 

Her key card buzzed in the lock and she was grateful the lights were off as Rose and Finn screamed and reached over to pull the blankets over their nakedness. She clicked on the small table lamp on her bedside table for some light and caught a large brown butt cheek as it tried to scoot under the blankets. 

“Rey!” Rose started to yell as she watched her two best friends rush to hide themselves. “Girl, there was a sock on the door!” She sounded quite disappointed to be interrupted but Rey’s patience had reached its limit. 

“Yes, and I knocked twice! I’ve been waiting out there for almost twenty minutes,” she tossed off her shoes and placed them her closet. “I’m sorry you two were too preoccupied with each other’s crotches to notice me there.”

Finn sat up and let the sheets drop off his exposed chest while Rose still hid behind layers of blankets. “Sorry, Peanut! Once I get my hands on this one, I just can’t stop,” he cuddled his girlfriend close as a bitter, foreign emotion washed over Rey. It was unfair to have to bear witness to her friend’s perfect sex life when she had never even been touched before. It sickened Rey how much she wanted a relationship like that, and her heart ached to experience those feelings on her own.

It was hard to admit, but Rey was envious of Finn and Rose’s relationship, their sex life, and their love.

It was a combination that left her feeling more alone than ever. Rey adored her friends. She was the one who had introduced Rose to Finn. But it was a feeling she simply could not shake as bitterness creeped into her.

“Well, just remember I live her too, please,” her tone was annoyed as she grabbed her pajamas. She would have to go to the bathroom to change. Finn might be her best friend, but he was naked under those sheets and she had already seen enough of him for one night. “I could hear you guys moaning from outside the door.”

She left them in the room while Rey changed in the bathroom, and when she came back, Finn and Rose were dressed in their pajamas as well. Finn didn’t sleep over all the time, but often enough that Rey was used to having the extra body in the room. After walking in on them having sex, however, Rey still experienced lingering strands of both annoyance and envy, a curious mix that left her feeling raw and emotional. 

“Rey?” Rose asked as she plugged in her cell phone. Rey looked up at her roommate with a blank expression as she hung her green dress in the closet.

“Yes?”

“Are you, like, mad at us or something?” Both Finn and Rose looked worried as Rey closed her eyes with a sigh. How could she explain the complexities of what she was feeling? Lonely, desperate, envious and exhausted, and that was only the beginning of it. They both knew that Rey was a virgin, but how could she explain this deep, deep well of pain inside of her that filled her up at the most random times? How could she explain her longing and her desire to find the unconditional love she had been craving her entire life?

She couldn’t. There were no words to express those feelings. 

“No, I’m not mad,” she sighed as she climbed into bed, hoping to drop the subject. “I’m annoyed you didn’t hear me, but I’m not mad at you guys for enjoying your private time.”

Finn let out a sigh of relief and adjusted him and Rose under the covers so they were tucked into each other’s sides. Rey couldn’t even look at them as she nestled into her empty bed, trying to will away such toxic feelings. “See, babe? I told you she’s okay. Rey’s just not that into sexy stuff, you know?”

“What!?” Rey asked, shooting up in bed once more. Any pretense of sleep had just flown out of the window at Finn’s ludicrous and incorrect claim. “I- I am so! I like sex and, and sexy stuff!” Her voice sounded especially childish during her feeble attempts at maturity.

“It’s okay to be a bit reserved, Rey,” Finn consoled her gently. “You don’t have to explain it to us, we know things have been rough for you and we understand.”

“Finn, there’s nothing to understand,” she gasped, completely caught off guard by her best friend’s twisted opinion of her. “Just because I’m a virgin, doesn’t mean I don’t like sex! It doesn’t mean I’m not interested in it! I’ve just never done it before.”

“Yeah, but,” Rose hesitated, afraid to incite more of Rey’s ire. “Whenever someone tries to talk about it, you get all flustered and change the subject. You don’t date and you definitely don’t flirt with people. You’ve never even claimed to like anyone before!” Rey felt like she was being attacked from every side as hot tears began to fill her eyes. Rose could see how distressed Rey was getting and tried to be supportive. “But it’s okay! It’s not like there’s anything wrong with that!”

Rey had to fight to get her thoughts out through her tears, her voice thick with pain. “I might not be as open as other people are about it, but my sex life is my business. As my friends, I thought you would respect that.”

“We do, Rey,” Rose pleaded. “Please, we’re sorry we upset you.”

“Fine,” she sniffled, laying back down and facing the wall so her friends couldn’t see her tear-streaked face. This is what they thought of her. To her friends, she was some kind of sexless prude. “Good night.”

“Wait, Rey,” Finn started, but Rey cut him off.

“It’s fine,” she clipped angrily, reaching over to shut off her table lamp. “Good night.”

Rey said nothing as she heard Finn and Rose settle for bed on the mattress across from her. They were whispering to one another, but Rey couldn’t hear them and frankly, she didn’t want to. She squeezed her eyes tight as a wave of fresh tears hit her, biting down on her pillowcase to stop from sobbing. How could her friends make such an assumption about her? How could her friends misunderstand her in such a way?

Did they even know her at all?

It was the same thought that had plagued her while in the midsts of Ren’s co-workers and so-called friends. None of those people seemed to notice the struggle that Ren had endured just to sit through cocktail hour. They didn’t realize that he was actually making an effort to change himself for the better. If this is what Mr. Ren had to go through on a daily basis, no wonder why he was so tortured and anti-social. 

Part of her wished that she could talk to him. Ask him if this hollow ache of loneliness inside of her was the same way he felt when Hux had dismissed his apology. She wanted to believe it was.

She wanted to believe he was just as lonely as her.

It was the only thought that brought comfort as she fell asleep on a pillow dampened with tears.

When she woke the next morning, Finn and Rose were already gone, leaving her alone in the small dorm room. It was a Saturday, and for Rey that meant the entire day would be spent doing homework and preparing for the week ahead. There was a small event that CCC needed her to work that evening, but the entirety of the day was hers to do as she pleased. There was still the matter of Mr. Ren’s next dinner with Hux and Phasma, and Rey had to figure out when she was free to attend.

She went to the cafe, where she used her meal plan to purchase a tea and a breakfast sandwich before returning to her dorm room for the morning. Her new laptop filled the room with low music as she spread out her books and got to work. It was barely two weeks into the semester and already she had papers to write and projects to start planning. One of the projects for her engineering lecture was a design portfolio worth a whopping eighty percent of the grade. Director Krennic had been known to refer the best designs to firms, companies, and businesses that could potentially buy and produce the product, or even hire the student after graduation for an instant job opportunity.

Her mind wandered, thinking about the only place she had ever wanted to work and how this project could potentially get her there. It filled her with a determination to start planning the design now, even if the first outline wasn’t due until October. She took out a piece of graph paper to start sketching out the basic schematics as her quiet afternoon continued. 

By mid-afternoon, Finn and Rose still hadn’t returned yet, and for that Rey was grateful. She adored her friends, but wanted a bit of space so she could digest everything that had been said the night before. It had been on the forefront of her mind all day, and she dreaded the moment when Rose returned and they were actually forced to talk about it.

Because Rose had actually made a valid point that Rey did not want to admit. Rey didn't like talking about sex. She didn't like the reminder that she was so inexperienced. She hated that her life had been so wrapped around self-preservation and survival that she had missed out on such a monumental development. She kept her thoughts and desires private for a reason, which had led to a major misunderstanding on the part of her friends. Having to explain herself would just rip open all of those ancient, aching wounds, making the pain of her past feel fresh all over again. 

How did she change her friend's perspectives of her while still staying true to herself? She wasn't looking to jump into bed with the first man who flirted with her, Rey was searching for the kind of earth-shattering love she had always been denied. She wasn't afraid of sex, or affection, or nakedness, but she wasn't going to wear provocative clothing or throw herself at every attractive person who crossed her path. 

Finn might have been a little bit right when he said that she was reserved, but Rey was absolutely and unequivocally interested in sex and sexy stuff.

She just had no clue where to begin.

Rose didn't return to the room for the rest of the day which made Rey feel conflicted. She didn't want this to ruin the peace that existed between them, but she also didn't want to talk about the feelings behind her actions, and how bitterly envious she had been the night before. How envious she was _still._

Rey was grateful that she had been called in to cater a small welcoming event for the education department. She had been put on the wait staff and spent the event scooping out portions of veggies and rolls of bread. Rey got to bring home a doggie bag filled with leftovers and made it back to her dorm by 10.

Rose still wasn't home.

Now Rey was starting to panic. Her friends meant so much to her, and she was worried that their fight had changed the dynamics of their friendship. They had never fought before, so she couldn't be sure. She shouldn't have been so defensive, Rey thought to herself angrily. She shouldn't have tried to brush off their apologies before bed.

Tears flowed from her eyes unbidden as she sat alone at her desk in her empty dorm room. Rose hadn't texted, or left a note, and was probably out for the rest of the night. The loneliness was back with a vengeance as she beat herself up over her actions.

Rey threw on some pajamas and put her hair up into a low ponytail as she got ready to go to bed early. There was no use trying to wait up just so they could fight all night long. Things would have to be resolved in the morning.

If Rose ever came back home.

Rey was about to resign herself to sleep when her phone suddenly started ringing. The number was mostly ones and zeroes, and Rey realized that it was an international number.

Her heart pounded when she picked up the phone, already knowing who it was. “Hello?”

“Miss Jackson?” The voice she heard over the phone was hoarse, tired, and twisted with sadness. To her it was the best sound she had heard all day.

“Mr. Ren?” She asked, sitting up in bed. “Where are you?”

“London,” was his gruff response. “I am here until Monday.” Rey did the math in her head. If it was 10:30 at night on the east coast, then in London it was. . .

“Mr. Ren, its 3:30 in the morning there!” Rey gasped. “What are you doing up?”

A long, labored sigh could be heard on the other end. “Miss Jackson, despite my wealth, sleep is a luxury that I can rarely afford.” Rey wondered if the man ever slept at all. “I called while I had a spare moment. I would like to know if you are free on Tuesday for dinner with Hux and Phasma.”

“Yes,” she replied. “I have already checked my schedule for this week and that should work out fine.” 

“Excellent,” was his crisp response. “Then I will leave you to your evening, Miss Jackson.” Mr. Ren tried to end their incredibly brief phone call as Rey suddenly panicked. She had barely spoken to another person all day besides work, and was still feeling miserably raw and lonely. Last night she had wanted to speak to Mr. Ren so badly, and now that she had him on the phone she didn't want to let him go. She had so many questions for him and suddenly needed to know all the answers to them.

“Wait,” she gasped, hating how her voice shook.

“What is it?” 

“I-,” she didn't know what to say, and her emotions were piling up onto one another as tears started to fall again. “I had a terrible day and I could really use someone to talk to.” She hated how her voice cracked at the end of her confession. He didn't say anything and she rushed to cover her embarrassment. “You know what, nevermind, it's really stupid-.”

“Miss Jackson,” he interrupted, but his voice was gentle as it rumbled in her ear. “What happened?”

She closed her eyes tightly as twin tears dripped from her chin. “My friends said something to me last night that started a bit of a fight, and now I’m just really upset.” She sniffled miserably. 

“What did they say?”

There was no way she was explaining her problem to Mr. Ren. It was hard enough trying to figure out how to explain things to Rose. “I can't tell you.”

“I see,” he replied stiffly. 

“No, please,” she panicked, “it’s just a sensitive topic and I don't-.”

“It’s alright, Miss Jackson,” he crooned to her, and she felt more at ease when she heard the softness in his voice. “Please continue.” For a man running on little sleep he was being incredibly patient with her. 

“I don't know how to talk to my roommate about this issue. She said something that hurt my feelings, even if she was a bit right. Rose hasn't been home all day and I now I feel like I chased her away,” she ended with a shaky sob. He waited a few beats before responding gently.

“As someone who has chased away every single friend I've ever had, I can say with confidence that I know exactly how you feel. I am sorry there is little I can do to aid you in resolving this issue.”

She sniffled, wondering why he almost seemed proud that he had so thoroughly alienated himself. “Why, though? It has to be important to you, otherwise you wouldn’t be so bothered about Hux.”

A darkness entered his tone that caused her to shiver. “You would be surprised what people are willing to do in pursuit of power, Miss Jackson.”

“So what changed?” She wondered. “Why does Hux matter now?”

A shaky exhale was her only response as silence stretched over the long distance call. “You said you were alone in your room, right Miss Jackson?”

“Um, yes,” she replied in confusion.

“And no one could potentially overhear what was being said?” 

“What are you going to tell me? Government secrets?”

“This is hard enough to say out loud, Miss Jackson. I don’t like the idea of sharing my thoughts with strangers or eavesdroppers.” That was a sentiment that Rey understood implicitly, and had to respect it. If Mr. Ren wanted complete privacy, she would provide that for him. She scooted out of her bed and went over to the little white sock on the floor that had started the entire debacle between her, Rose and Finn. She placed it on the outside doorknob with a slight thrill as she firmly shut the door and returned to her bed. She had never used the sock trick before, since there had never been a need for privacy of any kind. 

“If anyone comes by, they’ll have to knock. I’m the only one here,” she said, a certain rush kicking through her that Mr. Ren was willing to trust her with his most confidential secrets. The little white sock had gone from her enemy to her shield.

“I once had a benefactor of my own, Miss Jackson,” he said slowly. “We were introduced during an internship between my junior and senior years at Corellia College. I was hired by his firm directly out of school, along with an international student who had also been an intern.”

“Was that Hux?”

“Indeed,” he claimed. “We both started at the same time, but my benefactor always paid me more attention. Always claimed that I had more potential. He started making us work against one another, to foster competitiveness and ruthlessness. Hux and I played into it for a long time.” 

“Was it,” she reached into her memory for the name from last night. “Snoke?”

“I keep forgetting you were listening into our conversation,” he grumbled. “But yes. Snoke was my benefactor for the first few years I spent at First Order Industries. He is my current boss now.”

“You said Snoke wanted your friendship with Hux to fall apart,” she remembered. “Why is that?”

“Snoke is old. Frail. He had a cancer diagnosis a few years back that left him scarred and sickly. He wants me to be the one to take over the company when he ultimately retires. He never married, or had kids. I’ve never even seen a picture or a personal item in his office. The man only cares about one thing, and he’s done everything in his power to make sure I was molded in his image.”

His conversation with Hux was beginning to make more sense to her. Suddenly, Rey remembered another name from the night before. “Who is Ben Solo?”

A bitter scoff was his reply. “A person I haven’t been in a long time.”

“So Kylo Ren is a pseudonym?”

“Obviously,” he scoffed and she rolled her eyes.

“Can I call you Ben?” She asked hopefully, already knowing his answer.

“Not if you want to keep receiving money for college,” he deadpanned. She smiled for the first time all day.

“Okay, Mr. Ren,” she said, as the name Ben echoed through her thoughts. Rey’s heart felt very full at the moment, a stark contrast to how she had felt earlier in the conversation. He was opening up and sharing his past with her. Every time he said something else, another puzzle piece came together in the form of Kylo Ren.

Or Ben Solo.

Whatever name he wanted to go by, she was starting to flesh out his history and everything that had led him to his current situation. 

“Two summers ago, Brexit happened.” Rey groaned, having lived in London when it had all taken place. “My company is based in London, and Snoke moved back full time to oversee business here. We’re fully entrenched in legal disputes from both sides and he put me in charge of the US office in his absences. It was then, after he was gone and I was finally able to think for myself again, that I realized what he had done to me.” Rey nodded in sympathy as he continued. “He made me just like him. No friends. No family. Nothing mattered but business. One day, it was like I had snapped out of a dream, but it was really more like a nightmare, because I had no one left.” His voice carried the very familiar lilt of loneliness of which she was accustomed. “I thought to reach out to Hux because we still see each other on a daily basis. I assumed it would be the easiest.”

Her neck was starting to hurt from holding up her phone, so she cuddled into her blankets and laid her head on the pillow. Mr. Ren’s voice was the only thing she could hear as she cocooned the blankets around her, bathing in the intimacy of their secret conversation. But it didn't feel like she was speaking with Kylo Ren, It felt like she was speaking to a man named Ben Solo.

“What about your family?” She wondered, since he had never once mentioned it. 

“My issues with my family began way before Snoke became my mentor, but after that they only became worse,” he explained. “My mother, however, has been incredibly gracious to me these past few months. I cannot say the same for my father and uncle.”

“I’m sorry,” she sympathized.

“Don’t be, Miss Jackson. I am not the kind of man who welcomes pity.”

“I don’t pity you,” she assured him. “I know what loneliness feels like.” She fidgeted under her covers, still needing an outlet for her pain. “Last night I felt terrible, and the only thing I could think of was how badly I wanted to call you,” her heart was pounding at her quiet confession.

“Y-you did?” His tone was incredulous.

“Yes, I really did.”

“B-but,” he stammered, his usual eloquence deserting him. “Why?”

“All I kept thinking about was your conversation with Hux,” she explained, feeling the tears creep back into her eyes. “And how hard you were trying to apologize. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. When I fought with my friends, I just felt so lonely, and I was miserable,” she admitted, softly crying. “I felt like no one really knew me. I had never felt so alone.”

“You’re not alone,” was his tender confession, his voice reaching out to her over thousands of miles of earth and air and sea. She closed her eyes as his words seeped into every crack that had ever splintered her heart, filling up the spaces as more tears fell.

“Neither are you.” For the first time in her life, the aching loneliness was replaced with something infinitely more comforting as they shared a silent moment of understanding. They had both suffered through such solitude, still felt it on a daily basis.

But they weren’t alone anymore. Now they had each other.

“Rey,” he said softly, and the serenity in his voice made her heart stutter. “I-”

She couldn't hear what Mr. Ren had said, since a loud, booming knock had instantly startled Rey out of the intimacy of their conversation.

“Rey?” Was Rose’s panicked greeting. “Rey, are you in there?” Rey threw the blankets off of her quickly with a gasp. The sock on the door!

“Um, give me a minute! Don’t come in!” She rushed, feeling like she was the one being caught with her pants down. “Mr. Ren?” She whispered in the phone. “My roommate is back.”

“I see,” was his suddenly callous reply.

“Rey, are you alone?” Rose yelled. “Is someone in there with you?”

“I-I’m on the phone!” She called. “I’ll be right there!” She clutched the phone in her hands. “I gotta go,” the reluctance was clear in her tone. 

“Promise me one thing, Miss Jackson, before you go,” he demanded. Rose was still calling from the hallway but Rey ignored her.

“What is it?”

“The next time you have a need to call me, please do. I don’t care what time it is or what country I am in. Whether it be London, Dubai, or Tokyo, just call. There is a good chance I will need to speak to you as well.” A warm, pleasant feeling snaked through her chest and wrapped itself around her heart.

“I promise.” 

“And when you make up with your friends, which I know you will,” he said warmly, “Please take notes so we can apply your technique to Hux.”

She beamed to herself in her empty room, “I will. Good night, Mr. Ren.” 

_Good night, Ben. ___

__“Good night,” he hung up the phone and Rey jumped to her feet to let Rose into the room. Her tiny roommate looked around the small space as she entered, making sure that Rey was actually alone as her face stayed twisted in confusion._ _

__“Hey,” Rey said, biting her lip in anticipation. “Where’s Finn?”_ _

__“He’s staying at the frat house tonight,” Rose said, still searching around the room. She finally stopped and fixed Rey with a pointed look. “Rey,” Rose drawled, “Why was there a sock on the door?”_ _

__“I, um,” she stuttered. “I was having a private conversation with someone.”_ _

__“With who?” Rose’s eyes suddenly lit up as her body language morphed from wary to excited. “Was it a guy?”_ _

__A crimson blush painted Rey’s face, and something inside of her possessed her to say the word, “Yes.”_ _

__“Were you two. . .,” she trailed off as her brows tilted up in amusement. “Were you having phone sex?”_ _

__“What?! No! No. It was just a conversation that required a certain amount of privacy.” Rey knew it was in her power to stop Rose’s train of thought, but she didn’t want to. It felt good to be able to claim someone as her own, even if he wasn’t really hers. A bold, assertive part of her wanted to prove to Rose that she was, in fact, a sexual being, despite the fact that her relationship with Mr. Ren was strictly platonic._ _

__Rose practically screamed with excitement as she tossed her handbag onto her bed with a shout. “Oh my God! Tell me everything! Who is he? What’s his name?”_ _

__“Um, his name is Ben,” she said, wincing when she realized what she was truly doing. “We met. . . we met through the new financial aid program.”_ _

__“Rey, I am so happy for you!” Rose fawned, enveloping the taller girl in a warm and comforting hug. “I am so sorry about last night and all the things we said to you. Finn and I were wrong to make assumptions about your life, especially when we were so completely wrong!”_ _

__Rose grinned widely at her friend, but Rey could barely summon a grimace in return. Blending facts and fiction together into a cover story was one thing, but claiming that Mr. Ren was some kind of secret boyfriend was nothing more than a blatant lie. As intimate as their conversation had been, and she had never felt so close to someone, ever, nothing about their relationship involved sex._ _

__“Tell me everything,” Rose gushed. Before Rey could even open her mouth, Rose rushed to cover it back up with her palm. “Wait, no! Don’t tell me anything. I respect your sex life, Rey, and I don’t want you to tell me anything about this guy or what you’re doing unless you’re one hundred percent okay with it.”_ _

__Rey felt an overwhelming urge to smack her forehead with her palm, but resisted. “Whatever you say, Rose.”_ _

__“We’re okay, right?” Rose asked plaintively. “I just felt so bad about it all day…”_ _

__“It’s alright, Rose,” Rey reassured her as she climbed back into bed. She just wanted to drop the subject and forget any of it ever happened. “I’m sorry, too. I know I’m not the most open person, but I’m working on it.”_ _

__“It’s alright, Rey. Maybe Ben can help you out with that!” Rose supplied with enthusiasm._ _

__Rey snickered as she fluffed her pillows. “He’s even worse than I am.”_ _

__“Then you guys are perfect for each other!” Rose gushed as she got changed for bed._ _

__“Good night, Rose!” She said, hiding her face into her pillows. Her roommate got into bed shortly after and shut off the lights, leaving Rey to her twisted thoughts. While she knew it was wrong to claim that Mr. Ren was anything more than her benefactor, that fiery part of her that reacted every time he was around was more than happy to lay claim on the attractive businessman. Mr. Ren was her secret to keep, in more ways than one, and it sent a rush of heat through her to think of him in such a way._ _

__Mr. Ren. Ben Solo. Two completely different names for two completely different facets of his personality. Monstrous and dangerous one moment, gentle and safe the next._ _

__She fell asleep wondering which version would greet her on Tuesday._ _


	7. Generosity

For the rest of the weekend, Rey’s engineering portfolio took precedence as she started to visualize the many intricacies of her design. Her idea excited her, and she was looking forward to developing it more throughout the semester. Director Krennic had outlined a very strict time-frame for the project, which was comprised of three parts; a sketch, a prototype, and a research and development paper that could be no less than fifteen pages long. 

It was a lot to prepare, but she had all of the resources of the engineering department behind her, including use of their 3D printers and access to their workshop. 

Rey was sketching out a detailed piece of machinery, all of her own design, when her phone started to beep. Rose wasn’t back from her class yet as Rey read it to herself in the empty room. It was from Mr. Ren.

_Ventress cannot dress you tonight, so please wear appropriate attire for a casual dinner. I will pick you up at 7._

Rey bit her lip, now wondering what she was going to wear. She had many items to choose from, but was still wary of putting outfits together on her own. Rey still had some borrowed jewelry from Ventress, and planned on wearing it this evening, but she doubted that Mr. Ren would offer her the earrings from Friday night for a casual meal with friends. 

With a sigh, Rey realized that there were still things she needed, even after spending over a thousand dollars on a new wardrobe. Accessories, jewelry, shoes, handbags; she had bought the bare minimum because her focus had been on clothing. It depressed her that it still wasn’t enough.

She couldn’t possibly ask Mr. Ren for more money. He had been the epitome of generosity over the past two weeks and it felt wrong to ask for more. He wasn’t just a walking, talking piggy bank, he was trying to secure a proper future for her. She could not take advantage of him.

Rose probably had some nice jewelry she could borrow for the evening, she thought as she tried to piece together an outfit from last week’s shopping spree. She had never owned much clothing, so the full wardrobe in front of her seemed more than a little intimidating. Choosing a dress was easy, so Rey wanted to challenge herself, even if she didn’t know where to begin.

Luckily, Rose saved the day as she trudged her way into the room and kicked off her heavy Doc Martens into her corner. Finn was following close behind her with a backpack slung over his shoulder. “Hey!” he greeted warmly.

“Hey guys,” she said, happy that they were no longer stuck in their post-fight awkwardness. Rose had communicated Rey’s little white lie about Mr. Ren to Finn, and now the couple fully believed that she was chatting with another undergrad on campus.

They could not be any more wrong. Mr. Ren was not an undergraduate, nor was he currently involved in a relationship with her. But if it got her friends to think that Rey was putting herself out there, then she wasn’t going to change their minds.

“Rose, I need your help,” Rey called from her closet, pulling out a frilly black skirt with a frown.

“What’s up, Rey?” She asked as she put away her textbooks from class. Finn plopped onto Rose’s bed and reached for the TV remote. 

“I need your help picking out an outfit for tonight,” she explained. Finn started wiggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner.

“Oh, Peanut, you got a hot date?” He made air kisses at her. “Rose told me all about your new boo.”

“He is not my boo,” Rey denied stiffly. 

“Will he be there?” Rose asked hopefully, her hands clasped together under her chin. 

“Yes,” she sighed dramatically. “Ben will be there. We are going to dinner with other international students from the program.” It was getting easier and easier for Rey to smooth over the details of her time with Mr. Ren, and she couldn’t tell whether or not it was a good thing.

“I want to meet this dude,” Finn stated firmly, crossing his hands over his chest. “We don’t know anything about him.”

Rey chuckled nervously, hiding her face in the closet again. There was no way that Finn could ever meet Mr. Ren. It would be a disaster. “What’s there to know? He isn’t even my boyfriend.”

“What dorm is he in?” Finn refused to drop the subject.

“He lives off campus,” she supplied smoothly while comparing two blouses. Rose came over to the closet to help her.

“What’s his major?”

“Business.”

“Is he in a fraternity?”

“No,” she laughed, trying to picture Mr. Ren in the midst of a Sigma Delta Tau party. “No, that’s not his style.”

“Then what is his style?” Finn challenged.

“He’s quiet,” Rey mused as Rose looked up at her with love-struck eyes. “But a bit rough around the edges. Smart, but sarcastic. He keeps to himself, but he’s very thoughtful.” She hugged the white cashmere sweater she was holding to her chest. “He’s very generous.”

“Finn, look at that blush!” Rose gushed. “Don’t worry! I am going to help you pick out something gorgeous. If he’s not your boyfriend now, he will be by midterms, I guarantee it!”

Rey rolled her eyes, ignoring the flush of heat that seared through her at the thought of Mr. Ren as her boyfriend. She never should have made such a ludicrous claim to Rose and Finn. Her emotions concerning him were tangled enough already.

“I still want to meet him,” Finn grumbled. “Just to make sure he’s good enough for my Peanut.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Rey said genuinely as she and Rose shared a laugh. Finn didn’t join in, but she saw his lips turn up in a smirk.

Rose was able to help Rey put together an outfit consisting of cropped black denim jeans and a cream-colored sleeveless blouse. She wore her new black heels and put on the borrowed bracelet and necklace from Ventress’ studio. She thought she looked appropriate and casual enough for a dinner with Mr. Ren’s friends as the time ticked closer to seven. 

She decided not to borrow anything from Rose. Nothing of hers matched the outfit they had chosen, and Rey was wearing her hair down anyway, so she wouldn't need earrings. 

She said goodbye to her friends and began the precarious trek downstairs in her heels. Rey had only worn them a few times before, and was still getting used to balancing as she tried not to twist an ankle. Her thoughts had been on Mr. Ren since their clandestine conversation on Saturday night. He had been so open with her, so understanding, and her heart raced as she remembered their hushed confessions to one another.

Rey wasn’t alone anymore, she thought to herself with a smile. She had Mr. Ren, and she would be seeing him in mere minutes. It was enough to make her shiver in anticipation of the evening.

However, she had to remind herself that she was technically on the clock. Mr. Ren needed her social skills to help him navigate dinner with Hux and Phasma in the hopes of rekindling their friendship. Expectations were high, along with her hopes.

Mr. Ren was not as punctual as Mr. Rook and it took him a few extra minutes to show up. When he did, she quickly entered the front seat of the car and was face to face with her benefactor once more.

Mr. Ren appraised her with a critical eye as the September sun made its final descent on the horizon. Street lights were turning on as shadows danced across his angular, pronounced features. He was wearing glasses this evening, and while the accessory softened his appearance, the steely look in his eyes reminded her that Mr. Ren was anything but soft.

“Miss Jackson,” was his greeting, and she wondered if he had slept at all since their conversation on Saturday. He looked absolutely exhausted. 

“Good evening, Mr. Ren,” she replied steadily. “How was your trip?”

“It was extended,” he grumbled. “I've only just arrived home.” She watched as he removed his glasses and rubbed his tired eyes with his palm, stifling a yawn. 

He must feel awful, she thought to herself. The jet lag and time difference alone was enough to make anyone feel unbalanced. Add that to the lack of sleep and Rey wondered how Mr. Ren was even functional. 

“I am sorry to hear that,” she sympathized as he made his way to Hux’s apartment. “Are you sure you don't want to reschedule?”

Ren stared at her like he hadn't even considered that as an option. He looked like the kind of person who had never missed or rescheduled a meeting in his entire career. 

“No, Miss Jackson, we'd better not. Doing so on such short notice would be considered the height of rudeness.” Rey was pretty sure Mr. Ren was a walking oxymoron. The man cared so much about manners but was apt to smash his fist into glass partitions. It really was like talking to two completely different people.

“So,” he started to say. “You look...nice.”

She was momentarily stunned by the compliment, then stuttered out a short, “thank you.” She blinked at him. "What happened to Ventress?"

"Bridal fitting," he supplied. "The shop has been rented out by a client for the evening." She nodded her understanding.

There was a quick pause before Mr Ren cleared his throat with a cough. “Um,” it looked like a legitimate effort to get the words out. “How was the rest of your weekend?” It took a moment for her to realize what he was doing and she did with a start.

“Mr. Ren!” she giggled in surprise. “Are you trying to make small talk with me?” Rey watched him struggle to suppress a smile.

“I was told to practice, was I not?” He grumbled, giving her a pointed look. “Am I to wait all evening for a response?”

Rey couldn't help it, she laughed again. He could grumble all he wanted, but she could see that playful look in his eye, despite his exhaustion. “It was very productive,” she supplied. “I was able to begin preliminary sketches of my portfolio design.

“Yes,” Ren mused. “I remember seeing the details in your class syllabus.” He coughed again. “And your friends? I hope all has been resolved.”

“It has,” she said, not looking at him in the eye. If he only knew the tales she had spun to get her out of that pickle.

“Excellent,” was his crisp reply. There was amusement twinkling in his gaze when he looked at her. "Did you take notes?" He quipped, remembering their joke from Saturday night. She had to duck her head to hide her blush. She had gotten out of her awkward fight with Rose by lying about dating her benefactor. She doubted that technique would help Mr. Ren.

"Um," she stuttered. "I-I don't think it would work for you and Hux." Thankfully he didn't ask for her to explain further and the subject was dropped. 

They paused at a stop light and Ren reached into his pocket to pull out a small, black velvet case, similar to the one he had offered her on Friday night. He dropped it into her lap unceremoniously, like he was passing her popcorn instead of precious stones.

“Here,” was all he said as she gripped the case in her hands. She opened it to reveal a pair of perfect teardrop diamond earrings that dangled off of a small stud. There was no inscription on the box, and she wondered who he had borrowed these from. They were not as large as the solitaires, but the light caught on the facets of the teardrop cut in a brilliant rainbow of colors. 

She put them on without a word, wondering why Mr. Ren was staring at her so intently. The light turned green as she fastened the second earring, and they made their way through the winding streets until they approached Hux’s community. 

Rey still couldn’t tell the difference between the many similar buildings, but Ren knew where he was going as they pulled in front of a vaguely familiar apartment. He helped her out of the car and she could see that his hands were a bit unsteady as he placed one on her lower back to guide her to the door. 

She peeked up at him. “Are you ready for this?” He looked more than a little bit conflicted but nodded his head.

“With you at my side, Miss Jackson, I feel as if I could conquer anything.” Rey didn’t have a chance to do anything other than gape at his candor as he knocked firmly on the door. Hux answered it while she was still gazing up at him in thrall.

“Good evening, Ren. A pleasure to see you again, Rey.” He stepped aside to let the two enter and Rey had to stop herself from tripping over the threshold. 

“Hux,” Ren greeted, passing over a bottle of wine that she hadn’t even noticed him carry. “Thank you for having us.” Hux nodded stiffly.

“Are they here?” A female voice could be heard from the kitchen as their tall, blonde hostess entered the room. “They are! Come, into the dining room with you all.” 

Phasma led them all into the dining room as soft classical music was pumped through the warm living space. The table was only set for four people as she sat to Ren’s left, directly in front of Phasma. Without the other guests present, Rey had a moment to appreciate the tastefully decorated apartment, with its many hardwood and stone accents.

“You were missed today, during the Takodana negotiations,” Hux said to Mr. Ren as Phasma brought out a crock of soup. Ren seemed relaxed and content to be discussing work.

“I received the notes from the meeting when I landed. Anything of interest that I should know about?”

Hux shrugged. “I was able to lock them in at 12%. I feel like you could have gotten 15.”

Ren grinned a sinister and cunning smile. “Probably 18.”

“Smug bastard,” Phasma laughed as she opened the wine. “But you get the job done.”

Ren didn’t say anything to that, but he didn’t look offended, either. Rey sipped on her soup, noticing how Mr. Ren was bouncing his knee in anxiety, even though things were going quite smoothly. 

“When will you be returning to London?” Phasma asked. “Will our ‘Lord and Master’ be summoning you again soon?” She joked, making air quotes. Ren did not look amused. 

“I am to report to him for an early morning debriefing, and he wants me back in London in about a week or so.”

Rey looked up at him, remembering his phone call from London at 3:30 am. “Early morning debriefing?”

“Well yes,” Ren shifted in his seat. “Snoke will arrive at work for the day at 9 am London time, so I must be prepared to give him his morning debriefing. The overnight numbers from Asia and so forth.”

“At four in the morning?” She gasped, horror entering her tone. Was the man even allowed to sleep? “And you do this every day?”

“Well, yes,” Ren agreed, seemingly confused. For him this was completely normal when to her it was comparable to torture. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. He literally worked all hours of the day and night, traveling from country to country without any rest. Without any peace. No days off, no weekends, no time for friends or fun.

“So Rey,” Phasma said, drawing attention to her. “I know an ex-pat when I hear one. How long have you been in the US?” 

Rey gulped down her soup, preparing to share some of herself with her new acquaintances. “Well, I’ve been living here full time for a little over two years. I moved from London as soon as I graduated high school and got a student visa.” 

“I’m from London, too!” Phasma gushed, excited to meet someone from her city. “What part?”

Rey ducked her head, hesitant to answer the question as her fingers twisted together in her lap. Could she even claim a part of the city for her own? It felt like she was from nowhere since she had never stayed in one place for more than a few months. London was such a huge city, and it was hard to pinpoint any part that really stood out to her as home. 

To be honest, London had never been her home. Whether she had been in foster care or living on its streets. 

Before she could come up with some kind of lie to cover her immense hatred of London and everything she had experienced there, Ren spoke for her in a cutting and protective tone as he gripped his spoon in his white-knuckled hand.

“Do not speak to Miss Jackson about her past. It makes her uncomfortable.” Rey stared up at Mr. Ren with wide eyes as he suddenly came to her defense. He sounded angry as he glared at Hux and Phasma, his knee still bouncing wildly under the table. They did not look happy to be scolded in such a way in their own home.

Before she could stop herself, she slipped her hand under the table and placed it on his knee gently, stopping it from bouncing as she lightly squeezed. It was the first time she had ever touched him in such an intimate gesture as his entire body stilled. In fact, it was the first time she had ever touched someone on anything lower than their waist. He looked down at her with an expression she could not identify as she smiled at him softly. Then she turned to his co-workers and tried to smooth things over, her thumb running circles on his kneecap.

“Ren is right, you guys. I don’t really like talking about my time in London. I don’t plan on going back anytime soon.” She knew she had to remove her hand eventually, but she couldn’t stop focusing on the warmth of his skin as it bled through his suit pants. With a dull thud of her heart, she pulled her hand back into her lap, breaking contact with him. 

Hux still looked annoyed, but covered it with a sip of his wine. “Ren said you were a student at the college. What are you studying?”

“Engineering,” she said as Ren started drinking the soup. 

“A very lucrative subject, indeed,” Phasma supplied. “Are you interested in any particular field? Engineers these days can really take their pick of the job market.” Ren seemed to agree with Phasma as he nodded his head over the soup and looked to Rey for an answer.

She rubbed her hand on the back of her neck, instantly hesitant. “Well, there is something I’ve always wanted to do,” she trailed off, not knowing what else to say. She had never voiced her dreams out loud, too afraid that people would laugh them off or call them impossible. A kid from the streets shouldn't have dreams so big. However, for the first time, Rey found that she actually wanted to share it. She had a feeling that Mr. Ren wouldn’t think her dreams were stupid or unattainable and felt the urge to speak. “I don’t know, I’ve never told anyone this before.”

“By all means, Rey. We are all waiting on bated breath,” Hux grinned as Ren took another sip of soup. She took a deep breath and released her inhibitions, voicing her deepest dream out loud for the first time in her entire life.

“I’ve always,” she exhaled deeply, closing her eyes. “I’ve always wanted to work for NASA.”

She was waiting for some kind of reaction, but she was not prepared for Mr. Ren to start choking on his soup.

With a violent shove, he pushed himself away from the table as his coughing could be heard echoing throughout the apartment.

“Mr. Ren?” “Ren!” “Damn, Solo!” Could all be heard at the same time as he continued to pound at his chest. His eyes went wide and panicked as he tried to loosen his tie.

“Hold on!” Rey screamed, running to him and pounding him on his back like he was a punching bag. The man was so huge, she didn't know what else to do. Whatever had been lodged in his throat came free as he continued to cough into his palm. He grunted in pain and she stopped hitting him.

“Are you okay?” Rey asked in a panic while Mr. Ren straightened himself out. He glared up at Rey as if his choking were her fault.

“Am I okay?” He repeated with a sneer and raised his voice a few decibels. “Do I look okay to you?”

She put her hands on her hips, her eyes narrowing into slits of anger. “Why are you yelling at me? I didn’t do anything!”

“You seriously want to work for NASA?” He asked, almost getting into her face about it. She could not understand the violence behind his reaction. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“I’ve never told anyone this before!” She threw her hands up in the air while Hux and Phasma looked on in utter amusement. “Besides, it’s not like you asked!”

Mr. Ren was still breathing heavily, but this time through his nose, giving him the appearance of a raging bull. He glared at her intently, but she refused to move an inch as they were locked in a challenge of wills. Phasma and Hux were whispering to one another as they killed off the first bottle of wine.

“I told you this would be better than going to the movies,” Phasma said to Hux.

“You are as smart as you are beautiful, my darling,” Hux quipped.

Mr. Ren was not fond of being the center of attention and walked back towards the table, fixing his tie and smoothing his hair back. “It was a mistake on my part, I assure you.”

“You make it sound like it's a bad thing,” Rey argued, joining them all at the table again. Ren didn’t respond to her and Hux smiled into his wine glass.

“Oh to be a fly on the wall during that conversation. . .,” Hux drawled with a smirk as he made eye contact with Phasma. Rey had a creeping feeling that she was missing something very important as Ren stared daggers at his friend.

“Enough, Hux,” Ren ordered through a clenched jaw. The redhead said nothing else.

“I must say,” Phasma added with a laugh, “It seems that our big, bad, Kylo Ren has finally met his match in little miss Rey Jackson. I’ve never seen anyone stand up to him like that before.”

Rey shrugged her shoulders, looking over at Mr. Ren as he pushed away the rest of his soup with his lips turned down in a frown. “So it would seem,” was his only response.

The rest of dinner was a quiet affair. Their conversation had been focused mainly on their jobs and Rey was more than happy to stay silent after Mr. Ren’s choking episode. She simply could not understand why he had reacted so violently to her confession. While she had never admitted it out loud, working for NASA had always been the deepest, most secret dream for her future. The fact that Mr. Ren had expressed such disapproval made her feel more than a little dejected. 

Luckily, Mr. Ren was on his best behavior for the rest of the meal. He had even quipped with Hux a few times, causing both men to feel more relaxed in each other’s presence.

Before they ended their evening, Mr. Ren looked up at Phasma and Hux. “This evening has been. . . enjoyable.” He looked surprised to have admitted it out loud. 

“Yes, well, we avoided calling an ambulance, so I would call it a success,” Hux snarked.

“I wish to make this a repetitive occurrence,” Mr. Ren commanded firmly. “The four of us, having dinner together. I want us to meet every Tuesday, if we are all available.” Phasma and Hux looked stunned while Rey couldn’t help but smile. Mr. Ren was adamant in rekindling his friendship with Hux and he wasn’t going to give up.

“I might not be able to make it every Tuesday, depending on my homework schedule, but I don’t see why we can’t make it work,” she reasoned, standing at Ren’s side. Hux looked wary, but nodded.

“Capital,” Hux muttered to himself. 

“Next week, we will be dining at my apartment,” Ren declared stiffly as he started to lead Rey toward the door. “Seven pm, sharp. I will see you at work tomorrow.”

“Thanks for coming,” Phasma called as they left the apartment. Rey shivered a bit in the cool night breeze as she made her way to the car. She was incredibly proud of Mr. Ren for taking initiative and scheduling more dinners with Hux and Phasma in the future.

“You made a valid point during dinner, Miss Jackson,” Mr. Ren said as they were pulling back out onto the main road.

“I did?” She questioned, looking up at him. 

“Yes, Miss Jackson, you did,” he huffed, sounding annoyed. She couldn’t tell if he was annoyed with her or himself. “You seem to be making quite an effort to get to know me better, but I have not been as determined to know the intricacies of your life. That ends now,” he stated firmly.

“O-okay,” she stuttered, overwhelmed by his intensity. “What do you want to know?”

“Why NASA?” He asked, and she knew he was peeking at her from the corner of his eyes. “As an engineer, you could work for literally any company, anywhere in the world.”

She shrugged her shoulders, wishing his roof was down so she could look up at the night sky. The stars had always brought her comfort, no matter how much trouble had found her throughout her youth. Even at her most desperate and destitute, she had always been able to look up at the night sky and marvel at its wonders.

“I’ve never talked about this with anyone before, Mr. Ren,” she tried to explain. “I don’t really know what to say.” She took a deep breath and tried to navigate her way through the deepest dreams of her heart. “I’ve always wanted to go to space.” There was no response from Mr. Ren, so she just kept going. “My whole life, I always thought my freedom was in the stars,” she remembered, feeling wistful. “If I worked hard enough, if I was smart enough, I could work to create a new future for the entire planet. We could colonize the moon, or Mars, or discover life in a place we never thought life could exist.” She was babbling now, but once she had unlocked her feelings she could no longer keep them silent. “Mars is what fascinates me the most. It’s like an obsession. That red, desert planet with so much potential,” the possibilities always excited her when she thought about Mars. “If we could find out a way to get there, humans could start a whole new civilization.” She was a self-proclaimed space dork and could not stop gushing about her secret obsession. “I want to go. I always said I would be the first to sign up if someone planned a mission, even if it was a one-way trip.”

His eyebrow raised in surprise. “Really?” He asked. “You would leave Earth behind? Live on Mars forever, all alone?”

“Well, I’m used to being alone,” she said, avoiding the intensity of his eyes. “And I wouldn’t be leaving much behind. I never had much to begin with.” He seemed to digest this influx of information with a stiff nod.

“I see,” he sniffed. “Your goals are admirable, Miss Jackson. But you realize that NASA is not the only space-oriented organization that exists, right? You could work for any number of companies.”

“I know,” she nodded. “But it’s the only dream I’ve ever had. It got me out of London. It got me away from Plutt…”

“Who is Plutt?” Ren asked swiftly, turning his head to glare at her. She had to think fast as she froze in his intense gaze.

“No one,” she replied as he narrowed his eyes. “Just someone I knew in London.” It looked like he wanted to know more, but thankfully he didn’t ask. 

“I am sorry for my reaction during dinner,” he apologized. “I was simply caught off guard.” He seemed thoughtful or a moment. “May I ask you a more personal question?”

She shrugged, “Go ahead.”

“If you love space so much, why aren’t you minoring in astronomy?”

She thought about it for a moment as they entered the parking lot for Hoth Hall. “Well, when I came to college, I took an elective through the sociology department and it really helped me cope with a lot of my issues,” she took a deep breath. “Studying the reasons why these things happen in life helps me come to terms with the fact that it's all happened to me already,” she tried to laugh to break the tension in the car. “Besides, that’s what a master’s degree is for, right?”

He put the car in park and shut off the engine, sitting with her in the silence of the car. He looked over at her with a steely expression.

“Your fortitude is commendable, Miss Jackson. There are few people in the world that choose to better their lives, and I am more than confident that your work ethic will bring you all the success that you have ever dreamed of, even if it is on a barren, deserted planet.”

It was the nicest thing he had ever said to her. “Thank you, Mr. Ren.” This time, he did not scold her for her graciousness. 

“I will need to see you for our next lesson soon, Miss Jackson. We have a formal event on Saturday night that involves a full dinner service and I have not yet taught you the differences in flatware.” She bit her lip, wondering when they could meet again. She was supposed to work an event for CCC on Friday night and Thursday night was her evening lecture.

“The only night I am free again is tomorrow.”

“Then I shall see you tomorrow,” he said. “Mr. Rook will pick you up at 6.”

She nodded, reaching for her bag and then the door handle. “Good night.” He started the engine but she closed the door with a gasp.

“I forgot again!” She laughed, reaching in her bag for the black velvet box. “The earrings.”

She went to remove the backing from the stud in her left ear when Mr. Ren suddenly grabbed her wrist. His tone was resolute. “No.”

Rey looked up at him in confusion. “No?”

“No,” he repeated, holding her wrist firmly and not letting go. His eyes met hers over the center console as his thumb started to rub circles into her skin. “These earrings are not borrowed.”

“What?” Her voice sounded very small.

“They are yours, Miss Jackson.” Her hand started to tremble in Ren’s grasp. When he had dropped the box in her lap, that was his own twisted version of gifting someone a present. That was why he had been staring at her so intensely.

Her heart stuttered, then stopped, then stuttered back to rhythm as she shook her head wildly. 

“No, no. Mr. Ren, I cannot accept them,” she said, panic entering her tone. She couldn’t even begin to calculate the amount of money he had spent on her over the past few weeks; she was in no position to be accepting gifts from him as well. How could she ever repay him for any of this? It was simply too much and she needed to draw the line at frivolous gifts. “You need to take them back.”

His expression went curiously flat as his hand dropped from her wrist. She missed the contact instantly.

“I don’t see the problem,” he remarked coolly. “You said you had never seen diamonds before, now you are in possession of them.”

“Mr. Ren…”

“You would deny me this?” He interrupted sadly. His hands clenched into fists in his lap but he wasn’t acting violent. He looked more resigned. 

“Mr. Ren, you’ve given me so much already,” she was starting to get emotional as her voice trembled softly. She hated to look vulnerable or weak in front of anybody, but he seemed to expose every single one of her vulnerabilities for all to see. “I-I couldn’t possibly accept these.”

He refused to look at her, staring out of his window at something she couldn’t see. There wasn’t a shred of emotion in his tone. “It was not my intention to upset you, Miss Jackson.”

Her stomach was rolling in tense circles as she tried to remove the backings of the jewelry with shaky fingers. Keeping the earrings felt wrong, but giving them back to Mr. Ren felt even worse. She tucked them into their velvet case in silence as awkwardness encompassed the small interior of the car.

“I-I’m sorry,” she said, now crying softly. It was clear that her rejection of his gift was hurting them both and she didn’t know what to do.

“Don’t be sorry, Miss Jackson,” he whispered in the quiet of the car. “I meant it as a token of my gratitude, not as a means of distress.” She wanted to pass the box over to him, but the velvet seemed to stick to her fingers as her hand trembled. 

“Gratitude?’ She echoed sadly.

“Much of what I do comes from a place of pure selfishness. I’m sure even you realize that by now,” he sighed. “I told you from the very beginning that I mean to benefit from my investments in your future, Miss Jackson, and I will, that is entirely certain. However,” he looked at her through hooded lids and she couldn’t look away. “You have helped me these past few weeks. I thought the earrings would sufficiently communicate my gratitude. I was mistaken.”

Silence filled the car once more as she turned the box over in her hands, feeling the texture of the fabric against her fingertips as her heart stuttered a shaky beat in her chest. If she were being honest with herself, this was the first present she had ever received from a person. Her friends were too busy being broke college students to buy one another presents, and no one in her youth had ever deigned to give her one. 

And if she were being honest with herself, she really wanted to accept his gift. 

“I,” she choked through her emotion, feeling thoroughly overwhelmed. “I’m not very good at receiving presents, Mr. Ren. I’m not used to it.”

“And I am not used to giving presents, Miss Jackson,” he replied gently, reaching over and holding both the velvet box and her hand in his giant one. “In fact, this might be the first.” She finally looked up at him again, and the look in his eyes was a hopeful one. 

“And I want it to be for you. Take them,” he urged. “Please.”

Rey held the velvet box firmly, finally nodding at him after what felt like ages. As uncomfortable as it was to accept the expensive gift, it was even more uncomfortable rejecting it, and the tortured look in Mr. Ren’s eyes was the impetus she needed to make her choice. He didn't seem like the kind of man who said please very often.

“Alright,” she said, tucking the diamond earrings into her bag. “I’ll take them.”

“Thank you,” he breathed.

“Shouldn’t I be the one saying that?” She asked with a shake of her head. 

“No,” he stated simply as he started the car. “I will see you tomorrow.”

She exited the car without another word, her heart tattooing a rhythm she had never heard before onto her chest with every step she took from Mr. Ren’s car. Rey turned to watch him pull away, seeing the red taillights zoom down the road as he sped off into the night. She ran up to her bedroom like the devil was at her heels, breathing a sigh of relief that Rose was not home when she arrived. 

She took the earrings out once more in the empty silence of her dorm room, her desk side lamp the only light for which to see. The dim light danced off of them as colors shimmered, and when she closed her eyes tightly the lingering light in her vision looked like twinkling stars as she clutched the velvet case to her heart and cried.


	8. Table Manners

Rey couldn't stop looking at the earrings.

It hadn't even been a full day since Mr. Ren had gifted her the jewels and she must have peeked at them over a dozen times. Every time she did her heart made a little pang in her chest, and she couldn't tell whether or not it was a good thing. Right now they were hiding at the bottom of her top desk drawer, and she didn't want Rose to know that they were there. She might be able to explain away the nights out and the new clothes, but she would never be able to come up with a reasonable enough excuse to cover up the diamonds that had been gifted to her. 

It was still overwhelming to think about Mr. Ren’s present and the feelings it elicited in her. His token of gratitude had hit her in a secret spot she had never realized was there, and now it was getting harder and harder to push away the tender emotions that were being associated with her benefactor. His generosity, his tenderness towards her, his attentiveness; it was starting to blur the lines of their already shaky relationship. Add that to the fact that Rose and Finn thought they were dating and it was enough to send her feelings into a tailspin.

It was hard for Rey to admit it, but she was pretty sure she was starting to develop a crush on Mr. Ren.

What else could these feelings be? Why else would she be thinking of him at all hours of the day and night? It explained the stuttering of her heart and the butterflies in her stomach whenever he was around, and her ridiculous urges to touch him. The logical conclusion was staring her in the face despite her hesitance to admit it.

Because if she thought about it too hard, her thoughts eventually turned to the inevitable truth. 

He wasn't interested in her. Mr. Ren had made that completely clear when they had begun their arrangement, and had done nothing to make her doubt his original claim. She couldn't get distracted by her emotions when their relationship was strictly business. He was older than her by at least ten years, was a world-class professional in the business sector, and had more money than she could ever hope to make in her life. What would he want with a poor street-rat like her?

It was foolish to think such things about her benefactor. She had to stop.

But then she looked at the earrings again and the cycle of her conflicted feelings began once more. Kylo Ren, Ben Solo… How could she separate her feelings for him when she was also claiming to date some collegiate version of him? When he gave her diamond earrings as if it meant nothing? She was only human, and her heart was still a stranger to many of the thoughts and sensations coursing through her. It was frustrating and confusing and she didn’t know how to process it all. 

Her cell phone beeped and she received a text from Ren. 

_A6221- the code to get upstairs._

She was confused before remembering that she needed a private elevator code to get to his penthouse apartment. The clock ticked closer to six and Rey knew she had to leave soon.

“You're going out again?" Rose asked as she peeked up over her chemistry textbook and saw Rey grabbing her bag and jacket. Rose shot Rey a knowing smile and she had to look away so Rose couldn't see the blush on her face. It felt like it had been there all day, whether it was a light pink dusting on her cheeks or a vibrant flush down her neck.

“Yes,” she answered, hating how her voice shook. “We are having dinner tonight.”

“That’s two nights in a row!” Rose gushed. “Rey, this is amazing!”

“No,” she denied, shaking her head. She had to stop pretending that she and Mr. Ren were something they weren't or else her emotions would be twisted up forever. “It's really not.”

“What do you mean?” Rose asked with a pout.

“He’s not my boyfriend, Rose. We just hang out and talk,” she tried to be firm but Rose didn’t look like she believed her.

“Well, what do you talk about?” She asked flippantly, typing away at her computer.

“We talk about school,” she explained. “We talk about our problems. It's hard for him to talk to anyone and I'm pretty much the first person to get him to open up. That's the extent of our relationship."

“For now it is,” Rose added. “But who knows what could happen!”

“I don’t know, Tico,” Rey grimaced. “He’s not interested in being anything more than friends right now, and I think it’s for the best.”

Rose narrowed her eyes at her. “But you're still going to dinner with him?”

She had to avoid her roommate's steely gaze. Sometimes it felt like Rose noticed too much as she was being analyzed by her friend. “We like spending time with one another.” 

It was the lamest thing she could think of on such short notice, but it was the truth. It's not like she could admit that she was being paid to spend time with him and coach him in his social skills. Mr. Ren might be a bit distant, and cold, and critical, but she genuinely enjoyed spending time with him.

What did that say about her?

Rose crossed her arms in front of her chest as she stood up from her desk to say goodbye to Rey. “I still think you'll be dating by midterms.”

Rey went over to her desk drawer and slipped the velvet box into her bag stealthily, without revealing it to Rose. “You and Finn can take bets, but count me out.”

“You're no fun,” Rose complained while she hugged her roommate. 

“I'll see you later,” Rey called as she made her way out of their room. Mr. Rook was already waiting patiently for Rey as she climbed into the backseat of the car. They pulled out onto the main road and Rey removed the velvet box from her bag. She slipped the earrings on with a slam of her heart as they drove into the city center.

Corellia, New York was an industrial suburb of Manhattan that rested in the foothills of northern Westchester county. Her campus was located on the outskirts of town, where winding avenues tapered off into the long country roads of southern New York state. The city center was modern and bustling with commerce and entertainment. High rises and skyscrapers were not as tall as their Manhattan counterparts, but still just as architectural and imposing. Mr. Ren lived in a building called The Hosnian Prime, and the outside looked familiar as Mr. Rook dropped her off.

A doorman greeted her warmly at the front desk, and she gave the man Mr. Ren’s name. He looked confused as he repeated it.

“Kylo Ren? I'm sorry, we don't have a resident here by that name.” Rey shook her head and tried again.

“Oh, well,” she rubbed the back of her neck nervously. “He probably goes by his real name at home. Ben Solo.”

The doorman looked stunned. “You're a guest of Mr. Solo?” He started typing in his computer. “He has an elevator code, I'll have to call him…”

“There's no need,” Rey said warmly. “He gave it to me already.” The man gaped at her, open-mouthed.

“He did?” The man looked like he could have been knocked over with a feather. He pointed at the elevator. “By all means.” 

Rey walked past him, wondering why the man looked so shocked. Even as she approached the elevator, she could still feel the doorman's eyes on her. She quickly entered the elevator and punched in the code that would bring her up to Mr. Ren’s apartment. As she ascended, Rey pulled her hair back into a low ponytail, revealing the earrings so he would be able to see them. They were far more formal than her casual outfit of blue jeans and a purple blouse, but she needed to wear them. It was important to show him that his present was both accepted and appreciated.

He was waiting for her at the door when the elevator opened, revealing the most relaxed incarnation of Mr. Ren yet. He was in a black t-shirt and soft grey sweatpants, looking more casual than she had ever seen him. His hair was wet, likely from a shower, and her mouth went dry when she noticed that his hair was pulled back into a high bun. It made his already prominent ears stick out in the most adorable way as he stared at her from the threshold.

The earrings felt like boulders hanging off of her ears as his eyes landed on them. His eyebrows raised imperceptibly as he moved away from the entrance to his apartment.

“Welcome back, Miss Jackson,” he greeted warmly and she noticed he was barefoot. 

“Hello, Mr. Ren,” she said, tucking a strand of flyaway hair behind her ear. He still hadn’t said anything about the earrings and she wondered if he was going to comment on them at all. She entered the open living space and wondered what floor they were on as she stared out over a breathtaking view of the wilderness beyond the city. The purple shadows of mountain foothills could be seen in the distance as she approached the long dining room table that was laden with food.

“Mr. Ren,” Rey said apprehensively as she took in the place settings. “Why is there so much food?”

“This is lesson number two. We must practice, Miss Jackson,” was his stiff response. She was trying to avoid looking at the attractive face that his pulled-back hair had revealed. “Dinner on Saturday will be a formal affair, and there will be multiple courses. There is much to learn this evening.”

She summoned up the courage to turn around and was instantly caught in the earthy hues of his eyes. With a deep breath, she pushed her shimmering feelings down into the depths of her heart as she steadied herself for the evening ahead.

“Then let’s get started,” a tremulous breath escaped her as he continued to stare at her. Without breaking eye contact, he pulled out the chair next to her.

“After you,” he murmured lowly as she sat down.

She sat down in the chair and had the inane urge to shake out her limbs of the excess energy she felt jolting through her nerves. He wasn’t saying much, but everything about his presence and demeanor tonight was intense and overwhelming. 

“The dinner will be a minimum of four courses,” he started to explain as he sat down.

“Four?” Rey interrupted. “Why would someone eat that much food?”

“The portions are small, Miss Jackson,” Ren explained patiently. “And the services are timed so that people are not eating too much food in one sitting.”

Her face twisted in confusion. “So how long does it take?”

Ren looked thoughtful. “Well, most dinner services can last up to two, even three hours.”

“Three hours?” Rey was stunned. Most of the time when she ate, the entire plate would be gone in less than five minutes. “Why would someone want to eat for so long?”

“Well, it’s also meant for socialization,” he continued. “Many people converse in the space between courses. Different alcohol might also be served depending on the dish, but that will not concern you.”

“Will you?” She asked, genuinely interested. His eyebrow raised in confusion.

“Will I what?”

“Will you be conversing with others?” She clarified. “Is this a work event or a social event?”

He thought about his response before answering slowly. “It will be a social event for the guests, but it will be a work event for me.”

She shook her head in confusion. “I’m not following.” He looked away from her, distracted by something outside of the window. 

“My boss has tasked me with something of a mission, Miss Jackson. We are going to this dinner because I have been ordered to do so.” For some reason, his explanation made her stomach twist in a tight knot, making her feel uneasy.

“What kind of mission?” She was almost afraid to ask, but he was a businessman, not some kind of assassin. What could he possibly do at a formal dinner party?

“I am trying to arrange a meeting between my boss and a very stubborn associate,” he explained moodily. “This person will not meet with Mr. Snoke and he believes that I will be able to persuade them to do so.”

“Doesn’t your boss live in London?” She questioned.

“He will be coming back to New York in December and wants to arrange the meeting now.” He punctuated his statement with a tired yawn. He must have had a long day at work.

She thought about it for a moment and tried to will away the sense of unease that crept into her consciousness. Whenever he mentioned his boss she was filled with a sudden sense of foreboding that she could not place. Rey watched as he reached over and started to fill her plate with food. 

“Do you think it will work?” She asked him as he passed her a dish filled with salad. “I mean, no offense Mr. Ren, but you still have issues trying to make small talk with me. Do you think you’re ready for this?”

Mr. Ren filled his wine glass with a deep Burgundy, avoiding eye contact with Rey. “Luckily I know this person already, so it shouldn't be too difficult,” the sound of pouring wine filled the air. She looked down at her own glass and recognized the green can of ginger ale in front of her. She poured herself some as Ren continued. “And I also have you, so I think it should be fine.”

She covered up her blush with a sip of soda as he ended their conversation and began their lesson on table settings. He was slow and methodical with his instructions, asking her to repeat most of what he said before watching her use them in practice. Every course of the meal was another lesson, starting with salad, then moving on to appetizers, the main course, and finally dessert.

Rey didn’t know where he had ordered the food from, but every morsel of it was absolutely delicious and she was trying to remember both her table manners and her table settings at the same time. She could feel his eyes on her throughout the meal, and she found herself getting distracted by the intensity of his gaze as he scrutinized her eating habits.

“Elbows off the table,” he scolded as they finished their main dish. She quickly removed them with a grimace as he yawned again.

He had been doing that all evening, and it made Rey think about their conversation from the night before. Mr. Ren hardly ever slept, and when he did, it was constantly interrupted by the demands of his job. She sympathized with him and wished there was something she could do to help.

“Mr. Ren, can I ask you a question?” She peeked up at him and he seemed receptive.

“Go ahead.”

“When was the last time you took a day off?” He looked thoughtful for a moment while he chewed on his coq au vin. 

“January 28, 2012,” he stated simply. 

“Six years ago?” She questioned, feeling absolutely aghast. “You haven’t taken a day off in six years?”

“Well, that wasn’t a day off. I had the flu and Snoke ordered that I stay home,” he clarified.

“So when was the last time you took a day off? For a vacation, or a mental health day.”

“A mental health day?” He echoed. “What the hell is that?”

“A day you take off of work because you’re feeling tired and overwhelmed and the last thing you want to do is work,” she explained. “You stay home, get more sleep, run errands you’ve been putting off. It’s like pressing the restart button when things get to be too much in life. College kids take them all the time.”

He shook his head, his lips turned down in a pronounced grimace. “I have never taken a vacation day, Miss Jackson. Neither for leisure nor for mental health.”

“You accumulate them through your job, do you not?”

“Yes, all employees do, but very few actually take one.”

“Well, maybe you should,” she offered, not unkindly. “I think you could use a day off, Mr. Ren. I have a feeling it would do you a lot of good.”

Mr. Ren shook his head, trying to brush off her suggestion as he cleared the dinner plates from the table. “I am too important at my job, Miss Jackson. I would be reprimanded for certain. Taking a day off for such frivolous reasons is not what employees at First Order do.”

She watched him walk away with a frown, wondering why he would want to work in a place that didn’t provide their employees with any freedoms. Sure, he was successful, and he made a lot of money, but the man seemed to be nothing more than a machine half the time with the way he viewed his life. He didn’t even try to make time for himself, always putting work first.

When Mr. Ren returned to the table he had dessert with him, and placed a small dish filled with a chocolate confection in front of her. 

“What’s this?” She asked, looking at the fluffy pudding.

“It’s chocolate mousse,” he stated simply. “One of my preferred desserts.” Rey had never been a dessert person, since it had been difficult enough trying to afford nutritious food that kept her alive and healthy. Sugar and chocolate had never been on her list of priorities. 

“Use the smallest spoon,” he ordered, watching her as she scooped up a small bite. When the creamy dessert hit her tongue, she was unprepared for the burst of chocolate flavor to envelop her senses.

“Oh my god,” she muttered, swallowing the whipped chocolate. “That is the most amazing thing I have ever put in my mouth.” Her eyes widened when she realized what she had said. It was too late to take back the embarrassing statement as his eyes narrowed at her. She stopped herself from saying anything else stupid by shoving more dessert in her mouth. 

He quietly started eating the mousse as well, peeking up at her during random times with an odd expression on his face. She was trying to ignore it by focusing on the delicious dessert that she was currently enjoying. The confection was quickly becoming her new favorite food as she scraped the sides of the cup for every morsel of chocolate, contented noises spilling from her with every bite.

She was anticipating licking the spoon clean when Mr. Ren’s fist suddenly came crashing down on the table in a loud bang. The china, the flatware, and the dishes all rattled on the top of the dining table as she stared at Mr. Ren in shock. He was glaring down at her with a look in his eyes that he had never directed at her before. He looked absolutely furious as she glared at the monster known as Kylo Ren.

“That is enough!” He yelled at her, his body practically vibrating with anger. She stiffened, wondering what it was she had done to inspire such violence from him. While she knew him to be an angry person, this was a completely different incarnation of his ire as she summoned her courage to face him. 

She might be afraid of her feelings for him, but she was definitely not afraid of him.

“Enough of what?” She asked calmly, carefully placing her spoon next to her dish. She crossed her arms over her chest while he shifted in his seat. He looked more than a little uncomfortable as he addressed her.

“Your actions are completely inappropriate and they must cease immediately,” he demanded coldly. She had no idea what he was talking about. All she was doing was enjoying her dessert.

“If you would inform me of my inappropriate actions I might be able to do something about it,” she challenged as anger entered her tone as well.

He huffed once, his entire body shaking as he shifted in his seat again. “You-” he trailed off as his exposed ears turned bright red. “You moan when you eat, Miss Jackson. Do not pretend to claim ignorance of this.”

Horror slammed into her as she gasped in offense. “I do not moan when I eat!” She screeched, her mortification drowning her. Then the connotations hit her and her eyes widened in shock. “And even if I did, it’s only because I find the food to be delicious!”

“You should not be moaning in public, Miss Jackson!” He continued, and the trajectory of their conversation was careening into uncharted territory as embarrassment threatened to swallow her whole. “It creates uncomfortable situations for everyone involved.”

“Is that why you’re so mad?” She challenged as she took in his stiff and surly demeanor. If he wanted to play with fire, he was going to get burned. “Have I created an uncomfortable situation for you?”

Mr. Ren glared at her with murder in his eyes as she realized exactly what she had just asked him. With bated breath she waited for some kind of response as he stayed seated and proved her right.

Her body did not know how to react to this information as every nerve ending in her body came alive. 

“Your claim is preposterous, Miss Jackson, as is your behavior.” As cold as his tone was, there was a fire in his gaze that lit her up from the inside out.

“My behavior? I was the one being accused of causing discomfort with my eating habits, Mr. Ren. You must see me as some kind of pervert.”

“A pervert? No. A temptation and a distraction? Yes.” His teeth lingered on the ‘s’ in a low hiss. They stared at each other, eyes locking in yet another battle of wills. She seemed to be doing that a lot with him lately. 

“I’ll have to be more vigilant of my behavior then,” she quipped, and for the first time in her life she could claim that her tone was flirtatious. “I wouldn’t want to be a distraction during your mission on Saturday.”

His eyes narrowed dangerously, and he shifted in his seat once more before standing to clear the dessert plates. When he stood she tried desperately not to look down at his sweatpants, where she was sure there would be evidence of his discomfort. However, she glanced at him in passing and did not see any proof that she was as tempting as he had claimed as the blush returned with a vengeance.

“I’ll be right back,” she said as he started to clean the table of the leftover food. “Where is the bathroom?” He pointed down the hallway and she started to walk towards it. She could feel his eyes lingering on her back as she retreated from the room and closed the door with a small slam.

The large, spacious bathroom had a sunken bathtub and a separate shower, all carved from slabs of dark grey and black marble. Chrome detailing on the fixtures and sink reflected back her image in every size, shape and proportion as she looked at her reflection in the lighted mirror.

Her heart was still racing over the implications of their argument. It was hard for her to even think the words to herself as she looked up and forced herself to say it out loud.

“I think I just gave Mr. Ren a hard on,” she breathed to herself in the emptiness of the bathroom. Heart pounding, she rubbed her legs together as an ache burned inside of her. 

She didn’t know how to interpret his behavior. He was a guy, and she had read that this kind of thing happened to them all the time, so how could she be certain? Did Mr. Ren have feelings for her? Was he simply attracted to her? Was it an involuntary response from the moaning and he actually felt nothing for her at all? She didn’t know, and he was such a difficult man to understand, even with her uncanny abilities to see beyond his angry facade. 

This whole topic was unfamiliar domain for Rey, and she was already confused enough by her own feelings. Having to take Mr. Ren’s into consideration was enough to send her into a tailspin. He had yelled at her and called her behavior inappropriate. In fact, he was always yelling at her, over some issue or another. Wasn’t that reason enough to believe he wasn’t interested in her? It was probably best to just go back out there and pretend that everything was normal. This was nothing more than another mishap in their already wild relationship.

But when she exited the bathroom, she couldn’t see him in the kitchen anymore. The dishwasher was running, and the dining room table was clean, but she couldn’t see her benefactor anywhere.

She entered the living room and saw his tall frame stretched out on his black leather sofa, dead asleep as he nestled his head on the arm rest. The length of him spanned the entire couch and his bare feet dangled over the other side. In the few minutes she had been hiding in the bathroom, he had completely passed out on her.

A twang of sympathy replaced the awkwardness from before as she took in the gentle expression on his face. His hair was still pulled back in bun with flyaways everywhere, and she could almost count the number of moles and birthmarks on his left cheek. She crouched low to the ground so her face could be at eye level with his. He was so tall that she had never been this close to his face before.

It felt like she was staring at him for hours, even though she knew it was only moments. His wide mouth and full lips were relaxed as he breathed lightly, and she had to resist the sudden and overwhelming urge she felt to touch them. To see if they were truly as soft as they looked. 

Thankfully she was able to control herself, and instead grabbed the short throw blanket that had been draped over the side of the couch. She placed it over him and had to suppress a chuckle at how little it covered his giant frame. A loud noise shocked her out of her quiet observance and she realized that it was his cell phone ringing on the kitchen counter. Rook’s name flashed on the screen and she picked it up as her benefactor shifted on the couch.

“Hello?” She answered.

“Uh, Miss Rey?” The shocked British accent made her smile. She and Mr. Rook had never conversed besides thank yous and your welcomes. “I’m downstairs.”

“Thank you, Mr. Rook. I’ll be there shortly.” Mr. Ren blinked his eyes open, and looked at Rey in a fuzzy, unfocused way.

“Rey?” He asked softly, calling her by her name as her breath hitched. She went over to the couch and crouched in front of him once more.

“Yes, Mr. Ren? I’m right here,” he looked over at her, and he still seemed half asleep. “It’s time for me to go.” He shook his head and closed his eyes once more.

“Saturday,” he grumbled. “I’m picking you up early. 1 pm.”

“Alright,” she agreed steadily. He opened his eyes once more. A hand reached over to tuck a tendril of hair behind Rey’s ear. It lingered on the curve of her shell, fingers drifting down and toying with the diamond dangling from the lobe.

“Wear these again,” he whispered to her, never breaking contact with her.

“I will,” she promised as her legs wobbled under her crouching weight. He closed his eyes and they did not open again as he dropped his hand and his breathing finally evened out. 

With a tentative reach and bated breath, she smoothed the flyaway tendrils of his hair back away from his face, tucking them behind his ear the same way he had done to her. With one last peek of his sleeping form, she smiled at the figure on the couch, hoping he was able to truly get some rest before the demands of his job woke him again.

“Good night, Mr. Ren,” was the last thing she whispered into the quiet apartment, closing the door with a soft thud. If she had waited a moment longer, she would have seen the soft smile on her benefactor’s face before he had finally passed out for real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a bit shorter than the previous ones, but I had to get it out of the way before the first big event. Stay tuned, that one is going to be a monster!


	9. Subterfuge

True to his word, Mr. Ren began texting her to see if she was prepared for their first formal dinner at a very early hour on Saturday morning. She had spent the previous night working an event for CCC and was not anticipating the numerous text messages he had started sending her at 9am. All of them were various commands and bits of information to prepare her for their first foray into society.

_Shower but leave your hair wet. Do not wear makeup._

_Bring a bag to store your regular clothes in._

_I am not sure when we will be returning._

Every time he texted her, she responded with a simple “OK” or “no problem.” She still felt awkward about their last dinner together and how nothing had been resolved between them. Rey didn’t even know what version of Mr. Ren to expect when he arrived. Would it be the quiet, thoughtful, generous Ben Solo? Or the brash, angry, insensitive Kylo Ren?

She didn’t know, and she couldn’t be sure by the short messages he had been sending her. They had not communicated at all since Wednesday, even though he had constantly been in her thoughts. Every time she remembered their fight during dessert her body lit up like a candle, and she didn’t know how it was going to affect the day ahead. 

One thing was certain, if Rey wanted to survive this night she needed to focus, and bury any and all thoughts of Mr. Ren under a heavy guise of professionalism. She had a job to do tonight, a mission, whatever it was. It was up to her to help Mr. Ren succeed.

Rose and her sister Paige had gone home to Long Island for the weekend, leaving Rey in the dorm room alone. For the first time in her life she welcomed the solitude as she reread Ren’s message about coming home late. Answering Rose’s questions were already difficult enough, she didn’t want to explain why she was staying out with Mr. Ren until the late hours of the night.

Rey took a short run in the morning, then ate a late breakfast and showered as per Mr. Ren’s request. She left her hair wet, twisting it up into a tight bun, remembering the way Mr. Ren had worn it during their dinner. She tried not to think about it too hard as she slipped the borrowed jewelry from Ventress and her diamond earrings into her oversized bag.

She wore casual clothes out the door, and at 1 pm she saw a familiar town car pull up in the parking lot outside of Hoth Hall. Mr. Rook was driving, and when the car stopped, Mr. Ren exited the backseat. He was not yet dressed for the event as she took in his navy sweater and black denim jeans. He stood in the cool September breeze, holding the door open for her with an unreadable expression on his face.

It was her first time facing him since their argument and she stood her ground, prepared for whatever version of him was in control. 

“Good afternoon, Miss Jackson,” was his deep and warm greeting. So far, so good. 

“Hello Mr. Ren,” Rey passed by him with a small smile as he watched her enter the car. She scooted over to the opposite side as he climbed in after her. While she had driven with him many times before, they had never shared a backseat, and had always been separated by a center console. Now it felt like she didn’t know where to put her arms or legs as his giant frame took up a sizeable amount of space.

“How was the rest of your week?” Mr. Ren asked as they pulled onto the main road. He was being just as aloof as ever and she couldn’t get a good read on his feelings yet.

“I worked a long event last night,” she supplied. “I didn’t get home until about 1am.”

“You might have another one tonight, Miss Jackson. We have a very far distance to travel.”

“Where are we going?” She asked.

“To the Canto Bight casino in Atlantic City.”

“New Jersey?” She questioned with a tilt of her head. “I’ve never been to New Jersey before!”

“You’re not missing much,” he grumbled. “It’s like Diet New York. Everything looks the same, but the taste is slightly terrible.” He wrinkled his nose like he smelled something bad.

Rey couldn’t stop a small giggle from escaping her. “I’ll take your word for it. I’ve never been to a casino before either.” He glanced at her knowingly. 

“Yes, well, that I could have guessed. But we will not be gambling tonight. The event will take place in the casino’s banquet hall.”

“How long will it take to get there?” She wondered.

“Almost three hours, depending on traffic. Thus the reason why I have summoned you so early. Ventress is expecting us shortly. We must both be dressed and then we begin our descent into hell,” a teasing grin lifted his cheek. “I mean New Jersey.”

She laughed again, feeling more at ease with him with every passing moment. She had not been expecting this jovial, light-hearted banter and was enjoying it thoroughly. She had expected him to be angry, annoyed, awkward, or nervous. Maybe all four mixed together. Rey had definitely not been expecting the giggles and grins that were presently being shared between them. 

“You seem to be ready for your mission,” she added, hating how his shoulders suddenly tensed up. She cursed herself for mentioning it and breaking the casual mood between them, but he simply shook his head. 

“The nerves will come later, Miss Jackson. Right now I am trying to enjoy whatever good mood I have been able to summon.” His eyes narrowed at her in a playful way. “I got some extra sleep this week. It seems to have improved my demeanor.”

“I can see that,” she mused, fighting back a grin that threatened to split her face in half. “It suits you.”

Oh boy, did it suit him well. Just an ounce of humor completely transformed both his attitude and his body language as he looked genuinely relaxed for the first time in their entire acquaintance. The man even looked like he was lounging as he sank back into the leather cushions and tried to stretch his legs out. He didn’t get very far in the cramped backseat, but their ankles were now curiously close together as she angled her knees towards him. 

His relaxed demeanor reminded her of Wednesday night. She could remember the contented look on his face as he slept, and the gentle way she had returned his tender gesture. His hair had been just as silky as she’d imagined when she tried to tame it back from his face. She longed to run her fingers through it again, now that it was down and loose around his jaw.

“So what’s the plan?” She ducked her head towards him, conspiratorially. “How are we going to succeed at the mission?” It felt like they were scheming together as his brow lifted knowingly.

“I have already planted the seeds of our success, Miss Jackson. I can only hope they come to fruition tonight.”

“You said you know this person,” she urged, wanting to know more about the plan. “Do you work with them or is it a personal acquaintance?” He hadn’t mentioned a single person outside of his job besides his family, and she knew he had a rocky relationship with them.

Mr. Ren looked slightly uncomfortable as he glanced away from her. “Personal,” he grumbled. “Very personal.”

Rey didn’t know how to interpret his words as silence stretched around them. He didn’t look like he wanted to elaborate so she let the subject drop. She would be meeting this person tonight anyway. As they got closer to Ventress’ boutique she could sense him becoming more and more closed off as he hid into himself once more.

Ventress greeted both her and Ren at the door with a warm smile. “The ladies are waiting for you in the back,” she said, lifting her arm towards the curtain that separated the work room and the boutique. Rey looked up at Mr. Ren only to catch him staring down at her with a look of hesitance in his eyes. He looked like the curtain would bring him into another dimension, and she instinctively knew that he was not looking forward to the evening ahead. They walked in silence into the back room and it felt like Mr. Ren was already attached to her side when the evening hadn’t even begun.

“Good luck,” she called to him as two familiar assistants started to pull her toward the makeup table. He didn’t look happy to be dragged towards the tailor.

Rey’s back was to the workroom as the makeup artist started working on her. Ventress kept calling out commands that demanded Rey look older and more sophisticated as she steamed Rey’s dress.

“She will probably be the youngest person there, don’t make her look like it.” It made Rey wonder as to the kind of party they were attending. When the woman stepped out of Rey’s line of view, she had to do a double take at what she saw.

Rey had never looked so beautiful in her life, she was sure of it. Dark, smoky eyes made her look more like a vixen than she had ever felt as it was paired with a blood-red lipstick. Her jaw and cheekbones were contoured to be far more angular than normal as the hair stylist dried her hair and pulled it up into an elaborate twist.

When she exited the makeup chair, Mr. Ren was still nowhere to be seen. She was waiting to be dressed and wondered what outfit she would wear. Part of her desperately wanted to wear the midnight blue gown of her dreams. The one that made her look like a walking constellation. It was the kind of dress that a kid from the streets should never have imagined, and for Rey it was so close to her reach she could almost feel the fabric on her body.

She had to hide her disappointment when a dress the same shade as her vibrant lipstick was brought out on a mannequin. It was an elaborate cut that exposed the majority of her back and shoulders as strappy lines of silk fabric criss-crossed around her neck. The material was light and flowy as she slipped it over her head with the help of the assistants. They made it so her hair hadn’t moved a millimeter as they adjusted the garment on her body. Tall, open toed stilettos finished the ensemble and Rey struggled to keep her balance in them.

The assistants placed her clothes in her spare bag, and removed both her earrings and the jewelry she had borrowed from the last event she had been dressed for. Hux’s birthday dinner felt like a million years ago when it had barely been a week since the event. So much had changed since then, it was hard for Rey to fathom it all as she placed the earrings on with a small smile.

“They are absolutely exquisite,” Ventress commented as she passed Rey a pair of red, elbow-length silk gloves. She slipped them on and felt far more older than her scant twenty years. “You look quite fine tonight, Miss Jackson.”

“Yes, you do indeed,” was the warm interjection from behind her. She felt her heart thud once before she gathered the courage to turn around and face her benefactor.

Mr. Ren was wearing a black tuxedo with silk lining around the lapel and cuffs. His double breasted jacket was paired with a red striped pocket square, and a sharp black bowtie. The vest was also black, but she could see some red fibers woven into the material. His hair was loose and wavy, brushed to the side in a way that made him look almost regal. His eyes lingered on her frame for far longer than was necessary, but she made no protest. In fact, she welcomed it.

“You look quite fine yourself, Mr. Ren.” A light dusting of red was prominent on his pale cheeks, but he hummed in appreciation.

“I do believe we are ready to go, Miss Jackson.” He was talking to Ventress, but his eyes stayed on Rey. “Thank you, Ventress. You have done quite well.”

“When I am given a canvas as lovely as you two, my job is incredibly easy.” She was still caught in Ren’s gaze as her stylist's words wrapped around them. Mr. Ren held out an arm for Rey to take. She held onto it and was amazed at the strength she felt beneath the suit jacket as he led her out of the store.

Rey had to take a few deep breaths as she entered the car before Ren. Her emotions were spiraling out of control as her mind slipped into some kind of elaborate fantasy that involved her and Mr. Ren. She had never looked so fine, and he had never looked so handsome. His gentleness and humor was softening her regard for him and the entire experience felt like a fairy tale. The poor, wretched girl getting swept away by her rich and dashing Prince Charming. Wasn’t that what every girl dreamed of?

But Mr. Ren was the furthest thing from a Prince Charming as his entire presence filled up the back seat of the car. She had to ignore the way he was looking at her. She had to pretend that she didn’t want to run her fingers through his locks. She had to stop her heart from beating out this now familiar rhythm whenever Mr. Ren was around.

It was past three o’clock, so they would not be arriving in Atlantic City for hours. Mr. Ren didn’t seem to be in a hurry as Mr. Rook got caught in lingering New York City traffic while crossing over the George Washington bridge.

Rey was toying with her gloves, never having worn them before this evening. She couldn’t stop rubbing her hands together and feeling the smooth material on her fingertips. She had also kicked off her shoes for the time being, not seeing a reason to wear them in the car.   
The city backdrop slowly melted away into the more suburban landscapes of eastern New Jersey as the car made its way south on I-95. Rey was fascinated by the forests and corn fields that passed her by, since she had always been accustomed to city life. Mr. Ren was quiet throughout the car ride, removing his cell phone from his pocket to check and send random messages for work. It was a comfortable silence that Rey was enjoying before she felt Mr. Ren’s eyes on her once more.

“You’re wearing them.” Ren’s low voice reached across the backseat of the car and made her shiver in her sleeveless dress. She knew he was talking about the earrings as goosebumps trailed down her arms.

She glanced up at him from her gloves. “You asked me to.”

“So I did,” was his low response. “Do,” he coughed once, clearing his throat. “Do you like them?”

Her eyes widened at the slight tremor of fear in his voice. “Yes, very much so.” She wanted so badly to touch him, and reassure him in some way that she liked her gift, but she kept her hands firmly in her lap. “I wasn’t lying when I said it was my first real present, Mr. Ren.”

“I guessed as much,” he said, looking thoughtful. “It’s a curious thing.”

Her brow lifted in confusion. “What is?”

“Seeing you wear them,” he provided. “I didn’t know it would make me so. . . happy.”

She grinned then, and he looked mortified to have revealed such a thing to her. “I think that’s the whole point of giving presents to people, Mr. Ren,” she laughed. “And just so you know, it makes me happy to wear them.”

A frown was directed at her, but she could tell that there was no fire behind it. “Then there seems to be some merit behind this whole ‘gift-giving’ thing. I might have to do it more often.” 

Now it was Rey’s turn to frown, and the emotional conflict that had been brewing inside of her all week was coming to a boiling point once more. “Mr. Ren, you can’t keep giving me presents like this. You give me enough just by paying for my tuition, let alone the laptop and the clothes. You shouldn’t give me anything else.”

“Why not? I believe that we have both firmly established that it makes us happy when I do so.” Rey opened her mouth to battle with him once more, but was stunned to feel his finger press lightly on her lips, stopping her from stating her opinions on his generosity.

“Miss Jackson,” Ren pleaded, and he had leaned in so close to her that she could see the swirling browns of his eyes. “Can we please go through one evening together without us arguing with one another?”

She was so stunned by his request she could barely stutter a response. “S-says the self-proclaimed king of arguments!”

“Tonight requires us to engage in a bit of subterfuge,” he had removed his finger, leaving her lips tingling from the loss of contact. He still leaned in close to her, near enough that she could feel his warm breath tickle her cheek. “We need to be on our best behavior tonight or else none of it will work. It’s hard enough trying to control my temper, and while I do enjoy engaging you in our many disagreements, tonight is neither the time nor the place to do so. ” He gulped as his jaw worked around nothing. “Can you do this for me?” The look in his eyes was as close to begging as Mr. Ren could get, and she swallowed up her many protests with a heavy sigh.

“Fine,” she breathed, moving back from him and breaking the trance that had fallen between them. “I will be on my best behavior, as will you.”

Ren nodded, and when his cell phone beeped once more, Rey was grateful for the distraction as their conversation was dropped. 

It was another forty-five minutes until they started to see signs for Atlantic City. Rey could feel the anticipation building for the night ahead as she slipped her shoes back on and fiddled with her red clutch. Mr. Ren was silent once more, shutting his cell phone off for the evening as the car pulled up in front of the Canto Bight casino.

Mr. Rook drove past the main entrance, where Rey could see a plethora of patrons gambling away at bright, loud machines. Instead, they were pulled around to the far side of the building, where the front of a large banquet hall was decorated by flowers and spotlights. 

Rook came around to let Rey and Mr. Ren out of the car. She looked up at her benefactor as he held her arm out for her to take. 

“Rey,” his voice rumbled between them, calling her by her name in a way that made her toes curl in her stilettos. “Would you do me the honor of taking my arm for the evening?”

Her mouth was completely dry as she nodded up at him, looping her left arm around his and standing firmly at his side as they entered the event. Various guests were scattered around the main foyer, and as they approached the venue, Rey started to see the signs and details for the event they were attending. A large blue banner was hung above the entrance that read “National Association of Collegiate Educators,” and Rey was puzzled as they crossed underneath it. She had thought they were going to some kind of business dinner.

“Ren,” she called up to him, but he did not look down at her. “What are we doing here?”

He did not answer her question, but gave her a command instead. 

“Tonight you will call me Ben,” he ordered.

“What?” She questioned with a shake of her head. She never got a response from him, since his name had suddenly been called by someone else.

“Ben!” A raspy female voice could be heard from across the room as Ren steered them towards a petite older woman. Her salt and pepper grey hair was pulled up into an elaborate braid around the crown of her head, and it looked like there were tears in her eyes as the two approached. “You came!”

Ren and Rey stopped in front of the older woman as she looked at the two young people before her. Her eyes lingered on their linked arms and Rey had a sinking feeling about the subterfuge she was about to engage in.

“Hello, Mother,” Ren greeted, dropping his arm from Rey’s in order to take his mother’s hands in his. He placed a warm kiss on their joined knuckles. “I would like to introduce you to someone,” he stood to the side and lifted his arm towards Rey as an avalanche of rocks hit the bottom of her stomach. “This is Rey Jackson. Rey, this is my mother, Leia Organa-Solo. The president of Corellia College.”

It felt like Rey had been doused with a bucket of ice water as she stood under the light scrutiny of Mr. Ren’s mother. She had only seen pictures of President Organa in the many catalogues she had received from the college, and had glimpsed her in passing at her Freshman orientation. The woman looked pristine in a deep plum suit with a cream colored blouse beneath it, her kind eyes behind a pair of smart tortoiseshell glasses. She looked at Rey like the girl had hung the moon as she addressed her son.

“Is this the one?” President Organa asked excitedly. “The girl my son borrowed my earrings for?” Her mortification multiplied tenfold when she remembered the inscription on the inside of the earrings.

LOS. . . Leia Organa-Solo. . .

“Yes,” Ren said, looking at Rey knowingly as he dropped a bombshell on her. “Rey is my girlfriend.”

It felt like Rey’s heart had stopped beating as the older woman continued to fawn over her. This was the subterfuge, and why he didn’t want them to fight. They had to play the part of the perfect couple in front of his mother.

“Oh, Ben, she is so beautiful! I am so happy for you.” She turned to Rey. “And thank you so much for coming tonight!”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” was the only thing Rey could think to say. She didn’t even have time to process what Ren had said as she was instantly swept up into a conversation with her fake-boyfriend’s mother. President Organa quickly grabbed Rey’s hands in both of hers, as if they were long lost friends. 

“The pleasure is all mine, my dear,” she said warmly, squeezing Rey’s hands with motherly affection. Mr. Ren was curiously quiet but she could feel his eyes on her the entire time. “Let’s sit down! I want to know all about you!”

“Mother is receiving a lifetime achievement award this evening, Rey,” Ren supplied as they walked to a table set for eight people. “For her dedication to the field of collegiate academics.”

“Congratulations, Ma’am.” If she was going to play a role tonight, she had better stop focusing on the way Mr. Ren was looking at her and start playing her part. President Organa refused to let Rey sit anywhere else but to her right. Ren sat on her other side, next to the open seats that had not yet been filled. 

“When my Ben asked me for not only one invitation, but two, I could have cried,” President Organa looked at her son warmly, but he seemed to duck away from the attention. “It’s been so long since he came to anything, I almost couldn’t believe it.” Her regard became more frosty as she glared at Mr. Ren. “You missed Rosh Hashanah,” she scolded.

Mr. Ren cleared his throat. “I was working.”

Rey looked up at her benefactor. “I didn’t know you were Jewish.”

“We are multi-faith,” President Organa answered for him as he stayed curiously silent. “My husband is Christian. We celebrate all holidays in the Solo household.”

“And where is Father this evening?” Rey watched as his fists clenched to his sides, remembering his rocky relationship with his family. President Organa rolled her eyes.

“You know he is in Florida, Ben. I told you last week. He will be back in Corellia soon, though. He is going to do a series of lectures at the college.”

“And Uncle?” He continued, and she could tell it was a stretch for him to even make small talk about his family. “Why didn’t he come?”

Leia scoffed. “Ah, well, he avoids these things like the plague. If the man even owned a tuxedo I would be surprised.” Leia reached over and placed a wrinkled hand over her son’s. “But you’re here tonight, Ben. That’s all that matters,” Ren looked away from her with a frown. 

Leia stood up from the table. “I see one of my old associates from Columbia, I’ll be right back.” She called out to her friend, “Gial!” before leaving them at the table alone.

Rey immediately turned to her benefactor with murder in her eyes. “Your mother?” She grit through clenched teeth. Furious did not even begin to encompass her feelings towards Ren’s brand of subterfuge. “This entire mission,” she spit out the word like venom, “is about your mother?”

Ren had the decency to look ashamed. “My boss wants to arrange a meeting with her. He wants to reinstate the First Order internship with the school. My mother dropped the company from the list of potential internships over five years ago.”

“You couldn’t do this at home?” She tried to control the volume of her voice, but it was very difficult when she was so incredibly angry. Her promise had officially been thrown out of the window as they began to argue.

“Every time I try to mention work, or the college, she shuts me down. Snoke thought this might be a better setting to try to talk about business.”

“And the earrings you borrowed from her?” He rubbed his neck and wouldn’t look her in the eye.

“I was hoping for an invitation to the event. After borrowing the earrings, I was able to convince her to provide two invitations.” 

“Because you made her believe I was your girlfriend.” She shook her head at him, completely aghast with his machinations. How could someone be so generous yet so selfish all at the same time? The man was a walking dichotomy of behavior. 

“If Snoke had not ordered you to come to this,” she asked as a sinking feeling entered her chest. “Would you have come?” He didn’t say anything, and she knew deep down that the answer was no. She was at a loss for words. “Sometimes, Mr. Ren, you surprise me with how monstrous you can truly be.”

“Sometimes, Miss Jackson,” he responded as President Organa joined them once more. “I surprise myself.”

Their argument was shelved for the time being as Leia dropped into the seat next to Rey. As much as she did not want to lie to the lovely woman next to her, Ren had given her no choice. She was in on this plan just as much as he was. 

“So, Rey, tell me all about yourself! Ben has told me so little about you!”

“Well,” she peeked over at her benefactor, and the man gave her a little nod. “I’m a student at your college, ma’am. I study engineering.”

“Enough with this ‘ma’am’ business!” She laughed. “Please call me Leia! Anyone who has worn the family earrings is officially one of us!”

“The family earrings?” Rey echoed, the blood draining from her face. 

“Yes, well, they’ve been passed down through two generations,” Leia shot her a knowing look. “And I cannot wait until they’re passed down to a third.” 

“Mother,” Ren scolded from behind Rey as she tried to look at anything but him. “I have only known Rey for less than a month.”

Leia fluttered her eyelashes at her handsome son. “And yet you still borrowed my earrings,” she trilled in a sing-song voice. “But tell me, Rey, what do you think about my school?”

“I love Corellia College,” Rey gushed, happy to be speaking the honest truth. “I’m in my third year, and I am already looking into graduate courses. It really feels like home to me.”

“You have no idea how happy that makes me,” Leia grasped Rey’s hand tight. “It was always my goal to provide a safe, positive learning environment where students can truly become the best versions of themselves.” She peeked over at Mr. Ren. “You know he went to CC as well, right.”

“Oh, yes, I heard that Ben went there,” it was the first time she had ever called him by his name and she liked the way his true name bounced on her lips. “And look how successful he is,” she said, smiling at the small blush on his cheeks.

Leia seemed to notice it as well. “Yes, he is quite the tycoon,” her smile melted into a frown. “If only he came to a holiday every once in a while.” 

Mr. Ren looked like he wanted to argue, but a man approached the dais that stood on the stage in front of their front table. As the guest of honor, Leia was sitting where everyone could see her as the attention was focused on them. The event was both a formal dinner and an awards gala. During every service, another educator was recognized for their achievements in the field. Leia’s award and speech was toward the end of the program, so there was a lot of time to kill before they could even think of leaving.

Presenters and recipients spoke throughout the service, so there wasn’t much time for conversation unless there was a short lapse in the program. Rey was happy to be distracted by both the food and the presentations. Her table manners and etiquette were perfect and Mr. Ren didn’t have to scold her once. It wasn’t until the third service that Mr. Ren’s knee began to shake under the table. She knew he was nervous about his inevitable conversation with his mother, but she was torn on whether or not to console him. She was still angry that he was using both her and his own mother in order to make his boss happy, which hardened her heart to his plight. 

After the main course was presented, they called President Organa to the stage to accept her lifetime achievement award. The entire banquet hall stood in ovation of her accomplishment, and Mr. Ren looked genuinely proud as he clapped for his mother. It made her soften towards him again for a little while, until they cleared away the plates and drinks. Some of the other guests had left the table to get drinks or use the restroom, leaving the three of them mostly alone. 

“Mother,” Ren called to Leia from across the table. She looked up at her son warmly as she took a sip of champagne. “I need to talk to you about something.”

Her eyes narrowed over the glass flute. “Do you now?”

“Yes, and I must be allowed to speak.”

She placed her glass down on the table and looked at Rey. “I have a bad feeling about this.”

“Snoke has been trying to contact you for weeks and you will not return his calls.” Ren said firmly, and Rey was literally holding on to the bottom of her chair in anticipation, volleying her gaze from mother to son as their eyes stayed locked together.

“There is nothing I have to say to Edmund,” Leia sniffed. “He said enough when he slandered the name of my school across multiple channels, including the BBC and the New York Times.”

Mr. Ren was not deterred. “He wants you to reinstate the First Order internship.”

Leia shook her head, completely incredulous. “Why? So he can add more wide-eyed kids to his twisted collection like he did to you? Are you out of your mind?”

“Snoke gave me my career,” Ren argued. 

“And he ruined your life, Ben,” Leia interrupted. “You haven’t been to a holiday, or an event, or even a damn barbecue in years because of that man. You want more people to end up like that?” Rey did nothing but watch as Leia’s eyes filled with tears. “Is this why you really came tonight, Ben? To corner me into a meeting with him?” Ren didn’t say anything and Leia looked over at Rey accusingly. It felt like she was going to be sick. “Is Rey even your girlfriend?”

“Yes,” Rey affirmed, interjecting herself into the argument while Ren’s eyes lifted in shock. She grabbed his hand in hers for a better effect. “Believe me, President Organa, Ben wants to be here. He’s just under so much pressure at his job. His boss really gave him no other choice.” She begged with her eyes, hoping that Leia would believe her word over her son’s. He was not doing a very good job at handling the extent of his deceit.

“I hate that Ben works all the time too,” Rey wasn’t even lying. She hated how overworked and exhausted he always was. “And I am definitely not a fan of his boss, either. But he really needs to make sure you schedule this meeting, President Organa.” She tried to smile like her benefactor, cunning and tricky. “Besides, just because you make an appointment in September, doesn’t mean you can’t cancel it in December.”

“Cancel?” Ren grumbled behind her. She turned and gave him a smirk, squeezing his hand in hers.

“Maybe reschedule,” she quipped. She turned to look at President Organa and the woman was transfixed on the tight grip of her hand in Mr. Ren’s. Slowly, she lifted her head and looked Rey square in the eye. 

“You said you were an engineering major?” The older woman asked, and Rey nodded. “Maybe you should try business or law instead.” Rey didn’t know how to interpret that as Leia turned to her son once more.

“Your assistant’s name is Mitaka right?” Leia asked. 

“Yes,” Ren said.

“Tell him to call my assistant Kaydel on Monday morning,” she pointed a ringed finger in her son’s face. “But just because I am meeting with Edmund does not mean I am willing to reinstate the program between Corellia and First Order. I want him to know that, Ben.”

“I will tell him, Mother. You have my word.” Rey had not yet let go of Mr. Ren’s hand and he made no motion to let go of hers either as he clenched it tighter and tighter. 

“Will you stay for dessert?” Leia asked, shifting back from president mode into motherly mode. Ren passed Rey a soft smile as she tried not to think about the last time they ate dessert together.

“We will stay for as long as you want us to,” was Mr. Ren’s diplomatic answer. It appeased his mother as their stressful conversation was finally dropped. 

The rest of the evening went by relatively smoothly after arranging the meeting between Corellia College and First Order. The awards had all been given out and dessert was served with coffee and digestifs. By the time the gala was over, it was after 10 pm. Leia pulled Rey to the side for a moment while Ren called to arrange their pickup with Rook.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Rey,” the woman said warmly as she gave her a very maternal pat on her cheek. Rey couldn’t help but smile at the lovely woman. 

“I’m sorry if Ben or I upset you at all tonight,” Rey apologized. “Thank you for hearing him out.”

“Ever since Ben started working for Snoke it felt like my son was lost. But tonight, with you,” there was a shimmer of tears in her eyes and Rey had to look away. “It felt like I had my son back for the first time in years.” She gave Rey’s shoulder a soft squeeze. “Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you need anything at all, Rey.”

“Thank you, President Organa, I will.”

“Please call me Leia,” she laughed. “The earrings demand it!”

“Alright Leia,” Rey supplied with a smile. “Have a good night.” Mr. Ren came over to place a kiss on his mother’s cheek and told her he would be contacting her soon. Then he lead her out of the banquet hall and back into the humid air of Atlantic City.

Rey was quiet as she got into the car, still feeling overwhelmed and conflicted from the night’s events. She and Ren had accomplished their mission, but at what cost? Lies and deceit and selfishness were the threads that had tied the evening together and it made everything seem wrong.

She could tell that Mr. Ren wanted to talk to her, but she made no move to start the conversation. It felt good to force him into awkwardness after the night he had put her through.

“Thank you,” was how he chose to begin. She didn’t answer him as silence filled up the backseat. “You don’t know how much I appreciate what you just did.”

“Which part?” She was still facing the windows as the bright lights of the casinos started to fade from view. “Lying to your mother? Pretending to be your girlfriend? Arranging the meeting for you?”

“All of it,” he coughed into his hand, shifting in his seat. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

She shook her head, tears gathering in her eyes. Every time she thought she knew what to say to him it got swept away by more anger. “I hope you’re happy, Mr. Ren.”

“Curiously, no,” he shook his head. “In fact I feel terrible.”

“Then we both feel similarly,” she sniped, hating the bitterness in her voice.

“Why did you do it?” He asked next, and this time she turned to him. She couldn’t really make out his expression in the darkness of the backseat, but she could feel his eyes on her. “Why did you pretend to be my girlfriend, even when you didn’t have to?” She couldn’t decipher the softness in his voice, or what it meant for their constantly shifting relationship.

Rey looked away, not knowing what to tell him. She lied because she was a hypocrite who had already claimed that she was dating him in her own personal life. She lied because it was a fantasy that was quickly becoming a precious dream of her heart. She lied because she was getting to the point where Rey would do anything for him, simply because he had asked her to do so. 

But Rey could say none of these things to Mr. Ren. 

“We had a mission. I did everything in my power to make sure the mission was a success.” Silence met her response, and she had a feeling that it was not what he’d wanted to hear. “I’m very tired, Ben,” she slipped, calling him by the wrong name, but he did not try to correct her. “I think I might try to take a nap.”

“I will wake you up when we get back to New York,” he promised.

She shifted in her seat, kicking off her shoes and curling up into the corner with her back facing Mr. Ren. Her exposed back and shoulders were chilly in the air conditioning, and she shivered lightly as she closed her eyes. The last thing she experienced before falling asleep was the sensation of fabric draping over her, as Mr. Ren covered up her shivering shoulders in his tuxedo jacket, enveloping her in both his smell and his warmth.

He did not wake her up when they reached New York.


	10. Communication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The timeline of this fic follows the actual 2018 calendar. They met on Friday, September 7, and today's date in the story is Sunday, September 23, in case you were wondering.

The first thing Rey remembered was the feeling of silk.

It took a long time to return to consciousness, but when she did, Rey instinctively knew that she was not in her dorm room. Everything about her surroundings seemed wrong. The silk sheets underneath her body were cool and smooth on her skin, so different from the scratchy bed sheets she bought at Target. The pillow was scented in a musk that was both familiar and welcoming as her head sunk deeper into the pillows. It was the same smell that had lulled her to sleep in the first place. When she finally recognized it, she sat up with a start, completely awake as she scrambled to find some source of light.

When she reached over and found a bedside lamp, she had to squint her eyes against the brightness as her eyes slowly adjusted. Looking down, Rey realized that she was still wearing her red dress, the wrinkled fabric a stark contrast against the black silk sheets of Mr. Ren’s bed. She was alone in the bedroom, the huge king size mattress taking up a massive amount of space in the sparsely decorated bedroom. Besides a black dresser and an incredibly large HDTV on the wall, there was very little furniture in the room.

And Rey knew it to be Mr. Ren’s home for certain. Besides the black tuxedo jacket that had been draped over her sleeping form, the scent of him enveloped her senses in every way as she slowly got up. A clock on the opposite side of the bed informed her that it was after 4am as she made her way to the attached master bathroom. With a groan, she looked at herself in the mirror and realized that she had fallen asleep with her hair still pinned. She still had all of her makeup on as well, most of it smudged on her face, along with the diamond earrings and gloves.

She went back into the bedroom after taking care of business, and reached for the bag that was resting next to her side of the bed. Rey sat on the edge of the bed and started taking off her dress and earrings, wondering how she had gotten upstairs. Mr. Ren must have carried her, that was obvious, but why? He had promised to wake her up when they got back to New York, not bring her to his apartment for an impromptu sleepover.

Mr. Ren was still nowhere to be seen as she went through his drawers and pulled out a soft, black v-neck t-shirt. It covered her entire body, dropping past her butt and landing halfway down her thighs. She couldn’t find any pants or shorts that fit her, and she didn’t want to wear her jeans, so she went without bottoms as she returned to the bathroom to remove the hairpins and wash her face of all remaining makeup. She looked at herself in the mirror when she was finished, wondering what to do next.

Wherever Mr. Ren was, he had left her to sleep alone. The sheets on the opposite side of her had not been slept in. Rey couldn’t even fathom why he had bothered to bring her here. She was about to go back into his room and leave the entire issue for the morning when she heard people conversing in the living room. Curiosity got the best of her and she decided to investigate.

Rey tiptoed out of Mr. Ren’s bedroom, finding herself in the long hallway that opened up into his large living space. Masculine voices could be heard as an eerie blue light bathed the open room in front of her. She made it to the end of the hallway without Mr. Ren noticing her as she watched him speak to an image she couldn’t see on his laptop. He was either using Skype or some kind of Face Time, but she couldn’t tell from the angle where she was standing. Mr. Ren was surrounded by file folders and stacks of paperwork as a dark, unfamiliar voice echoed from the tinny speakers of the laptop.

“Have the next phase of the consolidation take effect on Monday, Ren. I want to be kept aware of any and all staff changes between the Paris branch and the Berlin offices.”

“Yes, Mr. Snoke.” Mr. Ren still hadn’t noticed Rey yet as she eavesdropped on his daily briefing with his boss. This was the first time she had even heard the man’s voice, and yet it caused her whole body to cringe in discomfort. 

“I do hope you have some good news to report to me, Ren.” She watched his pale face glow blue from the reflection on his screen.

“I was able to arrange the meeting, sir,” Ren reported, pride evident in his tone. “Her assistant should be contacting us on Monday.”

“And the internship?” Ren shifted uncomfortably in his seat and Rey remembered Leia’s demands. 

“Mother said she would wait to discuss it with you at the meeting,” he hesitated to provide more information. “She didn’t make any promises.”

The voice on the other end of the computer was low and menacing as it reached across the open room. “That’s not good enough, Ren.”

Her benefactor shook his head, his jaw clenching along with his fists. “I did everything you asked, Mr. Snoke. She agreed to the meeting. What else would you have me do?”

“Whatever it takes!” The man behind the computer screen roared, so loud that Rey jumped back with a start, hitting her foot against the wall with a dull thud. Mr. Ren immediately looked up at her, catching her as his mouth dropped open in shock. “What was that?” The man asked, voice still demanding. 

“N-nothing,” Ren covered for her, ignoring her and looking only at his boss. 

“Is someone there, Ren?” The voice became borderline creepy as it dropped an octave. 

“No, I thought I heard a noise,” she watched him struggle to keep his eyes focused on the screen in front of him. “It was nothing.”

“Fine,” Snoke said, returning to the subject at hand. “You are going to do whatever it takes, Ren, to reinstate this program between the company and Corellia College. I don’t care what you must do. Be the prodigal son once more and convince Organa to reinstate the program or else your future at First Order will be in more jeopardy than it is now. Is that clear?”

Mr. Ren gulped once before nodding his head. “Yes, sir.”

“How did you do it, by the way?” Snoke questioned, the tone of his voice making Rey’s hair stand on end. “How did you get her to agree to the meeting?”

Mr. Ren’s tone was curiously flat. “I did as you taught me, sir,” he frowned. “I took advantage of every possible resource.” His words felt like stab wounds as she turned her back to him. She had to fight back the sudden sting of tears as the men wrapped up their conversation.

“Excellent,” the voice, which Rey could only categorize as sinister, trilled an uncomfortable laugh. “You will inform me of any changes as soon as they occur.”

“Of course, sir.” Nothing else was said as the blue light died away, leaving Mr. Ren sitting in only the slightest bit of ambient light from his electronics. She turned around to face him, but he was hunched over his knees, holding his face in his hands without making a sound. 

Rey stepped forward into the living room, not saying a word. Ren knew she was there, but he didn’t say anything either. It was only when she was a few steps away from him did she realize that he wasn’t wearing a shirt. Ren was dressed only in a pair of black sweatpants, and she could see the outline of every single muscle on his shoulders, arms, back, and torso. That was also when she remembered that she wasn’t wearing any pants, only his oversized t-shirt.

She would have been turned on if she weren’t so mad at him. In fact, her anger stemmed so deep, she didn’t even know where it began. Was it their argument over dessert? Or forcing her to lie to his mother? Or using her like a pawn just so he could continue to get belittled by his boss?

Rey walked up to the coffee table where his computer sat and slowly closed the screen, leaving them both in the darkness. He still didn’t sit up or pull his hands away from his face.

“We need to talk,” was her firm demand. Ren didn’t move an inch.

“It’s after 4 am, Miss Jackson,” he said, finally looking up at her in a fuzzy, uncertain way. They couldn’t really see each other, and the only light was leaking from his open bedroom door down the hall. “Whatever it is can wait for the morning.”

“It is the morning,” she argued, standing her ground. “And we need to talk, now.”

“I have work to do,” he grumbled, reaching over to lift his laptop screen again. 

“No,” she said, pressing her palm firmly on the cover so it would not open. He glared up at her but said nothing. “Have you slept at all tonight?” She asked, wondering what time they arrived home. His lack of an answer was all she needed to know.

“Come on,” she walked around the coffee table and reached for one of his bare arms, grasping it with a tug. For a moment he looked at her like she was crazy.

“What are you doing?” He grumbled, but also allowed her to pull him into a standing position. Rey still held onto his arm as she started walking down the hallway.

“I’m tired, and I’m angry, and I can’t go back to sleep until we finally talk about everything that’s happened this past week.” Ren started to dig his heels in and tried to stop her, but Rey didn’t care if she had to play tug-of-war with his arm, she was getting him to talk to her.

“What if I don’t want to talk?” He hissed at her in the dark. “What if I like this whole ‘pretend it never happened’ thing we have going on?”

“Then what’s the point of having me around, Ren?” She gripped his arm like a vice as she snarled up at him. “I thought we had a deal. Your whole argument was that you needed help communicating with people, yet you can barely open up to me! You left me in the dark tonight and it could have ruined everything.” 

Rey knew she had made her point when Mr. Ren had no retort for her. They were both breathing heavily as they stood in the hallway, eyes locked on one another in the dim light from the bedroom. He pulled his arm from her grasp, but walked past her into his room. She had to stop herself from staring at his muscled back as she followed after him.

Rey entered the room and Mr. Ren finally got a good look at her and her lack of proper clothing. He sat on the edge of the bed, still shirtless as she stood there in nothing but his shirt. “I see you made yourself at home,” he pulled up his lip in distaste at the slight mess in his room. Her dress was draped over his dresser since she couldn’t find a hanger, his drawers had all been left open, and the contents of her bag were spilling over onto his floor. 

“Well since someone didn’t bring me home, I had to improvise,” she walked to the far side of the bed, where she had woken up, and slipped under the sheets again. He watched her with wide eyes while he sat as still as a statue on the opposite side.

“Wh-what are you doing, Miss Jackson? I thought you said you wanted to talk.”

“I do,” she shrugged, nestling her head on the silky pillows while still looking over at him. “I am also very tired and I want to go back to sleep. You need sleep as well.”

“You and I will not be sharing a bed,” she couldn’t place the slight tremor in his voice and she shook her head. 

“Don’t fight with me,” she ordered, softening her voice to entice him to open up. She pat the space next to her gently. “Talk to me.”

Rey watched his stiff, untouchable body language deflate as he let out a giant sigh. His limbs loosened up and started to relax as he maneuvered his giant body onto the bed, lying with his back against the headboard in an upright position. She still had to look up at him to see his face, but slowly Mr. Ren started to get comfortable on his bed, crossing his legs at the ankles while she tried not to be too distracted by his lack of clothing. Looking at his bare arms and chest for too long caused her mouth to go dry, which would not be conducive to their conversation. 

“How much did you hear?” He asked first, looking down at her prone body as she tugged the sheets over her bare legs. 

“Enough to know that your creepy boss still isn’t happy,” she grumbled.

“No, he is not,” his deep voice sounded pained. “Arranging the meeting wasn’t good enough. He wants the internship reinstated.”

“Does,” she closed her eyes, afraid of his response. “Does Snoke know about me?”

“No,” his voice was as reassuring as she had ever heard it. “I have not told him about you.”

“Are you going to?” Silence. Her heart skipped a beat before his hesitant voice reached her again.

“It is not my intention to do so, Miss Jackson.” It wasn’t a yes, but it also wasn’t a no. His response left her stomach in a twist. She did not want that man to know about her, or her relationship with Mr. Ren. 

“What about your mother? Do we have to keep lying to her?” His eye twitched and his expression was pained as he glared down at her.

“Do you think I like lying to her? She is the only person in my life who claims to still love me. Believe me when I say it brings me no joy to concoct such falsities.”

“So why are you doing this? Is this internship truly worth it?” Rey needed to understand as she peeked up at him. His eyes were focused on her as he suddenly turned onto his side, propping his head onto his arm as he looked down at her. Rey’s entire body shuddered at their proximity and she could almost feel his body heat across the silk sheets. She had never shared a bed with a man before and she couldn’t help her body’s response as he inched closer to her. 

“To me it was.” Rey was hypnotized by the swirling hues of brown and gold in his eyes as he confessed to her. “When I first stepped into the building, and wore my first suit to the office, the internship had meant everything to me. It was my first chance to prove myself in the real world, and carve out a future and a career. It gave me an opportunity that changed my life. Now look at everything I have. Is it so wrong to want others to have that same chance at success?”

Ren was being so honest and earnest it was hard to disagree with him as her anger slowly started melting away into sympathy. He had experienced a true boost to his career through the internship, so in his eyes, the program was a good thing. But from Rey’s perspective, with the good came the bad, and over the years Ren had devolved into a socially awkward workaholic with anger issues. It wasn’t the kind of future she envisioned for her fellow co-eds, or for herself. 

“I think you need to make a very tough decision, Mr. Ren,” her fingers traced the small space between their bodies where an expanse of black silk tickled her fingertips. “I’ll stand by whatever decision you make, and I will pretend to be whoever you want me to be. But is this internship truly worth the deceit?”

He shook his head firmly, his mouth a hard line of conflict. “It's a good thing we have a few months until the meeting,” he said dryly, then let out a huge exhale. “I have no idea what to do.”

“Well first of all, you keep me informed.” Angrily, she pointed her finger into his bare skin, trying to ignore the feeling of his muscles. “No more bombshells, please.” She punctuated every word with a poke to his chest. She couldn’t help but enjoy the overwhelming intimacy of sharing this space with him. It was addicting.

He looked away from her and turned onto his back. “I didn’t know how you would respond.”

Rey turned onto her back as well, her benefactor only six inches away from her as they both stared up at the ceiling. “I responded like a professional. I thought I told you to trust me.” She ended her statement with a yawn.

“So you did,” Ren yawned as well, and Rey reached over to shut off the only light in the room. They were blanketed in darkness as sleep started to creep up on her again. “I am trying.”

“I know you are, Mr. Ren. But we need to communicate more, especially if you need us to keep pretending to be something we’re not.” He didn’t say anything else, just turned to his side so his back was facing her.

“I will leave you to your sleep then,” he shifted his body to get up as panic shot through her. Laying next to him felt wonderful, but there was something else that she wanted as she reached over and grabbed him on the arm once more.

“No.” Was her firm and solid command.

“No?” He questioned, peeking over his shoulder at her in the dark. 

“No,” she echoed, and everything about their conversation felt very familiar as deja vu washed over her. “I want you to stay.”

She couldn’t see his face, but his tone was nothing short of scandalized. “Miss Jackson. . .”

“Why didn’t you drop me off at my dorm?” She challenged him, feeling him tense under her fingertips. “You promised to wake me up. So why am I here?’

“I didn’t want to wake you,” was his low reply. “This just seemed easier.” His justification sounded weak to Rey. She had a feeling that he’d wanted her to stay, he just didn’t know how to admit it. 

“I’ve done everything you’ve asked me to over the past few weeks, and I haven’t asked you for a single thing in return. Tonight I want something.”

“What is it that you want, Rey?” His voice rumbled around her, her name a caress in the dark. Rey could have asked for anything in that moment, and she knew, instinctively, that Ren would have obliged her. 

But her request was much more chaste than the secret desire coursing through her blood.

“I want to know what it feels like,” her voice was very small as the fear of rejection crept into it. “To not sleep alone.” The huge bed felt small with Mr. Ren in it and Rey wanted to know what it felt like to share a bed with someone. She tugged his arm again. “Stay with me. Sleep in your own bed for once.”

He didn’t say anything, and the muscles she felt under her fingertips were firm and tense as he kept dangerously quiet. With a small huff, he shifted his body weight back on to the mattress, stretching himself out under the sheets as Rey removed her hand from his arm. His back was still facing her and he made no move to turn around.

But he stayed. 

With a small sigh, Rey turned around so that her back was facing his as well. The fact that he had agreed to this was a gift enough, she wasn’t going to demand anything else. 

“You will sleep now,” was his firm command from across the bed.

“Good night, Mr. Ren,” and with a shaky smile she pulled the silk sheets over her shoulders and fell back to sleep once more. 

When she opened her eyes again, the room was bathed in bright morning sunlight that practically blinded her as she groaned into the silk pillowcase. She turned over with a grumble and felt the warm indentation where Mr. Ren had slept, now completely vacant. She crawled out of bed and grabbed her bag, bringing it into the bathroom to change.

The clock said 9am when Rey exited the bathroom wearing the same outfit she had worn to Ventress’ boutique the day before. The red dress, shoes, gloves and clutch were all in Mr. Ren’s closet, and the dress definitely needed cleaning and ironing after being slept in it for half the night. 

The sound of cooking could be heard from the kitchen as Rey entered, carrying her bag and not knowing what to expect. Ren had promised to try to be a better communicator, but she didn’t expect magic to happen overnight. She spotted him working in the kitchen as he whisked together something in a bowl. It was a bit disappointing to see that he had put on a navy blue t-shirt.

She coughed lightly to grab his attention and he looked up at her with a hesitant smile. Soft classical music echoed throughout the living space and she noticed that the table was set for two.

“Good morning, Miss Jackson,” he greeted as he dumped the contents of the bowl into a hot pan.

“Good morning, Mr. Ren,” she dropped her bag by the living room couch then joined him in the kitchen. “What are you making?”

“Goat cheese and spinach omelettes,” he said, focusing on the food in front of him. “There is coffee or tea if you’d like.”

“Tea would be wonderful,” she watched as he maneuvered around his kitchen, the picture of domesticity. It made her heart flutter as she watched him prepare her breakfast. “I didn’t know you could cook.”

Ren shot her an incredulous look from over his shoulder. “Miss Jackson, I have been a bachelor for almost ten years. If I didn’t cook I would have starved by now.”

Rey shrugged her shoulders as he passed her a hot mug. “I don’t know, you always seemed like the kind of guy who ordered things out, or had a fancy cook to do it for you.”

“While a personal chef is well within my means, I would never allow strangers in my home for any reason. I take care of everything myself.” Rey couldn’t help but be impressed by the expert way he flipped her omelette.

“So no guests? No delivery boys?” He shook his head.

“All packages and deliveries are to be reported to the concierge who will then inform me via phone call. I have had very few guests over, but I always meet them downstairs.”

Rey remembered the doorman from the other day, and his surprise that Rey had been given the elevator code. “Well,” she drawled, “I’m a guest. You gave me the elevator code.”

“I believe we have already established that you are the exception to almost every single rule I have ever made up,” he grumbled, preparing her food while she stood transfixed. “Speaking of guests, we must talk about Tuesday.”

Rey nodded, remembering the fact that they were hosting this week’s dinner with Phasma and Hux. “Yes, what do you want to do?”

His eyebrow lifted at her playfully as he slid the omelette onto her plate. “Do you know how to cook?” He asked as he cracked more eggs for his breakfast.

Rey barked out an incredulous laugh. “No way,” she frowned. “I can barely boil water.”

“Maybe that will be our next lesson,” he mused as he continued to cook. “But until then, I will find a restaurant that can cater for the evening.” 

She took her plate and went to sit down at the table, blowing on her tea and waiting for him to join her. Rey couldn’t remember the last time someone had cooked for her, and the fact that it was Mr. Ren made it infinitely more special. 

“Do you think you can be here a little early on Tuesday?” He asked from the kitchen. “Maybe 6:30?”

“Sure, that should work fine,” he finally joined her with his own omelette and coffee, a shy smile on his face.

“Bon appetit,” he took a sip of coffee and she could feel him watching her as she took a bite of his food. Her eyes raised in shock when she realized just how delicious it was. 

“This is fantastic,” she mumbled in-between bites. “I wish I could eat this every morning.”

“I am glad you enjoy it,” Mr. Ren sounded more than a little pleased. He dabbed at his mouth with a napkin before folding it to his side. “I was thinking about what you said last night before bed.”

Rey had to stop the rush of blood to her cheeks as her body hummed in response to his words. They hadn’t done anything but sleep but it still left her skin sizzling when she thought about it. “Oh really?”

“Yes, what you said about us communicating more,” Rey nodded, taking another sip of tea.

“And?”

“You were right,” he agreed. 

“I am glad you think so Mr. Ren.”

“You will call me every night from now on,” he commanded between bites of his omelette as her eyebrows lifted in shock. “Before you go to sleep, after dinner, it matters not. But we will speak at least once a day in order to foster a deeper understanding of one another. That will then lead us to trust one another more.”

Rey was so stunned she had to remember to swallow her food before speaking. “What if I forget, or I’m working?”

“A text should suffice every once in a while, but I would like to hear from you every day, if possible.”

A warm glow shimmered through her as her lips pulled up in a smile. “I would like that, too.”

“What are your plans for the rest of the day?” He asked as he flipped through the Sunday New York Times, heading straight for the business section. 

“Homework,” she groaned. “Lots and lots of homework.” Between work on Friday and the event last night she hadn’t completed a single assignment. Her first sketches for her design portfolio were also due soon and she was woefully behind.

“I am sorry to hear it. Rook should be here in about a half hour so you can get started on your workload.” She frowned, not looking forward to the day ahead.

“What about you?” She asked as he peeked up at her over his coffee. “How are you spending your Sunday?”

He pointed over to the stacks of paperwork that still littered the living room. “Somebody interrupted me last night and now I’m hours behind,” he pulled up his lips into a smirk. “I have my own version of homework to take care of.”

Part of her wished she had brought her laptop, so they both could get their work done together. Spending the night with him left her feeling curiously domestic as she finished off the delicious meal.

“One of Ventress’ assistants will be here shortly to pick up the tuxedo, dress, and accessories,” Ren explained as he cleared off the table. He coughed once before continuing, trying to sound nonchalant. “You know, it’s actually better that you slept over last night.”

Rey welcomed the tiny thrill that shot up through her spine. “Really?”

“Yes, well, it made collecting the wardrobe that much easier,” he joined her at the table once more, but avoided eye contact with her as a light blush dusted his cheeks. “And you seemed to have enjoyed the company.”

She ducked away from him, a blush now on her cheeks as well. “Yes, I did.”

“As did I,” he agreed stiffly. They shared a quiet moment before he made his second shocking demand of the morning. “Then it’s settled. You will stay over when we are dressed for events.”

All she could do was nod over her tea. “Alright.” Rose was going to be thrilled when she started sleeping over at her fake-boyfriend's place all the time.

“Just to make it easier for Ventress,” he remarked flippantly.

“Of course.”

“Good,” he muttered to himself. “Good.”

Rey had to smile at his shy avoidance of her. Deep down she knew that he had liked the company last night as well, and she wasn’t going to say no to spending another night in that large, luxurious bed. Nothing had happened the night before besides sleeping but it was still the most intimate she had ever been with a man. It meant something to her, and she wanted it to happen again. Being close to him was an addictive feeling, even when they were arguing. She wanted to believe he felt the same.

“Do we have any other events coming up this week?” Rey asked, “It’s the last full week of September.” Rey couldn’t believe that the first month of school was already almost over. After meeting Mr. Ren, her life had become a blur of work and events and shopping. It was hard to grasp the fact that October was almost here.

“There is dinner on Tuesday with Hux, then we should plan another lesson before the end of the week,” he added thoughtfully. “I think there is one other event before Snoke wants me back in London at the beginning of October.”

Rey hated the creeping sense of foreboding that winced through her every time he mentioned his boss. There was just something about the man that set her on edge, and she had only ever heard his voice. She couldn’t imagine working under him every single day.

“How long will you be gone?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s hard to say. Sometimes it’s four days, sometimes it’s two weeks.”

Rey struggled to hide her disappointment. “Two weeks?” She echoed sadly. His gaze was surprised when he peeked up at her from his paper.

“Well,” he coughed. “Um, yes.” He fidgeted in his seat. “But we agreed that we would speak every day, did we not?”

She looked more hopeful. “We did.”

“So you will call me every night,” he declared.

“Yes, I promise,” their eyes met over their morning brews and Rey couldn’t help but recognize a certain spark in Mr. Ren’s eyes. It brightened his whole face as his lips turned up in a soft smile, completely void of the usual sarcasm and snark. It made him look years younger and Rey couldn’t look away from him.

Their quiet ambiance was broken by Ren’s cell phone, informing them that her ride home had arrived downstairs. Rey took one last sip of tea before grabbing her bag and making sure everything was inside. Her cell phone had never been charged the night before and was now dead, but her earrings were safely put away along with her keys and wallet.

“I will see you on Tuesday,” she said to Ren as he waited for her at the door. There was a small foyer that led to the elevator, and Ren seemed to fidget as he pressed the down button for her. “I’ll call you later tonight.”

He seemed pleased, despite the fact that his hands were clenching into fists at his sides. “Once again, Miss Jackson, I cannot thank you enough for everything you have done for me.” The elevator dinged as the doors opened behind her. She smiled at him once more.

“Like I said, Mr. Ren, I’ll stand by whatever you decide.” In her head, she hoped that he would make the right decision, but the choice was up to him. 

He didn’t say anything else and the doors began to close. She was stunned to see him suddenly push his way into the elevator, popping through the doors before they closed on him. There wasn’t even time to gasp before he pulled her into the tightest hug she had ever felt, practically lifting her off of the ground as he held her firmly against him. 

Rey’s arms wrapped around his wide shoulders, holding onto him at an odd angle as she squeezed her eyes tightly and rested her head on his shoulder. She had been hugged before, but never like this. It had never felt like someone was holding onto her as if she were their tether to reality. It had never felt so right to be in another person’s arms.

“Thank you,” he finally whispered after what felt like forever in his embrace, and she didn’t want to let go as the elevator hit the ground level. 

“For what?” The doors opened. 

“For defending me,” he said, hesitantly putting her down and stepping away. “For staying by my side.” 

He reached for her hand and tucked it into the groove of his arm like he had the night before, walking her out of the elevator and onto the ground floor of his building. Rey’s heart skipped many a beat as he escorted her across the lobby, still barefoot and in his pajamas but not caring a whit.

Rey looked around as every doorman and concierge in the lobby stared at her and Mr. Ren. They rushed to open the doors for them, but Mr. Ren did not follow her outside due to a lack of footwear. 

Instead he removed her hand from the crook of his arm and held it in his. The browns of his eyes were swirling with amber and gold as he leaned over and placed a warm kiss on her knuckles. Her nerves were set ablaze by the feeling of his supple lips on her skin.

Her breath caught as she gripped onto her bag, trying to stop her knees from shaking as he finally dropped his hand from hers.

“I’ll talk to you later,” the words wrapped around her like a promise as she smiled and walked away, her heart feeling more full than it had ever felt as she climbed into the backseat of the car and drove off. 

She sighed as she rested her head against the seat, closing her eyes. He might make her angry, and frustrated about half of everything he said and did, but Rey couldn’t deny that Mr. Ren was the most handsome, interesting man of her entire acquaintance. She couldn’t ignore the way her heart stuttered every single time he was near. And Rey definitely could not overlook how sweet and sensitive he was when they were alone. No matter how cold, or aloof he was in public, deep down she knew that there was a side to him that only Rey was privy to.

And she was starting to like that side of him way too much as her knuckles tingled the entire way home.


	11. Improvements

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this chapter reminded me of my old friends from college, who made Taco Tuesday into a weekly institution. I miss college life like WHOA. Being an adult sucks. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this little update before the next MONSTER chapter!
> 
> Visit me on tumblr, my name is applepiepancakes!!

The Student Union building was packed with co-eds during the short lunch hour before afternoon classes began. It felt like every student on campus was trying to fit into the dining hall as long lines at various booths wrapped around the cramped space. Rey, Finn, Rose and Poe were sharing a table by the windows overlooking the small pond that sat in the middle of campus. Rey was munching on her turkey and avocado wrap while Poe was already trying to plan dinner.

“So, Taco Tuesday tonight,” he rubbed his hands together excitedly. “What time is better? Six or Seven?”

“Seven is better for me,” Finn said in-between bites of his pasta. “I have study group this afternoon for my ASL class.” Finn was a communications major and wanted to work with the hearing impaired after college. 

“I can do seven,” Rose agreed as well.

“What about you, Rey?” Poe asked. Three pairs of eyes turned to her as she slowly gulped down her food. 

“I can’t come tonight,” she said, trying to focus on her wrap. She shoved an extra large bite in her mouth so she didn’t have to speak for a while. Mr. Ren would have been horrified at her decorum.

“Why not?” Poe questioned. “You haven’t been to Taco Tuesday in weeks!”

“That’s because she has dinner with her boyfriend on Tuesdays now,” Rose teased while fluttering her eyelashes at Rey.

“He is not my boyfriend,” she argued weakly. “Besides, it’s not just us. Other people will be there too.”

“Any news?” Rose asked between bites of her salad. “Are you guys official yet?”

Well, Rey was officially lying to everyone that mattered in both her life and Mr. Ren’s. And she was officially dealing with her mounting feelings of attraction towards her benefactor. Did that count?

“No, Rose,” Rey sighed and took a sip of her ginger ale. “We’re just friends.” 

She bit into her wrap dejectedly, hating the lies that had been building up over the past three weeks. When she was just covering her tracks for dinners and nights out, Rey didn’t feel any guilt in dropping a little white lie now and then, but now it felt like things were spiraling way too quickly for comfort. Rey was lying to her friends, she and Ren were lying to his mother, and she didn’t see an end to it in sight. Mr. Ren promised to be her benefactor until the end of her bachelor's degree. Did that mean she had to spend the next two years lying to everyone she knew? 

There was also another issue plaguing Rey, one that had nothing to do with lies and everything to do with Mr. Ren. She had been calling him every night since Sunday, just like he’d demanded, talking about their days and sharing bits of information with one another. The information was sometimes frivolous, sometimes eye-opening, and it helped them understand each other’s backgrounds a bit better. For example, she now knew that he had started investing in the stock market at twenty four, which is how he’d made the majority of his money before rising through the ranks of First Order. Rey divulged that in her youth she had once found a wallet filled with cash, and had returned it to the house without taking a pound for herself, even though she hadn’t eaten in over a day. He hadn’t said much after her story, but thanked her for sharing in that soft, sensitive tone he used only with her.

It felt good to share those little pieces of herself with him, things she never thought she would tell anyone. Speaking to him felt cathartic and empowering, and she could tell that he liked to share bits of himself with her as well.

But there was something about him that she desperately wanted to know, but didn’t know how to ask. 

Was Mr. Ren as attracted to her as she was to him?

It had been on her mind constantly since their impromptu sleepover. She and Mr. Ren had shared a bed, half-naked, and the man didn’t even make a move to touch her. Sometimes he looked at her as if she were the most gorgeous thing he had ever seen, and sometimes he treated her like she wasn’t even there. They had slept in the same space and he’d kept his back to her the entire time. Either he had the self-control of a monk or he simply didn’t find her attractive.

There was another problem that Rey had also considered recently. Mr. Ren was going to be thirty one in November, a fact that he had shared with her during one of their phone calls. She was going to be twenty one in April. That was a ten year age difference, and since Rey had never dated before, she knew that some people were averse to such an age gap in relationships. While Rey didn’t mind that Ren was older than her, she wondered if he might. Luckily, she was sitting with someone who had experience with the topic at hand.

“Poe, can I ask you a question?” The curly haired senior flashed Rey one of his trademark grins. 

“Sure, kiddo, what’s up?” Poe had served a tour in the Air Force right after high school, and was now in college under the dime of the U.S. Government. He was several years older than her, Rose, and Finn, even though he acted more immature than they did most of the time. 

“How do you know if a girl is too young for you?” Poe was in a fraternity, and he was a popular catch for many of the co-eds on campus.

“Well, that’s easy. I just use the universal rule.” 

“The universal rule?” He clarified at Rey’s look of confusion.

“Every guy knows this, Rey. Believe me. You take your age, divide it by half, then add seven to the number. Anything less than that is too young.” Now Rose and Finn were paying attention to them and needed further clarification. “Okay, well. I’m twenty six. Half my age is thirteen, then when you add seven the total is twenty. So it would be creepy if I dated anyone younger than twenty.” He sent Rey a flirtatious grin. “Wanna go out on Saturday?”

Rey playfully pushed him, shaking her head at him while her friends laughed. Rey chewed her lip as she did the math in her head. Half of thirty one was fifteen and a half. Then add seven and the total was. . . 

Twenty two and a half. 

Rey wasn’t even twenty one yet. As much as she didn’t want to deny it, the facts did not lie. She was too young for him.

All of Rey’s hopes suddenly sank, leaving her feeling dejected and miserable. Mr. Ren was the pinnacle of manners and etiquette. He would never date someone that he thought was too young for him. She knew him well enough to know that he would consider it inappropriate and uncouth. 

Rey dropped the rest of her wrap onto it’s plastic container, no longer feeling hungry. To Mr. Ren, she would always be too young, too immature for a man of his station in life. His goal from the beginning had always been to teach her, and provide her financial support, not to date her and fulfill all of her insipid virginal fantasies. She had to chase the idea out of her mind. Mr. Ren was too old for her and he didn’t find her attractive. The hug and kiss he had given her on Sunday were nothing more than expressions of his overwhelming gratitude. It was the same as his gift of the diamond earrings. 

Rey didn’t even know why she was wasting her time thinking about such frivolous nonsense in the first place. Their arrangement had never been about sex, or affection, or attraction of any kind. It was futile to think that Mr. Ren wanted anything else with her when he had made it abundantly clear from the beginning that he was not interested. Their relationship was evolving, but the core of it remained. He was her benefactor, and there was a very specific role she had to play in his life. She could not allow her feelings and emotions to get in the way of anything.

However, when she was lying to everyone in her life about Mr. Ren being her boyfriend, was it truly her fault if she started thinking of him in a similar way? Call it a consequence of her circumstances, but she needed to reign it in. It would only cause more problems in the long run.

Rey tried to conceal her disappointment and slight heartache while finishing up lunch with her friends. She went to her afternoon class and received an A on her initial design sketches from Director Krennic. He left her a short note on the back of her paperwork that she read with enthusiasm.

_I was incredibly impressed with the initial designs of your original piece. Looking forward to learning more about your idea._

The grin felt tattooed onto Rey’s face as she practically skipped out of her engineering class that afternoon, feeling elated that her professor had liked her design. Rey was a fixer, she liked fixing broken things, and she couldn’t wait to start fixing the problem that her idea would solve. With a burst of arrogance, she thought for a moment that her design might change the world. She quickly chased the thought away, laughing it off as an impossibility. Her idea was still nothing more than some sketches on a page, and until she started building an actual working prototype, that was all it would ever be. 

Mr. Rook was picking her up at six, so Rey had some time to get some light reading done before his arrival. She dressed in a simple navy tunic with black leggings and ankle boots. Rose wasn’t home yet, so she slipped her earrings on without having to worry about anyone seeing them. It still gave her a thrill to wear them, even though she had to keep reminding herself that they were a token of gratitude and not affection. At 6pm, Rook picked her up and made his way into the center of Corellia. Once again, she ignored the stares of the concierge and footmen, who now all remembered her on sight, as she made her way to the elevator.

The foyer door was open, revealing Mr. Ren’s living area as she crossed the threshold of his apartment. Just like Sunday morning, classical music was playing through the sub-woofer speakers of his living room and the table was already set, this time for four people. Mr. Ren was nowhere to be seen, but the food was already placed in serving trays on the kitchen island that separated the dining room. 

She placed her bag and light jacket on the couch and called out for her benefactor. “Mr. Ren?”

The voice echoed down the long hallway. “In here, Miss Jackson.”

Rey walked towards his room and the sight that greeted her had her standing transfixed in the doorway as her eyes popped open in appreciation. Mouth dry, she stared at his naked back as a pair of delicious dark denim jeans slid over his supple backside while he changed into casual clothing. He buttoned the fly before turning around, and the lip of his black boxer briefs could be seen peeking over his jeans as he reached for a familiar black t-shirt.

“Good evening,” he crooned to her as he slipped the shirt over his head. He took a moment to adjust his shirt then ran a hand through his loose hair.

Rey had to remember to breathe before she could remember to speak. “Hi,” was all her brain could supply her.

“I got home a bit later than expected and took care of the food first,” he explained, gathering up the clothes that were scattered on his bed and floor. “I am sorry that I wasn’t prepared for your arrival.”

Rey still hadn’t moved an inch while he put his suit away. “It’s not a problem.” Seeing Mr. Ren in that state of undress would never be a problem, for anyone, in any universe or reality. 

“You’re wearing them again,” he remarked, nodding towards the earrings after tidying his room. His eyes were soft as he walked toward her at the threshold. She blushed and turned away, heading down the hallway with Ren following closely behind. 

“I told you I liked wearing them.” She shrugged. “I don’t want them to just sit in a box forever. They should be seen.”

“I feel the same, Miss Jackson.”

“How have things been at work?” She asked, wanting to change the subject as they entered the dining room. He rarely discussed anything specific about his job, but he was starting to open up about his daily activities and routines. 

“I didn’t yell at anyone today,” he mused thoughtfully. “My secretary came in and asked if I was ill.”

“Really?” She laughed as she sat on his couch and waited for their guests to arrive. He stood by the kitchen, opening up a bottle of wine for him, Hux, and Phasma to share.

“Yes, well, I am sure you know by now that I have a certain reputation at work,” he sniffed imperiously. “When I do not act as people expect, they wonder if I am not myself.”

“And what did you say to Mitaka?”

“I told him that I was perfectly happy and in the highest of spirits,” he shot Rey a knowing look. “Which caused him to walk out of the office backwards, as if I were a ticking time bomb.”

Rey had to laugh, and was pleased when Mr. Ren returned a small smile as well. “You probably scared him even more,” she sighed. “What put you in such a great mood?”

Ren looked away from her, pouring himself a glass of wine. “I believe your efforts at communication have been paying off, Miss Jackson. Since our nightly phone calls began I find myself becoming less quick to anger, and more conscious of my behavior. It has been both insightful and invigorating.”

“That’s wonderful,” she grinned, truly happy to have helped him in some way. 

“Yes, well, it helps to even me out after the stressors of my day. Talking to Snoke all the time drains me terribly. Sometimes I feel like my bad mood comes directly from him.”

Rey shivered, but not from the cold. The memory of that creepy voice was still haunting her, even days after hearing it. “I don’t doubt it, Mr. Ren.”

Mr. Ren suddenly received a call over his intercom, where the concierge informed him that his guests had arrived. Mr. Ren pressed a button on the far wall near the foyer. “I’ll be right down.”

He turned to glance at Rey. “Make yourself at home. I’ll be right back.”

Ren left Rey in his apartment alone, breaking his own rule about having people in his house when he wasn’t there. She went into the kitchen and immediately walked up to his refrigerator, wondering what was inside as curiosity got the better of her. There were the basic items, like eggs, milk, butter, and various condiments, along with protein shakes and packages of defrosted meat.

What made her grin was the fact that the entire bottom shelf was filled with green cans of ginger ale. In the three weeks she had known him he had never even taken a sip of the drink, so she knew deep down that he had bought them for her. She grabbed one for herself and cracked it open while waiting in the foyer for their guests to arrive, like a good little hostess. It only took a minute before the elevator doors opened and their night began.

“Rey!” Phasma gushed as she pushed past the men into the apartment. “It’s so good to see you again, dear!” The tall blonde crushed Rey to her in a giant hug while Rey tried not to drop her can of soda. 

“Hello Phasma,” she returned warmly as she was let go. “Hello Hux.”

The redhead ruffled Rey’s hair as if she were a child. “Hello there, Rey.” Rey swatted his hands away and tried to smooth her hair back into it’s half-up, half-down style once more.

“Oi!” She grimaced, her mouth puckering in distaste. It was bad enough she felt young around these people, they didn’t have to treat her like a kid. Ren shot her a knowing look and she remembered that she had to play the part of hostess this evening. All hostesses had to deal with rude guests every once in a while. She cleared her throat before calming her features. “Can I take your jackets?”

“Yes, please,” Hux passed her a sport coat while Phasma handed over a silk shawl. Rey draped them over her jacket by the couch and joined them all in the dining room as Ren poured their wine.

“You were incredible today, Ren,” Hux said warmly as he and Phasma took their seats at the dining room table. Rey stood with Ren at the kitchen island, where they were plating the food from the serving trays. “The way you handled Kanata during the negotiations? I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Yes, truly, Ren,” Phasma agreed, smoothing out her silver blouse. “No one even raised their voices. I thought I was at a tea service instead of a business deal. You’ve impressed us all.” 

The glow of pride was unmistakable in her benefactor as he glanced towards Rey. “I have been trying to refine my bedside manner,” he explained. “It seems to have been working.” 

Rey had to duck her head away from him to hide her blush. As much as she’d hoped her influence would benefit him, actually knowing that he’d improved made Rey feel validated and optimistic. 

“Yes, well, here’s hoping you find success next week during the next round of negotiations in London,” Phasma wished as Rey passed her a plate of food. “Snoke wants us to go as well.”

“Yes,” Hux drawled over his wine. “As much as I love having an excuse to return home and visit my mother, I would rather it not be a work event.” Hux grumbled. “And it’s probably already freezing there.”

Mr. Ren passed Rey the final plate and they were finally able to sit down since their guests had all been served. Rey took in the delicious meal of short ribs, mashed potatoes, and asparagus and started digging in with enthusiasm. So much enthusiasm that Ren had to shoot her the haughtiest look in his repertoire in order for her to slow down. 

“So Rey,” Phasma asked over small bites of food. “How is your semester going? I do miss college life terribly,” she added wistfully.

“Everything is great,” she supplied enthusiastically. “In fact, I just got an A on the most recent project for my engineering portfolio.”

“Ah, do tell,” Ren encouraged with a nod. She hadn’t had the opportunity to inform him of Krennic’s comments and was excited to share.

“Well, it was the basic sketches for the design, and Director Krennic told me that he was excited to learn more about my idea. It’s the best feedback I’ve ever received from him.”

“Yes, Krennic is a hard man to please, but incredibly talented in his field,” Hux added thoughtfully. 

“You know him?” Rey knew that Hux had gone to Corellia College as well, but he had studied business, not engineering.

“Yes, well, besides teaching, Orson works with the engineering division of First Order Incorporated as a freelancer. I have to meet with him from time to time when projects coincide with multiple departments.” Ren and Phasma both nodded, obviously knowing the man as well. 

“I didn’t know he worked for your company,” she remarked, the idea not sitting well with her. 

“Yes, well, he tends to recommend his brightest students for job opportunities at First Order when they graduate. You might have caught his eye with your ideas,” Phasma added with enthusiasm as Ren’s eyes brightened. 

While the rest of the table seemed eager for Rey to get a job with First Order, she had to shake away the overwhelming sense of wrongness she felt about the entire concept. Rey had a very fixed idea of what her future looked like, and it had nothing to do with First Order Incorporated and everything to do with outer space and NASA.

“Well, the next step is outlining the functions of the design and then creating the first prototype,” she rubbed her hands together in excitement. “I can’t wait to go to the junkyard and get started.”

Mr. Ren immediately looked up from his meal and stared at her, his visage a reflection of horror. “The junkyard?” He sounded aghast. “Why in God’s name would you go there?”

“Where else would I go to get the spare parts I need?” Rey reasoned, feeling defensive. 

“Surely the engineering department has the resources you need for this kind of thing?”

Rey thought about it for a moment. “Well, they have their own scrap room, along with their 3-D printers, but sometimes it’s better to just get your hands dirty and find what you need yourself,” she explained logically. “I can probably get everything I need at the junkyard for the external parts of the machine, and then use the 3-D printers to create the original pieces of my design.”

Mr. Ren was still looking at her as if she needed to be institutionalized. “So you’re telling me that whilst I am away in London, you are going to be spending your free time traipsing around in a junkyard, knee deep in garbage like some kind of scavenger?”

“Yes, that sounds about right.”

“It’s nice to know that you’ve been learning so little from my lessons,” he snarked. 

“Well I think it’s wonderful,” Phasma gushed. “A girl who’s not afraid to get a little bit dirty in order to create something new and exciting. I wish you the best of luck.” Phasma raised a glass.

“Here, here!” Hux did the same, and Ren reluctantly lifted his wine glass. 

“Yes, yes, all the best of luck while you’re getting hosed down in a decontamination shower.”

Rey couldn’t do anything but laugh at the pronounced frown on his face while Hux and Phasma joined in. The grimace remained but there was a spark of humor in his eyes that caused Rey to laugh even harder.

The rest of dinner went remarkably well. Mr. Ren was as relaxed and friendly as she had ever seen him, bringing out rare moments of humor in everyone throughout the meal. He conversed about work, but also asked Hux and Phasma about catching a West End play while they were together in London. Rey had never been so hopeful or so proud of his progress.

Eventually, the night had to come to an end. The four of them would not be meeting for dinner again until they all returned from London, and Rey was sad to see them go. Rey retrieved their jackets from the living room, and said goodbye with warm wishes for safe travel. Ren saw them to the elevator before joining her in the apartment once more.

For once, Rey decided to act the part of the teacher before Ren had a chance to do it. “I’m proud of you,” she started, ignoring the softness of his gaze as he reached for her jacket. 

“You are?” He asked as she turned around and allowed him to slip it on. She fixed her hair and faced him once more.

“Very much so,” she said shyly, reaching up to straighten and smooth the collar on the shirt she had worn to sleep on Sunday morning. She wondered if he realized he was wearing the same one as he gazed down at her through hooded lids. “I seem to be quite the positive influence on you,” she wasn’t trying to flirt with him, she really wasn’t, but his proximity to her and the look in his eyes were causing her to act more reckless than she should.

“You have no idea,” his voice wrapped around her like an embrace. 

“Do you want me to call you when I get home?” She looked up at him and saw his pupils slightly dilate. 

“Yes,” he breathed, reaching over to pull an errant strand of hair back into place behind her ear. “When will I see you again? We need to plan our next lesson. Cooking 101.”

“Tomorrow?” He shook his head.

“I can’t. Conference call with Los Angeles.”

Rey frowned. “Thursday and Friday are no good for me. I have class and work.” He looked frustrated as his jaw clenched tightly.

“I think we have an event on Saturday night,” he thought to himself. “A charity event for another organization I donate to.”

It gave Rey an idea. An idea that summoned every sensation to come to life inside of her. “Well, you said that I could sleep over when we get dressed for events.”

His eyes met hers and the swirling browns darkened to almost black. “Yes I did.”

“Then we can have our lesson on Sunday morning,” the implication was heavy, along with her breathing. “You can teach me how to make those delicious omelettes.”

“Yes,” was his only reply, and she couldn’t tell where his pupils ended and his irises began. “Excellent.”

Ren’s gaze lingered on her and she had to physically force herself to take a step back from him to put some distance between them. Now that the idea was out there, the anticipation of it was building at an alarming rate. 

“I’ll see you on Saturday,” she said, smiling warmly as he walked her to the elevator. Once again, he reached for her hand, placing a warm and welcome kiss on her knuckles as the doors opened behind her.

“I wish Saturday were tomorrow,” his voice was so soft, she almost didn’t hear it over the ding of the closing doors. 

Finally alone, Rey exhaled an unsteady breath, hating how her entire body trembled in response to his attention. As strong as she tried to be when he was around, she instantly transformed into a lovelorn little girl the second he was out of her periphery as every tender feeling for him shimmered to the surface.

Closing her eyes, she held her knuckles up to her mouth, pressing them against her lips in a pathetic imitation of a kiss.

It was probably as close as she would ever get to the real thing.


	12. Cooking with Heat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 7300 words in this beast of a chapter. Hold on to your butts!

For the rest of the week, Rey stared at the clock constantly, willing time to move a bit faster and propel her directly to the charity event on Saturday night. Her anticipation was reaching its boiling point and it was hard to focus on anything else besides Mr. Ren as the days passed by incredibly slow. He was the last thing she thought about at night and the first thing she thought about in the morning. Their phone calls were enough to suffice for the time being, reminding one another every night that Saturday was inching closer and closer with every passing day. 

When Friday night rolled around and he ended their conversation with, “I’ll see you tomorrow,” it took almost a half an hour for her blush to finally die down. Saturday afternoon was a complete waste since she couldn’t seem to focus on anything besides the vision of Mr. Ren in a tux, so very little homework got done. Her expectations for the night ahead were high, and to say that she was looking forward to it was an understatement in every sense of the word.

Rose and Finn were lounging on the bed when Mr. Ren sent her the information on when Rook would pick her up. She pulled out her oversized bag and started packing it with the things she would need for their planned sleepover, trying to hide the smile that had bubbled to the surface. Pajamas, toothbrush, a change of clothes for tomorrow, her charger. All things she had never brought over to a guy’s place before. Eventually, Rose and her keen sense of observation figured out what Rey was doing. 

“Are you packing an overnight bag?” Rose asked as she pulled away from Finn and sat up on the bed.

Rey looked down at her bag, making sure her earrings were securely tucked into a side pocket. “I’m going out tonight,” she shrugged. “I don’t know when I’ll be back.”

“Are you going out with the financial aid group?”

“Yes,” Rey covered smoothly. “One of the girls said I can crash with her if we stay out too late.” As much as it thrilled her to use the fake-boyfriend excuse, she had to limit how much she used it. If Rose thought for a moment that she would be spending the night with Mr. Ren, she would never let her hear the end of it.

“Will that Ben guy be there?” Finn asked, still annoyed that Rey hadn’t introduced them yet. He would have to wait a very long time for that to happen, maybe when they all started their Masters degrees.

“Maybe,” she hedged, twisting her loose hair up in a bun so the ladies could do whatever they wanted with it. She had showered earlier today, but received no instructions from Ren besides the time Rook would be arriving. 

“When are we going to meet him?” Finn pushed, “You’ve been seeing him for almost a month.”

“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “He’s a busy guy. He works as well, and doesn’t have much time for socialization.” Well, that was the truth. The man didn’t have time for anyone unless it was scheduled and verified with his secretary days in advance. 

“Maybe invite him to a Delta Tau party,” Finn suggested. “The guys and I will show him a great time!” Rey had to press her fist to her lips in order to fight back the laugh that threatened to escape her. The idea of Mr. Ren at a frat party was too hilarious to even consider. It would be tantamount to torture for him. 

“I highly doubt that’s his scene, but I’ll run it by him, see what he says,” she couldn’t even imagine the snarky retort he would give her at such a request. She checked the clock once more. “Okay, I’m out. Don’t wait up for me,” she hugged her friends and they said their goodbyes before Rey left the building for the night. She couldn’t remember the last time she had purposely stayed over someone’s house, never having been to an actual sleepover in her life. 

Excitement and anticipation were warring emotions for Rey’s attention as she slipped into her many fantasies of the night ahead, all of which had been brewing over the past few days. She had no idea what the night would entail, but the possibilities were endless as she also considered tomorrow morning. It caused a pronounced rouge tint to enter her cheeks as a familiar black car pulled up in the parking lot.

Just like last time, Mr. Ren exited the car, allowing her space to enter as he gazed at her with a soft regard. “Good evening, Miss Jackson.” His hair was down and loose around his face and he looked handsome in a burgundy sweater and black slacks. His eyebrow tilted up when he noticed her overnight bag.

“Hello, Mr. Ren,” she slipped past him into the car and watched as he held out a hand for her to take. She accepted it graciously as he helped her scoot into the backseat. They were still holding hands when he slid in next to her. 

“How are you?” He asked, his voice eager.

“It’s Saturday,” she whispered, as if that explained everything. Rey squeezed his hand softly.

“Yes, it is,” he returned the gesture, and nothing else needed to be said as their hands stayed locked together the entire ride into town. Every moment spent holding his hand was a sign from above that this night was meant to be truly special. He wasn’t pulling away from her, and he was being so gentle and sweet. Maybe he did feel the same as her, and tonight would be the moment he finally admitted it. It was so easy to get caught up in the romanticized image of their night ahead; the fancy clothes, the chauffeur, the jewelry, the glittering events. Rey didn’t want to be rational, she wanted to throw herself at the mercy of her fantasies in the hopes that they all came true.

They pulled up in front of the boutique, and Mr. Ren finally let go of her hand to exit the vehicle and help her out. His hand was placed on the junction of her lower back like always as he lead her into the store. They received a warm welcome from Ventress as she greeted them at the door. They walked towards the back where Rey placed her bag in the corner chair. She was about to get carted off to the makeup table when Ren’s cell phone suddenly began to ring.

It wasn’t the normal ring that Rey was accustomed to hearing, but a deep, dark, almost dirge-like alert. A loud, echoing tone that made her benefactor freeze in place. Rey didn’t have to guess at who it was when Ren answered it with a shaky breath.

“Y-yes, Mr. Snoke?” Both Ren and Rey winced when a booming voice could be heard bleeding through the small speakers of the phone. Ren didn’t even have speaker phone on, and the voice was so loud that the seamstresses across the room could hear it as they ducked their heads and pretended to work.

“Ren!” It roared, making every hair on Rey’s body stand on end. “I need you in London, NOW!”

“Sir,” her benefactor tried to remain cool in the face of immense pressure, but it looked as if every ounce of blood had drained from his incredibly pale face. “What happened?”

“I have Kanata breathing down my neck, Ren, because of the allowances you gave her in the first round of negotiations, and I need you here to deal with her. You’re the one that promised her all of those incentives, you bloody fool.”

“The negotiations are taking place on Tuesday, sir. Hux, Phasma, and I have already booked our flight.”

“They can come on Tuesday, but I need you here, as soon as possible. The earliest flight I could find you was tomorrow morning at 7.” Ren pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply.

“I have a charity event to go to tonight, sir,” Ren tried to explain, but was unceremoniously cut off.

“Tell them you’re sorry by throwing them an extra ten grand and cancel it, Ren. I want the projections for the Takodana account on my desk as soon as you arrive in London. Now go home and get to work!”

Nothing else was said as Ren slipped the phone back into his pocket and slowly turned to face Rey. The look on his face was enough to inform her that all of her grand expectations had been devastated by the truth of their reality.

They weren’t going out. Their night was officially ruined.

A tidal-sized wave of disappointment crashed over Rey as she struggled to keep it in check. For a girl who was so used to disappointment, Rey thought that she should be able to handle herself better, but she was failing spectacularly as bitter tears filled the corners of her eyes. 

“I am so sorry,” he breathed, standing there in the middle of the studio, completely helpless against the demands of his job.

“It’s okay,” she replied shakily, trying not to let him see just how wrecked she was over this monumental let down.

“No, it’s not okay,” he practically growled, running his hands through his hair with a stiff tug of the ends. “Nothing about this is okay.” The man clenched his fists at his sides, almost shaking with the anger and frustration he felt. 

“Do you,” she started, having to swallow a lump in her throat. “Do you want Rook to take me home?” Rey started twisting her fingers together in anticipation of his response. They had been looking forward to spending this night together all week and the thought of him traveling for an undetermined amount of time left her feeling bereft. 

“No,” his eyes grew steely, and defiant. “No, you’re coming home with me.” He went over to the chair and retrieved her bag, a sense of determination in his step.

“What?” He ignored her and passed Ventress a few bills from his wallet. She was pretty sure they were hundreds.

“I’m sorry about this, Asajj,” Ren apologized. “I’ll keep in touch for the next event.”

“It’s always a pleasure working with you, Mr. Ren,” Ventress bowed slightly before leaving the room, counting the money on her way out.

“Let’s go,” Ren passed her the bag and they walked out of the studio onto the darkening streets of a cool Corellia evening. Rook was nowhere to be seen and Ren pulled out his phone while walking a few steps ahead. Rey didn’t know what was happening, and she didn’t like being left in the dark, but she definitely liked it when he took control and arranged everything for her so she didn’t have to worry.

“I need a four am pick-up to JFK tomorrow, Rook. I’ll call you later if I need you, but for now, you can have the night off.” The phone call was short and perfunctory and over before Rey could even catch the words. When they finally registered in her brain, she looked up at her benefactor with hope in her eyes.

“What are we doing?” Rey asked, her voice breathy as she tried to keep up with his long legs on the firm pavement. He was walking incredibly fast, his goal a single-minded purpose.

“Snoke might control most of my life but he doesn’t control all of it,” Ren called behind him as she struggled to keep up. He reached behind to grab her hand, pulling her up next to him as she jogged to catch up. “We can’t go to the event, but we can still have our cooking lesson.”

Rey brightened up instantly, her previous disappointment still present, but slowly being swept away by his newfound promise. They might not have the glitzy, fancy night she had predicted, but they could still salvage the rest of the evening by staging their lesson tonight. 

And now she didn’t have to worry about her feet hurting in those ridiculous heels.

“But what about your work?” She asked him as his jaw ticked in frustration. “Don’t you have a lot to do before your trip?”

“Anything I don’t get done tonight can be taken care of on the seven hour plane ride to London.” He shook his head angrily. “Besides, who knows if I’ll even be able to sleep tonight. I have to leave for my flight at four in the morning.” Rey sympathized with him, hating his boss more than ever for upending their plans and throwing Mr. Ren into a frenzy. No wonder the man lacked a social life, his boss ruined every opportunity for him to enjoy himself.

But Snoke couldn’t ruin this, she thought to herself. He was thousands of miles away, and Mr. Ren was right here, holding her hand and making time specifically for her.

There was a certain skip to her step now as she walked with Ren through the emptying streets of Corellia. The sun was making its descent on the horizon as they walked the ten or so blocks from Ventress’ boutique to The Hosnian Prime. Mr. Ren didn’t let go of her hand once, and she kept catching him staring down at her every time she was trying to steal a glance at him. It made that warm feeling in the pit of her stomach blossom as the doormen held open the entrance to his apartment building for them.

Their stroll through town was now over, but they held hands the entire way to his apartment, his thumb tracing small circles on her skin. She closed her eyes at the sensation, believing for a moment that he truly did return her feelings. Why else would he be making time for her when he easily could have rescheduled their lesson until after his trip? Why else would he be staring at her with such tenderness in his dark gaze?

Rey couldn’t think of a single logical reason, so she went with her gut instinct.

Ren finally dropped her hand when the elevator opened into his foyer. Despite the private elevator code, the foyer door was locked in the off-chance that someone was able to access Ren’s floor. She waited patiently while he unlocked it, and he stepped aside to allow her entrance to his domain.

The apartment felt eerily large with no lights on as she took in the swirling colors of the setting sun through his giant windows. Beams of light cast long shadows from the furniture as she walked into the living room and placed her bag on the leather loveseat. Mr. Ren was busying himself with turning on the lights and getting his home ready for guests. She enjoyed watching him in his element, admiring his towering form from afar as he rejoined her in his living room.

For a moment, the two of them stood there, on opposite sides of the loveseat, waiting for the other person to speak first. It was barely seven o’clock, and there was still a lot of evening ahead of them as Rey wondered what would happen next.

“I should call the charity,” he ran a hand through his hair. “So I can apologize for canceling and set up my yearly donation.”

“Go ahead,” she urged. “We have plenty of time.” The implication of her statement weighed heavily on her as Mr. Ren took a deep inhale.

“Yes,” he breathed. “Are you hungry?”

“A little,” the answer to that question was usually yes, but tonight her stomach seemed to be too filled with butterflies to register as being hungry. “What are we going to make?”

“Well,” he rubbed the back of his neck bashfully. “I only bought a little bit of food since I won’t be home for a while. I didn’t want to leave anything in the fridge.” He looked apologetic. “I thought we were making breakfast, so all I have is eggs and bacon.”

“That’s fine,” she nodded, ready to prepare anything with him as long as he was by her side. “We’ll have breakfast for dinner. I like that.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, his regard warm. “I like that, too.” There was a short pause where Rey felt as if she could feel his attraction for her from all the way across the loveseat. His eyes were intense and focused only on her. “I’ll be right back.”

Rey sat on the loveseat and checked her bag once more, removing her cell phone and making sure her earrings were still tucked away safely. She regretted the fact that she would not be wearing them tonight, but secretly believed that a night in was the better option for her and Mr. Ren. Everything about their quiet evening alone seemed infinitely more intimate than mooching around with the upper class as a new round of fantasies came to life in her mind.

“Yes, put me down for fifty, in order to express my deepest regrets that we will not be attending. . .” Rey was only half listening as Mr. Ren made arrangements with his charity, but it was the number fifty that suddenly drew her attention to his phone call. Since the man gave out hundred dollar bills like they were singles, she was pretty sure that Mr. Ren had just donated fifty thousand dollars to his charity without blinking an eye. Fifty thousand dollars. It was enough for an entire year of college, written off as if it were nothing by a man who literally had everything within his reach. Sometimes the extent of his wealth truly overwhelmed her. 

When he finally ended the call, Rey was practically shaking in anticipation as she joined him in the kitchen. He pulled up the sleeves of his burgundy sweater and started pulling things out of the fridge and onto the marble countertops of his kitchen island.

“Question number one, Miss Jackson,” he posed as their lesson officially began. “How many ingredients do you need to make scrambled eggs?”

Rey shrugged her shoulders, never having cracked an egg in her life. “Um, one? Eggs?”

“Wrong,” he sniffed imperiously. “The perfect scrambled eggs require five ingredients.”

“Five?” She echoed. “But it’s just eggs!”

He pointed at the items on the countertop. “You need eggs, milk, butter, salt, and pepper, Miss Jackson. These are the tools you need as well.” Two black skillets were already waiting to be used on the jets of the stovetop, one for the eggs and the other for the bacon. He also had a flat wooden tool, along with a whisk and a cooking fork for the meat. 

“Why do you need all that stuff?” She asked. “It’s just eggs.”

“You will see, Miss Jackson. Now, follow my lead.” He took an egg out of the carton and showed Rey the proper way to crack it open. She already felt overwhelmed as it landed in the mixing bowl with a plop. “Now you try.”

Rey picked up the egg as if it were growing arms out of it. She tried to hold it in the same way as Mr. Ren, but it felt awkward between her fingers. When she tried to tap it on the side of the marble countertop like he had, she overestimated how much force to use and wound up splattering egg all over her hands. Drippy yellow yolk slid down the marble and pooled onto the immaculate hardwood floors.

A deep rumble could be heard behind her. “Nice job,” he smirked at her, his tone sarcastic. His eyes were alight with mischief as he took in her eggy hands. 

“Oi!” She pointed a yellow finger at him. “Be nice or there will literally be egg on your face, Mr. Ren. Don’t tempt me.”

“Are you threatening to contaminate me with Salmonella in my own home?” He reached for some disinfecting wipes stored under the sink while she waited to wash her hands. “After all I’ve done for you?” 

“Let me try again,” she washed her hands clean while he wiped up the egg. “I’ve never done this before.” She reached for another egg and was more methodical this time, using less force on the corner edge, but this time the egg didn’t crack at all. She let out something akin to a growl in frustration and tried again, much harder this time.

The egg burst into a mess of shell shards and yellow goo.

Rey stomped her foot in anger, letting out a sound that was a strange mix between a grunt and a scream as she shook off the excess slop. Another sound could be heard behind her then, a steady, deep reverb that started out low then built quickly in volume and echoed throughout the entire living space. She turned around to face her benefactor slowly, not believing what she was hearing as she took in his bent over frame.

Mr. Ren was laughing.

No, he wasn’t just laughing, Mr. Ren was doubled over in hysterics, grabbing at his stomach as he howled at her misfortune. The sound of it was loud, booming, and the best thing she had ever heard in her life. It was so different from the sarcastic, simpering chuckles and the short huffs of mirth she was used to hearing from him. This was the kind of laughter that was rare for most people, let alone Mr. Ren.

Rey couldn’t help it. Even with sticky raw egg dripping off of her hands, and yellow goo sliding onto the floor, Rey had to join Mr. Ren and laugh at her own inexperience. She started hopping from one foot to the other, her face a reflection of the disgust she truly felt as she played off of his humor.

“Ewww,” she whined. “It’s gross!”

“Go wash your hands!” He commanded through his cackling, pointing towards the sink. “You’re getting it everywhere!”

“Ew, ew, ew,” she repeated, stepping over the egg on the floor and purposefully making faces at him to keep his laughter going as long as humanly possible. God, she didn’t want it to ever end.

“I have grossly overestimated your cooking prowess, Miss Jackson,” he shook his head, the laughter finally dying down. “I don’t know if I have enough disinfecting wipes for this.”

“Maybe you should get a cleaning lady while you’re away,” she teased.

“You’re gonna be my cleaning lady if you don’t help me!” His eyes were glowing with humor as she wet a paper towel and started removing the goo that was now drying onto the surfaces of Mr. Ren’s kitchen. Mr. Ren then went over the same area with the disinfecting wipes in order to kill any bacteria from the raw egg. “That will be how you pay for college from now on.”

She laughed at his twisted sense of humor. “Then who will go to all the events with you?” His lips turned up in another smirk.

“I’m on good terms with Hux again,” he wiggled his eyebrows at her playfully. “He looks good in a suit.”

Rey couldn’t help but tilt her head back as more laughter pealed out of her. This was a side of Mr. Ren she had never seen before as she was blinded by his genuine smile. She could even see the whites of his adorably crooked teeth, something he rarely ever exposed. 

“Maybe eggs were the wrong item to start with,” he mused as he helped her get off the floor. The space had been wiped down twice with all of Mr. Ren’s remaining cleaning supplies, and the ingredients of their meal were still sitting there, waiting to be prepared. “But no matter. I will demonstrate how to cook the meal, and you will watch. Maybe next time you’ll have more luck with the practical aspects of cooking.” Ren was still shaking off the lingering smiles as his cheery demeanor melted back into his normal countenance.

“By all means, Masterchef Ren. I am here for your tutelage.” They shared one more smile before Ren got to work, outlining the recipe and the steps to make the perfect scrambled eggs. He measured out the milk, but allowed her to pour it into the egg mixture. He let her season the eggs with the salt and pepper, scolding her when she put in too much salt. Then Ren watched as Rey placed a pat of butter on the bottom of the warming pan, swirling it around so that the entire bottom was covered. Mr. Ren was preparing the bacon as Rey waited patiently for more instructions.

“Now the trick is to constantly stir the eggs while they cook over low heat, so they don’t dry out or burn.” She stood by his side the entire time, soaking in all of his instructions. Rey paid extra special attention on his technique to avoid burning bacon as the smell of breakfast filled the air. Ren even brewed her a cup of tea while he made himself a quick cup of decaf coffee from his Keurig. 

By the time breakfast-for-dinner was done cooking, the sun had officially set on Corellia, and Rey set the table as thousands of lights twinkled below them. Mr. Ren had informed her that he lived on the twentieth floor of his high-rise, and she could tell from the panoramic view around them as she took in the sight before her. She liked the idea of looking down at the world from such great heights, but in the dark it looked like a blanket of twinkling stars as far as the eye could see. 

They ate in companionable silence, and every now and then Rey caught Ren staring at her with a soft smile on his face that she eagerly returned. While the meal wasn’t the fancy dinner she had been expecting, it tasted like the best thing she had ever eaten. Also, the eggs were pretty delicious, as Mr. Ren had promised. 

“That was fun,” she commented as he started to clear the plates away. Rey was munching on the final piece of bacon as she looked at the time. It was getting late, and she knew she had to leave soon. Ren still had so much work to do, and had to wake up incredibly early for his flight. “What time is Mr. Rook picking me up?”

Mr. Ren went into the kitchen, not looking back at her. “I haven’t called him,” was his steady reply. Her heart skipped a beat when he didn’t say anything else.

“Really?” He rejoined her in the living room, running a hand through his hair as he fidgeted.

“Yeah, well,” he looked away bashfully, a blush forming on his pale skin. “You said you would sleep over,” his voice dropped in both volume and tone and it caused goosebumps to trail down her arms.

“I did,” she agreed, her body igniting like a blowtorch.

“If you don’t mind waking up early,” he reached forward, entwining their fingers together as her breath caught. “I thought you could drive with me to the airport. Then Rook can take you home.”

If Rey needed any further confirmation of his feelings, this was it. Ren was expecting her to say yes, he wanted her to say yes to this. He wanted to share a bed with her, he wanted to sleep beside her, he wanted her to be there when he left for London. What other evidence did she need?

“Yes,” her response gasped out of her, the feelings inside her too overwhelming to contain in just one syllable. “I’ll stay.”

His eyes crinkled as a grin pulled up his cheeks. “It’s still early,” he walked them into the living room and handed her the remote. “Pick out something you like and I’ll try to get some work done before bed.” They shared a look filled with promise as she sat down on his sofa. He returned to the living room moments later, sitting on the other end of the sofa while setting up his laptop. For the next hour, Rey watched cooking shows on Netflix. Every now and then she tried to distract Ren by asking him whether or not he believed she could make whatever was being shown.

His answer was always no.

It was a perfectly relaxing evening, and Rey knew deep down in her bones that while they had missed out on a wonderful night out, she had just experienced the best night of her life here alone with Mr. Ren, botching his cooking lessons and distracting him from work. The simple, easy rapport they shared was addictive and she couldn’t get enough of the domesticity of existing in this space with him. Cooking and cleaning and lounging and sleeping over… it sounded so simple yet brought Rey so much joy. 

At around ten pm, Ren finally closed his laptop, and the sound of the shutting screen made her heart thud loudly in her chest. He yawned and stood from the couch, stretching so hard that his sweater started to ride up as her eyes landed on the pale stripe of exposed skin. He turned to face her, his expression curiously flat.

“Are you ready for bed?”

Rey nodded, grabbing her overnight bag as expectation weighed heavily in the air. While she had slept in the same bed as him earlier in the week, it had been the middle of the night. They had been half asleep and everything had felt foggy and surreal. 

Tonight, everything was different. Deliberate. Purposeful in a way that made her toes curl as Ren started to lead her into the bedroom. He went to the closet where he pulled out a small black rolling suitcase, and began folding up items to bring with him on his trip. 

“Get ready,” he nodded towards his master bathroom. “This will only take a minute.”

“Alright,” she said, walking into the bathroom and shutting the door as her entire body trembled in excitement. She had to splash her face with some water in order to cool down her cheeks as she took in the brightness of her eyes. She had no idea what was going to happen next, but whatever it was, she was ready for it.

Rey changed into her pajamas quickly, putting up her hair and brushing her teeth before rejoining Ren in his bedroom. He was programming his alarm clock for four am in order to make it to JFK with enough time for his international flight. He was shirtless again, in nothing but a pair of soft charcoal sweatpants as she looked down at her tank top and pants. She had purposefully gone without a bra, feeling bold as she plugged in her cell phone and slid into the covers next to him.

Soon enough, Ren shut off the lights and settled into bed. This time, however, instead of turning his back to her, he shifted to his side so that their eyes met from their respective pillows.

“So, what do you think?” He asked her, but she could barely see his expression in the dark. Rey could make out little more than shadows on top of other shadows. 

“About what?” She asked, making herself as comfortable as possible on the silky sheets. 

“About sleeping next to someone,” he clarified. “Was it everything you hoped it would be?”

If Rey were another girl, she would use this opportunity to flirt with Mr. Ren, or throw herself at him, or make advances or innuendos that could potentially lead to sex. She would wrap her arms around him and entice him for more, or drop hints that there were other things that they could do besides sleep and grab him by the hip to make her intention clear.

But Rey was not one of those girls. She didn’t know how to be that kind of girl, and to be honest, she didn’t want to. The hard truth was that Rey wasn’t ready for sex, even if Mr. Ren propositioned her for it right now. The fact that they were together, in his bed, breathing the same air and enjoying one another’s company, that was enough for Rey. It was more than she had ever dreamed of having in her life, and she would not take it for granted.

“Yes,” she agreed, choking through the emotion in her voice. “It’s everything I’d hoped for and more.”

“Yes,” he echoed. “I feel the same. Why do you think that is?” 

She shrugged into her pillow. “Maybe because we’re so used to being alone.”

Rey felt him nod. “But we know we are not alone anymore.”

“No,” she said, reaching her hand out to grab his in the darkness. “We’re not.” Their fingers met against the expanse of silken fabric and in that instant, a feeling of absolute peace washed over them both as they exhaled at the same time. Every point of contact between them felt right and no other words needed to be said as sleep welcomed them with ease. They fell asleep facing one another, their fingertips pressing in a soothing act of reassurance. 

When Rey woke up, however, they were no longer in the same position.

It was a warm, wet sensation that originally alerted her senses to his ministrations, a pressing of skin to skin on the junction of her neck and shoulders. Strong arms held her in place as her body undulated against the hard planes of the body behind her. A low moan breathed across her skin, lips eagerly moving along the curve of her neck as the friction behind her left her gasping for air. Something hard was pressing up against her backside, something that caused delicious aftershocks to tremor inside of her in its wake.

A breathy sigh escaped her as the strong arm caressed higher, cupping itself around a small breast as her back arched into the hardness behind her. Still half-asleep, she wanted to reciprocate the delicious attention being paid, but she found herself completely entranced by his actions. Wave after wave of frenzied heat drowned her into submission and she never wanted it to end. A groan that sounded like it had been pulled from the depths of the void reverberated around her as the lips pressed more firmly, leaving behind wet marks that made her shiver. 

That was when his alarm started to ring, a shrill, sonic boom of sound in the thick silence of the room. The strong arm around her body went tense before snapping away from her, and she groaned in annoyance as Mr. Ren cursed loudly in the darkness of his bedroom. 

“Fuck!” 

Rey blinked away the lingering sleep, her body feeling liquid with passion. “Ren?” She reached over to his side of the bed but he was already on his way to the bathroom. She could still hear him cursing, a steady litany of “fuck, fuck, fuck,” following him around as he tried to get ready for his flight.

“Get up, Rey,” was his firm command as he exited the bathroom, and she blinked when he suddenly turned on the lights, momentarily blinding her.

“Ugh,” she groaned, throwing the pillow over her head and wanting him to come back to bed so he could never stop kissing her neck. If that’s what it felt like to be kissed on her skin, she couldn’t wait to get a kiss on the lips. “Do you have to go?” She whined, feeling childish and wanting his body next to hers once more.

“Get. Up. Now.” Was his firm command, punctuated by a toss of her overnight bag onto her still prone form. It hit her leg with a small thud, since there was nothing heavy in it. While she had woken up in a good mood, Mr. Ren was anything but jovial as he rushed to get ready for his trip. She went into the bathroom to take care of herself and when she came back, Mr. Ren was still frantic in preparation. His phone was ringing and Rook’s name was flashing on the screen.

“I think Rook is here,” she replied groggily, wishing he wasn’t in such a rush to leave as she slipped on her sneakers, too tired to change into actual clothes.

“Come on,” he packed away his cell phone and laptop in his carrying case and was dressed in all black from head to toe, from his dress slacks to the light wool peacoat he was carrying for the chilly London weather. Still in her pajamas, she grabbed her cell phone and charger and did a quick check to make sure everything was in her bag. The last thing she did was grab her jacket to throw on over her pajamas as she was practically pushed out of the door.

Ren was quiet in the elevator, his body language stiff and tense as silence stretched out before them. He hadn’t said a thing to her besides the orders he’d barked at her, and she didn’t know how to respond to the way they had woken up. It had been the most sensual, sexual moment of her life and she still couldn’t believe it had happened. He had been spooning her, kissing her neck. 

He even touched her breast.

She had basically gotten to second base in her sleep and wasn’t even able to enjoy it! Now Ren would be gone for days and he was acting like it had never even happened as he steadfastly ignored her. It was a favorite past-time of his, she remembered. He liked to pretend that the awkward things that passed between them never happened, but there was no way she could ever forget the feeling of his lips on her skin.

And she didn’t think he wanted to forget it, either. 

“Do you still want me to come to the airport with you?” She asked, wondering if it would be easier for Rook to just drop her off before they made the trek to Long Island. Ren looked down at her suddenly, a look of panic in his eyes.

“Of course,” he said, balancing both his carry on and his rolling luggage in one hand while the coat draped over the other. “Unless you don’t want to come.”

“I do,” she reassured him with a small smile. “You just seem a little tense this morning, that’s all.”

“Tense?” He repeated. “What a fucking understatement,” was what he muttered under his breath as he ran a hand through his hair. She had never heard him curse so much before, his language and decorum usually unflappable.

Rey wanted to say more, but the elevator doors opened and Ren’s only purpose was to get to the airport and make his flight. She piled into the backseat of the car and Rey scooted over to the far side while Ren threw his luggage into the trunk. He joined Rey in the car and said good morning to a groggy Rook.

“Try to make it there as fast as you can, Rook. I would take the Whitestone bridge instead of the Throgs Neck.”

“Of course, Sir,” was Rook’s reply as they pulled onto the parkway. “We should be there in forty-five minutes.”

Silence filled the car as they merged with the very sparse traffic. It was a Sunday morning at 4:30 am, so they were basically the only car on the road as they made their way south out of Westchester county and into the Bronx. The backseat of the car felt like it stretched for miles with how distant Mr. Ren was acting, and for a moment Rey was worried that he regretted what had happened between them. Maybe he was so tense and frustrated because he hadn’t meant for it to happen at all.

The thought crushed her hopes as she pulled her jacket around her pajamas, feeling cold in the thin material. Her shoulders shivered lightly and she wrapped her arms around herself.

“Come here,” Ren’s voice was low as it beckoned to her. She looked up at him in surprise, not expecting the attention.

“What?” He had his black peacoat draped over his knees and he opened his right arm to her.

“Come on,” he urged, and she could barely make out his expression in the darkened backseat. There was a softness there that sparkled in the lights from the passing street lamps, drawing her nearer to him.

She scooted over, every motion bringing him closer as she nestled into his side. His long, strong arm wrapped around her shoulders once more, reminding her of how he had held her in their sleep. He placed the peacoat over them both, allowing her to lean against his chest as his smell and body heat wrapped around her like a blanket. She relaxed into him, nuzzling her cheek against his black sweater as he let out a long, labored sigh.

“I think this is going to be a long trip, Miss Jackson. I don’t see myself returning anytime soon.”

Rey shook her head, hating the idea of him being gone for so long after everything that had happened. “Do you still want me to call you every day?”

“Please do,” he urged, his hold on her growing tighter. “With Snoke and his lawyers as my only company I will need the reprieve.”

“I hate to mention this,” she said, cringing at the thought of bringing up something as trivial as money when all she wanted to do was hold him. “But my second tuition payment is due on October tenth and you might not be back by then.”

“Do not worry,” he whispered against the crown of her head. “I will take care of everything.”

She had to blink against the sting of tears as his words sunk in, filling her with a calming sense of ease that she rarely ever felt. “Thank you.”

“Thank you, Rey,” he crooned to her gently, never clarifying what he was thanking her for. He seemed content to rest his head on hers and she allowed it, burrowing herself as deep as she could into his side as her arms wrapped around him. They stayed that way for the rest of the ride to Long Island, over the Whitestone Bridge, down the Cross Island Parkway, and onto the giant winding ramps of the Belt parkway that lead to JFK International airport. 

They did not detangle from one another until they saw the signs for his terminal, and she helped him straighten out his shirt from where it had slightly wrinkled. Rook popped the trunk for him when they arrived at the Departures drop-off, and she looked up at her benefactor with longing, not wanting to say goodbye.

“Will you,” she hesitated, usually not one to make demands of him. “Will you call me when you get there? So I know you arrived safely?”

“Of course,” he said warmly, reaching for her hand. “And you will call me every night.”

“I promise.” He placed a warm kiss on her knuckles before stepping away from her.

“Goodbye, Rey,” he said, and she watched as he entered the airport, pulling his luggage behind him and holding onto his peacoat as she stood with Rook on the pavement. The kind chauffeur opened the door for her with a sympathetic smile.

“Don’t worry Miss Rey,” he said, his familiar London street accent reminding her of her youth. “Ren’ll be back sooner than you know it.” She had to chase away the odd sense of foreboding at his words as she climbed into the backseat and made her way back to Corellia. 

She could only hope that his trip was a short one as she fell asleep on the way back upstate.


	13. Distractions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The angst train is pulling up to the station... toot toot

The end of September brought in the cooler days of October in the valleys of upstate New York. Rey was enjoying spending her free time galavanting around the local junkyard, picking out the best pieces of scrap metal for her prototype. When she found the things she needed, she used the soldering tools in the metal works department to piece together the beginnings of the exterior casing. This was the part she enjoyed the most, feeling the heat of the tools and forging together something new and unique. Right now it just looked like junk melted together, but soon enough it would be something truly special. Working on her design was a welcome reprieve from the other thoughts on her mind.

It had been almost two weeks since Mr. Ren left for London, eleven days to be exact. Her tuition bill had been due the day before and she checked her account, smiling fondly at the zeroes in the “Amount Due” column. He hadn’t forgotten about her tuition, which was reassuring, but he seemed to have forgotten that Rey existed which was causing her a fair amount of grief.

The beginning of his trip had started out fine. She had tried to time her phone calls so that it wouldn’t be too late for him, and he had tried to make time for their short, but welcome, conversations. However, the more time he spent in London, the more time he spent with Snoke, and every time he picked up the call he chased her off almost immediately, promising to call her back when his boss wasn’t around. Sometimes he did, but now, after a week and a half, she hadn’t spoken to him in days. There was no mention of when he would be returning, and with every conversation he sounded less like the gentle man who had held her so tightly in bed, and more like the angry man she had met barely five weeks ago.

Rey knew she had to be practical. Mr. Ren was under an immense amount of pressure, and she knew that his boss was a ruthless man. Also, the time difference was incredibly difficult for them to navigate, since she didn’t want to disturb him on the rare occasions he was able to sleep. Snoke kept him working at all hours of the day and night and there was nothing she could do while he was thousands of miles away.

As reasonable as she tried to be, it didn’t erase the core of her pain.

Rey missed him. She missed him terribly. They still hadn’t discussed what had happened between them the morning he left, and the memory of his body against hers made her ache for him in ways she didn’t know were possible. 

But Rey was good at waiting. It didn’t matter how long he was gone, Rey would be here waiting for him to return.

Her Thursday afternoons were always free before her late evening lecture. It was the reason why she never made plans with Mr. Ren on Thursday nights, since the lecture began at 6:30 and ended at 9:30. Rey cleaned up as best as she could from her soldering session and walked to class with Rose, who was also taking the lecture this semester.

“I never finished the reading,” Rose chewed her lip, reaching into her bag for the syllabus. “I hope Krennic doesn’t try to quiz us.” She scanned the paper, trying to find the information she needed as they walked towards the Lecture Hall. “Hey, did you know we’re having a guest speaker tonight?”

Rey looked down at Rose with a tilt of her head. “Really? I didn’t check.”

“Yeah,” she squinted at the page. “But where the name is supposed to be it says ‘TBD’ so maybe it’ll get cancelled. Then I’ll be really screwed.”

Rey gave Rose a reassuring smile. “I’m sure it’ll be okay. You can look at my notes when we get there.”

“You’re the best!” Her roommate squealed as they entered the packed lecture hall. Normally her class of sixty kids barely filled up the seats of the giant room, but today it felt like the space was packed with people as Rey and Rose squeezed in the front to find decent seats.

“Whoa,” Rey breathed, looking around at all the students, faculty, and guests that were filling her Thursday night class. Whoever this guest speaker was, her class was now the hottest event on campus as she spied the college president, Mr. Ren’s mother, directly in front of her at the dais. She was speaking to Director Krennic and a tall, older man she didn’t know. The man, who looked vaguely familiar to Rey, smiled at the shorter woman next to him. The look of absolute adoration that President Organa shared with him gave her pause.

A memory flashed before her, of a glamorous night filled with lies. . . _“Your father is going to do a series of lectures at the college.”_

Rey had a pretty good idea who her guest speaker was for the evening.

Rose and Rey were sitting a few rows in, and for a moment she wished they had sat all the way in the back as she ducked her head and tried not to draw attention to herself. She glanced up at the dais when Director Krennic called for everyone’s attention.

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, students and staff, administration and guests,” he greeted, warmly opening his arms to the lecture hall. “And welcome to the first part of a series of lectures by the great American hero, Commander Han Solo.” A loud, raucous explosion of applause filled the lecture hall, and Rey was aghast at the reaction Mr. Ren’s father was receiving. Rey knew that Ren had a shaky relationship with his father, but she had no idea that the man was a national hero. 

“Before I hand over the floor to the man who saved the lives of two Americans and three Russian cosmonauts during a critical malfunction of the Mir space station in 1995, I present to you his lovely wife, my boss, and the president of this college, Leia Organa-Solo.” Rey blanched when she heard the word ‘space’ as another round of enthusiastic applause filled the hall. Ren’s mother approached the dais, wearing a pair of very familiar diamond earrings as she began her introduction.

“Good evening, all,” she said warmly, her eyes wrinkling at the corners as she smiled. “This series of lectures is a collaboration between the engineering department, the science department, and the math department, in an effort to show students that the real world requires far more than brains and test scores to achieve greatness.” She nodded sagely. “In order to be truly great you must have tenacity, and courage, and strength of character. Add that to a knack for problem solving and you have what it takes to succeed in the most harrowing of times. I am thrilled to introduce to you all my husband, Commander Han Solo, who has survived more life-threatening situations than I care to admit.” She released a shaky laugh that some in the audience echoed, before turning to her husband. “Darling, I leave the floor to you.”

Once again, the hall erupted in praise of their guest of honor. The man stood up and buttoned his navy sport coat before approaching the dais. He waved his arms at the crowd as if he was tired of all the attention as a rueful smile graced his well-hewn features. 

“Alright, alright,” his lips were pulled up in a half-grin. “Enough of that, now can it.” People laughed as Rey stared at Mr. Ren’s father, noticing the resemblance between father and son. They both had the same stubborn jaw, and the same knowing eyes as he gazed out into the crowd before him.

“I started working for NASA when I was twenty two years old, in 1964.” He started his speech as Rey’s jaw dropped. Now she understood why Mr. Ren had choked on his soup all those weeks ago. “I wasn’t selected for any kind of missions until I was in my forties. By then most astronauts are thinking of retiring when I hadn’t even begun. Most of my career was spent developing the technology for one of the shuttles, called the Falcon. I was the first to fly her into orbit.”

Rey sat in rapt attention, soaking in every detail of Han Solo’s exploits with the Falcon shuttle. She couldn’t believe that the man in front of her, this beloved hero adored by millions, was Mr. Ren’s father. His career was everything that Rey had been dreaming of her entire life, working for NASA, going into space, developing new technology. It was every dream she ever had funneled into one person.

And she had to find a way to meet him.

Her first option was to ask Mr. Ren, but she immediately chased it off as an impossibility. He was in London, with no time frame on when he was returning. Even if he were here and she asked him to arrange some kind of meeting, Rey was pretty sure Ren would say no. There were so many questions she wanted to ask Commander Solo, so many ideas she wanted to run by him, and if Mr. Ren wasn’t around to help her, then she knew someone else that could.

“The most important part of my job was fixing all the terrible stuff that went wrong,” Commander Solo remarked with a wry smile. “Up on the space station, if something happened, you and your crew were the only ones you could rely on for survival. The people back on Earth could only do so much, and knowing how to problem solve is the reason why I’m here today. You can crunch all the numbers you want, and plan all the scenarios a million times, but nothing prepares you for when the shit hits the fan.” President Organa coughed behind her while most of the audience laughed again. She didn’t look happy at her husband’s language.

Commander Solo spoke for a little while longer, highlighting his favorite memories and experiences as a NASA astronaut. He informed the audience that the schedule for his lecture series was posted on the bulletin board outside the hall, and Rey knew she was going to attend every single one. 

With a standing ovation for their guest, Rey’s Thursday evening class ended about 25 minutes early, a welcome reprieve from her very busy schedule. Midterms were coming up within the next week and Rey found herself inundated with homework. However, there was something that she needed to do before she could return home and enjoy her free time.

“Rose, I’m going to stay and try to meet him.” Rey wasn’t the only student with a similar idea. Dozens of students and staff were waiting for a chance to meet the famous Han Solo, but Rey had a better idea than standing in a crowd. 

“Good luck!” Rose wished. “I’m gonna go home and catch up on the reading before I get even more behind. I’ll see you later!”

Rey waved goodbye and collected her books slowly, waiting a few more minutes as more people cleared out of the lecture hall. While there was still a crowd waiting for a chance to meet Commander Solo, Rey started walking towards President Organa, who was standing to the side and talking to Director Krennic.

“Excuse me,” she cleared her throat, hoping the woman recognized her without the fancy clothes. “President Organa?” The woman turned around with a kind smile, but tilted her head in confusion before finally recognizing her.

“Rey?” She nodded and the woman’s face began to glow. “Rey, my dear! It’s so good to see you!” Instantly, Rey was wrapped in a tight maternal hug, Leia bouncing from side to side happily.

“It’s wonderful to see you again, Leia,” Director Krennic gave them an odd look before excusing himself to talk to other members of staff in attendance. The two women were now mostly alone, as all attention was still on Han. 

“Is this one of your classes?” Leia asked with a smile. 

“Yes, this is my Thursday night lecture,” Rey nodded, falling into her role as Ren’s fake-girlfriend. “I cannot believe Ben didn’t tell me his father was an American hero.”

Leia waved it off with a frown. “Those two mix as well as oil and vinegar. It’s been that way Ben’s whole life.” She smiled ruefully. “How is my boy? I haven’t heard from him in weeks.”

“Well, he’s still in London,” Rey said, her tone a true reflection of longing. “He’s been there for a while, now. I hope he comes home soon.”

Leia clucked her teeth in annoyance. “I used to hate when he went to London. Every time he came home for a visit it was like talking to a stranger.” Rey hated the sudden feeling of unease that surged through her. She had to shake it away quickly in order to continue the conversation.

“I’m actually going to try to call him in a little bit. But before I go, I kind of want a chance to meet your husband. It’s always been a dream of mine to work for NASA and I have so many questions for him.” If Ren was going to use her to get what he wanted, then she was going to use him to get what she wanted. It was only fair.

Leia’s eyes brightened as she grinned widely. “Hold on, I’ll get him.” She turned around and walked Rey over to her husband, who was still fielding off questions and signing autographs. “Han!”

The man continued to talk, holding up a finger at his wife. “One moment, Sweetheart.”

“Han!” She adopted a tone that made her husband freeze in place. It was probably the same tone she had been using on him for decades. “Come here and meet Ben’s girlfriend!”

The man turned around instantly, staring at his wife in open-mouthed surprise. “Girlfriend?” He took a step closer to them as the lingering crowd started to disperse, no longer grabbing their hero’s attention. “Ben has a girlfriend?” Leia pushed Rey forward with a little nudge as the older man took her hand.

“Hello, my name is Rey Jackson.” The man shook her hand slowly, like he couldn’t believe she was real. 

“And you’re Ben’s girlfriend?” He looked over to his wife who nodded enthusiastically. “Hold on, I think my Congressional Medal of Honor is in my car. I’m gonna go get it. You deserve it more than I do.”

“Han!” Leia smacked her husband on the arm of his sport coat as Rey laughed.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.” She laughed at his incredulous look.

“Rey has always dreamed of working at NASA, Han. She has many questions for you.” Leia was beaming as she rubbed her hands together. “I think we should have a dinner with Ben and Rey so she can have a more private backdrop to discuss things with you.”

Rey rubbed the back of her neck, knowing that Mr. Ren would rather eat shards of glass than share a meal with his father. “I’ll have to ask him when he gets home from London.”

Just then, her phone started to vibrate in her pocket, still on silent from being in class. Rey pulled it out and to her complete surprise and slight horror, Mr. Ren was calling her at that very moment.

“Is that him?” Leia asked excitedly. Rey nodded and was forced to answer it under the watchful eyes of his parents. 

“Hey Ben,” she greeted warmly, turning around so she didn’t have to look at his parent’s faces.

“Ben?” He spat out rudely, and she could instantly tell that he was in a sour mood. “Miss Jackson, you are supposed to be in class until 9:30, why did you answer your phone?”

“I’m standing here with your parents,” she said with false brightness. “Your father was the guest speaker for my class tonight.”

There was a beat of silence before Mr. Ren’s deep voice bled from the speakers. He did not sound happy at this news. “How wonderful,” he spat bitterly. “I can only assume they’re listening to every word you say.”

“Yes, it was a great lecture,” she improvised, turning around to give his parents a thumbs-up. “Your parents say hi.”

He ignored that bit of information like she hadn’t said anything at all. “I was calling to leave a message, Miss Jackson. I am home from London.”

“Oh!” she gasped, truly surprised. He hadn’t even told her he was returning. “Welcome home.”

“He’s home?” Leia echoed behind her. “Ask him about dinner!”

“Um,” she hedged, stuck between a rock and a hard place. “Your parents want us all to have dinner soon. What do you think?”

“I think the devil will need a parka before I ever share a meal with that man again,” he growled, and luckily her speakers were poor enough that his parents could not hear him. Rey looked up at Leia with a grimace.

“He said he would check his schedule.”

Ren’s frustrated sigh drew her attention back to the phone call. “You and I need to speak, Miss Jackson. Immediately.” 

Rey shook her head, confused at his tone and his demand. She took a few steps away from his parents for a bit more privacy as she lowered her voice. 

“We never meet on Thursdays,” she rushed. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m calling Rook,” he urged, his tone brokering no argument. “He’s coming to get you.”

“Tell him to pick me up in the parking lot behind the library and the lecture hall.” With that he abruptly hung up on her, and everything about their conversation left her feeling uneasy as she frowned down at her phone. What could he possibly want to talk about that can’t wait a few days?

Rey turned around to face his parents once more. “He said he would keep in touch, but he was really busy at work. I don’t know when dinner can happen.”

“Regardless,” Leia pulled out a business card, handing it over to Rey. “The number on the bottom is my personal office number. Call me any time and we can schedule a lunch with or without Mr. High-and-Mighty.”

“Thank you so much,” she hugged Leia once more before shaking Commander Solo’s hand again. She couldn’t wait to schedule time to talk to him about her design, and the potential of her idea. With a final goodbye, Rey exited the lecture hall, wrapping her jacket around her tighter in the chilly October night air. It took a few minutes for Rook to arrive, but when he did Rey texted Rose to let her know that she wouldn’t be home for a while. 

Rey did not know what to expect as Mr. Rook pulled up in front of the Hosnian Prime. Everything about Ren’s abrupt phone call left her feeling hesitant to see him. He had been gone for so long, and she had missed him so much, but the man she had spoken to did not sound like the man she had missed so dearly. There had been so much left unsaid between them, plus his concealment of his father’s career from her. It felt very much like she was entering a battlefield instead of a home as she walked into his darkened living room from the open foyer. The apartment was eerily quiet as she called out for her benefactor.

“In the office, Miss Jackson.” Rey followed the voice down the long hallway, where one of the doors was open directly across from the bathroom. It was a room that she had never been in before as she took in the sight of her benefactor sitting at the large cherry wood desk before her, typing away at his laptop.

“Hi,” she still had her backpack from class, filled with her laptop and her heavy textbooks. She balanced it on one shoulder and stood awkwardly before him. There were no other chairs in his private office and the only light came from his computer screen and a single desk lamp.

He didn’t even lift his eyes up to look at her. Almost two weeks after the best morning of her life and the man was acting like she wasn’t even there.

She remembered Leia’s comment from earlier. A stranger indeed.

“Thank you for coming on such short notice,” he continued to type. “We have much to discuss.”

“Alright,” she had to swallow past the lump of nervousness in her throat. “What’s the matter?”

“Why were you speaking to my parents?” He asked, finally looking up at her with accusations in his eyes. She stood her ground and got ready for one of their trademark arguments, feeling hurt and defensive already after so much time apart.

“They were the guest speakers at my lecture. I was being polite.”

“By scheduling dinner with them?” He sneered as he stood from his seat. He leaned over his desk and she had forgotten just how tall and intimidating he could be. “When I specifically told you that I didn’t get along with my father?”

“Yes, the father who works for NASA. The one you conveniently forgot to tell me about!” She argued.

“Did he wow you with his tales of bravery and sacrifice?” He sneered, coming around the desk to face her. “Did he impress you with his heroics?”

She shook her head at him, crossing her arms over her chest. “I don’t know why you hate him so much, but you should have told me he worked for NASA. You know how much I want to work there and he promised to answer my questions. I saw an opportunity and I took it.”

The man before her was vibrating with anger as his fists clenched at his sides. “How dare you go behind my back. . .”

Rey cut him off with bravado. “I’m just doing what you taught me, Mr. Ren,” her eyes narrowed as she threw his words from weeks ago back at him. “I’m taking advantage of every possible resource.”

Ren’s nostrils flared as he towered over her, breathing deeply as he painted a picture of fury. “I called you here for a reason, Miss Jackson. Changes must be made to our arrangement.”

Rey didn’t move a muscle as her entire body froze. “What kind of changes?” She didn’t like the look in his eyes, it was a sinister, unfamiliar look that was not there before he left for London.

“My time away has reminded me of my priorities,” he turned away from her, now looking at the view from his window. 

“Priorities?” She echoed, hating the way her stomach began to twist. “Like what?”

“Like my job, Miss Jackson. My career. My future with First Order Incorporated. Everything else is a distraction and must be eliminated.” When he turned to face her she noticed the dark circles under his eyes, and the gaunt, hollow look of his face. It was almost as if the soul had been sucked right out of him as his words crushed her heart into dust.

“A distraction,” she nodded her head, understanding his meaning perfectly. She was the distraction in his life right now as sorrow seeped out of every pore. “That’s why you haven’t been calling me back.”

“I had Snoke breathing down my neck for days, wondering who kept calling me and what they wanted. There were only so many excuses I could make.”

Her eyes widened in genuine fear. “Did you tell him about me?” He turned away from her again.

“I had to tell Snoke something. He knows I’ve been spending time with a female acquaintance. He doesn’t know anything specific about you or the fact that you’re my protegee.” When he faced her, it was with the eyes of a stranger. “Which is all that you are.”

Rey winced at his harsh words. She had been such a fool to think that he actually cared for her. “If this is about what happened on Sunday morning. . .”

“What happened was inappropriate and accidental. It should never have happened and it will never happen again. Our arrangement is one of business, and it must remain that way from now on.” Her heart was breaking but she willed herself not to break down in front of this man. She had to remain strong.

“I understand completely,” she nodded her head, choking back a sob. Snoke had found a way to twist up Ren’s head and turn him against her. She steeled herself against all emotion, trying to be as cold and detached as the man before her as she returned his sneer with a slow shake of her head. “To think that I actually missed you,” she remarked bitterly as his eyes popped open at her.

With that confession, she turned on her heels and walked out of the office, heading straight for the foyer. She didn’t even blink when she heard him calling her name.

“Rey!” She kept going, ignoring his use of her given name. “Rey, wait!”

“No,” she refused to turn around as he followed her into the foyer. She slammed her thumb on the button, willing the elevator to materialize so she could get as far away from Kylo Ren as possible.

“We are not done speaking!” He stood to the side, his jaw working around his anger as his eye twitched. 

“You’ve said more than enough,” Rey remarked blithely. “It’s late and I have class in the morning.”

“W-we have events this weekend,” he rushed, trying to get her to talk to him. She wouldn’t look at him and couldn’t stand to talk to him for a minute longer. 

“I’m working,” she stared straight ahead of her at the wall. “You never told me you were coming home and I picked up extra shifts.” Where was this damn elevator? She just wanted to get away from this man so she could go home and cry.

“You can’t leave yet,” his voice started to sound panicked, but she ignored it. She could be just as ruthless and heartless as he could on the rare occasions she wanted to. “Rook isn’t downstairs.”

“I’ll take the bus,” she shrugged and he grew infuriated. She could feel his toxic energy churning all around them in the foyer as he grabbed at his hair. The elevator finally arrived and she entered it, relieved that he didn’t follow her. Rey finally looked up at him and focused all of her emotion into her tone. ”Get back to work, Mr. Ren. You won’t have to worry about me being a distraction anymore.”

The last thing she remembered before the doors closed was the sound of Mr. Ren’s furious scream, and the vision of him slamming his fist into the wall, punching directly through the drywall of his foyer as her eyes blurred with tears.


	14. Impostor

In the days following their argument, Rey did not speak with Mr. Ren once. She did not call him in the evenings, and he made no effort to contact her in return. She worked the few events that CCC had scheduled her for and spent the rest of her time doing homework. As heartbroken as Rey felt over Mr. Ren’s dismissal of her, she had to remain strong, and threw herself into her studies for midterms. With her tests as the focal point of her attention, she put her design portfolio on the shelf for a while and reserved study rooms in the library instead of work rooms in the engineering department. For the rest of the week, Rey planned on practically living in the library as she stared down at her testing schedule. Four midterms in one week with the weekend feeling light-years away.

It was not until Sunday night that Mr. Ren decided to call her.

Rey froze when his name flashed on her phone, and she closed her eyes against the emotions that were all warring for her attention as she hesitated to pick it up. Pain, longing, fear, hope… she no longer knew what to expect from him which left her feeling anxious. His words of dismissal played in her head on loop, but the more she analyzed them, the more she realized that they were Snoke’s words, and not Mr. Ren’s. Ren himself had been the one to admit that he had chased his friends and family away in the past, and wanted to change for the better. His boss had been the one to plant ideas in his head, and made him believe their time together was a distraction from his work when it was really helping him become a more productive businessman. 

Rey knew that she couldn’t give up on him, just like she wouldn’t let him give up on Hux. She had to believe there was hope for Mr. Ren. That he still wanted to change and be a better person despite his boss’ influence. 

“Hello?” She answered hesitantly, wondering what version of the man was on the other end.

“Miss Jackson,” the voice sounded relieved, the greeting coming on a shaky exhale. 

“Good evening, Mr. Ren,” she kept her voice even, betraying no emotion. Professionalism was the only way to conduct herself around him now. “How may I help you?”

There was a long pause, where Rey was sure she could hear him breathing very deeply. He sounded distressed, and not like himself. “I-I have not heard from you in quite a while.”

Rey had to stifle the scoff that threatened to spill out of her at his hypocrisy. “It was not my intention to bother you, Mr. Ren,” she remarked, remembering his words to her. “Is there something you need?”

“Yes,” he urged. “Yes, Miss Jackson. You must allow me to apologize for my behavior on Thursday night.” His tone was rushed and emphatic as she closed her eyes against the memories of his angry words. “I could give you every excuse for my exhaustion and anger, but none of them can erase what I did and I regret my actions wholeheartedly.”

She nodded to herself in the quiet of her dorm room. Rey was glad that Rose was not home as she soaked in his apology. He regretted his actions, but not the things that were said between them. The pain still felt raw as she willed away tears.

“You should never have been exposed to such violence and I am ashamed you saw me act in such a way,” he continued when she didn’t say anything. When he spoke again, his voice was shaky and small. “I hope you can forgive me.”

Rey did not know what to say, but she knew that whatever conflict existed between them had to be resolved in some way or another, and soon. If he still meant to pay for her education, which he made clear was his only intention, then they had to get back to some kind of normal. She had tethered herself to him for the foreseeable future, so any and all issues must reach some kind of resolution, no matter what her feelings for him might be.

“I accept your apology,” she replied evenly, proud of herself when her voice did not shake. She didn’t know what else to say as an unsteady silence filled the gaps of their conversation. It had never felt so difficult or so awkward to talk to him, now that he had set a very firm boundary between them.

“Yes, well,” he sighed. “Thank you.” Another lengthy pause. “I will, um, see you Tuesday.”

“For what?” She asked, genuinely puzzled.

“For dinner with Hux and Phasma,” he urged, sounding surprised at her confusion.

“I didn’t think you wanted to continue with that,” she remarked, trying not to sound sarcastic. “It’s time you could be working.”

“Rey,” she cut him off, hating the way her heart betrayed her every time he used her first name. 

“Besides, I can’t this week. It’s midterms and I have to study. I’m meeting with a group on Tuesday night.” A long, labored sigh shuddered on the other end.

“Understandable, Miss Jackson. I wish you the best of luck on your exams. Please remember to inform me of your results.” If Mr. Ren wanted them to be professional, then that’s what they would be. Easy enough until Rey factored in all the lies and deceit they were still swimming in.

“I will, Mr. Ren. Good night.”

“Good night, Miss Jackson.” And as she hung up, Rey chose to ignore the sad sigh she had heard huffing on the other end.

The next day, midterm week was in full swing on campus as testing began. Most of her fellow co-eds looked like caffeinated zombies most of the time, and Rey was doing her best to power through all of her exams. She attended all of Han Solo’s lectures, sitting in the back and taking notes as the man spoke to packed crowds at every event. He was charismatic and energetic, and everything that his son was not. It was easy to see the reasons why they didn’t get along as Han used his bravado and magnetism to engage every crowd in tales from his career.

As much as Rey wanted to meet Commander Solo again and ask him all of her mounting questions, she felt guilty for trying to arrange a meeting with Mr. Ren’s parents behind his back. The entire issue was sensitive to him, she knew this, and while Mr. Ren was the ruthless sort who did whatever he wanted, Rey didn’t think she had it in her to be so cold-blooded.

On Thursday she turned in her portfolio outline during her lecture class, detailing the functions of her design in the off-chance that she actually created a working piece of technology. Right now the design was purely theoretical, and Rey had ambitious plans for her little idea as she listened to Director Krennic drone on about the highlights from the weekly reading.

It was not until Friday afternoon that she heard from Mr. Ren again. All week long, she had been anticipating his weekly demands for her free time, but he had never called her to arrange any events. She had to work that night, but kept her weekend free in the off-chance that he would need her again. Rey was happy that she did when she heard his latest request.

“I need you on Saturday and Sunday, Miss Jackson.” He didn’t even say hello, just started in on his normal demands. His voice sounded hoarse as he spoke, and even more shaky than it did on Sunday. He was probably working himself to the bone, but she refused to comment on it. Rey had to remember to keep herself at an arm’s length at all times from now on.

“Both days?” She asked, wondering what he needed her for. Rey also wanted to know if the man actually expected her to sleep over after everything he had put her through regarding the last time.

He was going to be rudely mistaken if that was his intention. She was never sleeping at his apartment again.

“Yes. There is much to do.” He didn’t go into any other details as she was kept firmly in the dark.

“I’m going to your father’s final lecture in the morning,” she explained, hating the tense silence that was now a constant presence during every phone call. “It will be over at one. Is that alright?” Instead of an argument, or a snarky remark, she heard him sigh softly.

“Yes, Miss Jackson. I will see you tomorrow.”

They said their goodbyes and Rey wondered what kind of events he had scheduled for them throughout the weekend. It sounded busy if he needed her for both days. All Rey had to do was remember that she was still trying to perform the duties of her job in a professional and pragmatic manner. She could not get distracted by the fancy clothes, or jewelry, or whatever role Mr. Ren forced her to play. It was the ultimate test in whether or not Rey could keep her personal life detached from her professional life. 

Maybe it was better that their relationship had devolved this way, she mused to herself. Rey was already learning so much about being an adult just from her complicated relationship with Mr. Ren. 

The next morning dawned bright and crisp as Rey took her morning run in the brisk October air. This was definitely her favorite time of year as she observed the sights of the changing leaves that blanketed the valleys north of campus. For a moment, she wondered what it would be like to see the changing leaves from Mr. Ren’s penthouse, the view stretching out for miles and miles of both city and wilderness. Then she remembered their argument and wondered if she would ever go to his apartment again.

Han Solo’s final lecture was taking place on a Saturday morning since so many students could not make time for the others during midterm week. Finn was one of those students, and was eager to see the lecture that Rey had already sat through four times. She didn’t mind, however, and was looking forward to the final presentation as she, Rose, and Finn grabbed tea and coffee before it began.

There were fewer people present than during the week. Most of the campus was exhausted from the stress of midterms and using the Saturday morning to sleep in. Rey and her friends found seats in a row about halfway back, and spotted Mr. Ren’s parents sitting in the front, chatting with students and staff. Rose and Finn had left Rey to chat with some other people as she sketched ideas for her design in her notebook alone. She was playing with the tag of her tea bag, twisting it around her finger when a dark, looming shadow lingered over her and blocked her light.

“May I sit here?” The deep, familiar voice said, and Rey slowly looked up in shock as she saw her benefactor standing over her, gazing down at her with soulful eyes.

At least, she was pretty sure it was her benefactor. The man before her was wearing black and white plaid over a familiar black t-shirt, with ripped black jeans and sneakers. The man before her also had his long black hair french braided back into a half-up half-down man bun.

But she couldn’t deny her eyes. The man before her was Mr. Ren.

And at the same time, the man before her was not Mr. Ren.

“Mr. Ren?” She breathed, taking in the relaxed body language as he balanced a black messenger bag on his shoulder. He looked like an overgrown graduate student as he shuffled his weight from foot to foot, waiting for her permission to sit down. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m an alumni, and a donor. I’m allowed to come to these things,” his eyes were soft as he gazed down at her. There was something about his tone, and the way he was speaking to her that was so different from his normal demeanor. He looked more relaxed than she had seen him in weeks.

“No, I mean, this is your father’s lecture. Why are you here?” He shrugged and looked down to where his parents were sitting. They had not yet noticed him.

“I wanted to know what the big deal was,” he scoffed lightly. “See if he’s still telling the same stories or if he’s changed it up over the years.” Rey had so many questions for him, she didn’t know where to begin. Didn’t he have work to do? Why would he come to his father’s lecture? She opened her mouth to ask but was interrupted when Rose and Finn approached her benefactor with tentative smiles on their knowing faces.

“Rey,” Rose asked, peeking up at the man who towered more than fifteen inches over her roommate's five foot frame. “Who is this?” Rose’s eyes were bright as Finn kept looking Mr. Ren up and down in a masculine effort to size him up.

“I’m Ben,” he introduced himself, balancing his bag on his shoulder and reaching for Rose’s hand. Ren was the picture of politeness and Rey could not believe that this was the same person she had spoken to last Thursday. The change she saw in him was unreal. “You must be Rose.”

“I am!” Rose grinned up at Rey’s benefactor with wide eyes. “You’re very big,” she commented.

“You’re very small,” he returned, causing Rey to smile in his presence for the first time in weeks.

“I’m Finn,” her friend made his introduction next, his expression critical. “You look like you need a hug, man.”

“I-oof!” Before Mr. Ren could protest, Finn gave her benefactor the tightest bro hug Rey had ever seen. The man looked terrified as he quickly thumped a fist on Finn’s back.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” Ren deadpanned, pushing away from Finn. “Rey has told me much about you.”

“If only we could say the same thing!” Rose scolded with her hands on her hips. “We’ve been waiting to meet her boyfriend for weeks!” Rey was awash in horror as she took in Ren’s reaction. She had never divulged the lies she had used as a cover in her personal life and wondered what Ren was thinking. He looked down at her, raising an eyebrow as his mouth lifted in a small grin.

“I’ve been really busy lately,” he apologized to her friends. “Hopefully now we can get the chance to know each other better.” She shook her head at him in confusion, wondering what he meant, but the lecture was about to begin. 

They took their seats with Ren at the end of their row, and Rey could not stop stealing glances at the man next to her. He looked like Mr. Ren, he sounded like Mr. Ren, but there was something so totally and completely different about him it was like meeting a different person. From the clothes to the conversation, it was like Kylo Ren had been erased completely. As much as she wanted to pay attention to the presentation, she kept glancing over at Mr. Ren and wondering what he was thinking as he sat completely absorbed by his father’s lecture. Not once did he take out his cell phone, or check an email, or take his eyes off of his father’s figure.

When the lecture was over, Ren was quiet as the lecture hall started to empty. Rose and Finn were going to try to find a ride to the mall and pick out Halloween costumes for the approaching holiday. Rey said her goodbyes as Finn approached her benefactor.

“Frat party at the Delta Tau house tonight, in order to celebrate the end of midterms. You in?” Ren tilted his head.

“Is the Tau house still on the corner of Elm and Mayfield?”

“You know it, bro.”

“We’ll see.” The fact that Mr. Ren even knew where to find the Sigma Delta Tau house was a surprise enough, let alone his willingness to go there.

“Hit us up later,” Finn reached out to fist bump her benefactor, then pulled Rey into a quick hug. Her friends left her in the large lecture hall as she turned to face the imposter that was currently possessing Mr. Ren.

“Alright, now what the hell is going on?” She took in his style once more, her eyes lingering on the braids in his hair. Mr. Ren and braids? It did not compute in her mathematical mind. 

“I beg your pardon?”

“Why aren’t you working?” She accused, feeling a slight satisfaction as his face crumpled in a mighty wince. “Why are you dressed like some Brooklyn hipster? I thought you said we had things to do.”

“I am allowed to dress casually,” he fidgeted, avoiding her other question. “Now come, we have much to do today.” He turned on his heel, walking away from her, but it was the direction he was walking in that gave her pause.

He was heading directly towards his parents.

Rey quickly followed after him, standing to the side as he approached his parents at the dais. It was his father that noticed him first. Han looked like he was seeing a ghost as he whacked his wife on the arm.

“What, Han?” She gasped when she noticed him. “Ben!”

“Hello Mother,” he pulled Leia in for a hug and looked up at Han. “Father.”

“Nice hair, kid.” Han pointed toward the braids.

Ren didn’t say anything, just motioned towards an overwhelmed Rey. “You remember Rey?” She stepped forward and greeted them with a shaky smile, still unable to keep up with Mr. Ren’s myriad changes.

“Hello Han,” she greeted. “Leia.”

“Rey and I were wondering if you were free this evening for dinner,” Ren said, shocking Rey into silence once more. “She has many questions for father and I have the time.”

Leia looked like she was seconds away from bursting into tears. “Of course!” She gushed, grabbing her son’s hands tightly. “How about five o’clock? We can order Italian from your favorite place!”

“Sounds wonderful, Mom,” he replied fondly, dropping the formalities and sounding like a normal son for once. “We will see you then.”

“We’ll be waiting with bells on,” was Han’s sardonic response, which Ren chose to ignore. It seemed to be his preferred way of handling being in his father’s presence. Han turned to Rey. “Bring your notes and your questions, kiddo. I’ll tell you everything you need to know.”

“Thank you, Commander Solo.” They said their goodbyes and Rey looked up at her benefactor, filled to the brim with questions as they left to begin their day of events. She had waited long enough for her answers, and she planted her heels into the pavement as soon as they walked a fair distance away from the lecture hall.

“Ren!” She called after him, crossing her arms as he froze in place. He turned around slowly to face her. “Get over here and talk to me.” She refused to move another inch until he finally acquiesced to her demands and gave her some answers. 

They were standing in an empty courtyard on the pavillion in front of the Administration building, the same place where they had met all those weeks ago. It was empty now, on a Saturday afternoon, and she couldn’t help but compare the suited, savage man she had met in the elevator to the man standing before her in plaid and a man bun.

How were they both the same person?

“What’s wrong?” He looked at her with questions of his own, as if she were the one acting out of character.

“What’s wrong?” She repeated, looking him up and down once more and hating how her heart reacted to him. He looked so attractive, so handsome and young and carefree as her gut twisted in yearning. “What is going on, Ren? Why are you here? What are you wearing? What are we doing this weekend?” She could go on and on, but those questions seemed the most important. 

Ren looked away from her, clenching his fists and jaw in the only normal act he’d done since his arrival. His every muscle seemed tense as he answered her. “This was a bad week, Miss Jackson,” he started, his voice rumbling on the cool October wind. 

“What happened?” He glanced up at her with regret in his eyes.

“I listened to Snoke,” he confessed softly. “I lost myself again.”

Rey hated the way her heart stuttered at his words. “Let me guess,” she tried to remain immune to his pleading eyes. “You flipped out on everyone at work.”

He winced. “It was bad. Hux won’t even look at me right now.” As much as she tried to harden her heart to him, she couldn’t deny the sympathy she still felt for Ren. It was battering down all of her well-placed defenses as he continued his assault. “And I’ve been thinking a lot about our argument,” he looked away from her. “About what I said that night.”

“Ren,” the last thing she wanted to do was relive that night, but he cut her off

“I’ve taken a leave of absence, Rey,” he took a step closer to her and she was trying her best not to let the proximity affect her. It wasn’t working. “I spoke to HR and I’m using some of the sick time I’ve accumulated over the years. Everyone at the branch thinks it’s for the best.”

She could have been knocked over with a feather, she was so shocked. 

“How long?” 

“A week,” he explained. “Snoke wants me back at work on Monday the 29th.”

“What did he say about it?” She wondered, knowing how valuable Ren was to the company. The man had never taken off a day in his life and now he was out of work for nine days in a row. His boss was probably furious.

“He wasn’t happy,” he shook his head. “He threatened to demote me. Fire me. He tried to say that I wasn’t fit for the expectations of the job.” Ren looked up at Rey with more determination than she had ever seen in him. “Then I remembered what you said.”

“Said about what?”

“Mental health days,” his smile was rueful. “Taking care of myself so I can be a better person.” He rubbed the back of his neck bashfully, taking another step closer to her. His voice was low and she was entranced by eyes that were heartbreakingly familiar to her as emotion swirled deep within them.

“Snoke doesn’t know you helped me arrange the meeting with my mother. He doesn’t know that you’ve been helping me become a better person. When I told him about you, he saw you as a weakness, when I know I’ve never been stronger.” He took a deep breath. ”I told him that my personal life was none of his business from now on. Deep down Snoke knows he can’t fire me, I’m the one he’s been grooming to take over the company. No one knows the business like I do, and Snoke understands that. He didn’t have any other choice but to let me take the week off.”

Rey nodded up at him, proud that he was able to stand up to his boss and wondering what it meant for their relationship. “I’m happy for you, Mr. Ren.”

“As for your second question,” he sighed deeply. “I have not been acting in your best interests. As my protegee, it is my job to arrange opportunities for you to succeed, and I have been lackluster in my efforts. That’s why I came to the lecture, so you can have your opportunity to meet with my father and have your questions answered.”

Rey didn’t know what to say. Mr. Ren was going out of his way to arrange dinner with his parents, even though he could barely hold a conversation with his father.

And he was doing it all for her. As her benefactor, of course. Strictly professional.

“What about the clothes?” She asked, appreciating his fabulous hair.

“I like plaid,” he commented, fidgeting awkwardly. “I am not used to dressing so informally.”

She couldn’t help but smile. “And the braids?”

“My mother taught me how to braid,” he sniffed haughtily. “It keeps the hair out of my eyes.”

“So what about these events this weekend?” She returned to the issue at hand. “Where are we going?”

“Nowhere, Miss Jackson,” he sighed heavily. “That’s the point.”

“I don’t follow.”

“You once asked me if I knew what fun was,” he shoved his hands in his pockets. “It turns out I’m not really sure.”

“Huh?”

“I want you to show me what people do for fun,” he ordered. “When they have _free time_.” He said the words like they were a foreign language.

Realization began to dawn on her as a mischievous smile pulled up her lips. She rubbed her hands together, her brain already scheming. “We’re gonna have fun this weekend, Mr. Ren.”

“I am genuinely scared of you right now.”

“There’s so much we can do!” The possibilities were endless. Mr. Ren had a car, and money, and time, so they could do anything underneath the vast spectrum of fun. “We could go bowling! We could go to the movies!”

“I do not want to sit in the dark all day and I refuse to wear communal footwear.”

Ren could be as sour as he wanted to be, but Rey refused to allow it to get to her. Mr. Ren was here with her, he had all the free time in the world at his fingertips, and was looking at Rey as if she held the key to his freedom. It gave her more hope than ever that things could be normal between them once more.

“Are you going to let me do my job or not?” She planted her hands on her hips, feeling some of that easy energy returning to their rapport. It was a feeling she had missed more than anything as he gazed down at her with a soft smile. 

“By all means, Miss Jackson,” he lifted his arm toward the parking lot, where his car was parked and waiting. “Let’s go have some fun.”


	15. Fun and Games

“I’m hungry,” was Mr. Ren’s imperious claim when they left the parking lot of campus.

“Me too,” Rey said, remembering the sole croissant she had munched on with her tea before the lecture. “Where do you want to go?”

He was thoughtful for a moment, rolling the top of his convertible back as she was hit by the bright October sun. The wind whipped through their hair and she couldn’t take her eyes off of his relaxed look.

“I remember a place not too far from campus,” he grinned as he threw on a pair of designer sunglasses. “Hux and I used to stumble there on the way home from nights in town. They had the best burritos.”

“Then let’s go,” she grinned, relaxing back into the leather seats as she enjoyed the short ride to a shack on the side of the road called the Cantina. It looked like a stiff wind could topple it over as Mr. Ren pulled over into a dirt lot, parking under the shade of a yellow-leaved tree.

“Is it even open?” She asked, her lip curled up in distaste. “It looks condemned.”

“Just you wait,” he left his engine on, getting out of the car and reaching for his wallet. “Which do you prefer? Chicken or beef?”

“Um, chicken,” she replied, watching him approach the shanty. Her jaw dropped open when the single glass window slid open, revealing an incredibly old man with an incredibly large gut. A transaction took place and Mr. Ren returned with a plastic bag filled with food.

The first time she had met him he had taken her to dine at one of the most popular restaurants in all of Corellia. Today he brought her to a shack on the side of the road.

“Here you go,” he said, passing her napkins, a foil-wrapped burrito, and a green can of ginger ale. He had an identical setup for himself as she unwrapped her food and took a bite.

It was better than anything she had eaten in any restaurant. 

“This is great,” she mumbled between bites, trying not to spill any of the messy burrito on the interior of his car. He was trying to do the same, but it was quite the odd experience watching Mr. Ren eat something so messy. He was always the pinnacle of decorum, but today there was beef chili dripping down his chin.

“You have something,” she motioned to the messy spot on his chin. “Right there.” 

He tried to wipe it away, but missed. “Did I get it?”

“No,” she shook her head, reaching over before she could stop herself. As strong as she tried to be, sometimes it felt like Mr. Ren was a magnet, always pulling Rey in closer and closer. She wiped his chin with her own napkin, feeling the slight stubble on his chin. He was probably taking a break from shaving for the week of his vacation.

There was a small blush on his cheek as he ducked his head and took a sip of his own can of ginger ale, his face thoughtful. “This is pretty good,” he mumbled, looking down at the can. “Sweet, but good.”

“I agree,” she munched happily on her food, enjoying the quietness of the country road. “What do you want to do next?” She asked, noticing the time. They had a little more than three hours before dinner, and she had to swing back to campus beforehand to get her notes and prototype.

“I’m not sure,” he frowned, finishing off the giant burrito in a few more messy bites. She was almost done, spending more time watching Mr. Ren eat than actually eating her own. “What do you and your friends do for fun?”

Rey thought about it for a moment, thinking about her fellow poor college friends and their lack of money, car, and resources. Besides watching Netflix and attending the occasional frat party, there was very little they engaged in that wasn’t a free event on campus. And while Corellia College did have their fair share of events and shows, she knew that none of them would fit into the three hour time frame they had ahead of them.

But she had some kind of idea what people did for fun in this part of New York. She had been a student here for two whole years, and fall was the best time to do fun things outdoors.

“Well, it’s October. There’s always things to do around here for fun.” She tapped at her chin. “We could go to a haunted house!”

“I hate Halloween,” he grumbled. “So no.”

“What about a hayride?” She continued. “Apple picking? Farmer’s Market? Antique Stores?”

“Yes,” he collected all the garbage to throw away. “That one.”

“Which one?” He left the car to toss away the garbage, rubbing his hands as he returned.

“Apple picking,” he looked down at her. “I like apples.”

She smiled softly. “I like apples too.” He took out his cell phone, looking up a local orchard. There was one about 20 minutes northeast of town.

“Let’s go,” he said, pulling out of the dirt road and heading north to their next destination.

The even roads began to lift and drop into the hilly country lanes of northern Westchester county. Rey was enjoying the view of the vibrant leaves from the passenger seat of Mr. Ren’s convertible. Not a word was spoken between them, but the silence was soft and serene as she closed her eyes against the bright fall sun, sinking into the heated seats that chased away the chill of the fall breeze.

They arrived at a small, family-owned orchard, nestled behind a corn farm and a large paint-chipped barn. Horses grazed around a large fenced area on the opposite side of the road. They parked on the grass and Ren raised the convertible top as Rey zipped up her jacket. She had never been apple picking before, and followed Mr. Ren as he approached a small booth. He paid for a large bag to carry the apples and put down a deposit for a long stick with a small basket at the end.

“It’s a bit late in the season,” the attendant remarked kindly. “You’ll have to go to the bottom of the hill to find most of our remaining stock. The stick should help you pick the ones that are too high up on the tree.”

Mr. Ren looked down at her, puffing his chest out and standing to his tallest height. “I doubt that will be a problem.” She rolled her eyes at him.

“Let’s go,” she exhaled on a laugh, marching ahead of him and finding the path through the field that would lead them to the apple trees. They found that most of the stock had been cleared for the season, the ground littered with half-eaten and rotting apples. The air smelled sickly-sweet as they reached the small rows of trees at the bottom of the hill where there were a few Macoun and Macintosh apples left to be picked.

“These apples are huge!” Rey remarked, reaching up on her tiptoes to grab an enormous apple from a high branch. She brought it over to Mr. Ren and plopped it in the bag, returning to the tree for more. There were so few left that she had to use the stick to help her.

“Up there,” he pointed at a bunch of huge apples, all the way at the very top of a tall tree. Even from her spot on the ground, she could tell the fruit was enormous. “Let me see if I can get them with the stick.” She passed it over to him and was shocked to see that even with his immense height, he still couldn’t reach the apples. 

“Well if you can’t use your height to get us some of those mega-apples, then what good are you?” She teased, enjoying the way his shirt was riding up as he tried to reach for the apples. Even if their relationship was meant to be professional, she could still enjoy the view. 

“Come here,” Ren grumbled, frustrated that he had failed at what he perceived to be an important task. “I want those apples.” He passed her the stick and bent down on his knee, cupping his hands together with interlocked fingers. “I’ll give you a boost.”

“Don’t you dare drop me,” she said hesitantly, stepping forward and planting her left hand on his shoulders as her heart thumped in anticipation. The stick was in her right hand, ready to be wielded against their enemy, the tall tree.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he replied in all seriousness, urging her forward. “On the count of three. One.” She placed her foot in his hands. “Two.” She clenched all of her muscles, gripping Ren’s shoulder tight. “Three.”

Rey was up in the air, Mr. Ren propelling her as he held onto her feet and ankles as if she were a cheerleader. She used her core for balance while reaching up and swiping at the apples with the stick. The largest one fell in the basket with a plop, just as she started to fall backwards. Her heart was in her throat as the sensation of falling jarred her senses. She held onto the stick, trying not to drop her prize as she closed her eyes and waited for impact.

Rey landed in the arms of Mr. Ren, pulled tightly against his chest as she successfully kept the apple in its place. She looked up at him in shock as he held her, tightening his grip as she pulled the apple from the basket.

“I got it,” she smiled hesitantly, dropping the stick to bring her arms around Mr. Ren’s neck for support. 

“So you did,” his voice was low as he gazed down at her, and she felt as small as a child in his broad embrace. “Good job.”

He made no move to put her down as she began to play with the hair trailing down his neck, her fingertips sliding through the silky strands. “That was fun,” she whispered. “Can we do it again?” 

“Sure,” he said, but it still took him another few moments to put her down. 

They did it twice more, and Rey dropped the third apple even in her attempts to balance it in the basket. Mr. Ren picked it up off of the floor and brushed it off on his plaid overshirt, taking a huge bite of it and passing it to Rey. “Try it, it’s delicious.” She took a bite on the same flesh he had, enjoying the tart crispness of the fruit. She passed it back to him and they shared it while their focus returned to the more accessible apples on the branches.

They strolled around the orchard together for a while longer, enjoying the weather and the country view around them. Rey spent a while appreciating the horses in their pen, petting and cooing at them while Mr. Ren stood and watched. He tossed the horse their apple core and smiled when the animal neighed in appreciation. 

The farm had a small market where they sold other types of produce, apples in bushels, and homemade goods. Rey saw a homemade apple pie with a cross-hatch crust and wanted to bring it over to the Solo residence for dessert. 

She picked it up but put it back down again, muttering to herself. “I left my wallet in the car.”

“For what?” Ren’s head snapped up from the organic kale and joined her by the baked goods.

“This pie,” she shrugged. “I wanted to get it for your parents.”

He shook his head at her. “I’ll take care of it.”

Rey shook her head as he reached for it. “You paid for everything today and-.” He cut her off.

“And I will pay for everything as long as we’re together so just deal with it and give me the pie.” He looked angry as he grabbed the dessert and stormed off towards the cashier in a huff.

Rey followed after him as he walked ahead to his car, starting the engine and dropping the convertible top once more. He placed the pie and the bag of apples in the backseat on the floor, so nothing could topple over. He was quiet when she entered, looking up at him as he stared down at the steering wheel and sighed.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized, not wanting to ruin their fun day. “I didn’t mean to make you mad.”

“I’m not mad, Miss Jackson,” he shook his head slowly. “I just wish you would understand.”

Now she was the one shaking her head. “Understand what?”

“I,” he hesitated, closing his eyes and exhaling deeply. “I like being the one to pay for your things. Your school, your clothes. Apple picking and pies. I like taking care of you.”

Rey didn’t know how to respond to his confession as he continued. “I like the way you look at me when I’ve done something for you. It makes me feel good, like I’ve actually accomplished something important.” He sighed deeply. “It’s better than the way you look at me when you call me a monster.” For a moment she felt ashamed of all the times she had called him a monster, even if his behavior had been rough.

“You know,” she cleared her throat as he finally looked over at her, his gaze shy and guarded. “You know how much it means to me, right?” Her fingers twisted together in her lap. “You know that no one has ever taken care of me before in my life, right?”

“I know,” he nodded. “I can feel it.”

“I hope so,” she shook her head, lost in her own insecurities about their arrangement. “Sometimes I wonder if there’s anything I could possibly ever do to repay you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“No,” he said quickly, his lips pursed in a firm line. “Never think that way. Everything I give to you I give freely. I want to pay for your things. I want to take care of you. Please just allow me to do so from now on.”

“It’s hard for me,” she admitted softly. “To just allow you to do that. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

“It’s not taking advantage if I want you to do it,” he said, buckling his seatbelt. “Whether it's a ten dollar pie or a ten thousand dollar Birkin bag, I want you to just tell me about it and know that I’ll buy it for you.”

“If you buy me a ten thousand dollar handbag I will throw it into the Hudson river,” she threatened playfully as she buckled in. “Don’t you dare.”

“Whatever you say, Miss Jackson.” 

They made their way back towards Corellia, stopping by her dorm room in order to pick up her notes and her prototype. Rey was nervous as he walked behind her up the stairs to her room on the second floor. She had never had a guy in her room before, besides Finn and Poe, and Mr. Ren was no ordinary guy. They approached room 227 and Rey hoped that Rose had picked up all of her underwear off of the floor as she slid the key card into the lock.

Rose wasn’t home, and Mr. Ren had to duck his head to fit in the entrance of the small dorm room. “I remember these rooms being bigger,” he grumbled, knocking his forehead on the decorative lamp that Rose had hung in the entryway.

“No, you’re just enormous,” she laughed at his pronounced frown as he took in her section of the 10x10 foot room. While Rose’s section was decorated with posters and pictures of Rose’s friends from high school, Rey’s side of the room had nothing hanging on the walls. The bedspread was a soft gray color she had picked up at Target, and there were no pictures or artifacts from her youth. 

It’s not like she had anything to hang up anyway.

Rey placed her prototype in her duffel bag and collected her notes in her backpack. “Let’s go.” Mr. Ren took one more glance at the spartan space and followed her out of the room, very quiet and pensive as they returned to his car.

“Next stop, my parents.” He did not sound thrilled at the idea. “They live up in Chappequa, so it’ll take a while.”

They drove north for the second time that day, making their way into Putnam county where large palatial houses were hidden behind huge trees and decorative landscaping. Rey could not believe her eyes at the sizes of the homes in the area as they drove down a private road with no outlet. The Solo residence came to view after a long drive down a winding lane.

It was a Victorian style manor, nestled on a quiet piece of land with absolutely no neighbors in sight. It had to be at least three floors with an attic, and Rey could not even begin to count the windows as they pulled around to the front of the house. Leia was sitting out in the front waiting for them while reading a book, her face erupting in a beaming grin. 

“Han, they’re here!” Leia walked down the porch to greet them while Rey held onto the pie. Mr. Ren was carrying the backpack and duffel bag for her as they entered the house.

“So,” Han deadpanned from the foyer, talking directly to his son. “You remember where we live.”

“Nice to see you, too.”

“You ready for the 20 questions, kiddo?” Han smiled down at Rey and she grinned.

“Try 200 questions.”

“Have fun with that,” Mr. Ren drawled. “Mother, may I talk to you in the kitchen?”

“Of course, Ben, what’s the matter?” Mr. Ren placed a hand on his mother’s shoulder and lead her away from Han and Rey.

“It’s just something I need to ask you,” he said vaguely as Rey felt unsettled for a moment. She wondered what he meant to ask her as she picked up her bags and followed Han into the living room, trying not to let her jaw drop as she took in the gorgeous interior of the home. It looked like a living piece of history as she took in the sofa and chaise, and the numerous bookshelves that lined the walls.

“So shoot, kiddo. I’ve been dying to know more about you and all these questions you have for me.” His eyes crinkled as he smiled down at her. “Whaddya got there?”

“Well,” she reached into her bag for all of her notes. “I’m interested in working at NASA, sir. I want to help develop technology that will get us to Mars.”

“Excellent,” he nodded. “We’re always looking for young blood with new ideas.”

“This is the plan that I have for my design,” she said passing over her notes as he raised an eyebrow, seemingly impressed with her meticulous planning. “I want to make going to Mars as easy as driving to the corner store. It’s not an engine, per se, but something that can attach to the engine and help build mass acceleration for fast and easy interspace travel.”

She took a deep breath as Han continued to read her notes. “I’m calling it the hyperdrive.”

Han and her discussed the science behind her design at length, and while Rey wasn’t as versed in astrophysics as Han was, she was able to follow a lot of what he was saying. He gave her ideas on the design and the science behind her concept and she absorbed everything, taking down the names of the books he recommended for her to read.

“Some of this is heavy stuff, kiddo. Like, doctoral degree-level theory. I hope you’re up to the task.”

“Well at this point it’s all theoretical,” Rey shrugged. “But even if I make even the slightest breakthrough, it’ll be worth it.” She knew she was just an engineering student who loved math and outer space, but this was her idea and she was going to follow it through to the best of her ability. It’s not like she was going to create brand new astro tech in her dorm room, but she had ambitious dreams for her future. 

“What do you guys want from La Cucina?” Leia entered the room with a menu, and Mr. Ren was nowhere in sight. Was he still talking to his mother? For a moment she wondered if they were talking about their meeting with Snoke, even though he was supposed to be taking a vacation from work. It made her feel uneasy that he was using this free time to help his horrible boss.

She gave Leia her order for Chicken Parmigiana, and she and Han returned to their discussion. After about a minute, she asked Han where to find the bathroom. He pointed to a long hallway and Rey excused herself, walking past the bathroom and heading for the kitchen, just to see what they were talking about. Imagine her surprise when she heard her name being spoken instead of Snoke’s.

“Rey is a resilient young woman, Ben. I read her file, so I know it’s true. I think you need to trust her.”

“I have no idea what I’m doing,” he sounded torn, his voice a rumble from behind the wall. “And I never know what she’s thinking.”

“How can you say that?” Leia asked. “She looks at you like you hung the moon in the sky.”

“It’s complicated,” he grumbled. “She’s so strong and beautiful and I feel like such a fool around her, all the time.” Rey’s heart was in her throat, beating at triple speed. “And the way she looks at me? Like I’m either God or the Devil himself.” He let out a shuddering sigh as she covered her mouth, stunned at his words.

“She holds you accountable for your actions,” Leia mused. “It’s about damn time.”

“What do I do?” He begged his mother. “How do I tell her?” 

Tell her? Tell her what?!

“You trust that she cares about you as much as you care about her.” Leia spoke with the wisdom of the ages. “And you have hope that everything will be alright.”

Rey tiptoed backwards, still covering her mouth as she closed her eyes against their words. What had she just overheard? What did Mr. Ren have to tell her? Why wouldn’t her heart stop pounding its way out of her body?

She actually went into the bathroom this time, her hands shaking as she shut the door as quietly as possible. She locked the door and slid her back against it, landing on the floor with a small plop as her mind reviewed the revelations she had just been witness to.

Mr. Ren cared about her. He thought she was beautiful. There was something he needed to tell her, but was too afraid to do it. It was too much for her to handle as her heart continued it’s assault against her chest cavity. It felt like it would burst right through her chest. How could he say all those things about her when a week ago he was forcing their relationship back into the platonic zone? Rey couldn’t understand, and hated that she felt so helpless.

“Rey?” A light knock thudded behind her as Ren’s voice bled through the walls. “Is everything okay?”

“I’m fine,” she called from her spot on the floor, too afraid to face him after hearing his confession. “I’ll be right there.” 

“The food should be here shortly.” She heard his footsteps as he walked away, leaving her on the bathroom floor as she wondered what to do next. How could she go out there and pretend to be normal after what she’d heard? 

But then she remembered something else he had said. Mr. Ren had called her strong. Rey knew she had to continue to be strong if she was ever going to face Mr. Ren again. She steeled herself against her fluttering emotions and took a deep breath before picking herself up off of the floor and facing the Solo family again. Rey gathered her notes in the living room, then joined the family in the dining room.

The table was set for four as Leia started passing around the food. She was sitting next to Mr. Ren, whose knee was already bouncing wildly under the seat as he tried not to glare across the table at his father. Rey was afraid to touch him or console him since hearing his confession, not knowing if he wanted her to do it, or if it crossed the boundaries of professionalism. Why was everything with Mr. Ren so damn complicated?

“So, your girlfriend is kind of a genius, Ben,” Han tried to start a conversation with his son while Mr. Ren stiffened in his seat. Rey ducked her head away, feeling modest under his praise. “I read her notes and she has some really interesting ideas.”

Mr. Ren coughed lightly in-between bites of his pasta. “Rey is an incredibly intelligent young woman. Her potential in her field is limitless.” Rey looked up at her benefactor with pride beaming out of every pore. Leia, on the other hand, kept volleying her gaze between her husband and her son as if either one were holding the detonator to a bomb.

“I think I might want to recommend her to Lando,” Han twirled some spaghetti on his fork. “For the summer internship.” Leia looked more tense than ever as her eyes widened.

Mr. Ren clenched his fists as his jaw started ticking, and Rey was waiting for the moment he inevitably exploded and ruined the quiet meal. But the explosion never came as he took a deep exhale and closed his eyes. Rey was missing something important about this conversation, but she couldn’t tell what it was as Mr. Ren looked slightly defeated before responding.

“She would be perfect for it,” he looked down at her with an ancient pain in her eyes, and she wished she understood why he was staring at her with such longing and sadness. “I think it’s a good idea.”

After that, Mr. Ren said very little throughout the meal. Han engaged Rey in conversations about Mars and future colonies, and she shared her dream to leave Earth and find a way to get to the big red planet herself. Mr. Ren kept giving her odd glances throughout the meal, and every time she met his eyes she couldn’t help but remember his quiet confessions from the kitchen. She had to clench her own fists under the table multiple times throughout the evening in order to stop herself from touching him, and quelling his shaking knees.

By the time dinner and dessert was over, it was very late and the sun had been set for a long time. Rey and Leia spent the majority of the evening engaged in light conversation while Han and Ben gruffly ignored one another. She kept noticing the men exchanging looks with one another, as if they wanted to speak but didn’t know how to start. She wished there was some way to bridge the gap between father and son, but she didn’t know the family well enough to even know where to begin.

Leia gave her the tightest, most maternal hug of Rey’s life as they stood on the porch and waited for Mr. Ren. The woman muttered a soft “Thank you” in Rey’s ear and she pulled away from the older woman, looking puzzled.

“What for?”

“For bringing my boy home to me,” there were tears in her eyes as she nodded. “For reminding me to never give up on hope.” Rey didn’t know what to say as Mr. Ren joined them on the porch. Han stood in the doorway, waving casually as they said their goodbyes. She and Mr. Ren entered the car and he drove slowly down the darkened country lanes as they made their way back to Corellia.

Rey yawned deeply, even though it was barely nine o’clock. “So what do you want to do tomorrow?” She asked, needing to fill up the space between them. They had hardly spoken the entire evening and she still felt jittery from eavesdropping on him.

He let out a short huff of laughter. “Tomorrow? Miss Jackson, we haven’t yet finished with today.”

“What do you mean?” Rey asked. 

“I believe we are expected somewhere this evening,” he smirked, looking down at her. It took her about five seconds to figure out what he was talking about.

“You can’t be serious,” she deadpanned, and the smirk became a full-blown grin.

“I am,” he looked down at her with his usual arrogance. “It’s the height of rudeness to turn down an invitation, Miss Jackson. Especially one from a close friend like Finn.”

“I can’t believe you want to go to a frat party!”

“I told your friends I would get to know them better, this is the perfect opportunity.”

“You know it’s just going to be keg stands and stoners, right?” Rey could have never pictured Ren at a frat party, even in her wildest of fantasies.

“I did go to college, Miss Jackson. I remember the nightlife quite well,” his smile was wolfish as he merged onto the parkway. “Besides, it’s been years since I did a keg stand.”

Rey’s jaw dropped at this influx of information as they made their way back to Corellia. Every time she thought Mr. Ren couldn’t shock her more, he threw another curveball at her that made her doubt everything she ever believed about her benefactor. Suits and plaid. Etiquette and frat parties. She had thought of him as a walking oxymoron before, but now his changes in behavior were giving her whiplash.

Ren parked the car a few blocks away, so none of the college kids tried to do anything stupid to his BMW. They walked up to the frat party quietly, and the first thing she saw was Poe, handing out the cups for five bucks each in order to have access to the keg.

Poe spotted Rey and smiled, but then noticed Ren as it quickly melted into a frown. They walked up to Poe and Ren reached into his wallet while Poe crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Hey Poe,” Rey greeted her friend, who did not look very friendly. “This is Ben.”

She looked up at her benefactor and he was also staring down Poe in some kind of masculine show of dominance. She rolled her eyes at their antics and reached for two cups. “How much?”

“For you it’s free, Sunshine,” Poe said, still staring at Ren. “For him it’s fifty.”

“Come on,” Rey urged, “I know for a fact you always charge five a cup.”

“Not when the guest looks like he’s an undercover cop.” His eyes narrowed. “How old are you, bro?”

“Old enough, bro,” Ren spat with a face filled with disgust. “Here.” Ren threw a fifty dollar bill at Poe and her friend caught it, wide-eyed. “And I’m not a cop. I’m a business major.”

Ren pushed past Poe as her friend glared at his retreating back. Rey frowned at Poe while her benefactor approached the keg, pumping it furiously. “That wasn’t very nice,” Rey scolded. “Ben is trying to get to know you guys better.”

“Is that the guy you were talking about?” Poe turned on her, accusations in his eyes. “When you asked me how to tell if a guy was too old for you?”

“Yes,” she frowned, remembering the rule Poe had taught her.

“And what did the math say?” She hated the way she cringed at his question.

“That’s none of your business,” she sniffed.

“Stick with the rule, Sunshine,” Poe said, turning back to the line of people waiting for their red cups. “It’s for the best.”

With a shake of her head, Rey left Poe and the line of people outside as she went around the bag to the keg and joined Mr. Ren. Both cups were filled with beer, and she was stunned when he passed her a cup. Normally he never allowed her to drink alcohol, since she was not yet twenty-one.

“It’s just one night,” he reasoned as she took a sip of the bitter brew. “Besides, you’re legal in the UK.”

“Cheers,” they knocked their red solo cups together with a small smile.

It took a while for them to find Rose and Finn in the crush of people both inside and outside of the house. Despite the chill of the cool October night, people were everywhere having fun and enjoying themselves after a long week of midterms. People were smoking weed and passing around joints and vape pens while she and Mr. Ren abstained, watching everyone around them get wasted. She only had a few sips of her beer, not really liking the taste of it. Mr. Ren, on the other hand, was imbibing more alcohol than she thought was necessary. He was already on beer number three when they finally found Finn.

“Bro!” Finn came up to Ren and hugged him again, her benefactor frozen once more in her friend’s embrace.

“What’s up?” Was Ren’s slightly slurred greeting. She had seen him polish off a glass of wine or two at dinner, but at the moment Mr. Ren was obviously drinking to get drunk, and he was almost there as he stumbled out of Finn’s hug.

“Keg stand contest in fifteen,” Finn commented. “Poe holds the record at seventeen seconds. Are you in?”

Rey didn’t like the unfocused look of Mr. Ren’s eyes as he nodded. “Count me in.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Ben,” she tugged on his sleeve and he looked down at her with wide eyes.

“I like it when you call me Ben,” he confessed, biting his lip as he looked down at her. Finn tilted his head in confusion.

“What else would she call you?” His expression became instantly flirtatious as he wiggled his eyebrows. “Unless she calls you Daddy!”

“Finn!” Rey scolded, completely scandalized as Finn and Ren shared a high five over Rey’s head. It felt like Rey was living in a different universe as they laughed together. Rose bounced over with her own drink, red-cheeked and happy as she stood with her group of friends. Rey seemed to be the most sober person there as Poe started preparing the second keg for the contest.

Rey and Rose watched in amusement as the guys, and some girls, tried their best to drink as much as they could upside down. People were holding them up in handstands while another fit the nozzle in their mouths and forced them to drink. Rey could not understand why Americans were so weird.

Poe was currently in the lead, breaking his own record at 21 seconds. Rey thought it looked like Poe was drowning in alcohol, but he wore his effort like a badge of honor.

“What about you, Sasquatch?” Poe asked, pointing at Mr. Ren and leveling a challenge at him. Rey had a bad feeling about what was about to happen as Ren killed off his beer and crumpled the red solo cup in a single fist. She had lost count of how many he had imbibed. 

“Out of my way,” Ren stormed forward, grabbing the nozzle out of Poe’s hand and passing it over to Finn. “You got this?”

“I got this,” Finn agreed, ready for Mr. Ren to begin. Two other frat guys walked up to help Mr. Ren into a handstand, but he brushed them off.

“I don’t need you,” he slurred, and Rey watched as he pushed himself into a handstand over the keg, balancing his giant frame as the entire crowd started to cheer. Finn shoved the nozzle into his mouth and Mr. Ren began to drink.

And drink.

And drink.

And drink.

It was Rose who began the cheer. “Ben! Ben! Ben! Ben!” and Rey quickly followed suit, pumping her fist in the air as the entire crowd chanted her benefactor’s name. When Ren shattered Poe’s record with a whopping thirty two seconds of upside-down beer drinking, it felt like the ground shook as Mr. Ren dropped from his handstand and landed on his feet. He stood up and arched his braided head back, spitting the remaining beer out of his mouth in a shower of alcohol that caused the crowd to cheer even more. He lifted his hands in the air, his face split in a beaming grin as he turned to Rey.

And promptly fell over into a crumpled drunk mess.

“Ben!” Rey screamed, running over to his prone form as people continued to cheer for him. She was more worried about having Mr. Ren’s stomach pumped than him breaking some stupid drinking record. “Ben, are you okay?” She started to panic when Ben didn’t respond, even though he looked up at her with fuzzy, unfocused eyes.

“Let’s get him up,” Finn came over to help Ben, but even with both their strength, they could not budge him from the floor. “Rey, your boyfriend is built like a brick shithouse.”

“Poe, help us!” Poe rolled his eyes, more than a little drunk himself, but asked some of his frat brothers to help get Ben off of the floor. Ben was able to hold himself up, but leaned heavily on her and the other guys who were helping him.

“Bring him to my room,” Finn helped them navigate through the crowded frat house and into the upper levels, where the individual bedrooms were locked so no one could steal anything or have sex on anyone’s beds. “If anything I can crash in your room on campus with Rose.”

“Thanks, Finn,” she breathed, feeling a little better as Ben began to groan softly. He was walking slowly, but steadily, and plopped himself on the bed with a loud moan. “I’ll stay with him.”

“Yes, nurse him back to health,” Finn sent her air kisses. “Kiss all his boo-boos.”

“Go away!” Rey laughed as he and the other frat brothers left, closing the door behind them and leaving Rey and Mr. Ren alone. The room was dark, save for the light from the party outside, and Rey turned on the small desk lamp next to Finn’s bed as it illuminated Ren’s prone form.

“Mr. Ren?” She called softly, sitting on the edge of the bed next to where he was resting. He shook his head at her, his eyes still unfocused.

“Ben,” he moaned into the pillows, closing his eyes against the dim light of the desk lamp. “Call me Ben.”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her heart already beating wildly. “Is everything okay, Ben?”

“No,” he moaned sadly, “Nothing is okay.”

“What’s wrong?” She reached over and smoothed back the hair that had escaped his braids. He closed his eyes and hummed at her touch.

“You’re going to leave me,” he mumbled softly, shocking her into stillness. What in the world was he talking about? She wasn’t going anywhere while she still had a college degree to finish.

“Ben, what do you mean?” She resumed her petting, noticing how the action relaxed him back into the pillows. “I’m right here.”

“You’re going to use your Einstein brain and create a spaceship and leave me forever,” he babbled, the alcohol loosening his tongue. “When you’re the only person worth being on this planet for.” His confession ended on a choked sob as her heart stuttered wildly. 

“Ben,” she tried to speak, but he looked up at her with red-rimmed eyes that instantly quieted her.

“Snoke said you were a distraction,” she was stunned to see a single tear collect in the corner of his eye. “That you would ruin me, and drain me dry,” he shook his head, his hand coming up to caress her face gently. “But how could that be when all you do is fill my life with happiness?”

Rey was caught in his gaze, and allowed him to pull her next to him on the mattress, squishing against him on the tiny twin sized bed. Ben pulled her closely to his broad chest, taking up most of the space with his giant frame as she tried her best to make herself comfortable with the little space she had. 

“Ben,” she loved the way his body felt next to her, but she was apprehensive to say the least as she nestled in next to him. The memories of their previous encounters with sleepovers weighed heavily on her. “You said we would never do this again.”

That didn’t stop her from wrapping her arms around him while he did the same.

“I know.”

“I told myself I would never sleep in the same bed as you again.”

His hold on her tightened. “Please don’t leave me, Rey.”

“I won’t,” a tear slipped from her eye and landed on Ben’s plaid shirt. “I’m right here.”

And despite her better judgement, and all the promises she had made to herself after their argument, Rey fell asleep in Ben’s arms, nestled in his embrace as the sounds of the raging frat party bled through the open window of Finn's bedroom.


	16. Lazy Sunday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 80,000 words and still no kiss??? Minsky needs to fix that, stat!
> 
> Hold on to your butts!

The first thing Rey realized the next morning was that she was absolutely freezing.

There was warmth around her to be sure, she could feel it, but the chill in the air cancelled it out as she began to shiver. The light was bright in the room, and as she opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was Mr. Ren’s sleeping face.

He was so close to her she could basically nuzzle their noses together, sharing a squished pillow on the tiny bed in Finn’s bedroom. The window had been left open and the temperature must have plunged overnight as her teeth began to slightly chatter. She wanted to bury herself in Mr. Ren’s embrace but was afraid to wake him up, wondering what version of the man would greet her today. Yesterday he seemed to have reverted back into a college student and to be honest, she kind of preferred it when Mr. Ren was on his best behavior.

Rey didn’t even want to think about what his reaction would be to last night’s drinking. Would he even remember the things he had done? Would he remember his drunken confessions to her? Should she tell him the truth if he didn’t?

There were so many things to consider, but right now her main objective was to get her body to stop shaking as she tried to reach over and pull Finn’s comforter over her and Mr. Ren. The second she tried to move, however, strong arms latched themselves around her and she couldn’t shift an inch. Her jaw was starting to hurt from the chattering, but at least his arms were warm.

She whined a bit, trying to push him away so she could at least shut the window, but he still wouldn’t let her move. Their faces were inches apart and she decided to just wake him up and rip off the proverbial band aid. It had to be late in the morning anyway, from the brightness of the October sun.

“Mr. Ren?” She cooed softly, wondering if he had a headache from the excess alcohol. She tried to poke him as best as she could with her trapped arms. “I’m cold.” He grunted once, his breath fanning against her face from the opposite side of the pillow. Slowly, he opened his eyes and looked at her, his gaze a bit unfocused. His voice was gravelly from sleep as he regarded her through hooded lids.

He seemed to have understood her, because he reached behind him and pulled Finn’s comforter over their heads and bodies, enveloping them in warmth as the dark fabric blocked out some of the light. They were still basically eye level when he adjusted his body, holding her close as his thumbs traced lazy circles in the skin of her lower back.

She was frozen again, but not from the cold.

“Is this a dream?” He asked sleepily, still holding on to her. 

“No,” she breathed, resisting the urge to close the very slight distance between them. Even first thing in the morning, Mr. Ren looked handsome in the scruffiest way. “This is real.”

He smiled for a moment, closing his eyes before they snapped open again, pulling his arms away from her as he quickly sat up with shocked eyes. A burst of cold air greeted her again, but at least this time she had a blanket to wrap around her as Mr. Ren scooted as far away from her as the little bed would allow.

Rey turned down her lips in an angry pout, hating her weakness in sleeping next to him once more. She should have never taken his drunken confessions seriously. She was only setting herself up for more heartbreak as she watched Mr. Ren frantically run his fingers through his hair, detangling the braids and letting his hair fly in every direction. Rey was waiting for the inevitable moment when Ren would push her away again, claiming their relationship was inappropriate and unprofessional, just like he had the last time.

But that moment never came.

They were both still in their clothes from yesterday, the plaid shirt wrinkled beyond measure as she stared at his wide back. He took heaving breaths as his head sunk into his hands.

“What happened last night, Miss Jackson?” He rumbled from his hunched position.

Rey shut her eyes against the coming tears. It was like yesterday had never happened.

“We’re still at the frat house, Mr. Ren. You got really drunk.” She was trying her best not to cry, but after everything she had seen and overheard the day before, she hadn’t expected him to react this way. 

“What. Happened?” He grit through clenched teeth as she hiccuped softly, trying to rein in her sadness.

“Finn and I brought you upstairs,” she recalled, trying not to look at him. “You were babbling and you asked me to stay.”

He finally turned to her, a panic in his eyes that frightened her. “What did I say, Miss Jackson? Tell me now!” They had argued before, but Mr. Ren had never yelled at her in such a way as she stuttered out the truth, too overwhelmed to try to gloss it over with lies.

“You said I was the only person that mattered to you,” she spit heatedly. Rey grew angry at him, his mercurial behavior, and his shifting moods, tired of never knowing where she stood in their relationship. “You begged me not to leave!” His gaze was wide-eyed and stunned. She couldn’t stand the emotional rollercoaster of their relationship anymore as her face crumpled in tears. “You told me I made you happy.” Her voice trailed off on a pathetic note, ready for his dismissal and the heartbreak that was sure to follow as she hung her head sadly.

Mr. Ren was quiet, turning his body around to face her on the bed as she buried her face in the comforter, ashamed at her weakness in sharing a bed with him once more. She should have been strong, she should have listened to herself and resisted his drunk begging. . .

The mattress shifted, and the comforter was gently pulled away from her face as she looked up at her benefactor. He was gazing down at her softly, tilting her chin up so she could meet the swirling browns of his eyes. A thumb came up to brush away the tears that were sliding down her cheeks.

“You do, Miss Jackson,” he said warmly, scooting as close to her as the small bed would allow. “I am never as happy as when I am with you.” He looked thoughtful for a moment. 

“What?” She tilted her head in confusion.

“I’m a fool, Miss Jackson. A coward and a fool.” He dropped his hand into a fist at his side. “My behavior last night might have been reckless and juvenile, but it got me to admit something that I have not had the strength to admit on my own.”

“Mr. Ren?”

“I-” he struggled with getting out the words as he took a deep and steady breath. He stood from the bed, looking down at her with his usual arrogance and conceit. If she were being honest with herself, she had kind of missed his stuffy behavior. “I wish to end this pointless ruse that has existed between us, Miss Jackson. It benefits no one to perpetuate such lies in regards to our loved ones and I believe there is a very efficient way we can remedy the issue.”

“What issue?” She had no idea what the man was talking about. “What are you talking about?”

“I no longer wish to lie about our relationship status, and claim that we are something we’re not,” he proclaimed as her spirits fell like an avalanche. Now she couldn’t even keep a fake-boyfriend?

“Oh, o-okay,” she said shakily, wanting to cry again as she turned her head away.

“I wish for you to become my actual girlfriend.” 

Rey turned her head so fast she thought she’d pulled a muscle. “What?”

“It is abhorrent to me that I was able to confess something so important while under the influence, when I’ve been too afraid to tell you the truth for real,” he sat down next to her, reaching for her hand and taking it in his own as they sat together cross-legged on the bed. “I have felt this way for a long time, Miss Jackson. I hope that you feel the same. Please do me the honor of being my girlfriend.”

“B-but,” she stuttered, not truly believing this was really happening to her. All of her dreams were suddenly coming true, but the nagging doubts still battered against her peace of mind. “What about your boss? What about work?”

“I told you, Snoke has no say in my personal life anymore,” he urged her to believe him, but she had been hurt before and didn’t want it to happen again. “If he tries, I’ll go to HR and have him reported for harassment.”

“I-I don’t know what to say, Mr. Ren.” His soulful eyes were begging for a chance and she wanted so badly to believe this was real. 

“Say you care about me as much as I care about you,” he begged, and Rey remembered the conversation she had overheard the day before. Was this the confession he had been dreading telling her? It must have been as he looked at her with pure hope in his eyes. She wanted to believe it was the same hope that had been bubbling inside of her over the past month and a half.

“Yes,” she nodded, her heart feeling more full than she could ever remember. “I do, I care about you, Mr. Ren.” She bit her lip as his eyes brightened. “I want to be your girlfriend.”

The pride was beaming from his gaze. “I,” he cleared his throat, scooting closer to her. “I would very much like to kiss you.”

Rey had never heard a more beautiful sentence in her life. It filled her up with a warmth that infused every cell of her body, summoning a smile to her face as her spirits lifted to the clouds.

“I would like that,” she agreed, and watched as he lifted up a hand to caress her cheek. His thumb grazed the edge of her lips as he leaned down and finally closed the distance between them.

Her eyes closed in bliss when she felt his lips against hers, pillow soft and supple as the first moments were sweet, but a bit awkward. The angle of her head wasn’t great, and his nose was in the way. With a short gasp of air he maneuvered their bodies in the slightest angle so their lips merged like puzzle pieces, slotting together and coming apart in a dance that Rey had never learned the steps to. But with Mr. Ren it felt as natural as breathing as her arms came up to rest on his broad shoulders. She stood up on her knees, gaining leverage as he tilted up his head to keep their lips locked. His arms came around her waist as they kissed softly, coming up for air after a few more moments.

It was chaste and a bit awkward, but it was theirs, and it was perfect. Their foreheads rested against the other, their breaths coming out in little puffs.

“I liked that,” she whispered against his lips, wanting it again and again and never wanting to stop.

“I liked it, too,” he said, pressing his luscious lips against hers once more in the most precious of pecks. “But before we can do it again, I have to tell you something. Something important.”

Rey looked up at him in surprise, wondering what he had to say. She thought he had already dropped his big confession on her, and was nervous about what he planned to divulge next.

“What is it?” She worried.

“I-I don’t know how to tell you this,” he looked away from her, and she had to turn his chin back towards her with a gentle touch. “I’m afraid you won’t feel the same way about me when I do.”

“Ben,” she called him by his first name on purpose, liking the way he perked up when she did. “There is nothing you could say that would change my mind about this. I’ve had feelings for you for a long time.”

He shook his head, fear evident in his gaze. After a few deep breaths and a heavy gulp, he closed his eyes before leveling her with a determined gaze. 

“That was my first kiss.” Her eyes widened as he continued. “You’re my first girlfriend, you’re my first everything.” He shook his head, ashamed of his confession. “I’m a virgin, Rey.”

Rey didn’t know what to say. She knew he was a quiet, taciturn man, but she assumed that a man as handsome and successful as Mr. Ren would have picked up some kind of sexual experience over the years. 

She had obviously been mistaken.

Mr. Ren looked crushed at this revelation but to Rey, it was the best news of her life. The fact that he was just as inexperienced as she was left her feeling relieved and hopeful for the future of their relationship. Now they could take their time and enjoy the other person instead of rushing into something Rey was still not ready for.

“That doesn’t matter to me,” she rubbed his arm as a way to console him, but those were definitely the wrong words to say as he recoiled from her.

“It matters to me!” His hands clenched into fists and his jaw was ticking wildly. “Do you know how it feels, to share a bed with you, and want to touch you, and not know where to begin?” He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “To want to show you affection when no one has ever given it to me?”

“Yes,” Rey urged, reaching out for him again and taking his hand, smoothing out the clenched fingers and holding his giant palm in hers. “I know exactly how it feels.” His eyes were wide as she released her deepest secret to the man she cared for more than anything. “I’m a virgin, too.”

Ren’s face went pale as he grabbed the hand that was holding his, his movement frantic, his eyes wild. “Are you serious?” He looked at her as if he didn’t believe her. “How is that possible? You’re the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen.”

Rey powered through her blush to answer his question. He had claimed to never know her thoughts, so today she was going to share more than she normally would. “It’s kind of hard to build relationships with people when you’re trying to survive on the streets.” She shrugged ruefully. “I couldn’t let my guard down for even a second, and I didn’t want to.” Rey wrapped her arms around his neck again. “I was waiting for someone special. Now I found him.” 

He looked at her like he couldn’t believe she was real. His voice was so soft she could barely hear it. “What did I ever do to deserve you, Rey?” She shook her head, feeling absolutely incredulous at his claim.

“How can you say that?” She gasped. “Y-you saved me, Ben. You helped me afford school. You donate money to charities like you’re trying to give your bank account away,” she pressed a kiss to his stubbly jaw, lingering there for a few seconds. “You’re the most generous person I have ever known. You have no idea how much you mean to me.”

“But what if it’s not enough?” He was letting all of his insecurities show this morning as they both felt vulnerable from their confessions. “What if I can’t give you what you need?”

“That won’t matter,” Rey urged. “Can’t you see how amazing this is?”

“How?”

“We get to discover everything together,” she held onto him tightly. “No one else has ever touched you before. No one else has ever touched me.” She tried to broadcast all the affection she felt for him as their eyes locked together. “You will be mine and I will be yours.”

His breath caught at her words, his eyes shimmering with emotion. “You will be mine and I will be yours,” he promised, repeating her words like an oath as they sat in the chilly bedroom. She wanted to kiss him again, needed to kiss him again, but there was something else nagging in her mind.

“There’s one other thing,” she demanded shyly, grabbing his attention once more. “Please don’t push me away again,” she pleaded, noticing the way his entire face crumpled in a wince. “If you do,” she shook her head sadly. “I don’t think I could ever come back.”

He pulled her in for a hug, crushing her against him as he kissed the crown of her head. “I was a fool for listening to Snoke. It will not happen again.”

“What about our business relationship?” Rey asked, moving from his embrace. “You’re my benefactor. I’m your protegee. How does this change things?”

“It doesn’t,” Ren assured her fondly. “No matter what happens, Rey, I have pledged myself to your future. Nothing can change that, even if we break up or have some kind of falling out, which I won’t even deign to consider.” He sniffed haughtily. “We will have to make sure our personal relationship does not bleed into our business relationship. While we are out at events we must be on our best behavior, but when we are alone we may conduct ourselves however we wish.”

Rey smiled fondly, glad that Mr. Ren seemed to be back to his normal self. “So what should I call you? My benefactor-boyfriend?”

He looked at her like she was insane. “What?”

“My bene-friend?”

“No, Miss Jackson.”

“My boy-factor?”

“Stop this silliness.”

“My benefactor with benefits?”

That got a chuckle out of him. “Rey!” He half-laughed, half-shouted. It was the best sound she had heard all morning.

“Yes, Ben?” He glared down at her, trying to look angry while the humor in his eyes betrayed him. 

“Kiss me at once and cease with this foolishness, Miss Jackson,” he demanded fondly.

“Yes, Mr. Ren,” she grinned as their lips met once more. It was still just as chaste and sweet as their first kiss, but this time Rey leaned in a little closer, pressed her lips a little harder, let slip a little moan. He pulled the both of them back down onto the mattress while their lips were still locked together, tucking her into his side once more as he held her close to him.

“The morning before I left for London, when you slept over,” he breathed as they separated for air. “I thought it was a dream. I couldn’t believe I had you in my arms, and you felt so good.” He kissed her once more as if he just remembered that he could now do it whenever he wanted. It was a curious feeling for Rey as well. “And when I woke up I was so ashamed to have touched you without permission. I thought you were going to be furious with me.”

“No,” she shook her head gently, pressing her palm against his soft shirt. “I really liked it,” she confessed. “It’s all I thought about while you were away.” The cotton felt supple under her fingers as she traced lazy patterns on his wrinkled shirt. 

“This is the same shirt you wore the first night you stayed,” he whispered while she closed her eyes against the myriad sensations coursing through her. “I wear it all the time,” he confessed.

“I know,” she could remember at least two different instances where he had worn the shirt around her. “I wasn’t sure if you knew.”

“I knew, Miss Jackson.” She narrowed her eyes at him with pursed lips.

“You and I are in the middle of making out and you still call me Miss Jackson?”

“Well, I have always believed in maintaining a proper sense of decorum in all situations,” he grinned. “Why should addressing my girlfriend be any different?”

She shook her head, beaming at him. “Whatever you say Mr. Ren.”

His voice became teasing as he smoothed back her flyaway bed hair. “There’s been something on my mind all night, Miss Jackson. I’m hoping you can help me shine a light on it.”

“What’s the matter?”

“When did you start telling your friends that you had a boyfriend named Ben?” His eyebrow raised at her playfully while she blanched. “Your friends claimed to have wanted to meet me for weeks.”

“Um,” she tried to look away from him, but his face was only inches from hers with no escape in sight. She released a shaky breath, knowing he deserved the truth.

“Since the day after Hux’s birthday party,” her face erupted in a blush at his stunned silence. “When we told each other we weren’t alone.”

He looked thoughtful for a moment, then brought a hand to cup the side of her face. “That was way before my mother’s gala.”

“I know,” she replied stubbornly.

“And you did this, why?”

“Well, to start it was a cover story, to explain away our nights out,” she recounted, her voice lowering. “Then it was a way to show my friends that I wasn’t some kind of prude.”

“A prude?” He tilted his head. “Miss Jackson, you have been nothing but a temptation since the moment we met.”

She fluttered her lashes at him. “Really?”

“Yes,” Ren grumbled, shifting his body on the tiny mattress. “It has taken a monumental effort on my part to keep my hands off of you. I admit, I have failed on numerous occasions.”

“Well, not anymore,” she urged, tugging at the collar of his shirt. “Now you can touch me whenever you want.”

“Yes,” the browns in his eyes darkened to almost black. “Yes, I must take advantage of his new development in our relationship, Miss Jackson.” 

He placed an arm around her waist, pulling her flush against him as their bodies connected at a million different contact points. The electricity surged through her, an unstoppable force in her body as he pulled her in for another deep kiss. Rey opened her mouth slightly this time, allowing her tongue to flick at the seam of his lips as he opened up with a steady moan. She swallowed the sounds with her kisses, loving that every time she did, she knew they were experiencing it for the first time together. It was a heady, addictive sensation that left her feeling powerful and passionate.

He opened his lips the next time they met, shyly dragging his tongue against hers in the slightest of touches. Rey could not understand how one simple caress could make her body feel like it was melting into a puddle of goo, but she never wanted it to stop.

Rey knew for a fact that she could spend the entire morning kissing and cuddling with her bene-friend, but life had other plans for her as the owner of the room returned home for the morning. A small, tentative knock sounded on the door, and she could hear Finn and Rose giggling behind it.

“You two doing okay?” They asked like overeager parents, opening the door a bit and peeking in while she and Ren regretfully pulled their lips apart. They struggled to get up again on the small space as Rose bounced into the room.

“So? So?” She giggled excitedly. “Is it official yet? Are you guys really dating now?”

Ren raised his eyebrows at her in amusement as Rey rubbed a hand over her face. “Yes, Rose, we are officially official. Ben is my boyfriend.”

“I knew it!” Rose turned to Finn, holding her hand out and wiggling her fingers. “See? Dating by midterms. Pay up, fool.”

“Oi!” Rey scolded as Finn dug into his wallet. Mr. Ren stood up from the bed with a giant stretch, unfazed by the antics of her friends while he rubbed at his forehead. She wondered if he had a hangover from the night before. “You placed bets on me?”

“Well, technically it’s after midterms, Rose,” Finn hedged, hesitant to pass over the cash. Rose was not having it.

“Gimme the money, dummy. I called this weeks ago.” Rose took her prize from her boyfriend, a crumpled twenty dollar bill, and shoved it in her pocket. “We made you guys breakfast downstairs,” she grinned up at Ren. “Bestie breakfast! Let’s go!” Rose and Finn lead the charge downstairs while Rey called after them. 

“We’ll be right there!” She got up from the bed, stretching out in the same clothes she had worn for the past twenty-four hours. “Ugh, I need to change.”

“So do I,” he looked down at himself and sighed. “I found this shirt in a box labeled ‘Let the Past Die.’”

“What?” She shook her head on a laugh.

“It’s from before I started at First Order,” he reached for her hand as they made their way downstairs. “I dressed very differently before I worked there.”

“So yesterday was a return to your old style?” She teased as his cheeks pinkened. “Grunge Ren?”

“No, I was a teenager in the early 2000’s, Miss Jackson, get it right.” He raised his eyebrows playfully. “That was the era of emo.”

“Emo Ren! Well now it all makes perfect sense,” she laughed as she joined her friends downstairs. Most of the frat house was still quiet, but there were two guys playing video games in the living room, and every now and then someone would stumble into the kitchen for water or coffee. Rey and Mr. Ren sat down at a table still littered with detritus from the night before. Mr. Ren looked down with distaste as he pushed away some of the garbage, but blessedly said nothing as Finn and Rose passed them each a plate of french toast.

Ren continued to rub his head as he began to eat his breakfast. She nudged him with her elbow. “Hey? You okay?”

“I seem to have a bit of a hangover,” he mumbled while Finn and Rose tidied up. “Next time I decide to drink like a twenty year old, remind me that I am, in fact, an old man and can no longer handle it.”

“Whatever you say, Grandpa,” she grinned as she took a bite. He covered his grimace with a bite of his own food as Finn and Rose joined them at the table.

“Where’s Poe?” Rey asked between bites.

“I think he was just going to bed when we came in this morning. He was up all night taking care of the party.” Finn waved the thought away. “He won’t be up for hours and hours. What are you guys doing today?”

She looked up at Mr. Ren with wide, excited eyes. “I don’t know Ben, what are we doing today?”

He looked thoughtful for a moment, then popped a piece of toast in his mouth. “I have an idea,” he mumbled between bites. “But I must return home and change.”

“Me too,” she agreed. “What about you guys?”

“We’re gonna stay here for a while,” Finn said. “Start cleaning up.” Rey looked around the messy space, littered with empty cups and cans everywhere. The air smelled stale with the lingering stink of alcohol and weed. They definitely had their work cut out for them as she shook her head.

“Good luck.”

The friends finished their breakfast, and she and Mr. Ren walked the few blocks to his parked BMW. Luckily, nothing had happened to it overnight as they drove the short distance back to campus. She entered her room with her boyfriend following close behind, still not believing that she could actually call him that for real. She returned her prototype and notes to their normal place and turned to Mr. Ren, feeling shy. She had to change, but part of her didn’t want to leave the room. Since they had only been together for an hour, she didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable by stripping in front of him.

“C-can you turn around?” She asked him shakily as he sat on the edge of her bed, running his hand over the lumpy grey comforter. He looked up at her with knowing eyes.

“Of course,” he said, the picture of chivalry as he turned his back to her and gave her privacy. She changed quickly, wondering if he would peek at her, even glancing over her shoulder to check. But Mr. Ren was dutifully looking the other way, completely immune to the temptation as she got into a new set of clothing for the chilly fall day. A deep green sweater and black leggings with knee-high boots. She even slipped on his earrings with a smile.

“Okay,” she said softly, grabbing her bag. “I’m ready.”

He turned to face her, his gaze becoming soft as he took in the earrings. He came up to her, gently holding her face by framing it with his large and warm hands. She pressed her cheek into one of them fondly, loving every bit of attention he was paying her.

“You have no idea what it does to me to see you wear these,” his voice rumbled around her, sending a thrill straight to the core of her. “One day, I will see you wearing nothing but diamonds, dripping from every part of you as they decorate your skin with light.” It was the most sensual, seductive thing he had ever said to her as her face erupted in a crimson blush.

“Mr. Ren,” she breathed as he kissed her once more, his mouth slanting over hers as he improved his technique with every press of the lips. Kissing was starting to become as easy as air as a wave of heat overtook her at the mental image his words had constructed. She pulled away, breathing heavily, too overwhelmed by him and the feelings he elicited in her.

“Now, we must go to my place first so I can change,” he said, noticing the clock and how their lazy Sunday was quickly passing them by. “We still have much to do.”

“What are we doing today?”

“You will see,” he teased coyly, and she wondered what he had in store for her. Maybe the opera? Maybe a boat ride on the Hudson river? The possibilities were endless as they stopped by his apartment. He placed their bounty of apples in his kitchen before changing quickly into his normal business-casual attire. It was already into the afternoon when they drove a little ways out of town and pulled into a long strip mall.

“What are we doing here?” She frowned as he pulled up in front of a Home Goods store. “I thought you said we were having fun today.”

“This is it, Miss Jackson. You have no idea how happy this will make me.” They got out of the car as Rey grimaced deeply, not understanding his motives or his actions. What were they doing at a suburban strip mall? He looked and sounded like Mr. Ren again but his actions were still jarring to say the least.

He got a shopping cart and pulled out his wallet, passing her a black American Express card. She knew for a fact that it was the kind of credit card people did not apply for. They were only given to the wealthiest, most richest people in the world. She looked up at him wide-eyed.

“Mr. Ren?”

“Your dorm room is too empty,” he explained, leading them to the bedroom section of the discount store. “And since you still feel hesitant about allowing me to buy you things, this will be a bit of practice. I want you to pick out some nice things for your room.”

“Mr. Ren,” she went to argue, but the look in his eyes was enough to silence her immediately. Their conversation from the day before left her feeling grateful, but uneasy about his level of generosity. As empty as her dorm room was, part of her still felt odd about using him as a personal ATM. But since he genuinely seemed to like buying her things, she reasoned that it was okay. “I promise I won’t spend a lot of money.”

“It matters not, Miss Jackson,” he grumbled. “I could buy every single item in this store and still have money to purchase the building.” He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Probably the entire piece of land, too.”

“Alright, fine,” she acquiesced, liking the soft smile on his face at her acceptance. “Let’s go.”

They walked around the store for a while, and the first thing she picked up was a plush comforter in a dark hunter green, with all the swirling hues of the forest blended together in the weave of the blanket. Matching sheets completed the bedroom set as she moved over to posters. She picked up a few in different sizes, including one for Stranger Things, her favorite show, and a poster of a gorgeous mountain scene overlooking a crystal blue lake. Then she picked up a swirling tapestry with a mandala pattern to hang over her bed, along with some sticky hooks for the walls.

She ended her shopping spree by picking up some organizing tools for her desk, including a new stand-up lamp for her and Rose to set up in the room. Her final purchase was a fluffy bean bag chair for her floor, just because she had always wanted one.

Mr. Ren was behind her at all times, not saying anything about her choices, but humming in appreciation every time she placed something in the cart. The total came out to be a little more than a hundred and fifty dollars, and Rey had to stop herself from resisting as she passed over the black credit card with a grimace. When they exited the store with her purchases, Ren carried the larger bags back to the car with a contented smile on his face.

They buckled in, and she passed the card back to him. “How did I do?” She asked sweetly.

“Beautifully, Miss Jackson,” he looked down at her affectionately. “I thought for sure you would balk when you saw the total, but you truly made me happy. Thank you.”

“I should be the one thanking you!” She laughed, completely incredulous as they made their way back to campus. He helped her carry the bags upstairs, then aided her in the redecoration of her room. She changed the sheets and comforter, hung up the posters, and draped the tapestry on the ceiling in a decorative overhang. He put together the standing lamp and adjusted the chair so it rested in the space between Rose and Rey’s nightstands. When Rey finished, she joined Mr. Ren by the door of her room, taking in the completely furnished space. Her side of the room was no longer empty, and for the first time in her life she felt like she truly had a place to call her own. 

“Come on,” she grabbed his hand, pulling him to her bed. While the extra long twin was longer and slightly wider than Finn’s bed, there was still very little space for them both as she snuggled into his side. She reached for the remote and put on Netflix, leaning into Ren’s chest as an arm came up to hold her.

“This is nice,” Ren rumbled, his voice soothing her as he rubbed her back.

“This is only the beginning of your vacation, Mr. Ren,” she nuzzled her forehead against his soft grey sweater. “You still have the rest of the week to sit around and be lazy.” While she had classes to go to all week, Ren got to relax and do nothing while he focused on resting and recuperating from the stress of his job.

He kissed the top of her head, settling in to her new sheets with a soft sigh. “Yes, well, it’s better when I’m with you.”

With that statement, Rose and Finn finally returned from their afternoon of cleaning the frat house. They bounced onto Rose’s bed and nestled themselves in the same position as Ren and Rey, sitting back and watching Netflix with the happy couple.

It took everything for Rey not to burst into tears in that quiet, peaceful moment. All of her life, she had always been alone, always wanting and hoping for more. No friends, no family, no place to call her own. But here, in this little ten foot room on a sprawling campus in another country, Rey had the best friends she had ever known, a space that was wholly and entirely hers, and a man who was holding her like she was the most precious thing in the entire world.

It was every single dream of her heart, all coming true at once. It made her hold Mr. Ren even tighter as the two couples lounged in the peaceful serenity of their lazy afternoon.


	17. A New Hobby

The two couples continued to watch TV and lounge all day, introducing Mr. Ren to the shows that they loved on Netflix. He’d been paying for the streaming service for years, but had never once actually sat down and browsed through the titles. They made him watch two episodes of Stranger Things, and while he grumbled about the similarities it shared with some of his favorite movies, he didn’t ask them to shut it off or change it. Then they watched Rey’s new favorite, Nailed It, and Ren kept cracking wise remarks about wanting to see Rey as a contestant. She could feel his chest rumbling with laughter every time she poked him in mock offense. 

As much as Rey wanted their Lazy Sunday to last forever, Mr. Ren, her new boyfriend, decided that he couldn’t spend another night sharing a twin bed with another person and needed to sleep in his own.

“I won’t be able to walk tomorrow,” he grumbled as Rey accompanied him down to his car. The sun was about to set and the sky was swirling in oranges and yellows. “You must take into consideration my back, Miss Jackson.”

Rey grinned at his surly behavior. “So, what are you going to do this week?” She asked as he frowned. “Are we having dinner with Hux and Phasma on Tuesday?”

Ren shook his head. “I need a break from everything to do with the office, including the people. Besides, I’m pretty sure that Hux is still vexed with me. I threw some paperwork in his face on Thursday and the binder clip poked him in the eye.”

“Mr. Ren,” she clucked her tongue in disapproval and he narrowed his eyes at her. “You have to be nicer to the people you work with.”

Ren stuck his nose in the air, his expression the height of arrogance. “It is easier said than done, Miss Jackson. I was having a bad week and we weren’t speaking to one another...”

“That’s not an excuse,” Rey crossed her arms over her chest, her gaze as cold as steel as she held him in his place with a look. “Our relationship should have nothing to do with the way you treat your co-workers. I know we’re each other’s firsts, but I’m pretty sure that’s not what defines a healthy relationship.” Ren did not look happy at her scolding, and Rey knew that they had a long ways to go before her influence made a significant difference in Ren’s life. Just because they were dating now, didn’t mean that Mr. Ren would magically change overnight. It would take a lot of work, but Rey was ready and willing to try. “You can’t let your personal life affect your business life. It must be separate. Isn’t that what you told me?

Ren scowled deeply, his forehead twisted in annoyance. “You have no idea the level of stress I am under on a daily basis.” His fists clenched at his sides. “You have no idea how much it calms me when we speak.”

“I understand that, Ben,” Rey liked that they were still referring to each other by their last names. It made it even more special when she called him Ben. “I do.” She reached for his hand and entwined their fingers, holding on tightly. “And you have no idea how happy it makes me to know that I can help you in that way. But you can’t take all of your anger out on your coworkers. It’s not good for them, it’s not good for you, and it’s not good for our relationship. I won’t be made to feel guilty because we get into arguments, worrying how your co-workers will suffer because of it.”

Finally, Ren seemed to understand where she was coming from, looking slightly chastened. “I see your point, Miss Jackson.”

“Because we will fight,” Ren looked surprised at Rey’s ardent claim, but she continued uninterrupted. “You and I can’t help it. It just happens. We argue and we point out each other’s flaws and we fight to make the other a better person. We’ve been doing it for over a month, I highly doubt it will stop now.”

“No,” he mused, smiling ruefully. “In fact, I feel more confident knowing how you feel about me. It’s as if I’m unafraid to speak my mind now because I know you care.”

She squeezed his hand again. “We started this relationship with the goal of helping one another. That’s not going to change. I won’t stop fighting for you, even if I have to fight with you.” She wrinkled her nose at him. “Just leave your co-workers out of it.”

Ren nodded his agreement. “I will try my hardest from now on, Rey. I give you my word.”

“Good.” Rey was pleased that they had already cleared the air after their little scrimmage. As long as their arguments went as smoothly as that one, everything would be perfect. “Now, if there’s no dinner with Hux and Phasma, what are you doing this week? Any events? Any shows you want to watch? Any errands you want to run?” She perked up with a short gasp. “Maybe you can find a hobby!”

The man looked terrified, as if she had asked him to swim with sharks instead of find ways to amuse himself. 

“I-I’m not sure, Miss Jackson. I have not had this much free time in years. I hardly know what to do with myself.”

“I’m sure you’ll figure out something to do,” her mouth puckered in concern. “Call me if you’re bored. I’ll come over and keep you company after class.”

A most mischievous look blossomed on his face. “We can try another cooking lesson. A proper dinner this time.”

“Ooh, yay!” She clapped a little, nodding gleefully. “Just pick a day!” 

“I shall let you know tomorrow.” He leaned down and kissed her softly, their movements slow and sweet. “It is amazing that I am allowed to do that whenever I want now,” he grinned against her mouth. 

“I know,” she sighed dreamily. “I feel like I need to pinch myself as well.” He kissed her once more, unlocking the door to his car and climbing in. “I’ll call you as soon as my inevitable boredom sets in.”

“Goodnight, Mr. Ren,” she blew him a kiss and she could see his blush from the sidewalk. 

“Goodnight, Miss Jackson,” he called as he pulled away, her heart stuttering in her chest as she watched him pull away. It was almost unreal, to really be able to claim Mr. Ren as her own. Her heart felt fit to burst from all the emotion overflowing inside of her, and his lips on hers made her feel things she had never thought possible. He hadn’t even been gone for five minutes and she was already anticipating their next meeting.

True to his word, Mr. Ren called her the next afternoon, asking her over for dinner on Wednesday. She wasn’t thrilled to wait another two days to see him, but knew that there would be plenty of kisses waiting for her to make up for it. Just because they were dating, didn’t mean they had to be attached at the hip all the time.

Even though she wouldn’t mind it.

“What have you been doing all day?” She asked him while biting into one of the giant apples he had left her from their bounty. Rose did her homework with her earbuds in across the room, bobbing her head to music. 

“It turns out there’s a gym downstairs, so I utilized it for the majority of the morning,” he informed her. “I normally use the one in my office building. I take my physique very seriously, Miss Jackson.”

Boy, did she know it. The memory of him sliding his jeans over his perfect ass was one of her favorites from their time together. “Yes, I noticed.” 

If they weren’t two blushing virgins, one of them would have made some kind of flirty innuendo, but they were, so the conversation continued. “Now I am watching that show again.”

That piqued her interest. “What show?”

“The little girl with the telekinesis,” he grumbled, not sounding happy about it. “I find her to be quite endearing.”

She munched on her apple with a grin on her face. “Yay!” She squealed between bites. “I hoped you would like it.”

“Yes, well, it’s passable at best,” he sniped.

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes, taking another huge bite. Rey knew he liked the show and was hesitant to admit it. They set up the details for their next lesson ,and Rey spent the rest of her night studying and looking forward to Wednesday and the kisses that would come to pass.

The next day Rey powered through her classes, knowing that the semester was already half over as she received some of the scores from her midterms. She had aced her calculus midterm and was still waiting on a Sociology paper and another grade from her portfolio project. At this point, Rey’s focus was on studying the theory behind her design and whether or not it could become a plausible piece of technology. With her notes from Commander Solo she already felt confident about the next part of her project as Director Krennic passed back her assignment. The bright red A at the top of the paper filled her with pride as she quickly turned it over to read her professor’s comments. The untidy scrawl was even more hard to read as she tried to squint and make out the handwriting.

You may have stumbled upon something marvelous. Keep impressing me. 

Rey wanted to pump her fist in the air. Nothing made her feel better than showing off her skills and getting recognized for it. It put her in a wonderful mood as she strutted her way out of her afternoon class, excited to meet her friends for Taco Tuesday. She was heading to her dorm room to drop off her books when her phone suddenly rang with the new twinkling ringtone she had chosen for Mr. Ren. Now she had an opportunity to share her good grades with him.

“Hey, I was hoping you’d call,” she said sweetly, but her mood instantly shifted when she heard the loud, booming voice of Kylo Ren. 

“Where are you?” He demanded forcefully, making her heart leap from the shock of his anger.

“I’m on my way to Taco Tuesday, what’s the matter?”

“I need you to come over right now, Miss Jackson. It is a matter of urgency.” Rey didn’t know how to interpret the commanding tone on the other end of the line. He sounded equal parts angry and nervous and she had no idea what to expect. 

“But I’m supposed to see you tomorrow.”

“It cannot wait, Rey!” He shouted, which made her realize exactly how serious the issue must be if he was using her actual name. “I sent Rook to pick you up behind your dorm. He should be there within minutes.”

“Will you at least tell me what’s the matter?” His response to that was to hang up on her. Insufferable man! “Argh!” Rey grumbled loudly in the middle of the crowded courtyard of students, earning some odd looks from her peers. She texted her apologies to Rose for missing out on tacos again as Rook picked her up in their normal spot.

Rey was anxious the entire ride to the Hosnian Prime, her fingers twisting in her lap as she bit her lip in worry. He wasn’t working, which was the normal cause of his stress, so what could have set off his anger? Rey was about to find out as the car pulled up in front of his building, the doormen opening the doors for her quickly at her approach. They seemed to treat her as if she were some kind of queen ever since she had let slip that Ren had given her his elevator code.

She made her way to his apartment, where he was already standing in the foyer waiting for her. He had shaven away the weekend stubble and wore loose black pajama pants, his hair wild as his arms were crossed over a grey t-shirt.

“Alright, now what was so important that you made me cancel Taco Tuesday?” She asked, following him into the apartment. He tossed something at her, a heavy, large envelope made of thick glossy paper that shined in the light of the apartment. It was addressed to “Kylo Ren of the First Order,” written in fancy calligraphy. She looked up at him in confusion.

“What’s this?”

He glared at the envelope as if it offended him. “Read it yourself, Miss Jackson. It concerns you, too.”

Rey lifted the paper out of the envelope, impressed by the golden cardstock with dark black writing. She read the invitation aloud.

“On behalf of Maz Kanata and the Takodana Corporation, we hereby invite Kylo Ren and one guest to the thirtieth annual Halloween Masquerade Ball at the Plaza Hotel in New York City on Halloween Night. Costumes are mandatory.” There were other instructions on responding to the invitation as she read through it once more. Kylo Ren and a guest? She looked up at him and realized why he was in such a panic.

“Oh yeah?” She raised an eyebrow at him and he was not amused with her blase attitude.

“Yes, Miss Jackson. Do you realize what this means?”

She shrugged. “We get to go to a Halloween party?”

“It is not a mere Halloween party,” he spit out the word Halloween as if it were venom. Rey remembered his distaste for the holiday. “Maz Kanata is one of the most powerful heads of the Takodana corporation. I was in London with her and Snoke, negotiating the most recent trade agreement.”

“She obviously thought you did a good job if she invited you,” Rey still didn’t know why Ren was so strung up over something so trivial as a party. She had missed out on tacos for this? “What’s the big deal?”

“The big deal is that Kanata is also one of the world’s top socialites. New York, London, Los Angeles. She has rubbed elbows with the upper class for decades, and only invites the titans of society to these events.” His tone darkened. “Think cameras, interviewers, a red carpet, people demanding you pose and preen for them at every moment of the evening.” Rey’s eyes widened as she started to understand the scope of the event. “The details of her parties are dissected and discussed at length in every entertainment outlet around the world. To refuse an invitation is tantamount to social suicide and she has invited me personally.”

Now even Rey was starting to get nervous. “What are we going to do?”

“We must attend, Miss Jackson,” he did not look happy to admit this. “It is next Wednesday, which means we have a week to prepare our costumes and fit in all of our lessons.”

“What do you mean?” She wondered how their silly cooking lessons would help them get ready for mingling with the upper echelons of Manhattan.

“It’s a ball, Miss Jackson,” his eyes grew dark as they narrowed. “We will be expected to dance.”

“Dance?” Besides some goofy moments of silly moves with her friends, Rey had never danced before in her life. Now Rey was starting to panic as she thought about the amount of publicity that would be at the event. If she made a fool of herself the entire world would know.

“Yes, Miss Jackson. I’m in the midsts of trying to find someone who could help us. I must admit, I’m coming up short on options.” His body language shifted as he sighed deeply. This revelation was obviously taking a toll on him when he was supposed to be relaxing. “There is something else I would like to discuss about this ball.”

“What’s the matter?”

“While you and I have attended events together before, they were mostly informal, and were connected to personal acquaintances. You’ve never been to such a high profile event and there is something that’s bothering me about it.” He bit his lip, deep in thought. “When I started my business career I changed my name. There were many reasons behind it, which I won’t go into now,” he trailed off for a moment before refocusing. “But to be honest, it’s been beneficial. While Kylo Ren is known in cities around the world, Ben Solo can still be an anonymous person. I think we should apply that idea to you.”

“You want me to change my name?” She asked incredulously.

“Just for when we go out as benefactor and protegee. You are still young, Rey,” he moved forward to cup her face in his hand gently, the first act of affection she’d received since he’d summoned her here. “I’m afraid of exposing you to the world in such a way. By going by a different name, you can still remain anonymous and continue your life without such intrusion. I had always meant to present you to the public as my protegee but I must admit, this is way sooner than I had ever expected.”

Rey nodded, understanding where he was coming from. It was a way for him to protect her from the big wide world she had been thrown into while still remaining a regular anonymous college student.

“Alright, I’ll do it.”

“I was thinking,” his face erupted in a vibrant blush as he coughed and turned away from her. “Since you are my protegee and I am your benefactor, I thought you could use my chosen last name as a sign of loyalty and solidarity. Your first name can be of your own design, of course.” A similar blush erupted on Rey’s face too, the thrill of them sharing a name sending fireworks through her body. 

“I like that,” she replied shyly, trying to think of a name that could match her protegee persona. It had to be strong, like Kylo was, and it had to match well with the name Ren. It took her a few more moments to come up with something she liked.

“Kira,” she nodded. “Kira Ren.” A wave of something overwhelming washed over her when she said her new chosen name. By the look in Mr. Ren’s eyes, she was pretty sure he had felt the same thing when she said it.

“Kira Ren,” he stepped as close as he could to her, tilting her chin up to look in his eyes. The swirling emotions she saw there left her feeling weak in the knees. “Yes, that will do quite well.”

“Can you finally kiss me now?” She teased as she leaned into him. “If you’re done having a tantrum.”

“I do not have tantrums, Miss Jackson,” his lips were almost on hers. 

“Yes you do,” she argued weakly before he kissed her, instantly forgetting what they were talking about as he swept her away in a wave of feeling. His lips were insistent and urgent as his arms came around her tightly, holding her close as they swayed in the other’s embrace. He led her to the couch with their lips still attached, pulling her down onto his lap as her knees struggled to balance her weight on his lap and the leather sofa. She fell against him, lips messy as their kiss gained intensity. It felt like his kisses were making her light headed when she finally realized she needed to breathe.

He rubbed her back, attaching his mouth to her neck as he trailed kisses down it, her back arching as a gasp escaped her. She ran her hands through his hair, holding his mouth against her skin as his lips left wet marks in their wake.

“I guess I picked a good name,” she hummed appreciatively.

“Yes, Miss Kira,” he purred against her skin and her hips arched forward, wanting to be as close as their bodies would allow. Her chosen name on his lips sounded both heavenly and sinful as she craved for more. “A very good name indeed.”

He kissed her neck for some more before moving back to her lips, holding her and making her body erupt in every place he touched her. She would have been content to continue this at length, but Ren’s cell phone began to ring, making him pull away with an angry groan.

“Who is it?” He grit through a clenched jaw, tenderly placing her on the cushions while he got up and grabbed his phone. He took it into the other room for a moment, talking in hushed, hurried tones. When he returned several minutes later, there was a look of pure resolve on his face. His stubborn jaw was set in determination.

“It’s settled,” he dropped the phone on the counter and rejoined her on the couch, placing her back on his lap as she placed her hands on his chest, loving the way his muscles felt under her fingers. 

“What’s settled?”

“Our first dancing lesson will be tomorrow, along with the fitting for your costume.” Her eyes perked up at the news.

“You found someone to teach us?”

“Yes, for no small sum of money. Our teacher is a retired dancer and would only help with fiscal incentive.”

She tilted her head. “Who is it?”

“Miss Ventress will be teaching us the basic steps. It will make measuring you for your costume quite easy.”

“Ventress?” Rey knew that the lithe, elegant woman had a dancer’s body, but the revelation was still a shock. “I didn’t know she was a dancer.”

“Yes, well, you know I am not quick to trust new people and my only options were her, Phasma or my mother. I thought I chose the best option.”

“Yes, I’m sure,” she agreed with a small laugh. Phasma would probably spend the lesson teasing them and Leia would probably spend it crying tears of joy. “I’m in.” A question made her pause. “What will our costumes be?”

“Well that,” he wrapped his arms around her again, his hands almost trailing down to her behind as she took a breath in anticipation. “Is a surprise, Miss Jackson. If I am to be forced into this evening, I might as well take some steps to enjoy it. I am choosing one for you.”

“Okay,” she agreed, feeling excited that he was taking care of her in such a way. Even if she were to choose a costume, she didn’t know of anything that would be worthy of such an event. She leaned down and gave him a soft kiss, loving the way it felt when she initiated it, feeling his lips reach for hers. “I trust you.”

“Excellent.” He held on to her as he grabbed the remote. “What would you like for dinner?”

She plopped on to the seat next to him, sitting back while he put on Stranger Things. “Tacos!”

Rey couldn’t stay for too long after they ordered Mexican because she had a class the next morning, but at least she had an entire week of dancing lessons with Mr. Ren to look forward to. While she wasn’t sure if she possessed any latent dancing skills, she was hopeful that with a little bit of practice, she and Ren would be able to handle it.

They were not able to handle it.

“Once again, Mr. Ren,” Ventress sighed with a shake of her head. “And try to make sure Miss Jackson still has all of her toes left by the end of the evening.”

They had been practicing for a little over an hour and Rey was pretty sure she was going to have a limp by the time they were done. Everything about their lesson had been horrible from the very beginning. They possessed no grace, no rhythm, and could barely even complete an entire movement without stomping over the other’s foot. They definitely had their work cut out for them as they continued with the lesson slowly, Ventress pointing out all of their flaws as classical music pumped through the emptied workroom. It was taking a monumental effort on both their parts to listen to Ventress’ criticism without wanting to scream and stomp off. 

Rey was in a foul mood, and she could tell Ren was as well. Ventress was trying to be professional, but even Rey could see that she was losing her patience. At least Ren was paying her well. Rey had already been measured for her costume, but she still had no idea what it was. All that had been brought out for her to try on was a shapeless lump of light blue fabric.

“This is absurd,” Ren grit through clenched teeth as they tried once more to complete what should have been a very simple maneuver. She tripped over her own foot and crashed into his chest grabbing onto his shirt as he tried to hold her up. 

“I know,” Rey grumbled. “But we have to figure something out, Mr. Ren, or else we’ll be humiliated.” Her fingers grabbed onto his shirt and clenched, holding his tightly as nervousness began to set it. Ren looked down at her with a deep frown before turning to Ventress. 

“Leave us for a moment,” he demanded, waiting for Ventress to enter the front of her shop before he turned back towards Rey with that soft, tender expression he used only with her. “I want to try something.”

She nodded. “Alright.” He reached for her waist again, and with the two of them alone together it sent sparks shooting straight up her spine when he touched her. Rey let out a small gasp when he took her hand and pulled her in close, pressing her up against the hard planes of his body. He looked down at her with darkened eyes as his voice rumbled around her.

“Let’s take this slow,” he whispered to her, even though there was no one else around. “I refuse to believe we are bad at this.”

“O-okay,” she replied shakily, still feeling self-conscious as she looked down at their feet. 

“Look up, Miss Jackson,” he ordered, her head snapping up to meet his gaze once more. “Look here. Nowhere else.”

“Yes, Mr. Ren,” she took a deep breath as her hazel eyes stayed fixed on the swirling browns of his own. The music was still playing and he waited for the downbeat to start moving them around, trying his best to take the lead. She felt incredibly awkward and her feet were landing about a half a second later than his, but eventually they caught up as they made a mockery of a simple four-step.

Her face lit up with happiness. They were dancing!

“We’re doing it!” Rey laughed, even though she was still basically tripping over herself. 

“It seems so.” Not many people would actually call what they were doing dancing, but it was better than whatever they’d been doing before. “This is only one movement though. There are many others we must at least attempt to try.”

“It’s a start at least,” Rey’s shoe skidded against the floor, causing her to wince. “Maybe we should ask Ventress back so she could show us more.”

Ren sniffed imperiously. “It’s better when we’re alone.”

“Yes, it is, isn’t it?” She agreed, causing him to lift up his lips in a half-smile, the first show of merriment she had seen in hours. “But we can’t figure this out by ourselves. We need her to at least show us the moves first.”

“I concur,” he nodded. “She can show us the moves tonight,” his entire demeanor shifted to flirtatious and she was not ready for the crooked grin he flashed her way. It almost made her trip again as she struggled to stay balanced. “And then we can practice alone until Wednesday.”

“Y-yes,” she stuttered, her mouth suddenly dry. “I’m busy on Thursday and Friday, though.” He was well aware of her work and class schedules at this point and nodded his head in understanding. 

“Then we will only have the weekend to prepare,” he looked nervous for a moment. “I have to return to work on Monday and who knows what Snoke has in store for me. I’ll have to work non-stop just to make sure we have Wednesday night off.”

Rey sympathized with him, sharing that same dread with him as she thought about his short, but needed, break from work. He had been so relaxed this week, even with his temper tantrums and moods, and was loathe to see him return to a place that worked him to the point of frustration. Part of Rey wished that his vacation would never end as they continued to dance clumsily around the converted work space.

“Do you,” her heart thrilled just thinking about her next question. “Do you want me to stay over on Saturday?” His pupils dilated quickly, the blacks almost swallowing up the browns of his eyes as his voice roughened like gravel. 

“Yes,” he urged. “Yes I do.”

Very little needed to be said after that as they were locked in each other’s heated gazes. Ren called Ventress back in and the couple tried to absorb as much as they could from the retired dancer. While Ventress was impressed that they had managed a few basic steps on their own, she still felt nowhere near confident enough of their skills as Wednesday loomed over them like the blade of a guillotine.

“Come by on Saturday morning. I’ll give you two hours of some final instruction, then you’re on your own. I still need time to finish both your costumes.”

“Thank you, Ventress.” 

While the nerves were beginning to set in, at least Rey knew that Ren was in the same position as her as she considered the monumental struggle ahead of them. Their upcoming weekend together softened the blow as she tried to focus on that instead. 

“Good luck,” Ventress turned away, muttering under her breath as she disappeared behind the curtain. “You’re gonna need it.”

“Yes,” Ren muttered darkly, grabbing Rey’s hand with a squeeze. “I do believe we will.”


	18. Schedules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been commenting and loving on my story! I'm a teacher and school starts next week, so I will not be updating as often I had been over the past month. I'll try to pump out 1-2 chapters a week, but I can't make any promises as of right now.
> 
> Also, please note that I have upped the rating of this fic. I hope it does it for all you patiently thirsty Reylos out there.

Saturday morning dawned cold and dreary as Rey’s sleep was rudely interrupted by her cell phone. A low groan escaped her and she could even hear Rose grumbling from across the room as the ring tone blared noisily. Her head lifted high enough off of her pillow to read that it wasn’t even 8am, and Rey believed it should be illegal to call someone this early on the weekends as she hesitantly picked it up. She already knew who it was on the other line anyway.

“Hey,” she yawned deeply, her face melting back into the pillow as she tried to keep her eyes open.

The unflappable voice of Kylo Ren could be heard, sounding unfazed by the early hour. “What time will you be presentable?” Was his gruff greeting. No “hello,” no “how did you sleep?” No actual greeting of any kind.

“I wonder if all boyfriends are as sweet to their girlfriends as you are?” She grumbled as she tossed her blankets off in her toasty warm dorm room. The school had started turning on the heat now that the late October chill was settling in the air. Mr. Ren’s lack of a response informed her of the bitter mood he was already in. Neither of them were looking forward to this afternoon and the monumental work it would entail. “Give me a half an hour, please? I worked late last night.”

“You get exactly thirty minutes, Miss Jackson, not a minute more. This is vexing enough without having to delay the inevitable,” he replied, sounding annoyed before his voice suddenly softened. “And don’t forget to pack a bag.” The command made her insides quake with anticipation as she thought about the light at the end of the tunnel. She would have to endure hours worth of dance practice, but it would all be worth it in the end when she was cuddled up next to him.

Rey was staying over Mr. Ren’s house tonight. And while this wasn’t the first time she was sharing a bed with him, it would be the first time that they were doing it as boyfriend and girlfriend.

Which made things infinitely more exciting. 

“I-I won’t,” she stuttered, feeling a flash of heat strike through her as thousands of wishful thoughts entered her mind. Rey shelved them all in the back of her mind for later tonight. “I hope we’re getting something to eat first,” she complained while Rose covered her head with her blanket to block out the noise and light. 

“Of course, Miss Jackson. I will see you shortly. Dress comfortably and don’t forget the bag.”

“Yes, sir.” She did a mock salute even though he couldn’t see her. The empty sound on the other end informed her that he had hung up on her once more. 

She chewed on the edge of her lip, wondering what the weekend ahead of them would bring. These were Ren’s final days of vacation, and it was bad enough he had to spend them doing something they both loathed. That was another reason why she was so excited for tonight. Once they got their work done and felt more comfortable with the dancing, they could use the rest of the night however they wanted.

Because while kissing was the most wonderful, beautiful, sensual experience of her life, Rey knew deep down that she was ready for more. They were taking it slow, and she was grateful for it, but she secretly hoped that Mr. Ren was also ready as she reflected on her shy, yet attentive, boyfriend. His moods shifted like the wind, and she never knew which version of him would rear it’s very attractive head, but Rey was unfazed by his mood swings and ready to take this next leap with him. Every time he looked at her, held her, kissed her, he made her feel like the most precious being on the planet. On any planet. 

She wanted to make him feel that way too. Because he was quickly becoming the most precious person to her in the entire Milky Way galaxy and her heart wasn’t used to feeling so much joy. 

Right now, however, joy was the last thing she was experiencing as she trudged to the bathroom to prepare for the day ahead. Her toes still hurt from their lesson on Wednesday and she hoped that Mr. Ren had absorbed the majority of Ventress’ instruction so it wouldn’t happen again. She quickly brushed her teeth and gathered enough belongings in her room to stay overnight. Rose sleepily poked her head up, her keen observational skills picking up on Rey’s every movement.

“Going somewhere?” Her roommate sounded like she was housing frogs in her throat as Rey smiled awkwardly. She would have preferred it if Rose hadn’t said anything, already feeling nervous enough about the next 36 hours.

“Yeah,” Rey said flippantly. “I’m staying with Ben this weekend. I’ll be home tomorrow night.”

That got her roommate up fast, the blankets thrown haphazardly on her bed as she sat up in alarm. Her eyes were still half closed and crusted with sleep, but fully alert. “For real?” Rose coughed, loosening up her voice. “You’re staying over at Ben’s place?”

Rey couldn’t confess that this wasn’t the first time, so she nodded shyly and hoped that Rose would drop it. Rey should have known better than to wish for the impossible. “Yes,” she tried not to let her voice shake and betray her nervousness. “We have something planned this week and we have work to do.”

Her head tilted in confusion. “I thought you said he was a business major.”

“It’s not homework,” Rey folded up some pajamas and stuffed them in the bag. “We’re going to a halloween party this week. We have to work on our costumes.”

“Oh, a costume party? I want to go!” Rose clapped and Rey had to find a way to get out of yet another set of spiraling lies. 

“It’s up in Chappequa, at his parent’s house,” she blurted quickly. “It’s going to be a bunch of stuffy old people. We’ll be the youngest ones there.”

Rose frowned, then her face instantly brightened once more. “You mean you’re going to meet his parents?!” Her voice became louder and more screeching with every word until Rey was sure the entire floor was now up at the crack of day. “REY!”

Rey rushed to cover Rose’s mouth so she couldn’t be heard on the moon. “Rose, Rose, stop screaming!”

“I can’t! This is wonderful!” Rose was still speaking, despite Rey’s hand covering her mouth as she slobbered all over her. “You’ve been dating for only a week and you’re already meeting his parents?”

Rey rolled her eyes, trying to sound nonchalant so Rose would stop making such a big deal over what Rey perceived to be a minor milestone at best. “Rose, I’ve already met them.”

Her roommate froze, and for a moment Rey thought she had cut off her friend’s air as she pulled her hand away and wiped it on Rose’s sheets. The girl seemed to be frozen in shock as she stared up at her taller roommate. 

“You met his parents?” She echoed. “And you weren’t even dating yet?”

“Yeah,” she shook her head, not understanding why Rose was acting so bizarre. “So what?”

“So,” Rose repeated incredulously. “That boy is in love with you.”

Rey scoffed loudly, looking at her friend like she was insane. “You’re ridiculous. Just because I met his parents does not mean that Ben loves me.” Rey finished packing her bag and pulled it over her shoulder, her heart making a painful twang in her chest. 

“Um, yes it does,” Rose stood in front of the door, blocking Rey’s exit. There was a determination in her gaze that Rey rarely ever saw in the spunky, diminutive girl. “And if he’s not in love with you yet, he’s more than halfway there. I saw the way he was looking at you last weekend, Rey. And I think you’re the crazy one if you’re not seeing it every time you look at him.”

Rey sighed, balancing the bag on her shoulder as she took in Rose’s words with a tremulous hope. There were moments when he looked at her and she thought that she felt loved, but honestly, how was she to know? No one had ever loved her before, no one had even wanted to keep her around. The fact that Mr. Ren enjoyed her company was a gift in and of itself, let alone the idea that he might one day love her.

Rey was certain about a few things, though. Mr. Ren cared for her, and took better care of her than any guardian had throughout her entire life. He kissed her and held her and made her feel the most precious, amazing things. For right now, that was enough for Rey. She wouldn’t be even more selfish and ask for love as well when she had already been gifted with such a bounty of riches. 

“We really care about each other, Rose. Everything about our relationship is very new, I can’t even think about love yet.”

Rose frowned and pulled her roommate in for a hug. Rey balanced the bag on her shoulder while she wrapped her arms around the shorter girl. “I get it, Rey. I’m just so happy for you. I want you to have a wonderful weekend with Ben, and whatever happens, just be safe.” Her head perked up. “Oh!” Rose ran over to her bedside dresser and pulled out a handful of foil wrapped condoms, shoving them into Rey’s hands. “Take these! They’re condoms for her pleasure. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want in bed!”

“Rose!” Rey was so overwhelmed with the influx of unnecessary condoms that all she could do was shove them in her bag with a crimson blush. “I guarantee that these will not be used this weekend.”

“Save them, then. You never know what could happen.” With a wiggle of her eyebrows, Rose ushered Rey out of the door in a flurry of movement. Rey couldn’t believe that their conversation and subsequent condom exchange had actually happened as Mr. Rook pulled up behind Hoth Hall with a very familiar grumpy backseat passenger. He didn’t even exit the car to greet her in his normal fashion, his mood was so sour. The broad-shouldered man simply scooted over, allowing her the room to sit down and get comfortable as they headed into town for breakfast. He was reading the paper, his glasses low on his nose as he studied the stock numbers from the previous day.

Some girlfriends might get greeted with a kiss or a snuggle, others get ignored for the New York Times. 

“A little light reading this morning, Mr. Ren?” His answer was a noncommittal hum.

“I return to work on Monday, Miss Jackson. To say I have much to catch up on is a gross understatement.” After a few more negligent moments, he peeked up at her over his glasses, his mouth turned up in a smirk. “Come here,” was his low and steady command. 

She preened at his attention and leaned over, his head ducking and securing her mouth in a firm, but insistent kiss. “Good morning,” he rumbled gently. 

“Good morning,” she repeated sweetly, rubbing his shoulder to ease some of the tension she felt there. He was dressed casual for their lesson in dark jeans, black loafers, and a black polo shirt. He seemed to relax at her gentle ministrations as she scooted next to him on her knees and kept rubbing his back. “You seem very tense, Ben.” At the sound of his name the man visibly deflated, as if hearing it let all of the fight out of him as his face fell.

“I got a series of emails this morning from Snoke and Hux, outlining everything that I’d missed over the past week of my leave,” he let out a deep sigh and leaned forward, allowing Rey more surface area to soothe as her hands moved in gentle circles around the expanse of his back. His voice was low as he hung his head in his hands, confessing to her. “I don’t want to go back.”

The pressure of her hands increased, wishing she could massage away all of his stress and frustration with a simple touch. The knots in his muscles felt like boulders and she wished there was something she could actually do to help him. He seemed to be enjoying her touches, however, so she continued.

“I don’t want you to go back either,” she admitted softly. When he looked up at her again his eyes were swirling with hesitance and fear. “You’re not the same when you’re around Snoke. You know it’s true.” He looked apologetic, but she wouldn’t allow him to say anything as she interrupted him. “I just don’t see how you can be happy there.”

He sighed deeply, shaking his head. “I was happy there,” his eyes narrowed. “No, what’s worse is that I’m still happy there sometimes. The competitiveness, the high-stakes, the money and the prestige. Sometimes I can’t see myself working anywhere else, and sometimes I can’t see myself sitting through another day.” He sounded miserable as he leaned into her touch. “I don’t know what to do. I keep thinking that I’ll wait it out until Snoke leaves, then at least the company will be mine and I can run it however I want.”

“How long do you think it will take?” She wondered aloud. “Before Snoke retires?”

“I don’t know. It could be next month, it could be next year.” He shook his head. “I hope it’s soon though,” his tone started becoming more and more impassioned as he continued to speak. “I have so many ideas on where to take the company next. Once Snoke is gone and I have control, I can make the First Order into the business I know it could be. I will have the power to unlock its full potential and bring it to heights that the business world has only ever dreamed.” 

Rey was still rubbing his shoulders gently, feeling a bit unsure about the ambitious look in his eyes. He said he didn’t want to go back to work, but then lost himself in his grand plans for the future of his company. He was still just as divisive as ever as she finished her mini-massage and pulled away from the feeling of his muscles under her fingertips. They had stopped in front of a breakfast bistro and Rey was absolutely ravenous, but right now it wasn’t only for food.

“That felt nice,” he confessed to her as Ren helped her out of the car.

“Yes,” she nodded with a blush. “I liked it too.” Discovering those little moments of affection were bliss, and one of Rey’s favorite parts about being in a relationship with Mr. Ren. Neither of them were used to giving, or receiving it, so it made every new experience that much more special.

They ate a quick breakfast, where Ren had to admonish her several times for trying to eat too much, too quickly. He tried to warn her that she would get ill if she danced on a full stomach, which was logical but not what Rey wanted to hear. She sipped her tea slowly and put down the other pastry she had been reaching for when she felt his eyes on her once more. His gaze was a curious mix of serious and playful as she took in his haughty demeanor. He was telling her what to do and he enjoyed it. To be honest, she kind of enjoyed it too.

“We must set up a schedule for this weekend, Miss Jackson,” he informed her as they made the short trip to Ventress’ studio. She was nestled close to his side as his request, enjoying the feeling of his arm around her shoulder in a gesture of casual intimacy.

“Why?” She tilted her head in curiosity, peering up at him. “All we’re doing is dancing.”

“Ah, but that’s the point,” his pupils widened until she could no longer see brown. “We will not only be dancing tonight. I was hoping we could engage in activities that would be more pleasing to us both.” Her breath stuttered before stopping completely as her mouth went dry. At some point her jaw had dropped open and she had to shut it and start breathing again before she could respond.

“Yes, yes of course,” she gasped. “What did you have in mind?” Rey remembered the condoms in her bag and wondered if they would actually be put to use. 

“I have some ideas,” he teased wickedly, causing her face to erupt in a blush reminiscent of a ripe tomato. “But it will have to wait. We will have our lesson until noon. Then lunch until 1:30. Then we practice until 6. After that it’s dinner and free time for the rest of the evening.”

“Free time?” She echoed, her voice shrinking. 

“Yes,” he reached over with his free hand and grabbed the one that was lightly resting on his chest, his gaze only on her. “We can do whatever we want.”

“W-what about tomorrow?” The anticipation was building out of control and she just wanted to skip the dancing and jump to whatever the hell free time entailed. 

“It’s like today, but opposite. Tomorrow we will have a free morning, and practice late into the afternoon. I can’t practice all day tomorrow because I have to go back to work on Monday and need to get things done.”

Rey nodded, agreeing with the demands for his time as they balanced their tricky schedules. This would be their last chance to practice before Wednesday, and a few hours of dance practice was all that was separating them from international humiliation. The pressure was on as they entered the empty boutique and awaited instruction from Ventress, who was moving around furniture to create a more open space where they could practice. Rey looked at the clock and knew that the next two and a half hours would be nothing short of torturous as they began learning the steps for a second dance.

It was much better than their first lesson, and Rey felt that she was slowly becoming more confident as time moved forward. She still made far more mistakes than Mr. Ren, who seemed to have improved greatly over the past few days, way more than Rey had. It made her feel a bit suspicious as they reviewed the two dances they had learned. They didn’t expect to dance more than once, but Rey was happy for the extra knowledge as their first session of the day ended. For a moment she wished they weren’t being forced to dance and could actually view this as an enjoyable practice. She was starting to get the hang of it and was even beginning to like it.

“That was much better,” she said as they piled into the backseat of Rook’s towncar. The rain had begun to fall in earnest and there was a deep chill in the air with every gust of wind. “I felt much more comfortable.”

“Yes, as did I,” he agreed, pulling her around so her legs could drape over his lap. This was a new position for them and she was an instant fan of it as he started to give her calves a light squeeze. They were very sore from all the dancing and tripping, and she could not fathom a more relaxing feeling. It was heavenly as he started to knead the tired muscles of her legs. “I am less hesitant for Wednesday, but we still need to devote more time to the second dance.”

“I agree,” she nodded, before letting out a low moan as he hit a very achy spot above her ankle. His hands stilled.

“Did I hurt you?”

“No, the opposite in fact,” she hummed. “It felt wonderful.” His hands started moving again and she closed her eyes in bliss as she leaned against his shoulder. He was obviously trying to get her to make that sound again and she obliged him, stretching against him like a mewling cat and moaning when he hit just the right spot. She nuzzled her cheek against him as they pulled up in front of his building, giving him a lingering kiss on the cheek. 

“Thank you for that,” she whispered as he gazed down at her, and for a moment she saw what Rose had alluded to earlier in the day. That gentle, tender gaze of his, with all the swirling browns seeming like a maelstrom brewing in his eyes. “I like it when you take care of me.”

A short intake of breath and a drop of his lower lip was all she needed to see to know that her comment had hit home. He had asked her so many times to allow him to take care of her, to pay for things. She wanted him to know that she appreciated every way he took care of her, even if it was a short massage.

“You have no idea what it does to me to hear you say that,” Mr. Ren kissed her brow and reluctantly pulled her from his lap so they could enter the building for lunch and round two. He taught her an easy recipe for lunch, a grilled ham and cheese sandwich, and she reveled in the simplicity and domesticity of the moment as she tried not to burn his lunch. She was a better flipper than he had expected, but it was hard for her to gauge how long the bread needed to cook before it browned and one side was much darker than the other.

But she had done it, and her whooping surprise as she plated their food was met with a tight hug and a kiss that almost knocked her legs out from under her as he shared her enthusiasm. It was a good thing he was holding her as they quickly forgot about the food and got lost in each others arms for a few minutes. The sandwich was still good, but a little chewier than it should have been when they finally regained focus and detached from one another to eat. It was getting harder and harder to pull away from him as their tightly scheduled day continued.

After lunch was more practice, and more practice, and more practice, until she got to the point where she never wanted to hear classical music again. They had both worked up a sweat repeating the same movements over and over again, and she was getting frustrated that he was improving when she was stuck in a rut.

“How did you get so good?” She huffed, feeling annoyed after hour number three of straight practice. “I feel like dead weight in your arms sometimes, you’re basically just throwing me around the dance floor.”

Mr. Ren shrugged, looking away from her with a slight blush. “I had a lot of free time on my hands over the last few days, Miss Jackson. I made the most of it.”

“I knew it!” Just the image of Mr. Ren dancing alone in his apartment made her erupt in a fit of giggles. “You did practice!” His lips turned down in an angry pout.

“Do not mock me,” he grumbled, but there was no fire behind his words as she laughed in earnest. 

“I’m not mocking you at all,” she reassured him between laughs. “I think it’s quite adorable actually.”

“Adorable?” He both sounded and looked horrified. “Miss Jackson, no one has used that word to describe me since I was a child,” he looked thoughtful. “A very small, tiny child.”

This time it was her turn to frown. “That’s not true. There are plenty of things about you that are adorable.”

He scoffed bitterly, his voice harboring years of pain in just a few syllables. “Like what?”

Rey frowned, approaching him slowly as they rested in the living room. They had been dancing for hours, and there was a light sheen of sweat on their brows, but Rey didn’t care as she reached up and brushed some of his hair to the side.

“Your ears,” she said tenderly, allowing her fingers to trail along the shell to tuck some hair behind it. “The first time I saw you, you were still slicking your hair back, and it was one of the first things I noticed about you.” He was staring at her like he couldn’t believe she was standing so close to him as she continued. “And your nose,” she shot him a small smile. “I like how handsome and distinguished it makes you look,” she trailed off. “Like royalty.” He sucked in a breath and she watched as his pupils dilated. He must be liking the attention as he reached down and cupped the back of her head with a single hand as he pulled her in for a deep kiss. 

It was appreciated, yet unexpected as she released a little squeak before being silenced by Ren’s lips. Her body was crushed to his as his mouth ravaged hers, his kisses so rough and adamant she thought her lips would be bruised.

“I need you,” he whispered roughly, his voice as shattered as glass as he claimed her mouth once more. “I need you, Rey.” His arms grew tighter around her and his words sent sparks shooting through every nerve of her body. For the first time ever, he grabbed her by the ass and hauled her up onto him, and she quickly wrapped her arms and legs around him for purchase as he started to carry her toward his bedroom.

Rey gasped between kisses, his mouth attaching to her neck. “I thought we still had to practice.”

“Fuck practice,” he groaned, and everything about his language and demeanor was driving her wild. “Fuck dinners, and fuck schedules. I want you, and I want you now.”

“Ben,” she gasped as his hands trailed under her shirt, feeling her feverish skin. He placed her down on her side of the bed and crawled over her, towering over her as he stood on his knees and looked down at the prize on his bed.

For a moment, he really did look like an ancient king, preening down at the bounty of his prize with arrogance and dominance and power. The look in his eyes was sensual and arousing as he gazed at her, already feeling bare when she hadn’t yet started removing her clothes.

“Rey,” every part of her body was begging to be touched by the man in front of her. They were both virgins, and they had very little experience with sex, but they were ready to take the next step, whatever it was meant to be. “Take off your shirt,” he whispered softly in the dim lighting of his room. The grey, rainy weather only made it seem more dark as she shifted on the bed. “I want to see you.”

Rey nodded, her heart pounding as she sat up and started to pull off her shirt. She could feel his eyes on every inch of exposed skin as she reached behind to unclasp her bra. A sharp inhale of breath could be heard when she was fully exposed, and when she looked up to gauge his reaction, he was staring at her with an open mouth, his hair and eyes both wild.

“I know I’m not that big,” she went to cross her arms over her chest, but Ben would not allow it as he gently stopped her shy movements.

“No,” he shook his head, his voice rumbling. “No, Rey. You’re perfect.” He pulled her arms away and she allowed him to gaze to his heart’s content. “Can I touch you?”

He asked so softly she almost didn’t hear him. A soft smile pulled up her lips and she kissed him once more, grabbing his hand and bringing it to a single breast as their lips remained locked. They both released the same sigh when his hand came in contact with the sensitive skin, and the soft squeeze of flesh made her lips detach from his as her head fell back with pleasure.

“Ah!” She cried, never knowing how good it would feel just to have someone touch her breasts, let alone squeeze and caress it with such worship. He gently pushed her back onto the pillows and enjoyed his control of her body, rubbing her breasts and teasing the nipples into hark peaks of pleasure. He was just as fascinated with her body as he was deriving pleasure from it as his hips bucked against the bed, causing him to groan as well.

When his mouth attached to her nipple and suckled softly, her back arched from the bed with a ragged cry, her legs rubbing together as a deep, unyielding ache began in her core. He trailed his lips along each breast, giving them equal parts time and attention as she mewled and cried like a kitten. When he wasn’t caressing her breasts with his kisses and tongue, he was sucking on the pulse points of her neck, leaving little dark marks in his wake.

It was the kind of endless torture she wished would last forever. Ben seemed more than happy to devote his attention to her breasts and while she was loving every second of it, her control was beginning to slip. She wanted to make Ben feel good too. She wanted them to feel good together. 

“I want to touch you too,” she gasped as his mouth detached from her breast, his lips covered in saliva and his eyes completely blissed out.

“God,” he groaned, reaching down to unzip his pants. They were in such a rush to touch one another, neither of them were fully naked. “Please, Rey,” his voice sounded shattered as his head returned to her chest. “Please touch me.” He grabbed one of her hands and placed it down his boxers, and she could feel but not see his dick in her hands. The skin was hot and feverish, and felt taut and hard against her palm. She couldn’t see what she was doing because of their awkward position, but she knew he had to be enjoying it from the way his hips bucked into her hand. She squeezed him softly, not knowing how much pressure he needed, but was rewarded with a groan that sounded like it had been pulled out of the blackest of voids as his mouth continued in earnest.

“Rey,” she squeezed again and started to tug softly, watching his eyes roll back in his head as he stopped focusing on her breasts. “H-harder,” he begged, and she quickly obliged him, stroking him firmly at the odd angle she was in and hoping she was doing it right. He collapsed next to her and she shifted her hands so the angle would be better. He removed her hand for a moment so he could remove has pants and they made quite a pair on his bed. She was topless with pants on, he was pantless with a shirt on. 

“What do you want to do,” she asked softly, looking across from him as they both breathed deeply in different stages of undress.

“I want to keep touching you,” he whispered. “I want to make you come.”

Rey bit her lip, shaking her head. “I don’t think I’m ready for sex yet, Ben.”

He reached over and tucked some errant hair behind her ear. “Don’t worry, Rey. We don’t have to have sex, but I might explode if I don’t come soon.”

Her face erupted in a blush and she was hesitant to reveal her next secret. “I don’t think I’ve ever come before.”

He gazed at her incredulously, shock replacing the arousal in his gaze. “What?”

“I mean, I tried to before,” she hated talking about her lack of sexual experience to anyone, but at least she and Ben were on the same level of virginity. “But it never worked. I couldn’t do it myself.”

Everything about him turned serious, from the look of his eyes to the way he carried himself on the bed. He looked down at her with determination set in his jaw.

“Will you let me try?” He asked seriously, and she was at a loss for words as her lower lip trembled. 

“Yes,” she replied slowly, reaching down to pull off her jeans and panties. She tried not to let him see how her hands were shaking as she removed her clothing and laid naked on his bed. 

It took a moment for Ben to even blink, he was so transfixed with the sight in front of him. His gaze held a hint of incredulity, as if he couldn’t believe he actually had a naked girl on his bed, waiting for his touch. He reached down to remove the rest of his clothes as well, and the fact that they were both naked relieved some of the stress Rey had felt. 

Ben’s body looked like it was sculpted out of marble, with every muscle defined and firm as he laid down next to Rey and leaned over her body. She glanced down and finally saw what she had been holding earlier, wondering how she was able to wrap her hand around such a large appendage. He was definitely well-endowed if his six-foot-plus frame had anything to say about it.

“Tell me what feels good,” he whispered, and his lips pulled up in a rueful smile. “I’m new at this, too.”

“I trust you, Ben,” she looked at him and poured every ounce of affection into her gaze. “Please make me come.”

He reached over her, holding her softly as he kissed her lips like he was trying to steal the air right out of her lungs. The passion she felt in his caresses reignited the feelings from before as he reached down and cupped the mound between her legs, feeling the touch of another for the first time in her life. He slid a finger between the slit and she felt the friction against the sensitive skin, making sparks explode before her eyes.

“Ah! Ah!” She cried as he continued his gentle rubbing, focusing on the soft bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs. For a moment he pulled away, and she clawed at his skin, trying to get him to come back, but he hushed her gently.

“I want to try something,” he said, crawling between her legs and pulling them apart so he could look down at her. She had never felt so open or exposed in her entire life and she had to resist the urge to close her legs and shield her sacred place from view. But her need for release was more powerful than her need for modesty and she held her legs open, allowing him the full scope so he could see her and the overwhelming arousal she felt for him.

“You’re so beautiful,” he shook his head, looking down at her while her entire body erupted in a blush at his attention. “I want to touch you again.”

“Please,” her voice sounded broken when he finally started again, this time completely focused on the area between her legs as he slipped a long digit inside of her. Rey’s eyes bulged open and her entire body clenched around his finger, which felt good, but simply wasn’t enough.

“More,” she cried out, sighing in bliss when he slipped in another finger and crooked them upwards, reaching places that Rey didn’t even know were there. Every movement, every shift of his fingers created the sensations she had been chasing after her entire life. She moaned wantonly, rubbing her own breasts as she discovered what felt good under Ben’s care. She peeked up at him and there was a look of determination in his gaze that turned her on even more. He was dedicated to the task of getting her off and would not stop until he succeeded. It was enough to make her arousal peak even higher. 

There was too much sensory overload, so many new feelings, that she couldn’t stop the cresting wave of sudden pleasure that took her to heights she had never experienced before. Her body convulsed, grabbing onto Ben’s fingers in a wave of ecstasy that left her feeling boneless and spent as wave after wave of sensation carried her away in bliss.

It was over in moments, but it was the best feeling of her life as his movements began to slow down. She quickly became oversensitive and hissed painfully, reaching for his hand to remove it from her slowly. Her breathing was stilted and rushed, and her body was still humming with aftershocks, but she had never felt so alive before in her life. When she finally opened her eyes, Ben was staring at her with hope in his eyes and his dick in his hand, jerking himself off slowly as he licked his fingers.

“Ben,” she cried, quickly coming overwrought with emotion as she gazed up at the man who had given her so much. She held out her arms for him and he grabbed her, pulling her boneless body into his arms as he nestled her against him. She could feel his dick against her hip and it twitched valiantly as she held onto his shoulders and buried her head in his chest. “Thank you.”

“Did you feel good?” He asked her tenderly, stroking her hair back and holding her as if she were the most precious being on the planet. 

“Yes, God, yes,” she gasped, trying to get as close to him as their bodies allowed. She had never felt closer to anyone in her entire life and didn’t want to let him go. “I want to make you feel good too.” 

He didn’t deny her when she reached down between them, grabbing his dick in her hands once more as she reached up to lock his lips in a kiss. He was still just as hard and aching as earlier, and she could feel the tension coiling in his body with every pump of her hand. She was nestled in his lap, her hand pumping firmly, and she watched as his head tilted back in pleasure as every muscle tensed.

“Rey, Rey, I’m gonna,” he didn’t even finish his statement before his body jerked, and a warm fluid started dripping over her hand and pooling on the sheets. He let out a strangled groan that almost reignited her own ardor as she watched him come, his eyes rolling into the back of his head while his mouth opened in a reverent gasp. She memorized every tick and movement of his body, storing them into her memory to cherish forever as the first time she had made her boyfriend come. 

Well, they were still virgins, but at least they weren’t that virginal anymore as their breathing slowed down and they gradually dropped from the heights of their ecstacy. They were still holding each other, their bodies shaking from exertion, their feelings shaky and raw from the experience. They were sweaty and dirty and there were fluids everywhere, but Rey didn’t care one whit as she leaned in and nuzzled Ben’s nose. His returning smile was so bright, so wide, that for a moment she lost herself in the simple joy she rarely ever saw in his eyes as he held her. 

“Let’s take a shower,” he whispered, and she joined him in his wild grinning as he picked her up off the bed and carried her towards the bathroom. Now that they had seen each other naked once, it seemed as if all modesty between them was gone as he plopped her next to him to fiddle with the overhead controls. “We must prepare for the next round of practice.”

Rey pouted, her good mood deflating like a popped balloon as they both stepped in to the steaming hot water. “What about everything you said before? The whole ‘fuck schedules’ thing?”

The arrogance he displayed next made her want to slap him. “Well we both got off, now we have to get back to business.” She threw a bottle of shampoo at him and their laughter echoed off of the marble walls of his bathroom for minutes afterwards as the couple crossed another milestone off of their list and showered together for the first time.

They practiced for another hour afterward, then ate a late dinner and passed out shortly after finishing season one of Stranger Things. When she woke up next to him the following morning, his hands were already on her body, rubbing and teasing her into a frenzy the moment she woke up. Now that they had done this once, it now felt natural and easy to engage with him in this way. Every touch ignited her passions into a wildfire of emotion, and she expressed it in kind, taking him in hand and stroking until he was just as lost as she was.

This time, he reached over to pull off her sleeping pants, not even giving her a moment to process what was happening before his fingers were inside of her once more, pumping and exploring and building up more of the delicious friction she was beginning to crave from him.  
She could do nothing but lay back and allow him the freedom to touch her as he pleased. His strong, thick digits felt like heaven inside of her as he brought her to the heights of another orgasm, her keening voice calling out his name in the dark.

It didn’t take long for Ben to come after that, his dick already as hard as steel as she shoved her hands down his boxers and started to jerk him off. He was calling her name softly, like he was still stuck in a dream, and he didn’t care when he came in his pants with a loud shout and a clench of his jaw. She felt powerful when she watched him fall apart under her hands, and her confidence grew as she got used to touching him.

When the couple finally got up and got dressed, they ate a long, lazy brunch where Ben wouldn’t let Rey within a foot of the eggs. Rey was content to sip her tea and watch Ben take care of her food as time quickly slipped by them. They practiced for a good part of the afternoon before Ben had to call Rook and arrange a ride for Rey. He had to go back to work tomorrow, and there were many things he still needed to do.

“Good luck,” she held his hand as he walked her to the elevator, feeling closer to him than ever before. Their moments of intimacy were precious to her, and it seemed to open up another facet of Ben’s personality as he gazed at her seductively. She could never remember him being so forward with his needs before, and now he gazed at her like she was a snack that he was ready to eat. “Please call me if things get too stressful at work.”

“I will. I hope to hear from you tomorrow, regardless.” The facade of Mr. Ren was slowly dropping back into place as their weekend finally came to a close. His language was becoming more formal, he was acting more distant, and the joyful boy known as Ben was slowly fading away once more. 

“I’ll call, Mr. Ren. I promise.” The elevator dinged behind her and she knew it was time to go. She stood on her tiptoes and puckered her lips, and he leaned down to meet her in a very chaste kiss, so incredibly different from the passionate ones they had shared before. “I’ll see you on Wednesday.”

Mr. Ren didn’t say anything else as she entered the elevator. He gazed at her like he was losing a limb when the doors closed, separating them and sealing their fate until Wednesday. They were about to embark on their most ambitious event yet and while they had practiced until their feet were basically crippled, she was still hesitant to attend Maz Kanata’s Masquerade Ball. No matter how many diamonds Ren bought her, or dresses he commissioned for her, she was still nothing more than an orphan girl from the streets of London. Rey didn’t know what to expect from the ball, but she had to hope for the best. 

The only thing that consoled her during the rainy drive back to campus was that she would be wearing a costume and a mask. They had even changed her name for her protection and anonymity. Rey could only hope it was enough as the event loomed on the horizon, far more frightening than the day it was meant to celebrate.


	19. A Royal Affair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The time has come for the ball and I've been singing Phantom of the Opera all day while writing this. Enjoy the Masquerade! Paper faces on parade, masquerade! Hide your face so the world can never find you!
> 
> Let me know if you guessed their costumes correctly (I've been dropping hints like crazy!)

Mr. Ren was the only thing on Rey’s mind as she sat through her Monday classes, wondering how he was faring at work now that his vacation was over. She sincerely hoped he wasn’t too stressed out or overwhelmed, especially since their big event was only days away. The masquerade ball was weighing heavily on Rey’s mind and she wondered if she was really ready for her moment in the spotlight. This was the kind of event that Rey had only ever dreamed of attending, and it had the potential to either be an overwhelming success or a horrifying failure. It was difficult for her to think of anything else.

Well, there was something else that occupied her thoughts throughout the day, and if she wasn’t thinking of Mr. Ren at work, then she was thinking about Mr. Ren in bed, and all the things they had done together over the weekend. Every time she reflected on their shared moments of passion it felt like the blush on her face betrayed her every thought. It was more sensual and beautiful than anything she had dreamed, and more intimate than she had ever imagined. They hadn’t even had sex and already she felt like she had reached highs she’d never felt before. She was anticipating their next leap, and wondering when she would be able to get her hands on him again.

Right now, the only thing they had planned for the week was the Masquerade Ball. Ren had claimed that he and Hux were on the outs again, which was a shame because she missed having another reason to spend time with Ren. It had been weeks since the two couples had dined together, and she hadn’t forgotten about her promise to help mend the fence between Hux and Ren. If only her boyfriend would behave at work as well as he behaved when they were alone.

Rey waited until after dinner to call Mr. Ren while Rose was taking a shower. She drummed her nails on the edge of her desk nervously, wondering which version of the man would pick up. Would it be the overworked, angry Kylo Ren? Or the sweet, sensitive Ben Solo?

She got her answer on the third ring. 

“Miss Jackson.” His voice was clipped and he sounded more than a little distracted. She glanced at the clock and knew it to be far past six, so she wondered if he was still at the office.

“Good evening, Mr. Ren,” she felt a tad disappointed at his monotone greeting, especially after everything they had shared the day before, but tried not to let it get to her. She should be used to his mood swings by now, and fought hard to tamper down her feelings as she tried to sound as professional as possible. That was always her default status wherever Mr. Ren was concerned. “I am calling to inquire upon your welfare. I have not heard from you and I wanted to see how your day was going.” He didn’t say anything, and she let out a deep breath that turned shaky at the end. “But if you’re too busy I can talk to you tomorrow.”

She could hear typing in the background, very fast typing, and he still didn’t say anything as she waited to be dismissed. Rey could tell that he was in no mood to talk and felt foolish for bothering him. She should have realized the pressure he was under now that he had returned to work. When he finally spoke, she thought he was talking to her.

“I need a few minutes,” she could hear a familiar voice mumble in the background and Ren spoke again. “Thanks, Hux.” It took a few beats, but a loud sigh could be heard, and the clipped tones of Mr. Ren were quickly replaced by the soft voice of the man who had called out her name in bed like a prayer.

“I am so glad you called,” he let out another deep breath and Rey smiled, thrilled to finally have his full attention even though he sounded exhausted. “I’ve been working on this deal with Hux for hours. There’s no end in sight.”

“On a scale of one to ten, with ten being the worst, how bad was your day?”

His voice was dark and deprecating. “About a twelve.”

“I’m sorry.” What else was there to say? She wished he didn’t have to go through it, but there was nothing she could do. “How late will you be staying?”

“I have no idea. Phasma already stopped by to bring Hux and me some dinner,” he groaned loudly. “I’ve had to sleep on the couch in my office before and tonight might be one of those nights.”

“I really hope it’s not,” Rey had to tamper down the slight bit of jealousy she felt that Phasma had brought her boyfriend dinner. Rey didn’t even know how to cook, but the simple thought of another woman providing something for him made everything inside of her recoil. “Please call me if you do get home so I know you’re at least sleeping comfortably.”

“That’s impossible,” his tone suddenly dropped as he laced it with a hint of seduction. “I could barely sleep at all last night. It’s not the same now that I know what it feels like to wake up next to you.”

Her breath hitched as she squeezed her legs together, remembering the way he had woken her up with the feeling of his fingers inside of her. “Ben,” she gasped.

“Rey,” his voice was full of longing. “The thoughts of you from this weekend are the only things that have kept me going today. Please know that.”

The sentiment brought an emotional tear to her eye as her chest filled up with warmth and another wonderful feeling that was utterly foreign yet felt totally right. “I do,” she nodded to no one in her room. “I’ve been thinking about you all day. I can’t wait to see you again.”

“I feel the same, Rey. I am sorry I won’t be able to stay on the phone long, but please know that you are never far from my thoughts.” She wished she could kiss the sadness away from his voice. “And please call me again tomorrow.”

“I will, Ben,” she said, trying to remind him of the pure soul that was being smothered by the demands of his job. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” She was expecting his normal hang-up, but he stunned her completely with his sweet and sentimental farewell.

“Goodnight, my Rey of light.” She could do nothing but gasp at his term of endearment before the call ended without a chance to respond. That warm, fuzzy feeling by her heart suddenly multiplied tenfold until it effused her very essence. She had to force herself to put down the phone and lose herself in homework so she didn’t waste the entire night daydreaming of their time together. Rey didn’t hear from Mr. Ren after that and despaired at the thought of him sleeping alone in his office without anyone to keep him company.

Her fears were confirmed the next day when she spoke to him after Taco Tuesday, stuffed with chili and guacamole and interrupting another late-night meeting. He was forced to call her back after his conference call, but at least she was relieved to hear that he was on his way home.

“Yes, yes, I’ll be sleeping in my own bed tonight,” he shooed away her worried questions brusquely. “I must be ready for the main event tomorrow, Miss Jackson. Halloween is a mere day away. I need my wits about me if we are to field off all the demons and monsters afoot.”

She giggled at his sarcasm. “I’ll be fine. I’m bringing my own monster to protect me.”

“Yes,” he almost purred at her. “I am at your service. A young miss like yourself could get eaten up alive in a big city like Manhattan.” The way he said it led her to believe that he wanted to be the first one to take a bite of her as she shivered in delight. She wasn’t used to this level of flirty banter with him and while they were still new at it, he seemed to be more proficient than she was as she stuttered awkwardly.

“Y-yes, well, you’ll have to stay close to me.” She shouldn’t feel so flustered when the man wasn’t even around. It was embarrassing. “To make sure no one steals me away.”

“Over my dead body,” he threatened, and for a moment she believed it. “I’ll have to make sure I don’t let you out of my sight.”

“Please don’t,” she said in all seriousness. “I’ve never even been to the city before. I have no idea where anything is.” She could tell he was disappointed from the clucking of his tongue.

“We will have to make that a lesson for another day, Miss Jackson. It is imperative that you know how to properly navigate Manhattan. You might have a job there one day.”

“Yeah right,” she scoffed lightly. Unless NASA planned on opening a branch up north, she highly doubted she would ever work in New York City. “But I should know how to get around. Put it on your list.”

“My list?” He repeated.

“Yes, the running tally of all the things you think I should know,” she commented sarcastically. “I’m pretty sure it’s a mile long by now.”

He huffed a small laugh, but didn’t deny it. “I’ll tack it on.”

“So what time do we start preparing?” She asked, changing the subject to the inevitable ball. “Is Rook picking me up?”

“Rook will pick you up at four, and I will be joining you shortly thereafter. You have much more makeup and preparation than I do.” Rey still had no idea what her costume was and she wasn’t going to ask. Surprises were so rare in her life that she didn’t want anything to ruin this one. “The event will run very late, and I doubt we will be leaving before midnight.”

Rey felt a surge of nervousness as she considered the timeline of their evening. Her afternoon class would be over at three, but her Thursday morning class started at ten. She hoped their night wouldn’t be too late as she considered her schedule. “Are you working on Thursday?”

“I must,” he clipped angrily. “I have already received enough grief for my vacation time. I refuse to bow and scrape for more.”

Rey felt such a blinding hatred for Mr. Ren’s boss that she had to take a moment and breathe before she could even speak again. The man drove Mr. Ren past the point of exhaustion and then berated him for taking the time to better himself? There were no words to express her disgust.

“You shouldn’t have to,” she agreed firmly. “I have an early class on Thursday, so we’re in the same boat.”

“Then it’s settled,” she could almost hear the grin in his tone. “We arrive fashionably late and make an early exit. Sounds like a plan to me.” Rey barked a short laugh.

“Do you want me to stay over?” she questioned as he took a sharp intake of breath. “I know we normally don’t during the week, but it is an event we have to get dressed for.” He hummed in appreciation of her logic.

“Yes, Miss Jackson, you are absolutely correct. I do believe you must sleep over.” His amusement melted into disappointment. “I’m sorry, but I must go. I have to call back Hong Kong as soon as I get home and we just pulled up.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow Mr. Ren,” she said, wondering if he would repeat the same sentiment as last night, but he ended the call as abruptly as he normally did. Now with something else to look forward to, she spent the rest of the night watching old horror movies on TV with Rose, dreaming about the surprise of her costume and another night spent in Mr. Ren’s bed.

The day of Halloween was brisk and cold, the perfect day for people to enjoy the fun of trick-or-treating. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky as people wore all kinds of costumes around campus, and a theatre group recreated horror stories on the Student Union pavillion as students entered the building for lunch. Rey tried to let the campus festivities distract her from the anxiety that crept up on her throughout the day as the event loomed closer and closer. By the time her final class ended, people were talking about the various parties and events that were happening in the area while Rey ducked back into her dorm room, trying to avoid running into anyone she knew as the time ticked closer and closer to four.

Luckily, Rose was still in class as she quickly loaded up her bag with pajamas and a change of clothes. Her toothbrush and charger went in last before making sure her room was tidy and her books were put away for tomorrow. Rook was as punctual as ever as she jogged up to their meeting place, and she was silent in the backseat as they made their way into town. The evening traffic was even worse than usual due to the presence of so many parades and people as they made their way into the heart of Corellia.

When Ventress ushered her into the back room of her boutique, Rey started looking around wildly for any sign of her costume, but the sage seamstress merely lifted her eyebrow in amusement as they stripped her and wrapped her in a robe. 

“Not yet, Miss Jackson. Mr. Ren wants to be here for the surprise.” Rey huffed her disappointment as she plopped into the makeup chair, crossing her arms over her chest as Ventress shot her assistants knowing looks. They must have already counseled her look as the women started working on her without muttering a single clue to one another. Rey simply closed her eyes and allowed the ladies to work their magic on her hair and face.

After an hour of makeup, where Rey thought she was caked in pounds of concealer on her face, neck, and chest, she finally felt someone working on her hair. It was pulled back behind a skullcap, and Rey knew that a wig must be involved as the ladies smoothed her hair down as far as it would go. Now that a wig was involved her imagination was really running wild as her patience was growing thin.

About a half an hour later, she heard a voice that made all of her anticipation and expectations explode out of her in an excited giggle. 

“Is she almost ready?”Mr. Ren stomped his way into the back and she had to fight to keep her eyes closed. Was he already dressed in his costume? Was it time to open her eyes?

“We were finalizing her hair before we bring out the wig. She has kept her eyes shut the entire time.”

“You hear that Mr. Ren?” She called out as her eyes stayed closed. “I’ve been very good. I hope my surprise is worth it.” She could hear his dark chuckle as his footsteps came closer, and she held her breath in anticipation as he came up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders. She was so nervous her hands were shaking and she had to clench the sleeves of her robe in her fist to stay calm. 

“Are you ready for your costume?” The voice in her ear was all Ben Solo as the veneer of Mr. Ren was stripped away by the secret of his surprise. 

“Yes,” she breathed excitedly. She couldn’t take it anymore, she had to look. “Can I open my eyes now?”

“Yes,” he crooned to her. “Now.”

When she opened her eyes, she did not recognize the woman in the mirror who was buried under so many layers of pale makeup. Her skin looked as white as porcelain as a rosy blush was painted on her cheeks. Soft, seductive eyes stared back at her, and a small black mole was painted on her upper lip, above a dark rouge lip color.

“Ren,” she gasped, still not knowing what her costume was. “What am I?” That was the moment when she looked up at her boyfriend and finally realized that he did not look like he belonged in this century.

He was dressed in a fine black suit, done in the style of the kings of old. His legs were clad in tight breeches that left little to the imagination as sturdy black boots reached up to his knee. His surcoat was tailored with blue silk, and the image of a dragon was inlaid in the center of his chest in the form of an elaborate crest. His hair was down, and fanning around his face in the most regal way as a giant golden crown rested upon his head. 

“You are my Queen, Lady Kira, of the House of Ren.” He pointed over to the mannequin that was standing behind him and she had to make sure she didn’t smudge her makeup as she stifled a gasp with her hand.

A power blue gown, made with more fabric than Rey had ever seen on one dress, was adorned with pearls and lace around the neckline and sweeping down the bodice in a detail unlike anything she had ever seen. The intricacy of the design was so unique, it looked like it had danced it’s way out of a history book as she took in the long train and the layers of fabric she would have to navigate. 

Mr. Ren leaned down to whisper in her ear as her eyes tried to follow the many swirling patterns on the bodice. “In the 18th century, many royals loved pastels. Pink, powder blue, sea green, and the like. The dyes were incredibly difficult to make, and incredibly expensive to produce and ship. Only royalty could afford the fabrics, and they showed it off whenever they could,” he started to kiss his way down her neck, her eyes fluttering closed and giving up on following the patterns. “Tonight you shall be my queen, Kira Ren. I am forever your faithful servant.” The way he was lavishing her with attention was driving her wild, and she could hear Ventress grumbling her distaste in the background.

“Stay clear from the makeup, Mr. Ren,” she nodded for her assistants to prepare the dress for Rey as Ren begrudgingly backed away from her. Rey was this close to pulling him back when Ventress grabbed her attention. “Miss Jackson, do you know what I call my seamstresses?”

“No,” she replied as she stood up to get dressed. 

“I call them the Nightsisters,” she claimed. “For their ability to complete even the most complicated garment in a single night.” Her eyes narrowed. “Do you know how many nights it took us to create this dress?” Rey shook her head, feeling curious herself. “Five,” Ventress emphasized with a puff of her lips. “Please return it in one piece.”

“It’s a masterpiece,” Ren commented on the dress as Rey turned around to remove her robe. “It looks like it just walked out of the Louvre.” Ren wasn’t one to give idle praise, and Ventress seemed to bloom under his words as her assistants helped Rey into the dress. There was a corset, but it wasn’t as cumbersome as Rey would have expected as they laced her into the garment. It was short-sleeved, and long white gloves matched the lace on the bodice. One of the Nightsisters kneeled down to help Rey slip on a pair of very reasonable and plain shoes that were beige and low-heeled. It was much better than the stilettoes she was used to wearing as Ventress commented on them.

“I refashioned an old pair of character shoes for you. I thought between the historical accuracy and the need for comfort they would work best.” The final piece of her costume was the giant wig that they brought out from the back room. It was a powdered wig that was curled and pinned up in an updo that made her as tall as Mr. Ren as she tried to balance the weight on her head. The ladies secured it with enough pins to outlast a tornado as she took in the complete look.

It was as if Rey were the ghost of a queen that had been dead for centuries as she took in her pale skin, powdered wig and blue ball gown. She was the picture of royalty as Ren stood behind her and placed a crystal tiara on her head, resting atop the wig as the assistants secured it tightly. With Mr. Ren standing to the side, they truly looked like a king and queen of ages past.

“Thank you, Ventress. For everything,” Rey said warmly as King Ren held an arm out for his queen to take. She thrilled at the feeling of his muscles under her fingertips and found it all too easy to slip into this ethereal fantasy of them as the spirit of Halloween was cast over her.

“I’ll be by your building tomorrow to pick up the garments,” she sniffed haughtily. “Be careful, the both of you.”

The royals ignored the scolding and left the boutique arm-in-arm as they headed out to their waiting chauffeur. Rey had to pick up her massive skirt and hold it as she entered the car, trying to smooth it out as best as possible with the massive amounts of fabric in her lap. Once they were alone in the privacy of the backseat, Mr. Ren turned to her with hungry eyes as they made their way into Manhattan.

“Good God, I wish I could kiss you right now,” his voice sounded like it was being scraped over gravel as she clucked her tongue at him playfully.

“No, no, no. You heard Ventress. My makeup must stay perfect and you would probably get white gunk all over your very handsome suit.” His eyes narrowed pointedly at her as she took in his tense body language.

“Does it look like I give a damn?” He growled, looking and sounding like an angry tyrant. It should not have turned her on as much as it did as she squirmed beneath the dress.

“No,” she reached for his hand and noticed that he was wearing a fake ring to match the crest on his costume. She kissed the deep blue stone that rested in the center as he sucked in a breath. “I’m finding it quite hard to keep my hands off of you as well.” She peeked up at him, her wig hitting the roof of the car with every movement as her grey curls bounced about. “But we must be good. There’s plenty of time to play with our costumes later, my liege. We must get through the night first.”

She watched as his jaw clenched, and he gripped the hand that was holding his tightly. ‘How right you are, my Queen.” He kissed her hand in return, his plush lips pressing firmly against her knuckles. “Your wisdom is only surpassed by your neverending beauty.”

“Well met, your highness.” She grinned at him, then dropped her voice to a whisper. “I really like these costumes, Ben. Thank you for my surprise.”

He kissed her hand again, the closest thing he could get to the real thing until the end of the night. “No matter what happens tonight Rey, you are a queen amongst these people. They are nothing, and you are everything. I wanted to make sure you remembered that as we enter the den of wolves.”

“I’m ready,” she assured him more than she assured herself as a pang of doubt still plagued her.

“And if all else fails, just follow my lead.” Rey nodded as she tried to sit as comfortable as possible in her giant dress and wig as they made their way over the bridge into Manhattan. 

Rey was more preoccupied with looking out the window at all the buildings, stores, and people than worrying about the impending party. She knew they were getting close when she saw the masses of photographers outside the venue, trying to get a look at all the guests who were trying to enter the famous hotel through the red carpet display out front. Limos and town cars littered the street while police barricades separated the people who hadn’t been invited. There was a bouncer taking names before the red carpet began, and Rey could already see the flashing lights on the other side of the partition.

“After you, My Lord,” she said as they pulled up to the curb. He passed her a face mask that matched the color of her dress, and helped her get it on over her wig. He slipped a black mask over his face as well. There was no way she was getting out of this car without help and he knew it as he shot her a smile before exiting the car. Since he wasn’t a famous celebrity, no one really paid much attention to him as he helped her get onto her feet, but as soon as she exited onto the hard Manhattan pavement, it felt like every single eye was on her as she felt suddenly grateful for the mask.

A chorus of “Who is she?” started to echo around her with every step she took. People were whispering around her, wondering if she was someone famous or important as she walked by. For a moment, Rey let every single insecurity she’d ever experienced crash over her, and she felt like the most unimportant person to ever walk the planet as she wondered what she as doing here. 

That was until she looked up at Ben, her King, her everything, staring down at her as if she were truly the Queen of the world. It made her forget all about the people around her and focus solely on the man who had already made this night magical. If she was going to survive this night, she had to do what he said and follow his lead.

Ren walked up to the bouncer and handed him the invitation, giving their names. “I am Kylo Ren, and this is my protegee Kira Ren.” Rey gave a slight bow in her dress and she could already feel the eyes of the photographers behind the bouncer as the red carpet stretched below her feet. Other people were ahead of her, already taking pictures and talking to reporters as she adopted the same air of indifference and superiority as her benefactor. She was supposed to be a queen, after all.

The bouncer called their names out to the press as they entered, and while there were some people being swamped by photographers, a fair amount of people were actually paying attention to them as pictures were snapped. She and Ren stood for some poses, with Ren’s arm held protectively around her shoulder as she stayed close to his side. He was basically scowling at them all while she tried to look as nonchalant as possible, as if she walked red carpets every single day of her life.

“Kira! Kira!” A member of the press called her over to ask some questions. Ren nodded at her to go, but stayed close to her side the entire time. “Who designed your dress?” The excited woman asked she shoved a microphone in Rey’s face. It had the name of some fancy magazine on it that she had never read before. “Who are you wearing?”

Rey cleared her throat, trying to sound like her benefactor as she spoke haughtily. “The designer is Asajj Ventress. She’s the only person I let touch my clothing.” Rey thought it sounded snobbish enough for high fashion and the woman looked impressed as she scribbled a few notes. Rey went to walk away, fixing her train behind herself so the fabric draped properly. People were snapping pictures of her from every angle as Ren lead her past more members of the press. Other guests were scattered around the red carpet as well, some she even recognized as she fielded off some more silly questions about her costume and hair. 

When they finally made it past the crush of the press and the security checkpoint, King Kylo and Queen Kira stared out at the party in front of them. People were dressed in all kinds of costumes, but in Rey’s opinion nothing looked as intricate and fine as their outfits as they joined the masses in their revelry. She tried not to make eye contact with anyone, too intimidated by the level of stardom that surrounded her. When she saw an actor from one of her favorite Marvel movies, she was glad to be wearing a mask as her face turned twelve shades of pink.

“Have you seen our host yet?” She asked him after about a half an hour of walking around and taking in the general splendor of the venue. The party was decorated in the fashion of the balls of centuries past, with dazzling chandeliers blinking orange and yellow lights to give the illusion of real fire. The waiters were dressed in the livery of butlers as they passed around champagne flutes and collected discarded glasses. For Rey and Ben, who were dressed as if they belonged to that era, the decor added another layer of fantasy to their evening as she truly felt like royalty. 

“No, but she tends to make her appearance after the cocktail hour,” he turned to her, and she was hypnotized by the mask that covered his face yet heightened the attraction she felt for him. “Would you like to dance?” He held out his hand for her to take and she loved the way her gloved hand slipped into his, like it belonged there.

They walked to the dance floor and waited for the song to end before a waltz began. Two people dressed as Tarzan and Jane, who were basically wearing nothing at all, left the dance floor and they took their place quickly before the next dance could begin. Rey could feel the eyes of the audience around her watching the couples as they started to dance, and some pictures were even being snapped by a private photographer in order to distribute to the press. The pressure was on as she tried not to trip in her shoes.

Thankfully, the character shoes that Ventress had given her were comfortable and balanced as her skirt hid any little mistake that she made during her attempts at dancing. King Kylo looked as lordly as ever as he led them across the dance floor, and he even picked her up in an exaggerated lift during one of the musical flourishes at the end of the song. She released a shaky laugh as they finished the dance, feeling like a true lady of the court as they bowed to one another slowly.

They were a bit breathless after that, and walked over to an empty alcove that was far away from the crowded dining area in the spacious hall. The music was a bit more muted from this distance, and she could hear their footsteps echo along the floor as they found a moment of privacy away from the cameras and people. He kissed her hand once more and grinned at her, the facade of the stoic king melting away like hot butter.

“I’m going to get us something to drink,” he stepped away from her as she sat gingerly on a stone bench. Her feet were already starting to kill her and the night had barely begun.

“Don’t leave me for too long,” she scolded gently, feeling apprehensive at his departure. “I don’t know anyone here and if I run into Bucky Barnes again I might pass out.”

“I’ll be right back,” he turned and left her alone while she rubbed her exposed arms, the silk gloves doing little to keep her warm. After about a minute of silence some footsteps could be heard behind her, and where she expected to find her boyfriend, she spotted a petite elderly black woman instead, approaching the bench with slow, achy steps.

Rey tilted her head slightly, the heavy wig stopping her movements from being too broad. What was an old woman doing at a party like this? She sat directly next to Rey, even though there were plenty of other benches for the woman to sit and have more space. She was short, almost shorter than Rose, and her curly pepper-gray hair was coiffed tightly to her head. She wore neither a mask or a costume, and her dark eyes were hidden behind glasses so thick Rey wondered if they were real.

“Hello,” Rey couldn’t bring herself to act like a rich snob as the woman smiled at her kindly, her face cracking with wrinkles. She was wearing a deep maroon dress with long sleeves, and seemed as if she was bored with the opulence that surrounded her.

“Hello, my sweet child,” the woman crooned gently and Rey felt instantly eased by this woman’s calming presence. “Are you enjoying yourself?” 

Rey shrugged, not knowing how to lie to the kind woman in front of her. “I’m a bit overwhelmed, to be honest. I’ve never been to an event like this before, but everything has been so lovely. It’s like a dream.”

 

The woman’s smile deepened, making her eyes sparkle. “What is your name, dear?”

“Rey Jackson,” she blurted without thinking, forgetting about her goal of anonymity for a moment. “I mean, my name is Kira Ren. I am Kylo Ren’s protegee.” The woman’s dark brown eyes lit up with enthusiasm.

“Ah, so you’re the guest,” she mused knowingly. “I was hoping I would get to meet the girl who pissed off Edmund so thoroughly. It was part of the reason why I invited Ren in the first place.” 

It took a moment for the woman’s comment to hit home but when it did, Rey could have died from embarrassment. There she stood in the presence of the ubiquitous Maz Kanata, talking to the woman as if she were nothing but a friendly stranger she’d met at the bus stop. This was the woman who had enough social status to crumble Ren’s reputation into dust and she had just given the woman her real name. 

“You mean,” she gulped audibly. “You’re. . .”

“Maz,” Ren returned then with a drink for Rey, passing it over as he bowed to their host. “It’s a pleasure to see you again.”

“Likewise, Ren,” one of the most powerful businesswomen in London looked at Rey as if she were a precious jewel. “I was just meeting your lovely guest, the Lady Kira. I take it she is the reason why Snoke was so angry with you during our negotiations?”

“Yes, quite,” he hummed flippantly, trying not to let the comment get to him as his jaw ticked with displeasure. “She is my protegee, Maz, and a very talented engineer. She has a bright future ahead of her.”

“Yes, indeed,” their host mused as she leaned in closer to Rey. There was nowhere for Rey to go, so she had to allow this intrusion of personal space as the woman leaned in close. “I see your eyes, child. And what I see is a woman who has not yet unlocked her potential, and has no idea how powerful she truly is.”

Rey sucked in a sharp breath, peeking up at Ren who was watching them with a critical gaze. Rey felt flustered under the woman’s comment. “I-um, thank you,” she stuttered. Maz turned back to Ren, tilting her head all the way back in order to look up at his massive height.

“Keep her around, Ren. She’s good for you,” the elderly woman patted Ren’s chest fondly as the man lightly coughed. Rey couldn’t read him as he donned his aloof mask under Maz’s attention. “And bring her to London the next time you come. She would make negotiations infinitely more interesting.”

It felt like a lightning bolt of panic shot through every molecule of her as Ren waved off Maz’s comment with a small smile. She would rather be caught dead than go back to London for any reason other than renewing her Visa, but Ben didn’t know that yet. “We shall see, Kanata.”

The woman got up from the bench slowly with a groan. “Whatever happens, you have a standing invitation to any party you like, my dear.” She pat Rey on the shoulder gently as she started to shuffle away. “And do make sure you read the Times tomorrow. My parties always make it into the Arts & Culture section.” With that, the woman left without even sparing a glance back at the couple. Rey was left feeling as if something incredibly significant had happened, but she had no idea what it was as the rest of the night stretched out in front of them. At least they already got the stressful parts out of the way.

“Ren,” she tugged at his sleeve and realized that he was still staring after their diminutive host. “What just happened?”

“I am not sure,” he replied, and she was not used to seeing him so ruffled as he lead her back towards the crowd. “But I am never leaving you alone at a party again.”


	20. Publicity

The glittering chandeliers soared above her and the twirling couples surrounded them both as Rey and Ren danced for the final time during Maz Kanata’s Masquerade ball. It was getting late as midnight quickly approached, and they both had things to do the next day that forced them to interrupt their revelry earlier than the other guests. There was still a long ride back to Corellia, and she was thoroughly planning on making Mr. Ren massage her feet and legs the entire car ride home as her ankles ached and her feet throbbed.

For some reason, it felt like a million eyes had been on Rey all night long, especially after her abrupt meeting with their kind yet curious host. King Kylo and Queen Kira had been a very popular couple throughout the night as random people came up to them to mingle and schmooze. King Kylo had been his normal taciturn self, but Rey had at least tried to be a little bit diplomatic and keep the conversation going. It was hard to put on the same aloof facade as Mr. Ren and still seem friendly, but she answered their questions as politely as possible and made it sound like she belonged in their world when it couldn’t have been farther from the truth. 

It also felt as if the private photographer had been hovering over their shoulders all night, snapping pictures of her and Ren in the most ridiculous and inopportune moments. Every time she looked over at the front dais, where Maz Kanata was now sitting surrounded by her entourage, the woman’s eyes were already on her, narrowed and calculating as if she was trying to solve a difficult puzzle. It was unsettling, and it made her stick to Ren’s side like glue for the rest of the night, too afraid to be separated from him again.

They had dined at a table with other businessmen that Ren was acquainted with, and she was stunned to see him actually engage in some friendly conversation with people who didn’t work at First Order. Sure, they still spoke about their respective businesses, but it was the kind of small talk that Ren usually avoided like the plague. The fact that he was actually socializing at his events, the entire reason why he had started to groom her as his protegee in the first place, filled Rey with the same glowing warmth that she’d been feeling for the past few days. It spread out from her heart, down her core, and all the way to the tips of her fingers and toes. It was such a wonderful, overwhelming emotion that it felt as if the happiness would simply burst out of her in a cascade of joy.

Now they were heading up to the dais to say their final goodbye to their host, who seemed to be waiting for their arrival. There were dozens of people surrounding her in a crush of money and influence, but the older woman’s eyes were solely on Rey.

“I must say that your costume is my personal favorite of the evening, Queen Kira,” some of the women surrounding Maz rolled their eyes or shared sneaky glances with one another, but Rey held her head high and nodded her thanks. “As is yours, King Ren. People like you know how to add gravitas to a costume party.”

Mr. Ren bowed to her, and Rey gave her a little curtsey. “The ball was exquisite. Thank you for your invitation, Maz. I shall be seeing you again within the next month.” The woman waved his gratitude away.

“Yes, yes. Round three of this never ending battle,” she huffed before turning to Rey again. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Kira. I do hope I will be seeing you again soon.” The petite woman was not the kind to take no for an answer, so Rey had no choice but to agree.

“Of course,” Rey said, feeling Ren’s hand tighten on hers. “You know how to contact me.”

“Have a wonderful night,” was their friendly dismissal, and Ren lead Rey out of the hotel and towards their rendezvous point with Rook, who was parked around the corner at a delivery dock. 

Her wig hadn’t moved an inch throughout the night, but the second she was ensconced in the backseat of the car she ripped the tiara and fake hair off of her head, scattering pins everywhere as she removed the skullcap and shook out her hair. She scooted over for Ren to fit in next to her giant skirt, and the second he sat down he immediately pulled her into his lap, attaching his mouth to hers in a kiss that practically seared her skin.

She didn’t even have time to gasp as he held her awkwardly, her body twisted within the skirt and fabric of the dress. The corset had been getting tighter and more uncomfortable as the night progressed and at this point it was more cumbersome than beautiful as she tried to messily make out with her boyfriend, whose kiss she hadn’t felt in days. He was ardent in his demands for more kisses, stealing the breath right from her lungs as she gasped against his mouth.

“Ren,” she cried plaintively as he kissed his way down the painted pale skin of her neck, attaching to her pulse points and sucking firmly. A wanton moan slipped from her lips as she tried to manipulate her twisted limbs closer to him, and she almost died from embarrassment when she remembered that they weren’t alone. “Ren, we can’t do this here,” she gasped.

“Why the hell not?” Was his grunted response from her skin. His hand cupped her breast over her corset and despite the thick fabric she still shuddered in delight.

“Rook is driving in the front seat, we’re not alone.” She could hear his annoyed groan as he reluctantly pulled away from her. The look he shot her was nothing short of ferocious.

“Do you know how hard it’s been keeping my hands off of you all night?” Some of her makeup had transferred to his face as well, a streak of red and white smudging against his mouth and chin. She kissed his plush lips once more, not caring if they both looked like the Joker by the time they got back to Corellia.

“Hmm,” she said playfully, removing the crown from his head to run her hands through his hair. She discarded it onto the floor next to her accessories after removing her gloves. “I think I might have an idea.” The arousal in his gaze was heady and intoxicating as she scratched his scalp with her nails. The noise that exited his mouth sounded animalistic and raw. He narrowed his eyes at her playfully and ducked his head close to hers.

“You’re lucky you’re sleeping over tonight,” he whispered at her as she thrilled from the excitement of being with him once more. “Or else I would have to break the rules of decorum, Rook be damned.” Very begrudgingly, he shifted her into a more comfortable position on his lap, tucking her into his side and cradling her in a very intimate way. They stayed like that for a few serene moments, simply enjoying the other’s company.

“Ben,” she called after a little while, and loved the way his eyes perked up when she used his name. “My feet are killing me. Can you rub them again?”

“Of course,” his voice rumbled and she snuggled in as close to his chest as possible as she felt him remove her shoes. Her feet throbbed and her ankles ached, and she let out a low groan at the feeling of his hands on her sore muscles while she moved most of her skirt away. 

He started kneading her muscles slowly, purposefully, every move of his fingers alleviating some of the tension she was feeling in her tight limbs. She let her head fall against his shoulder with a sigh, no longer caring about getting makeup on their costumes now that the night was over. Rey was almost lulled into a light slumber until she felt his hands drift under her skirt and higher up her legs, to a place where she was experiencing a very different kind of ache.

“Ben!” She whispered scandalously, but not stopping his hands as she let her legs fall open a little bit. Enough for her to gasp into his shoulder when his thumb pressed her clit over her panties. 

“Shh,” he quieted her, pressing his fingers a little firmer over her panties and forcing her to stifle a moan so their driver remained blissfully unaware of their actions. She held a fist to her mouth and bit her knuckles as he slid her panties to the side and started stroking her sensitive flesh. Knowing that they weren’t alone in the car only heightened every feeling as she kept peeking over to see if Rook had noticed him. The driver’s gaze was focused solely on the road as they made their way north on the FDR Drive. Rey closed her eyes against the sensations as Ben’s fingers became more persistent, rubbing his slick fingers up and around her slit in an undisciplined yet enthusiastic manner. She was afraid that every sigh was too loud, and it felt as if even the slightest movement was amplified in the quiet car. 

It was turning her on like crazy. Her breathing was becoming unsteady as she started to fall apart in his arms, his fingers swirling around her hard bud until fireworks exploded behind her eyes. She couldn’t scream as her body began to shiver, so she turned her head toward him and bit him in the upper part of his arm, where the material of his costume was the thickest. She was pretty sure she had caught some skin with her teeth but he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, it made his final movements even more rushed and frantic as she came down from the highest of highs, trembling in his embrace.

Rey took a shaky breath, her eyes lidded as she looked up at him. He was staring down at her with all the smugness and arrogance of a king, seemingly pleased with himself that he was able to get her off in the backseat of a car as he removed his hand and fixed her skirt. She tried to control her breathing and prayed that Rook had remained blissfully unaware. She reached up and captured his lips in a kiss that wiped away the arrogance from his face and replaced it with tenderness as she held onto the lapels of his surcoat tightly, never wanting to let go.

Her voice was still shaky, and low from arousal. “How long until we get back to your place?” They needed to get their costumes off and their hands on one another as soon as humanly possible. Rey wiggled her bottom against his crotch and could feel how much he wanted her to return the attention. 

“About thirty minutes, Miss Rey,” came her response from the front seat. She closed her eyes against the embarrassment and wondered how she would ever look Rook in the eyes again. 

“Thank you, Rook,” she called back politely, hating the imperious expression on King Kylo’s face as he preened over his masculine accomplishments. She gave him an annoyed nudge while his face split in a grin. “Keep it in your pants, Your Majesty,” she whispered. 

“You’ll have to keep me distracted somehow,” he teased before capturing her lips again, their lips dancing along to the rhythm of their hearts as he cradled her in his arms. They were content to make out for the rest of the car ride as they made it north up to Corellia, and when they arrived at the Hosnian Prime, Ben had to help her maneuver her skirt out of the car before going back in for all of their discarded accessories, including Rey’s overnight bag. Ben held her hand as the doors to the Hosnian Prime opened, passing her the wig to carry upstairs while he held the bag and crown. There were many reasons why she wanted this costume off but if she tripped over the train one more time, she was going to burn it.

Finally, after what seemed like the longest elevator ride in history, they made it to his apartment. He almost pulled her through the foyer once he unlocked it, and swept her into a blazing kiss the moment the door closed behind him.

“Bedroom,” his voice was deep, dark, and demanding. “And get that fucking dress off.”

“I don’t know how,” she moaned in his arms as she nibbled on his lower lip, catching the plush skin with her teeth. She was feeling coy and flirtatious and wanted to take advantage of it as she remembered her earlier promise to play with their costumes. “Can you help me take it off, Your Majesty?” 

His pupils looked blown out as he reacted to her words, his grip tightening on her waist. “Yes,” he let word trail off in a low hiss as he removed his arms from her waist and turned her around slowly. “I am forever at your service, My Lady.”

She could feel his eyes on the skin of her neck and back, trying to figure out how to unlace the ties. Rey felt his fingers start to move, his long, agile digits making quick work of the laces as the corset came free. 

The dress fell away from her easily after that, and she didn’t even have time to process what was happening before she found herself in his arms, lifted feet off the floor as he carried her into the bedroom.

Rey had worn nothing besides her panties under the dress, and she found herself way more bare than her boyfriend as he placed her gently upon his bed. The silk sheets felt devine against her overheated skin and she relaxed with a deep sigh into the pillows as he lorded over her from the foot of the bed. That was when she noticed that he had placed his fake crown back upon his head, and held her faux-crystal tiara in his right hand.

“Come to bed, Your Highness,” she purred from the pillows, arching her back in what she hoped was an inviting way as her small chest heaved with every breath she took. “I want to touch you.”

Ben shook his head and she pouted. “Ladies first, Your Grace.” 

He tossed her the tiara and she placed it on with a slight blush. Luckily, the makeup on her face kept her embarrassment covered. “But you already. . .”

He wouldn’t let her finish. “It wasn’t enough,” his low voice reached her from across the bed. “I want to see you.” He started to remove his surcoat, making her pulse jump from excitement. “I want to taste you.”

“Taste?” She squeaked in what she thought was a very unsexy way as he smirked, reaching for the fly of his pants as her mouth went dry.

“Taste,” he repeated, a devilish grin on his face as he dropped his boxers and reached for his cock, the head already weeping with pleasure. “Then maybe you can taste me.”

The thought made her head spin and she couldn’t think of anything more erotic than taking him in her mouth for the first time. She allowed her legs to fall open, wanting him to get started so she could finally touch him and share the ecstacy. She watched him jerk off a bit, stroking his cock to the sight of her opening her legs for him. Rey was already wet, both from their previous activities and from the heady look in his eyes as he gazed down at her.

“You are so beautiful,” he called to her, his head ducking down between her legs until all she could see was a golden crown resting on coal-black hair. She could feel his hot breath on her until he took a long and enthusiastic lick, eliciting a shout from her as her toes curled in delight.

Ben pulled away instantly. “Did that hurt?”

“No,” she gasped, trying to calm her racing heart. “No, it’s really good. Almost too good.”

He didn’t say anything else, but the wolfish grin spoke volumes as his head ducked once more. His tongue was firm and persistent as he tried to figure out a messy rhythm around her clit, and he used his fingers to work her into a more furious frenzy of sensation. She was seeing stars as their eyes met across the length of her body, and she shivered in delight at the predatory gaze she saw there. Noble as a king and dominant like a beast. She never knew it would make such an exemplary combination in bed. 

Rey’s back arched, eyes closing in wonder as another orgasm crested over her, bringing her to the throes of rapture for the second time that night as Ben moaned between her quivering thighs. She could hardly catch her breath, she was so overwhelmed, and she placed her hand on his head to gently nudge him away from her, feeling sensitive and sated.

But Rey didn’t have time to relax as she crawled up onto shaky knees, pulling Ben up so she could place a kiss on his messy lips. The taste of her permeated her senses, making her feel a bit lightheaded as she reached down to grab his cock in her hand. She gave it a light squeeze and a monstrous groan escaped him.

“Rey,” his voice sounded like it had been scraped over shards of glass.

“Lay down,” she cooed to him, watching his enormous frame topple over to the side as she continued to pump him softly. He covered his face with his arm as she continued, leaning down to get closer to him. His chest was heaving as she started swiping up the hot flesh slowly with her tongue, the wet friction making his entire body tense. The sound he made was unlike any she had ever heard him make, so small and plaintive from such a large imposing man.

“Are you alright?” She called softly, checking in on him in the same way he had done for her. He hadn’t removed his arm, but was mumbling against his skin.

“Don’t stop,” he begged her, his voice cracking. “Please don’t stop.” 

A surge of power thrilled her every cell as she looked down at the indomitable Kylo Ren and what she had reduced him to. She had never felt such strength before as she ducked her head down again and continued to service her man. His hips bucked with every swipe of her tongue over his sensitive head, and she gripped the base with her free hand because he was simply too large to pleasure all at once.

When she opened her mouth to take him in fully, the smell and taste of him heavy on her tongue, she moaned in delight as he let loose a shout of pleasure that shook the bed as his entire body tremored. Even with him hitting the back of her throat she could not take him fully, and she worked on the base in short strokes while her tongue took care of the tip. Ben’s breathing became more ragged as he gripped the sheets with his free hand, still shielding his face from sight as he came with a roar, filling her mouth with his seed that she tried to swallow. Most of it dribbled from her chin onto the sheets, and she grimaced at the bitter taste as she wiped the rest away. Ben was still breathing deeply, his chest rising and falling with every moment he came down from his own bliss as he shuddered lightly. She crawled around his limbs until she could pull his arm away from his face, and she was stunned at what she saw there.

Two matching trails of tears dripped down his cheeks as he avoided eye contact with her, trying and failing to hide his emotions as he processed his feelings. Everything they were doing together was so raw and so new, it was a relief to know that she wasn’t the only one feeling vulnerable and overwhelmed when they were being intimate.

“It’s okay,” she whispered to him as he wiped the moisture away from his face. “Please don’t hide from me.”

He looked ashamed, his voice gruff when he finally composed himself enough to speak. “I never knew,” he remarked wistfully. “I never realized how intense it would be.”

Rey had to stifle a giggle. “That’s how I feel around you probably 99% of the time.”

Ben shot her a rueful smile, the gruffness returning to his tone. “Yeah,” he blew out a shaky breath. “I feel it too.”

“Come here,” she said opening her arms to him and allowing his head to rest on her naked chest. At some point their crowns had fallen off, but she didn’t care as she stroked her fingers through his silky hair. He nuzzled into her and softly kissed the skin of her breast in an intimate way. They fell asleep like that after a few content moments, where all they could hear was the sound of the other person’s heart.

It was the sound of a phone ringing that woke Rey up numerous times the next morning, until Ben finally shut off the volume so they could get some more rest before they were forced to waken. At some point in the night their positions had shifted so that she was the one lying on his chest now that the sun had risen on the first day of November. Rey rubbed at her eyes and realized that she still had her makeup on from the night before as she yawned widely. She looked over at the clock and realized their alarm would be ringing in a few minutes. With an entire day’s worth of classes and a night’s worth of homework to catch up on, Rey decided not to delay the inevitable and got up while Ben tried to reach for her with weak limbs.

“Just where in the hell do you think you’re going?” Ben must have still been caught up in his kingly fantasies as he sleepily demanded answers from her. She tripped over their discarded crowns on the floor as she made her way to the living room to grab her overnight bag.

“We have to get up anyway, Ben, let’s go,” she went into the master bathroom to get ready while he stretched on the bed, clearly not happy to be awake. She heard the alarm ringing when she was in the bathroom and was happy for the five minute head start as she finally scrubbed all of the remaining makeup off. When she returned Ben was staring at his phone quizzically as she leaned over his shoulder to look.

“What’s the matter?”

“I have a million missed calls this morning and I don’t recognize a single number.” He shrugged, placing the phone back on his nightstand. He looked at her naked body with lascivious eyes, since they had passed out before putting on pajamas. “Are you sure I can’t entice you to come back to bed?”

Good Lord, was it tempting, but class had to take precedence over ass. “Come on, Ben. I still have to get back to campus.” He pouted playfully, releasing a long, labored sigh.

“I guess the night of fantasy is truly over,” he teased, trying to reach for her while she scooted away to get dressed.

“You guessed right, now get some pants on. Ventress will be here soon to pick up our outfits.” He groaned, but finally got up from bed and went into the bathroom to get ready for work. She was fixing her hair when the front buzzer rang, indicating a guest downstairs.

“I’ll get it, you finish getting ready. I just called Rook.” She had to fight against the blush on her cheeks when she thought about what they did behind their chauffeur’s back the night before. Ben gave the front desk permission to send Ventress up so he didn’t have to go downstairs half dressed. He unlocked the foyer door and returned to the bedroom to finish getting ready. Rey went into the living room to pick her discarded dress off of the floor, trying to shake out the many wrinkles as she heard the elevator arrive.

“Where is she?” Rey’s head perked up when she heard Ventress’ rushed tones. “I must see her!” Ventress burst through the foyer door of Ben’s apartment and looked around the space wildly, not stopping until her eyes rested on Rey. Before she knew it, Rey had been swept up in a massive hug by the intimidating stylist as she tried not to pull away on instinct.

“Oh!” Was Rey’s shocked reaction. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Ben was trying to knot his tie when he entered the living room and saw Ventress crushing Rey in a hug. Ben was just as confused as Rey was at this uncharacteristic display. “Asajj, what is going on?”

“Thank you, Rey,” Ventress pulled away from her and Rey was stunned to see tears in the bald woman’s eyes. “I cannot thank you enough. There are no words to express it. . .,” she trailed off in a sob as her face crumpled with emotion.

“Ventress,” Rey said slowly, trying to pry the older woman away from her to no avail. “You are very welcome, but can you please tell me what I did to deserve such thanks?” The woman scoffed as Ben’s eyes narrowed. 

“What did you do?” The stylist asked incredulously. “You catapulted my business into the spotlight with your comments last night.” Ventress started to repeat the things that she had told the press on the red carpet. “‘Ventress is the only person I let touch my clothing.’ My phone has been ringing off the hook all morning with people wanting the same dress as the newest It Girl, Kira Ren!” 

Ben stormed up to the intercom and slammed his hand on the button, calling the front desk. A very intimidated concierge answered. 

“Get me a copy of today’s New York Times, right now!” He demanded, the man on the other line squeaking in fear before disconnecting.

“It Girl?” Rey repeated as Ventress finally pulled away to compose her emotions. She walked around the living room and started to collect the dress, suit, and accessories. 

“Of course! The gods of fashion and high society have ordained you as one of them, Miss Kira,” Ventress said her fake name playfully. “And now I get to reap the benefits!”

“The pleasure was all mine,” Rey deadpanned, feeling overwhelmed at this influx of news as Ben met the concierge at the door with the paper. Ventress continued to collect the clothing while he ripped through the different sections, finding the Arts and Culture section as his gaze sharpened. 

He was quiet for a few minutes as he read, shaking his head before passing her the paper. She didn’t even have to read the article to know that she was in deep trouble.

The picture on the front page of the Arts and Culture section was in full color, highlighting the stunning powder blue shade of the fabric, and the intricacies of the bodice design. A coy smile was on her face as Ben lifted her up in a flourish during their dance, and she truly looked the part of a queen in his arms as they were lost in the revelry of the evening. 

The heading of the article was large, bold, and life-changing. 

_**A Royal Affair: The Newest Socialites of Manhattan’s Scene** ___

____

Rey’s eyes could barely scan over the words, she was so shocked at what she read. Apparently, Miss Kira Ren, protegee to international business tycoon Kylo Ren, was the newest addition to Manhattan’s social scene with her beguiling mix of aloof condescension and stunning sense of fashion. Everyone in New York wanted to know who she was, and where she would be showing up next. Kira Ren was the next big enigma that the world was ready to pick apart.

____

And she was a woman who didn’t really exist.

____

Rey didn’t know what to think as Ben started to angrily check all of his missed messages. They were mostly from news outlets and fashion magazines, wanting to know more about his protegee and how to contact her for events and publicity. Rey could do nothing but reread the article over and over again, her eyes lingering on the flawless face that everyone was now admiring. To Rey, the familiar face looked more like a stranger than anything else.

____

“Asajj,” Ben called Ventress over when she was finished collecting and storing the costumes away for cleaning. “I hope I can rely on your discretion with this sensitive information. I want Miss Jackson’s name to remain completely anonymous, and you are one of the only people who know of her true identity.”

____

The woman nodded. “I owe Miss Jackson an enormous debt of gratitude for the publicity she’s provided me, and I reassure you, I would never betray your trust.”

____

“I am glad to hear it,” Ben walked Ventress out with her garment bags and rejoined Rey in the living room. His phone started to ring again, but this time it was Rook.

____

“What are we going to do?” Rey asked, feeling slightly panicked at this newest development in her social life. It was bad enough trying to be a college student and a protegee, now she had to add socialite to her growing list of titles? How does one even become a socialite? She was pretty sure money and influence were involved, none of which she possessed. 

____

But Rey knew somebody who did. Maz Kanata had kept her eyes on Rey all night, and she obviously recognized something that held value. Enough to craft this entire article about her potential for social superstardom.

____

“We lay low for a while,” Ben ran a hand through his hair and tugged on the ends in frustration. “I won’t take you out for any social events until this all dies down. I’ll call my lawyer, see if he can’t arrange some kind of publicist for us so we can handle all this attention without it spiraling out of control.”

____

She released a shaky breath. “I don’t know, it kind of feels out of control already.”

____

Ben came up to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly as she used him as her anchor to reality. Kylo and Kira Ren were fake, but Ben and Rey were real, and she had to keep reminding herself of that or else she would go insane. “I promised that I would protect you, Rey, and keep you safe. I’m going to do everything in my power to make that possible. I won’t tell a single soul about the identity of Kira Ren, and you have to keep it under wraps as well. We know we can trust Ventress because she owes you for something huge, and she is not one to forget issues of the wallet easily.”

____

“I know but,” she heaved a sigh, not knowing how to interpret her feelings. All of her life she had always felt like nothing, less than nothing, and now it was like the entire world was praising a version of her that wasn’t even real. “Queen Kira Ren was a costume. That’s not the real me.”

____

His eyes turned dark and swirled with heat as she was hypnotized by his ardent gaze. His jaw worked around nothing as he tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear. “I must be the most selfish person in the whole world then, because I love that I’m the only one who gets to be with every version of you. See every single side. And marvel at the strength and beauty you exude at every obstacle.”

____

“Ben,” she crooned softly, and he leaned down to give her a chaste kiss.

____

“I want you to do something for me,” he asked, and she nodded in return. “Go back to campus. Go to class, finish your homework. Be a regular college kid and I promise that everything will go back to normal. I’ll take care of it.”

____

She looked up at him with wide eyes, knowing deep down that Ben was going to do everything in his power to take care of this issue. He was a problem solver by nature, a master negotiator, a businessman and a titan of the private sector. If anyone could help her, it was him, and she marveled at the fact as her emotions overflowed inside of her.

____

“Thank you, Ben,” she leaned in to give him a hug, needing his body close to hers as his cell phone rang again. They were keeping Rook waiting and Rey had to make it back in time for class. As much as she wanted to stay and talk through this issue with him, she had to go. “I’ll call you later tonight.” She grabbed her bag to leave, but he held onto her wrist, keeping her still.

____

“One more thing,” he pulled her in close again, lips attaching to hers as if she was his only source of air. “The costumes might be gone, but you will forever be the queen of my heart.”

____

She looked up at him with nothing but wonder in her eyes as she blessed the day she had met Ben Solo. “And you are the king of mine.” 

____

She kissed him once more, never wanting to pull away as she entered the elevator and left him to finish getting ready for the day ahead. Rey tried to focus more on the memories from the night before rather than the aftermath and wondered what Ben would be able to do to remove some of the spotlight from her. Rook was his normal, quiet self when she entered the car, too preoccupied with the Times article to be embarrassed about the night before. 

____

That was until the chauffeur made eye contact with her in the rearview mirror and shot her a wicked grin from the front seat, making her entire body erupt in a blush so fierce she wished she was still wearing the makeup from the night before as they made their way back to campus in a very awkward silence.

____


	21. Confidentiality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO SORRY about the massive delay! My new job has literally taken over my life, plus I was dealing with some serious health issues that sent me to the ER.... my life has been a giant mess. I hope this makes up for it, and hopefully I can update again soon. Thank you for your patience and support!!

Paranoia was Rey’s constant companion the next day while attending her classes on campus. It felt like the paparazzi were about to jump out from behind every corner with their cameras, and she was waiting for one of her co-eds to approach her wanting an autograph of some kind. The New York Times was sold at both the bookstore and in the Student Union Building, so she was waiting for the inevitable moment when she would be recognized by someone. It wasn’t until she made it all the way to her evening class when she realized that no one had stopped her once throughout the day. She hadn’t even heard the name Kira Ren mentioned in passing.

Either no college student read the New York Times anymore, or her disguise was adequate enough to hide her true identity from the world. Rey breathed a sigh of relief when she finished her evening class and made her way back to her dorm with Rose. She hadn’t heard from Mr. Ren since earlier that morning, but so far he seemed to have kept his promise of taking care of things. No one was lurking around campus with a camera, or stalking her every move.

For now, it seemed, Kira Ren was safe from the world.

She and Rose got ready for bed and called their respective boyfriends to say good night. Rey was hiding under her blankets to muffle her conversation with Mr. Ren, who was still at the office despite the late hour.

“No problems this afternoon, I assume,” his deep voice rumbled on the other line and she felt comforted by his care of her. 

“Not a single person recognized me,” she replied smugly. “I don’t know what you did, but it seemed to have worked.”

“I hired a publicist,” he stated firmly. “We will be meeting him on Saturday for dinner.”

“Dinner?” She repeated. “But I thought you said we had to lay low for a while.”

“We do,” he agreed. “We will be dining in at my apartment. It’s too soon to take you out yet. We need to wait a while longer for the fire around you to die down. That’s Cassian’s job.”

“Cassian?” Rey echoed.

“Yes, Cassian Andor, a very well-known publicist in Mexico who has relocated to New York. He’s one of the best in the business.”

“I hope so,” Rey urged. “I don’t like this feeling, Ben. It’s like something might jump out at me at any second.” With every moment of intimacy they shared, it was getting harder and harder for Rey to think about her benefactor as anything other than Ben. However, Mr. Ren’s voice took on a tint of anger that reminded her who she was really talking to. 

“I promised to protect you, Rey. It’s not a promise I take lightly,” his voice brokered no argument. “You have to trust me.”

“I do, Ben. There’s no one I trust more.”

“Then stop being so scared. Go back to being the fearless queen I know you to be.” Ren breathed a deep and exhausting sigh. “I should have burned that damn invitation.”

“No,” she denied. “Don’t say that. No matter what happens, it was still one of the most amazing nights of my life.” She didn’t want this regret and stress hanging over their relationship. They had enough issues to deal with barring their new celebrity status. “I’m just sorry that the backlash has been so intrusive.”

“No, Rey. It was I who directed the spotlight towards you, and I will be the one to fix it.” He sounded so steadfast and sure of himself that Rey could do nothing but believe him. So far he had kept the wolves at bay and that was more than she could have asked for. “You have work tomorrow, right?”

“Yes, and I have a huge chunk of my research paper I have to write this weekend. I am swamped with work.”

“Then I won’t keep you any longer. Our dinner appointment with Mr. Andor is at 7pm. I shall have Rook pick you up promptly at 6.”

It was still embarrassing to think of their exploits in the backseat of Rook’s car, but now instead of shame, the back of her neck was warmed by arousal. She had no idea that Ren had it in him to be so bold, and the fact that voyeurism had turned her on was news in and of itself.

“I’ll see you then,” she smiled. “I assume I’ll be staying over?”

His voice dropped down to something reminiscent of a purr. “You assume correctly.”

She chuckled warmly. “I’ll see you then. Try to get some sleep, Ben. Don’t fall back into old patterns.” 

“Of course, Rey. Your consideration is appreciated.” She rolled her eyes at his formalities. “Have a good night, Miss Jackson.”

“Good night, Mr. Ren.” They were using their last names less and less, but their conversations usually ended in the same way. It was cute, in it’s own little way.

The next day, Rey threw herself into her lingering homework and tried to make up for all the missed time studying and writing on Wednesday night. She only had two classes on Fridays, and had ample amounts of time to do work before she had to show up for any events with CCC. She was working on her research paper when she heard a ding alerting her of an email.

She clicked through her tabs until she found her campus email server, and clicked the new message. She grinned when she saw that it was from her advisor, Professor Skywalker. She didn’t have him as a professor this semester, but was looking forward to taking his sociology seminar in the spring.

_Good Morning, Sunshine!_

_How is my favorite student doing this semester? Class is not the same without you harassing me and questioning every single thing I say with your sharp wit and staggering life experiences. We need to meet soon to prepare your course load for next semester. I hope you have some exciting things to share with me from the engineering department. Tell Krennic I send my love (barf) and let me know if Monday or Tuesday works for you. I think you’ve memorized my office hours by now, so come in whenever you like._

_-Skywalker_

Rey grinned at the email, and remembered the dry, sarcastic sense of humor that her advisor possessed. She truly missed having him as a professor, simply because no teacher had ever shared a rapport quite like the one she had with Professor Skywalker. They fought and argued and bickered all the time, mostly to the chagrin of her classmates. It was one of the reasons why she had stuck with the department as a minor. Skywalker was the teacher she had been searching for all of her life.

Next semester was going to be fun, she thought to herself fondly. His seminar was on the sociological constructs of gender, which was sure to stir up some wonderful debates and conversations. She wrote back a quick response promising to meet up on Monday and returned to her research paper. The final project was due right after Thanksgiving, along with a class presentation of her prototype. There were still heaps of work to do with a looming deadline inching closer and closer, and Rey returned to her work with a fire burning through her to finally complete this project.

“Hey!” Rose entered the room after her afternoon class and immediately filled their little space with her excited energy. “Wanna go get some dinner before you go to work? I have a sushi craving.”

“Of course,” Rey agreed with an enthusiastic grin. “If I type any more my fingers might fall off.”

“I can’t believe you’re already typing the paper,” Rose lamented. “I haven’t even started the research for my idea yet.” Rose was working on an idea to make solar panels more cost efficient, which was important but infinitely easier to research than astro-physics. 

“Time is ticking, my friend,” Rey grabbed her coat to prepare for the chilly November wind. “And it waits for no one.”

“Ugh,” Rose whined. “Why does college have to be so hard?” Rey refused to answer such a silly question as they made their way to the unusually empty food court in the Student Union building. It seemed that people were more concerned with going out tonight than eating dinner.

The two roommates picked out their sushi and made their way to their favorite table, the one with the best view of the sun setting over campus. There were TVs attached to the ceiling playing various stations, and the one above them happened to be showing Entertainment Tonight. The sound was muted as Rey and Rose dug into their dinners.

“So what are you doing this weekend?” Rey asked Rose as they stole pieces of each other’s food.

“Well, I might meet Paige for lunch tomorrow in town.” Rose sighed deeply. “She keeps trying to get me to move off campus and live with her next semester and I hate turning her down.”

Rey’s eyebrows shot up at the news. “Really? You would leave campus?”

Rose shrugged her shoulders sadly. “Paige doesn’t qualify for room and board because she’s a grad student. My parents would actually save money paying monthly rent for us at the apartment than the full year’s worth of room and board for me.”

“Wow,” Rey said sadly, thinking about dorm life without her best friend. “I had no idea.”

“Yeah, well, Paige pays it all by herself, but my parents help sometimes. I know they would want us to live together for the security of it but. . .” Rose’s eyes drifted up, above Rey’s head, and their conversation trailed off as a look of confusion entered her roommate’s gaze.

“Rose?” Rey called as Rose’s jaw suddenly dropped. She pointed up at a spot above Rey’s head and started to mouth something under her breath. “What is it?”

“Rey?” Rose sounded confused and finally looked at her friend again. “Isn’t that your boyfriend, Ben?”

Rey turned around, expecting to see him walking into the Food Court. But Rose wasn’t pointing behind her, she was pointing above her. She tilted her head back and watched as her worst nightmare played out right before her eyes on the television screen.

A picture of Ben, no, of Kylo Ren, the man he was before he met Rey, was prominent on the screen next to an attractive news anchor whose report they couldn’t hear. His hair was slicked back in the same way it had been the day they met, and his ears stuck out in that awkward, endearing way she loved. His lips were turned down in a scowl and he was wearing his glasses, but it was definitely her boyfriend. The words “WHO IS KIRA REN?” were written in bold type underneath the picture and all of Rey’s body sat frozen in place as she felt Rose’s eyes turn back to her. Her normally quick mind seemed to have stalled permanently as she struggled with something to say.

“Well, he looks a bit like Ben, but I don’t really see a resemblance,” she tried to lie, turning back around and putting the television screen out of her view. Unfortunately, Rose’s eyes were still glued to the screen. Keen eyes that noticed everything.

“Rey, are you kidding me? He could be Ben’s twin!” Her head tilted to the side. “What the hell kind of name is Kylo Ren anyway?”

“A weird one,” Rey admitted honestly. She had never been a real fan of Ben’s pseudonym and couldn’t hide her chagrin. “But I don’t really see it.” She pushed away her sushi, no longer feeling hungry.

“Who is Kira Ren?” Rose echoed, reading the question from the screen. “I don’t know, who is she?”

“I didn’t know you cared about celebrity stuff,” Rey tried to distract Rose and pull her eyes from the screen, but it was no use, Rose was entranced by Ben’s photo. Rey turned around just in time to see the picture shift to the one that was featured in the New York TImes, where Queen Kira was being lifted in the arms of her King Ren. The image made her heart clench in her chest as Rose gasped behind her.

“Oh my god,” Rey turned around slowly, and Rose was looking at Rey like she was staring at a ghost. “Oh my god.”

“Rose,” Rey warned, glad that at least no one was sitting in their general vicinity and could overhear them. “Whatever you’re thinking, don’t say it.” Rey stood up quickly, grabbing her things in a rush as panic started to settle in.

“Rey, was that you?” Rose asked, her eyes shifting back and forth from the screen to her roommate. “Was that you and Ben at that fancy party?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Rose.” She said firmly. “Ben and I spent Halloween in Chappequa with his parents.”

“That is you!” She slammed her hands down on the table as Rey stood up to leave. “Rey!” 

Rey turned around and faced her friend when she noticed some people starting to stare at her. The show wasn’t playing on every TV in the food court, but she couldn’t risk drawing more attention to herself.

“Rose, please!” Rey hushed as Rose peered at her roommate like she was analyzing something under a microscope. “That was not Ben. I have no idea who Kylo Ren even is!”

Rose’s eyes were narrowed in suspicion, but the smaller girl nodded, even though she didn’t look like she believed her claims at all. “Whatever you say, Rey.” There was something in Rose’s tone that sent a shiver of foreboding down her spine, but Rey chose to ignore it rather than dig into the issue in the middle of the food court. 

“I have to go to work,” Rey shifted her bag on her shoulder. “I’ll see you later.” Rose nodded, but didn’t say anything else as Rey turned on her heel and left as quickly as she could without looking suspicious. The moment she got outside she reached for her cell phone and called Ben. When he picked up she didn’t even waste a moment on a greeting before unleashing her panic on her boyfriend.

“There was a story about us on Entertainment Tonight,” her heart was pounding and she had to take deep breaths in order to remain steady on her feet. “Rose and I saw it during dinner and I’m pretty sure she guessed the truth.”

“Fuck!” Ben cursed liberally after a moment of stunned silence. “What did you say to her?”

“I said it wasn’t us, but I don’t think she believed me. Rose notices everything,” she emphasized. “I thought this Cassian guy was supposed to take care of all these stories. They had pictures of you and everything.” 

Rey explained everything she had seen on the news report and heard Ben take a deep breath before speaking. “I told him that his priority was to take the focus off of you. Obviously, the media is trying to shift its focus onto me in order to find more information about you. I’ll call him right away and see if he can’t fix this.”

“What are we going to do about Rose?” She asked worriedly.

“Do you trust her?” The question stopped her cold.

With those four words, Rey knew that she had to make a very important choice. She was either going to put her faith in one of her best friends, or she was going to dedicate the rest of her college life maintaining lie after lie after lie. But what other option did she have? Did she truly trust Rose to keep her secrets safe?

“I don’t know,” she admitted honestly. “I’m not good at trusting people, Ben. You know that.”

“And neither am I, but look how far we’ve come in such a short time. You are now a person that I can trust implicitly, and I hope you feel the same.”

“I do,” she urged, knowing that it was true. She could trust Ben with anything. 

“So I think the best course of action is to trust Rose,” Ren admitted. “She is a tiny, scrappy young woman, but I don’t think it’s her priority to hurt you.”

Rey closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “No, I don’t think she means to hurt me, either.”

“Whatever you decide, please inform me promptly. If she knows the truth, then she needs to sign the confidentiality agreement.”

“The _what?”_ Rey screeched.

“The confidentiality agreement that my lawyer drafted today with Mr. Andor. Both Rook and Ventress have already signed it. It protects us legally if anyone in our general acquaintance exposes your identity to the press. I am going to have Hux and Phasma sign it, along with my parents as well.”

That uneasy feeling entered her gut once more. “I don’t know about this.”

“Well if you continue to conceal the truth from your friends, they never have to know about it. Inform me of your decision at once.”

“Yes, Mr. Ren,” she bit sarcastically, hating how businesslike he sounded when discussing their personal life. 

“I’ll talk to you later,” he hung up on her without another word, and she trudged her way over to the catering hall in misery, turning over every outcome of this issue in her head. As much as she wanted to remain anonymous, she had to admit that it would be nice for someone to know the truth about her and Mr. Ren, and what they meant to one another. Would it really hurt to share that part of her life with one of her best friends? That’s why people had friends in the first place, and the reason why they were called confidants. 

But if Rose inadvertently told someone, with or without signing the confidentiality agreement, it could change Rey’s life forever. Was Rey truly ready to live the rest of her life in the spotlight? To carry the mantle of socialite when in actuality she was nothing more than gutter trash?

Those questions had plagued her throughout the night, and even after the event was over she still didn’t have a concrete answer. When walking back to Hoth Hall she slowed her steps, trying to delay the inevitable even though she had no idea what to do. When she entered their room, the only light was coming from their new decorative lamp, casting the room in an eerie pink glow. 

“Rose?” She called out, not seeing her roommate right away. She was startled out of her skin when she noticed Rose sitting at her desk, typing away madly at something without paying any attention to Rey. Rey turned on more lights as she dropped her bag by her desk. “Rose, what are you doing?”

“Making sure I’m not crazy,” Rose frowned before finally turning to Rey. “And wondering why my best friend has been lying to me for the past two months!”

Rey’s heart stuttered in her chest as panic began to set in. “Rose, please. . .”

“No! I won’t sit here and listen to more lies from you!” She turned her laptop around to display the corporate website for First Order Incorporated. There, under the title of Chief Financial Officer, was Ben’s picture, the same one from the TV report. “I looked him up, Rey. You’ve been dating a millionaire this entire time!”

“No, Rose, please. It’s not like that at all,” Rey begged.

“Then tell me the truth, Rey! Stop lying to me,” Rose’s eyes started to fill with tears. “I thought you were my best friend.”

“I am,” Rey’s voice thickened with the presence of her own tears. “I wanted to tell you everything, but I never knew how. I didn’t want you to think differently of me.”

“It’s too late for that Rey.” Rose shook her head. “I don’t know what to believe anymore.” She stood up and grabbed a packed bag that was waiting by the edge of Rose’s bed. It was the same bag she brought home to Long Island whenever she returned for a visit.

“Where are you going?” Rey whimpered.

“To stay with my sister for a few days.” Rose pulled out her phone to call an Uber and Rey started to panic. If Rose knew the truth then she had to sign the confidentiality agreement and Rey couldn’t let her leave.

“You can’t!” Rey stood in front of the door and blocked it, knowing that she was way stronger than Rose. “Please, I’ll tell you everything.”

“Then start talking, Rey, or else I am leaving!” Rose was livid as the two roommates stared each other down, and Rey knew deep down that the choice had been made for her. If Rey didn’t tell her the truth now, she was going to lose her friend forever.

“He wasn’t my boyfriend at first,” she said slowly, dropping her arms from the door frame and walking towards her desk. She pulled out the diamond earrings he had gifted her weeks ago and showed them to Rose. “He was my benefactor.”

Rose took one look at the jewels and it seemed as if her eyes were going to fall out of her head. She let the bag drop to the floor and approached the desk warily, like the diamonds might bite her. “Holy shit.” She looked up at Rey and the wariness in her gaze started to shift into excitement. “Tell me everything.”

So Rey did. She started from the very beginning, from her outburst in the Financial Aid office, to their awkward first encounters, to their tumultuous foray into society and the problems it was now causing them. She made it a point to include everything, even the little white lies she had been using to cover her tracks.

By the end of Rey’s explanation it was 1AM. They were huddled on Rose’s bed together in the semi-darkness of the room, and Rose was absorbing every detail into her memory as Rey recounted it all. 

“Now that you know the truth, Ben wants you to sign a confidentiality agreement. I know it sounds a bit harsh, but he’s trying to protect me. He doesn’t want this Kira Ren thing to get too out of hand.” Rey was waiting for Rose’s reaction, but the girl still seemed to be in a bit of shock at the influx of information that Rey provided. “I hope,” she hesitated in fear. “I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

Rey let her head fall forward in shame, waiting for Rose’s final dismissal of her and their friendship. Imagine her surprise when Rose let out an excited squeal and pounced on her in a giant hug.

“Forgive you? Rey, do you know what this means?” Rey looked up in confusion as she tried to stay balanced on the bed.

“No.”

“It means that I am best friends with an honest-to-God celebrity! This might be the best thing to ever happen to me!”

Rey sighed with exhaustion as Rose pulled away from their hug. “Rose, did you not hear anything I just said? I don't want to be a celebrity. We’re trying to keep this all under wraps.”

“And so you should! No one should have to sacrifice their privacy and personal life for any reason, but think of the possibilities! Think of all the things we could do!”

“Like what? Dodge the paparazzi?”

“No, dummy! You can make some actual changes! You just told me that your Mr. Ren donates to all these charities and foundations. Think of all the good you two could do out there in the world. You study sociology, and you’re an engineer. Instead of fixing machines, you could diagnose and fix the real problems that exist out there. You two could change the world!”

It caught Rey off guard, but it didn’t take long for her to realize that Rose was right. With their newfound celebrity and influence, Ren and Rey could make some real changes as a force of good. It was a concept she had never thought about before now.

“You might have something there, Rose.”

“I know I do!” She was grinning so hard that it looked like her cheeks might split apart. “And I promise I’ll sign the papers, Rey. I have no intention of telling anyone about this.”

“What about Finn and Poe? Should I tell them the truth too?” At this, Rose looked hesitant.

“Maybe soon, but I don’t see it being a priority. Those guys don’t notice a thing.”

“So you’ll come with me tomorrow to sign the papers?” Rey reached for Rose’s hand and the smaller girl took it with a squeeze.

“I'll be there. I can’t wait to see Ben’s penthouse apartment!”

Rey squeezed Rose’s hand even tighter. “I am so sorry I lied, Rose. Thank you for understanding.”

“I might not agree with your methods, Rey, but you were trying to protect yourself. I can’t fault you for that.” Rose shook her head with a stern expression on her face. “But no more lies, Rey. From now on, I want to know the truth about you and Ben.”

“I promise.”

The girls shared another tight hug before finally going to sleep after a long and emotional day. Rey was still wary about the entire situation, but Rose had been right about one thing. Celebrities did hold a power that few people in society possessed, and Rey was curious to see how influential Kira Ren could truly be.

Maybe this whole celebrity thing wasn’t as bad as she had previously thought.

The next morning, Rose was basically hopping out of her skin with impatience as the hours ticked by slowly. While Rey was trying to fill the afternoon with homework and studying, Rose was simply waiting around for the evening to arrive, along with the opportunity to re-introduce herself to Kylo Ren, millionaire-philanthropist and surly boyfriend. Rey had called to inform him of their other dinner guest, and while it had been his idea to tell Rose the truth, he didn’t sound happy that another stranger was privy to his personal life.

Rose didn’t go out to lunch with her sister, and instead stayed in and acted like Rey’s shadow all day long, hovering over her and asking her a million questions. Rey didn’t mind sharing now that she had a confidant, and it helped make the afternoon go by much faster than usual. She didn’t get as much work done as she had hoped, but the payoff was worth it as she was finally able to discuss more specific aspects of her and Ben’s relationship.

When the clock hit 5:30, Rey closed her laptop and started getting ready. “Come on, Rose. Rook should be here in a few minutes.”

“Who is Rook?” She asked with a tilt of the head.

“My driver.” With that Rose jumped in place as a loud screech could be heard.

“That. Is. So. Cool!” She punctuated every word with a clap of her hands.

“Come on,” they made their way out to Rey’s secret spot and watched as the car pulled up. “This is where Rook picks me up and drops me off.”

“Wow,” Rose breathed as their chauffeur exited the car to open the door for them. Rey giggled at Rose’s awed expression as she slid into the seat.

“Wait until you see his apartment,” Rey shared a smile with Rose as they made their way into town. Rose’s eyes were glued to the windows, watching all the buildings pass them by. Rey grinned to herself, wondering if this was how Mr. Ren felt when watching Rey absorb it all for the first time. It was an oddly satisfying feeling.

When they pulled up in front of the Hosnian Prime, Rose looked over at Rey with such a look of shock on her face that Rey couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Close your mouth, you’re gonna catch flies.”

“I can see why you didn’t want any of us to know about Ben,” Rose shook her head, looking stunned. “We would have tortured you to death with Sugar Daddy jokes.”

“Please, God, never call him that in my presence again. That was the entire reason I never said anything.” Rook exited the car to help the ladies out, and Rey greeted the doormen who welcomed them into the building.

“Oh wow, it’s like living in a movie!” Rose said as they walked through the lobby. “Everyone is so nice to you.”

“Yeah, because they’re terrified of Ben.” Rey grinned. “He’s not as friendly as he is when I’m around.”

“Well, based on some of your stories, I can see how that’s possible.” They made their way into the elevator and Rose stared as Rey punched in Ren’s secret code. The elevator started its’ ascent and when the doors finally opened, the two young ladies were greeted by her boyfriend and a shorter man in a sharp black suit. Rey stepped forward and placed a chaste kiss on Mr. Ren’s cheek before introducing Rose.

“Ben, I believe you remember my friend, Rose Tico.” Ben reached forward and took Rose’s hand, shaking it firmly.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again Rose. I apologize for the circumstances.” He turned to the man at his side and made his own round of introductions. “Miss Jackson, Miss Tico, I present to you Mr. Cassian Andor. Our new publicist.”

“Pleased to meet you,” Rey and Rose shook his hand. The man was slim and only slighter taller than Poe was as she took in his dark eyes, dark hair, and the thin growth of facial hair that enhanced the serious expression on his face. His gaze was critical, but not unkind as he took in his newest client.

“Likewise, Miss Jackson.” His Spanish accent was thick but his English was perfect. “I am sorry for any stress the media has caused you in the past few days. I will do everything in my power to make sure your identity stays anonymous.”

“Thank you, Mr. Andor. I appreciate it.” They made their way into the apartment and Rose let out a squeak of surprise when she saw the view from the wall of windows to the right. The sun was setting, casting a vibrant glow all throughout the space as Mr. Andor started pulling documents out of his black suitcase and onto the dining room table.

“Now, Miss Tico, if you could join me in the dining room so we can sign the paperwork first.”

“Of course,” the four of them sat together at the table as Mr. Andor started to explain the documents to Rose.

“First, I will need all your email addresses, social media aliases, and the passwords for the accounts. Someone will be monitoring you to make sure you don’t mention anything on the internet.” Rose looked wary, but started to fill the information out as Rey paid close attention. “Then you need to initial these statements and sign the document on the last page. Feel free to take all the time you need to read the document before signing.”

“A-alright,” Rose started reading the document, but Rey could instantly tell that she was having problems understanding the legal jargon. Luckily, Mr. Ren was feeling generous that evening and understood legal speak.

“This section here says that you would be legally responsible if you ever disclosed any information about Rey. . .” He was incredibly patient as he outlined every section for her and highlighted the most important parts of the document. It took about twenty minutes, but Rose finally seemed comfortable enough to sign it without any undue stress. Rey breathed a sigh of relief as all of their bases were finally covered and stood up to set the table for dinner. Ren joined her in the kitchen, pulling her in for a deep, soul-searing kiss.

“I hope this works,” she whispered against his lips. 

“We’ll be fine. Everyone who knows about us has signed the papers. Now we just have to wait a while for the hype to die down around Kira Ren.”

“Well,” Rey started playing with the collar of Ren’s soft grey sweater. “Rose mentioned something before about the power of celebrity. Maybe we shouldn’t wait too long before entering society again. I think that maybe Kira and Kylo could do some good in this city if given the chance.”

Ren looked wary, but nodded his head. “We’ll talk to Cassian, see what he says about it.” He placed a chaste kiss on her forehead and helped her bring dinner to the table. Mr. Andor was putting away all the documents while Rose was still looking around the apartment, completely entranced by her surroundings. 

“What does your timeline look like for the rest of the month, Ren?” Cassian asked as he put away his suitcase. “We need to plan for your next foray into society.”

“I leave for London on the fifteenth, and I should be back before Thanksgiving. I have not accepted any invitations recently in order to conceal Miss Jackson’s identity, but we must keep in mind that there will be a plethora of events within the month of December, culminating in the First Order Banquet on the 22nd.”

“A banquet?” Rose repeated wistfully, her hands clasped together. 

“Yes, the First Order throws it every year. It’s quite the grand event, actually.” Ren explained as he opened a bottle of wine for him and Mr. Andor. Rey doubted that any event could be as grand as Maz Kanata’s masquerade ball, but her interest was fully piqued as she sipped at her ginger ale.

“Mr. Andor,” Rey began, wondering how to approach this subject with her new publicist. “I was thinking about ways to use my newfound celebrity to do some good in society. Is there any way to stay anonymous while still taking part in charity events and fundraisers?”

The man looked thoughtful while chewing on his salmon. “Well, any donation could be made anonymously, Miss Jackson, but it sounds like you would like your contributions to be a bit more personal. With Halloween being over, I doubt you will have many more opportunities to hide behind a mask, but you’d be surprised with how eclectic some of these events can be. I’ll do some research on it and get back to you and Mr. Ren.”

“Thank you,” she glanced over at Rose and her roommate was beaming while stuffing her mouth with rice and vegetables. Rose’s idea was now permanently stuck in Rey’s head and she wanted to do some actual good in the world. Something that was more than research and paper writing. 

Rose gulped down her food audibly and raised her can of ginger ale in the air. “To Kira and Kylo Ren!” She toasted brightly with a grin. “Changing the world one donation at a time!”

“To changing the world,” Ren purred, making goosebumps rise on her skin as Mr. Andor joined in.

“To changing the world,” she echoed, tattooing the words on her heart like a promise.


	22. Easy Like Sunday Morning

Dinner was a quiet affair. Mr. Andor was a lot like Mr. Ren in regards to his taciturn demeanor and lack of conversation, and had no problems staying silent throughout the meal. Rey could tell that Rose had plenty that she wanted to say, based on the way her knee was bouncing under the table, but kept it all to herself. Rey kept shooting looks at Mr. Ren, wondering why his face was pinched in such a look of distaste for the majority of the evening. It couldn’t be because of the food, since it was the most mouth-watering salmon she had ever tasted. 

She had tried to start a conversation multiple times, but with only Rose to engage, most of her attempts fell flat. She could tell that her friend was still overwhelmed by Mr. Ren’s actual status in life, since her friend could not stop gaping at the decor surrounding her. She tried her best to be a good hostess, but her guests were making it quite difficult for her to succeed.

“I must be going,” Mr. Andor stated abruptly, standing up after pushing away his empty plate. “I have a meeting with another client in Manhattan tonight.” Mr. Ren stood up to shake his hand.

“Thank you for coming by, Cassian. I will send you my social calendar for the next six weeks. Please keep me aware of any new news reports or stories about me and Rey.”

“Of course, Mr. Ren. We will speak again soon.” Rey stood up to say a proper goodbye to her new publicist. The fact that a nobody like her even had a publicist still seemed unreal. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Miss Jackson.”

She reached out to shake his hand. “Likewise. Thank you, Mr. Andor.”

“I doubt you will have any more problems with the press, but stay under the radar for awhile and inform me immediately if you believe your identity has been compromised.”

She had to shake off the sense of unease she suddenly felt when he dropped her hand. “I will.”

“Miss Tico,” he nodded towards Rose, who was still busy shoveling risotto into her mouth. “Have a good evening.”

“Bye!” Rose called out between mouthfuls of food. Rey snuck a peek at Mr. Ren and the man looked horrified at the half-chewed food that could be seen in her friend’s mouth when she spoke. Rey winked at him and he shook his head with a deep sigh.

“I’m surrounded by vagabonds,” he muttered under his breath as they walked Mr. Andor to the foyer. “You’re all collegiate savages.”

She nudged him in the side with her elbow and said a bright, “Goodbye!” to cover his “Oof!” of pain. He rubbed the area on his arm where she hit him with a deep pout pulling down his lips. 

“Violent savages,” he added dryly.

“How are you doing, Rose?” Rey asked as she sat back down at the table. Mr. Ren started to bring the empty plates into the kitchen to clean up.

“This is the best food I’ve eaten since I last visited my parents! I didn’t know rice could taste so good!”

“It’s risotto,” Mr. Ren called haughtily from the kitchen and Rey rolled her eyes at Rose.

“Ignore him. He can be a real snob sometimes.” She was waiting for him to argue with her, but was surprised when he confirmed her claims.

“It’s not my fault if I appreciate the finer things in life, Miss Jackson. It’s a lesson I have been trying to impart on you for the past two months.”

“Well, there’s a difference between being cultured and being a brat.” Mr. Ren’s eyes looked as if they were going to bulge out of his head, but Rose just laughed as she drained the rest of her ginger ale. 

“I knew it! You guys are perfect for each other,” Rose laughed. “When are we heading home?”

“Well,” Rey hedged, peeking at Mr. Ren’s smug expression as he did dishes in the kitchen. “I was going to sleep over here tonight. But we can have Rook drop you off wherever you want.”

Rose’s face slowly broke out into a grin that could have rivaled the Cheshire Cat. She even raised her brows playfully for a more teasing affect. “Oh really? Well that sounds like a fun night for you two.” She stood up and stretched. “Don’t let me stand in your way of a good time.”

“I’ll call Rook,” Mr. Ren announced from the kitchen, his voice taking on an edge of impatience. Rey didn’t want to be rude, but she also didn’t want her best friend to cockblock her when she could be spending her time fooling around with her boyfriend. “He should be here in ten minutes.”

“Great,” Rose pulled out her cell phone. “Let me text Finn and see what he’s up to.”

“Remember,” Ren warned sternly from the kitchen. “You are now beholden to a legal contract, Rose Tico. Nothing about Rey, or me, or our relationship can be shared under penalty of law.” His gaze sharpened on her best friend and she looked more than a little intimidated. “We are trusting you.”

“God, Rey, you were right,” she whispered to her friend from the corner of her mouth without breaking eye contact with Mr. Ren. “He is a bit scary.”

“This is him on a good day.”

“So what can I share?” Rose asked Mr. Ren. “Finn is my boyfriend and he’s going to ask where I was all evening.”

“Just say you went out to dinner with Rey and her boyfriend,” Mr. Ren finished cleaning the dishes and rejoined them in the living area. “Keep it simple. Uncomplicated. It’s the only way you’re going to be able to maneuver the legalities of the contract.”

Rose nodded, a sense of determination in her every movement. “Yes, sir.”

“Thank you, Rose,” Rey hugged her friend fiercely, pulling her in as close as possible as she leaned her cheek on the smaller girl’s head. “You have no idea how much this means to me. To us.”

“Of course, Rey. You’re my best friend. You know I would do anything for you.” Rey pulled away and wiped the errant tear that seemed to spontaneously appear on her cheek. What did she ever do to deserve such wonderful people in her life?

Mr. Ren cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable with the influx of feminine feelings. “Rook is here, Rose. Let’s get you downstairs.”

Rose nodded and Rey walked by her side into the foyer with Mr. Ren close behind them. Rey gave her friend a fierce hug and made Rose promise to start doing her research this weekend. Rose rolled her eyes but humored her friend and said yes before turning to say good night to Mr. Ren.

Rey watched in amusement as her roommate and boyfriend struggled with awkwardness while saying goodbye to one another. In their group of friends they normally hugged one another, but Rey knew for a fact that Mr. Ren was not the most affectionate person in regards to new people. He was barely affectionate with her.

“Good night, Ben,” Rose’s eyes flew open in fear at the casual slip. “I-I mean, Mr. Ren,” she rushed to apologize, but Rey watched as a tight smile pulled up his cheeks. He reached over and awkwardly patted Rose on the head, ruffling her hair a little bit in the process.

“Have a good night, Miss Tico.” Rey had to bite the inside of her cheek in order to stop herself from laughing at him. The elevator dinged and Rose bounced her way inside, waving at the two of them as the doors closed.

“Bye!” A moment later, her friend was out of sight, and she was finally alone with Mr. Ren. 

Rey didn’t have a moment to breathe before she felt herself being lifted up into the air. Ren threw her over his shoulders like she was nothing more than a sack of potatoes as he brought her back into his apartment, kicking the foyer door closed behind him with a loud slam. 

She sputtered unattractively and started to pound her fists on his back in anger. “Oi! You big brute! Put me down!”

“Not until we get into the bedroom,” he chuckled darkly. “I have been waiting all night to do this.”

“You have the social graces of a gorilla. I saw the way you petted Rose’s head like a dog.”

He shrugged but did not seem very contrite. “She is tiny,” he stated like it explained everything. “And I appreciate what she’s doing for us. It was the first thing that came to mind.”

They finally made it to the bedroom and he flopped her down on the bed with the finesse of a lumberjack. Her butt bounced on the bed as she regained her bearings.

“Will you stop that!” She yelled, tired of his brutish behavior. Her complaints died on her lips when she looked up and realized he was already half undressed. She could see the bulge in his pants and her mouth went dry in an instant, completely forgetting why she was so annoyed. 

“Um…” she trailed off as he started to unbutton his pants.

“Am I to be the only one nude this evening?” He smirked at her with a raised eyebrow. “I believe it would be much more fun if we were both undressed.” He dropped his pants and her eyes widened at his erect girth, so hard it was basically pointing up towards his belly button. Her mouth watered and she quickly reached for clothing, tossing her shirt and bra over her head before reaching for her pants.

“Now that’s more like it,” he hummed appreciatively as they achieved the same level of undress, and he kneeled on the bed and started crawling towards her. She allowed him to climb completely over her body, pushing her back into the mattress as he hovered over her. She could feel his cock pressing against her pelvis, making a million jolts of electricity fire up her veins. 

His hair fell down around his face as he appraised her from his dominant position, and she lay completely still while waiting for him to do something, anything to quell the sudden and persistent ache between her legs. She rubbed her thighs together, licking her lips in anticipation of what would come next. 

“Hi,” he said softly, the facade of Kylo Ren melting away in front of her eyes until Ben was the only thing she could see. His smile was warmer, his eyes more expressive, his demeanor and body language relaxed and happy. He reached up to cup her cheek in his palm as he traced her lips with his thumb.

“Hey,” she gasped, the air almost leaving her lungs as he closed the distance between them with a soft, sensual kiss. His lips were so plush and soft, she thought she could kiss him forever. Adamant, yet affectionate, it felt like they were kissing for hours as their naked bodies pressed against one another. 

He let out a long, low hiss as he pulled away, jerking his hips against her pelvis in a motion that made her more wet than she already was. It was a mockery of the act that neither had done, but it still set her body aflame as she struggled to breathe through the passion.

“I’ve been dying to kiss you like this all night,” he whispered against her lips. “From the moment you arrived, I just wanted everyone to leave us alone.”

“Tsk, tsk,” she teased playfully. “You’ve been doing so well with this whole socialization thing. Don’t let me distract you from your goals.”

“When you’re around, getting in your pants is my only goal,” he quipped playfully, catching her lips in another kiss while she stifled her giggles. “God, you’re beautiful.”

“So are you,” she crooned up at him, reaching up to push the hair away from his face and cupping his cheek in return. “My beautiful Ben.”

He ducked his head away from her attention, embarrassment coloring his cheeks in a bright red and spreading all the way up to his ears. She leaned forward and trailed a line of kisses up his cheek, along his jawbone, and up towards his ears, where she playfully bit his earlobe. “I want you, Ben,” she whispered into his ear. “Please don’t keep me waiting anymore. Touch me.”

“Yes,” he gasped, already reaching down to caress her breasts. He ducked his head and lapped at her right nipple, taking it into his mouth with a suckle and a soft nip of his teeth. She gasped, her back arching off of the bed as a long moan slipped from her mouth. She ran her fingers through his hair, holding his head in place as he worshiped her breasts. His talented tongue laved at the valley between them as he switched to the other side, trying to dedicate the same amount of attention to both. She giggled as she rubbed her legs together again, brushing up against his erection while he groaned in appreciation.

When he pulled his head back up, his lips were swollen from sucking on her breasts, the sheen of saliva shimmering around his mouth. Ben’s pupils were blown wide, his arousal evident on his face and coursing through his body. Both his eyes and his voice were dark when he spoke next.

“Do you want to have sex tonight?” The question made her eyes go wide in shock. “I bought condoms.”

Rey tried not to let the mental image of Ben buying his first pack of condoms distract her from his very important question. While they had been fooling around for a while, they hadn’t yet spoken about when they were going to cross the final line of intimacy. His question seemed abrupt and threw her off guard as she pulled away, sitting up and putting some much needed distance between their heated bodies.

“Um,” she tucked her hair behind her ear, suddenly nervous under his gaze. “We haven’t really talked about it, Ben.” Would he be mad if she said no? She hesitated before saying anything else, trying to measure out her response before he cut her off with a firm shake of his head.

“No, forget I said anything,” he looked angry, but at himself instead of her. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have mentioned it before talking to you.”

“I mean,” she felt awkward under his heated gaze and noticed her arousal quickly slipping away. “You know how I feel about you, Ben. Please tell me you know how I feel.”

“Of course, Rey,” he said her name in that soft tone he only reserved for her. “It is not my intention to push you out of your comfort zone. We can wait as long as you need.” He leaned over to place a small kiss on her forehead and she smiled at him gratefully. Rey was grateful that he seemed to understand her hesitance. 

She still felt awkward however, and rushed to apologize for her shaky feelings. “I-I’m sorry, you know I want to do that with you-,” Ben silenced her with a firm and insistent kiss, his plush lips helping to chase away the lingering uneasiness and bringing her arousal back up to the surface.

“Never apologize for the way you feel, especially when it comes to sex,” he whispered against her lips. “We’ll talk about it and decide when we’re both ready. There’s no reason to rush.”

A tear sprung to her eyes as she swallowed past the emotion in her throat. “Thank you, Ben.”

“Shh,” he cooed to her softly, wrapping his arms around her and bringing her close in a soft embrace. Rey tucked her face into the crook of Ben’s neck and nuzzled him fondly, loving how his arms cocooned her in warmth and affection. She could bask in this feeling forever, if not for the steady press of Ben’s dick against her bottom. She wiggled against it experimentally and received a low, ragged groan from Ben in return. 

“I want to touch you,” she whispered as she leaned up to lightly nip his earlobe. “I want you in my mouth again.”

He looked down at her as if she were an angel descended from the heavens. “You are utterly amazing.” He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Can we try something new?” At her wide eyes, he quickly clarified. “I want oral as much as you do. How about we both do it at the same time?”

Her eyebrows rose in shock. “You want to try sixty-nine?”

Ben’s returning grin was wolfish and made her tummy quiver in anticipation. “Yes, I want to do exactly that.” His gaze grew serious once more. “But only if it’s okay with you.”

Rey started to push him backwards, until he was the one resting on the mattress as she straddled his waist. His hair fanned out over the pillows, making Ben look like some kind of Adonis, spread out like a buffet in front of her. “That sounds amazing. Let’s do it.”

“Whenever you’re ready,” he gasped as she climbed off of him and turned around, throwing her leg over his waist so she was now facing his legs and feet. His cock was steel and she could see the small bead of precum leaking from the tip as she bent over him. 

“Is this good?” Rey called behind her, and gasped when she felt his large, strong hands pull at her hips.

“Move your butt back a little bit,” Ben ordered. “Open your legs a little more.” She obeyed and shimmied her hips back while arching her back, feeling open and exposed in the most delicious way. “That’s it,” he crooned. “There’s that beautiful pussy.”

“Yours,” she called back, grabbing his cock in her hand and pumping it softly. “And this is mine.”

“All yours, Sweetheart,” Ben hummed against the slick, sensitive skin between her legs before licking a long strip up her slit. Rey moaned once before muffling the sound with his cock, taking it as far back into her mouth as she could without gagging. She felt the muscles of his legs and abdomen tighten beneath her as he plunged his tongue into her open center, making her hips buck back in delight.

The sensations were all Rey could focus on. The taste of him was musky and masculine as she licked and sucked with endless enthusiasm. Ben seemed to feel similarly as his tongue energetically lapped away at her core. She moaned her pleasure around his cock, and his returning sighs seemed to reverberate throughout her entire body. Her body felt electric, and she now understood why this was such a popular position.

Her pleasure was cresting in a wave of jubilation as she felt her legs go weak, fluid gushing from her as she pulled away from him with a cry of release. He held onto her hips tighter, his tongue lapping at every drop of her his tongue could reach. Her breathing was staccato and rushed as she came down from the dizzying heights, and instead of collapsing in a rush of limbs, she reached for Ben’s cock once more, pumping and sucking so he could join her in the heights of ecstasy.

Ben called out a short warning that he was coming, but she wasn’t going to stop until she returned the favor and licked up every drop of him. She swallowed greedily when he finally came in her mouth with a desperate shout, the timbre of his voice causing her knees to shake once more. Nothing was more arousing to Rey than watching the powerful man who had captured her heart fall apart beneath her touch. 

He hissed with sensitivity, and rubbed her hips softy as she released him and pulled away. She plopped herself down on the space next to him while she shifted around so she was facing him again. His breathing was heavy and stilted as he regained control of his bearings, and when he opened his eyes, they were shining with an emotion she had never seen there before. It made him look so young and open and carefree as he captured her in his gaze.

“Come here,” he pulled at her until she was nestled against his side, his long arms wrapping around her tightly and securely. She kissed the little dark birthmarks on his shoulder and basked in the warmth of the afterglow. Rey imagined it being the closest thing to magic she could ever experience in this world. “Did you like that?” His voice was soft, and rumbled through his chest like a purr.

“I liked that a lot,” she agreed, nestling herself next to him even further. “I’m glad we tried something different.”

“All you have to do is say the word, Rey. We’re setting this at your pace. I want you to feel good.” Rey reached up to place a deep and grateful kiss on his willing lips. She could still taste the remnants of her on his lips and tongue and she wondered if he could taste himself.

“You make me feel good, Ben. Thank you for understanding.” She would have expressed more of her gratitude, if not for the massive yawn that threatened to crack her jaw apart. After a long day of homework and a great night of oral sex, Rey was more than a little bit tired as Ben reached over to shut off the small bedside lamp.

“Sleep, Sweetheart,” he said, using the term of endearment on her once more. He said it with rumble of affection that thrummed against her heart. “We will talk in the morning.” She started to stroke at her hair, running his fingers through the strands in a motion so hypnotizing, she was asleep in mere moments.

When she woke up, their bodies were tangled against one another in a puzzle of limbs, and she groaned when she felt the rays of sunshine blinding her with morning light. He pulled her in closer, moaning his own distaste as he peeked open an eye and met hers.

“Hey,” she croaked through her dry throat.

“Good morning,” he stretched his giant limbs and got up from the bed as she appreciated his still-naked body. They hadn’t bothered getting dressed after their sixty-nine session last night and she was enjoying the view. “What do you want for breakfast? I feel like making a frittata.”

“Well, I’ve never had a frittata before, so surprise me,” she grinned at the shocked look on his face.

“Now I have to bring out the big guns,” he leaned down to give her a kiss before going into his drawers and pulling on a pair of black sweatpants. He didn’t bother with a shirt and allowed the pants to rest low on his hips in a way that made her already dry mouth feel like a desert. “What do you want in it? Tomatoes? Spinach? Mushrooms?”

“I hate mushrooms,” she pouted up at him, batting her eyelashes for extra effect. The look of mock offense on his face made her giggle.

“Then death to all mushrooms. I will never buy another member of the fungus family again.”

“Just the fact that you called it the fungus family is enough reason for me to never want to eat mushrooms.” His laughter echoed down the hall as he made his way towards the kitchen. 

“Come in when you’re ready,” he called to her as she ran her fingers through her tangled hair. She retrieved her bag and went to the bathroom, trying to make herself look as presentable as possible before joining him in the kitchen. He was stirring up the eggs when she tried and failed to peek over his broad frame.

“What did you put in mine?” She asked, trying to maneuver her head around to see what he was stirring.

“Fourteen different kinds of mushrooms,” he joked, keeping the bowl out of sight as she laughed once more. She hadn’t seen him in such a jovial mood since their very first cooking lesson, when she had smashed eggs all over the place. “Now go away and let me cook in peace.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” 

“Yes, go and set the table. Your tea is almost ready.” The fact that he simply knew to make her tea made her heart burst with affection for him as she rummaged through his cabinets and drawers for plates and silverware. She set the table and put on some soft pop music for them to enjoy during breakfast. She knew he was partial to classical, but sometimes she needed to listen to music with an actual beat to it. 

When he carried her frittata to the table and slid it off the frying pan, her eyes widened in delight and hunger at the abundance of food in front of her. The eggs looked fluffy and well seasoned, and she could see diced tomatoes, chopped spinach, and veins of cheddar cheese throughout what looked like a giant egg pancake. Ben placed hot sauce and ketchup on the table before returning to the kitchen to get their drinks. 

When they finally sat down to eat, she couldn’t help herself. She got right back up and walked to Ben’s chair, draping herself on his lap before he could even cut his food. Rey wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply in appreciation of another wonderful meal made by his hands. 

“Thank you, Ben,” she cooed against his lips. “This looks delicious.”

“Well go taste it,” he grinned against her mouth before kissing her again. “Then you can kiss me again.”

She hopped off of his lap with a grin before settling down and cutting into her breakfast. The flavors that hit her tongue were so simple, yet so delicious. She wondered how many egg recipes Ben knew, and if every one was as delicious as this frittata. 

“Ben, you sure know how to cook eggs.” She spoke between bites and he smiled ruefully.

“Right after college, it was the only thing I knew how to cook. I think I’ve perfected every egg dish imaginable. I’ll have to make you a quiche.” They grinned at one another before fully digging into their meal, the companionable silence being filled with some soft piano ballad that she had heard on the radio a few times before. 

When they were both finished, they continued to sit at the table and nurse their drinks as the morning passed them by. She found such pleasure in just looking at him, and counting the numerous birthmarks on his face and neck. In fact, it felt as if she could stare at him all day and always see something new about him. He was so handsome in his uniqueness, she could barely stop staring at him.

Luckily for her, he seemed to find her just as interesting as he took stock of her features as well. After a few more moments, he broke the trance that had fallen between them with a simple question.

“What plans do you have this week?” 

“Well, I have a job lined up for Friday, as usual, and I have a meeting with my academic advisor tomorrow. I’m really excited to see him. It’s been a while because I don’t have him as a professor this semester.” At this, Ben looked puzzled.

“That’s not true, you have two classes with Krennic this semester.” Rey smiled fondly and shook her head.

“No, my academic advisor is through the Sociology department. I didn’t like the way Krennic handled my planning when I was a Freshman.” The man had told her to front load all of her math and science classes in the first few semesters before taking her electives, and she knew for a fact that she would have short circuited her brain if she had tried it. No, she had made the right choice in switching departments and choosing Skywalker for the job.

“The sociology department?” He looked confused, and a little bit wary for some reason. “So who is your advisor?” He asked before taking a sip of coffee.

“Only my favorite teacher in the entire school,” she grinned. “His name is Professor Skywalker.”

A giant spray of coffee erupted from Ben’s mouth as he sputtered wildly in response to her claim. His eyes looked like they were about to pop out from their sockets as he glared at her murderously.

“What?!” He yelled, instantly angry as their peaceful Sunday morning was obliterated in a shower of caffeine. “You-You’re letting that man handle your collegiate career?”

“Ben, what is the meaning of this?” She backed away from the table to get some paper towels and clean up his mess. The man had a penchant for spitting out his food when caught off guard. “Skywalker is like a father to me. I’ve known him for years and he’s never steered me wrong.”

“Well aren’t you the lucky one,” he sneered as he wiped the area in front of him with a napkin. The entire dining room now smelled like coffee as he frowned deeply at the mess he made.

“I’m not talking to you when you speak in riddles and act like a jerk.” She continued to clean up the spittle and coffee without looking at him in the eye. “In fact, you might as well call Rook.”

“He’s my uncle!” Ben stated angrily, his jaw ticking in frustration. She was shocked at this influx of information, but remembered him mentioning his rocky relationship with his uncle in the past. “So I’m sorry if my disdain for him is a little too personal for you.”

“Ah, finally, Lord Kylo Ren deigns to reveal another facet of his secret life to his ignorant little girlfriend.” She scoffed while throwing away the dirty paper towels. 

“What do you want to know, Rey?” He stood from the table and she had to stop herself from being distracted by his perfectly sculpted chest as their argument continued. “How my Uncle and Father never saw me as anything other than a menace? How they turned their backs on me the moment I needed them the most?”

“Maybe I do want to know these things, Ben. Have you ever thought of that? Have you ever once tried to actually open up to me instead of feeding me bits of information like dogs with table scraps?”

His eyes hardened into something cold and unfamiliar. “I could say the same thing about you, Rey.” 

She had to stave of the glowing panic shimmering under her skin at his words. “I’ve told you plenty, Ben. I’ve told you everything you needed to know.”

“And I did the same,” he grit through his teeth. “Little did I know how entwined you were in my life before now.”

“So stop blaming me for keeping things from you in ignorance. Whatever issues you have with your uncle, leave me out of it. He’s one of my favorite people in the entire world. That’s not going to change just because you have issues with him.”

“Yes, I can see that,” his fists clenched at his sides and she could sense that he was still angry. She just couldn’t tell if he was angry with her, or angry with his uncle. He closed his eyes before taking a deep breath. She mentally counted to fifteen before he opened his eyes again. He still seemed tense, but there was an air of resolve around him now that tempered his anger. “I’m sorry for my reaction, Rey. It was uncalled for and unnecessary.”

She crossed her arms over her chest, feeling vulnerable after his outburst. “Yeah, it was, but I forgive you. Just don’t let your issues with your family get in the way of my education, please? I happen to genuinely like Professor Skywalker, and it makes me happy that you’re his nephew because that means we can keep in touch more.”

“I don’t want him to know you’re my girlfriend,” he grumbled as all the anger and frustration left him in a rush of despondence. “He’ll try to twist you away from me.” She let her arms drop in a sigh as she watched his head hang down in misery. Rey approached him slowly and wrapped her arms around his giant frame. She felt him relax into her embrace until his head rested on her shoulder.

“Nothing could ever change the way I feel about you, Ben. You are mine and I am yours.”

“You are mine and I am yours,” he closed his eyes and repeated their mantra one more time. “You are mine and I am yours.”

“And I want to know about your past, Ben. I want to know these things about you. Skywalker might be my teacher, but you’re my everything.” She sighed deeply, knowing what she had to say next. “And I will try to open up more as well. There are some things I want you to know about me, but I’ve been too scared to tell you.” 

Terrified would be a more appropriate word, but she wasn’t ready to reveal the depth of her history yet. God, could she be any more of a hypocrite? She was suddenly ashamed of their entire fight and wanted it to end so she didn’t have to think about this anymore.

“Never be scared, Rey. I am here for you when you’re ready.” He lifted his head from her shoulder and placed a kiss on her forehead. “I’m sorry I ruined our morning.”

Alright, she thought to herself, enough sadness and anger for one day. Rey knew the perfect way to turn this morning around, and fully intended to make the most of it.

“Well,” her voice took on a lilt of flirtation as she ran her hands down his perfectly chiseled pecs, her fingertips flicking against his nipples. “The morning’s not done yet, Ben.”

“Oh yeah?” In an instant, his anger melted away at the promise of more time in bed with Rey. “Well then, I know what I have to do.”

With a happy scream of surprise, Ben threw Rey over his shoulder once more, heading towards his bedroom while Rey’s half-hearted attempts at arguing were smothered by Ben’s barking laughter echoing down the hallway.

The rest of the morning was much better after that.


End file.
